Chapter 441 "Because, I love you more than your grandfather..."
441:
At that moment, Mu Feng heard the sound of a string breaking.
With a loud "bang," it was like a deafening noise, almost deafening him.
He felt like he was hallucinating.
But he knew perfectly well that it was all true.
He truly heard what Qin Cheng said, and he heard his hopes and pleas.
He looked at his grandson kneeling before him, and after a long while, he finally spoke, "Where's Xiaoxi? Does he want to be with you?"
“He is willing,” Qin Cheng said.
Mu Feng didn't say anything; he knew this would happen.
He knew Qin Cheng's personality all too well, having watched him grow up from childhood.
If Ye Qingxi hadn't been willing, he would never have come to say such things to her.
He would rather die than force Ye Qingxi to accept his feelings.
I certainly wouldn't bring this matter to his attention and upset him.
"You know, I don't like men being with men." Mu Feng's voice was deep, like a sleeping wave about to surge and cause a tsunami.
"I know," Qin Cheng said, head bowed.
"You should also know that Xiao Xi is not our child. He is your Grandpa Ye's child. He is your only grandson and your only bloodline."
"I know."
"Then why should I give you a chance?" Mu Feng questioned him. "Why do you think I'll give you a chance?!"
“Because I love him,” Qin Cheng said in a deep voice. “I will love him, protect him, and take care of him for the rest of my life.”
"So what?! You're his brother, won't you love him, protect him, and take care of him for the rest of your life?!"
"Of course I will, but Grandpa, a partner and a brother are different!"
“I am his brother. I am willing to protect him and love him for the rest of my life, but I cannot be by his side every moment. I cannot help him protect himself from the hurt caused by his love.”
"If his wife doesn't love him enough, if his children don't love him enough..."
"Your brother can't have such bad taste!"
"But no one will ever love him more than I do!" Qin Cheng shouted, staring directly at the person in front of him.
The air was somewhat still at that moment.
Mu Feng heard the ticking of the second hand, and heard Qin Cheng ask him, "Grandpa, do you believe it? Do you believe that in the future he will meet a girl who loves him far more than I love him?"
Mu Feng: ...
Mu Feng remained silent.
Qin Cheng knew that.
"You don't believe it either, do you?"
“This is not a reason for him to be with you.” Mu Feng tried to tell him, “You may love him the most, but loving him the most does not mean he should.”
"I love him too, and his father loves him too. Does that mean we should be with him as well?"
"There are many kinds of love. The love between lovers may not be as great as the love between parents and brothers, but that is not a reason for parents and brothers to stay with him."
“But that’s the reason I can be with him,” Qin Cheng replied.
"Grandpa, if possible, I also hope that Xiaoxi will get married and have children, and have a wonderful family."
“I didn’t want to be with him from the beginning. In the very beginning, I just wanted to like him quietly. In fact, if we hadn’t grown up and our emotional world hadn’t broadened, I would have been willing to just be his brother, and only his brother for the rest of my life.”
"But I can't."
"As we grow up and develop a concept of love, our previous feelings naturally change."
“I thought about keeping it from him, and I even did it. I didn’t tell him anything, I didn’t let him know anything, and I just quietly liked him on my own.”
“I’ve thought about it too. As long as I can take care of him and protect him, my brother is fine. There’s no need for me to stand by his side or be with him.”
"So I didn't say anything, I didn't dare to say a single word."
"But he likes me, Grandpa, do you know that? He actually likes me too."
"So I have no choice."
"I'm just a mortal. I'm happy when the person I like likes me back, and I want to be with him because we love each other."
"If he doesn't like me, I will never let him know how I feel about him."
“But when he liked me, he said he wanted to be with me, and I couldn’t push him away, reject him, or even lie to him that I only saw him as a younger brother.”
"I love him," Qin Cheng said sincerely. "I don't want him to be sad."
"I don't want to see the disappointment in his eyes."
"I also have my own selfish motives."
“I want to be with him, so I have no choice.”
“Grandpa, I know what you care about, and I know how cruel this is to you. I know that over the years, you have loved him more than you have loved yourself. You want him to live well and live happily. You want Grandpa Ye’s bloodline to be passed on, and you want him to have all the good things in the world.”
"If I could, I would love for us to have a child. In fact, if Xiaoxi's values weren't so sound, I would accept him having a child with another woman."
“Right now, I’m telling you all this, saying I want to marry him, saying I want to be with him for life. But if one day, Xiaoxi feels that I’m more suited to be his brother, that his feelings for me were misplaced from the beginning, then I’m willing to give up my place by his side for someone more suitable, someone he has in his heart.”
"Just like you, I love him far more than myself, so all I want is for him to live well, to live happily and healthily, and to live a life where he can reach out and grab whatever he wants."
"If he loves me, then I will be his boyfriend, his partner, and accompany him through this century."
"If he doesn't love me, then I will leave his side, just stand behind him, silently, and protect him without disturbing him."
"I don't ask for our love to last forever, I only ask that everything goes smoothly for him in his life."
Mu Feng didn't expect him to say so much.
From a young age, Qin Cheng was not a talkative child.
He is like him, like his father, preferring to do things rather than talk about them.
Those beautiful and pleasing words are not that they can't say them, but that they are too lazy to say them or disdain to say them.
But now, he was kneeling before him, speaking incessantly and tirelessly, hoping for a positive response.
Mu Feng's heart softened at that moment, and he felt sadness at that moment as well.
He was not saddened by himself, but by his friend.
Ye Qingxi is the only one left in the Ye family.
Ye Min and Ye Huai are both gone.
Only Ye Qingxi remains, the sole bloodline of the Ye family.
This is the last glimmer of light for the Ye family.
Before his death, his old friend entrusted his grandson to him with deep reluctance and trust.
It's not that I want him to cause the Ye family to be wiped out.
It's not that I want the Ye family to end with Ye Qingxi's generation.
But his grandson fell in love with Ye Qingxi.
Ye Qingxi also fell in love with Qin Cheng.
There are millions of people in this world, men and women, but these two just happened to fall in love with each other.
If Qin Cheng were a girl, Mu Feng would not have any complaints.
He would smile happily and say, "Childhood sweethearts, a match made in heaven."
But Qin Cheng was a boy, a boy he had watched grow up.
Therefore, Mu Feng couldn't smile, and he couldn't agree to it right now.
“I don’t understand,” he said. “You didn’t grow up here. You grew up with your parents and watched them fall in love. Why would you fall for Xiaoxi?”
"Falling in love with... a boy?"
If it were someone else kneeling here today.
Anyone else, even Pei Liangkang and Cong, would be kicked out by Mu Feng without hesitation, and he would even sever all ties with Ye Qingxi.
Because he couldn't let the Ye family bloodline end.
He couldn't let Ye Min down.
I am sorry for the trust Ye Min placed in me on his deathbed.
But it was Qin Cheng.
He is his own grandson.
He was also a human being, an ordinary mortal in the world.
Qin Cheng is his own grandson; he couldn't possibly not care.
If possible, he also hopes that Qin Cheng's love life can be fulfilled.
But why Ye Qingxi?
There are so many people in this world; he could easily choose to like other people.
He wasn't someone who insisted on marrying someone of equal social standing. As long as Qin Cheng liked her, he could accept it even if she was completely mismatched with his family.
But why Ye Qingxi?
“Because feelings are never something that can be controlled by people.” Qin Cheng’s tone was sincere and honest. “Grandpa, I didn’t want to fall in love with any boy. I fell in love with Xiao Xi first, and then I started to like boys.”
"It has nothing to do with the surrounding environment, nothing to do with anyone else, it only has to do with Xiao Xi, simply because he is a boy."
That night, Mu Feng and Qin Cheng did not reach an agreement.
Mu Feng could neither change Qin Cheng's feelings nor agree to Qin Cheng's demands.
He leaned back in his chair, like a silent, cold sculpture.
In that instant, he felt as if he suddenly understood his father from back then.
At that time, he also disagreed with his love, and they were at an impasse, neither of them willing to compromise.
So Mu Feng told himself that when he became a father in the future, he would never imprison his children in terms of love and marriage.
He can express his dissatisfaction, disagreement, or lack of support, but he will not order them to separate.
He has always done it this way.
From Mu Zheng at the beginning to Mu Shaoyan later.
Each time, he only expressed his dissatisfaction, but he did not break them up.
But now, he wants to break them up.
Love is everyone's freedom.
In a marriage, the wishes of the parties involved should be respected throughout their lives.
Mu Feng knew very well; he had always understood.
But that night, he couldn't bring himself to say "I promise you."
His reason and emotions were constantly at odds.
Reason told him that he would eventually agree; Ye Qingxi and Qin Cheng liked each other, and they were both children he had watched grow up.
He knew very well how much Qin Cheng cared about Ye Qingxi, and he truly intended to treat her well for the rest of his life.
That way, even if he dies someday, he can rest in peace.
But the face of his old friend kept appearing before his eyes. The trust in his eyes when he looked at him, the pleading and expectation when he placed that small, tender hand in his own, made his reason retreat as quickly as a vine that couldn't bear the light.
All he could say was, "You should go back now."
These were the calmest words he could utter at that moment.
Qin Cheng nodded, not making things difficult for his grandfather.
He said, "Grandpa, I'm so sorry. I really, really, really didn't mean to put you in a difficult position, but I did the thing that put you in the most difficult position. I'm sorry."
Mu Feng didn't speak. He raised his hand and waved, signaling him to leave.
Qin Cheng stood up and silently withdrew.
Ye Qingxi was outside the door. When she saw him come out, she quickly went to his side.
"How is it?" he asked in a very soft voice.
Qin Cheng stared at him, feeling a mix of emotions.
He reached out and hugged him gently.
He was very upset.
If he could, he would rather bear all the guilt himself than let his grandfather, at his age, suffer the guilt towards his deceased friend.
“Grandpa is very upset,” he said truthfully. “He doesn’t want to let your grandpa down. He cares about your grandpa a lot, so he feels very guilty.”
Ye Qingxi knew it.
He hugged Qin Cheng, then let go of him, and whispered, "I'm going to see Grandpa."
Qin Cheng did not refuse.
The one who tied the knot must untie it.
He wasn't the one to tie the bell, so he was destined not to be the one who could unlock his grandfather's heart.
Only Ye Qingxi.
Only he can.
"I'll go back to my room and wait for you," Qin Cheng said.
Ye Qingxi shook her head.
He said, "Don't wait for me, I might stay with Grandpa tonight."
"That's fine then," Qin Cheng said.
With him by his side, his grandfather should feel a little better.
Ye Qingxi smiled, trying to put the person in front of her at ease, "So you don't need to worry, go back, I'll tell you the good news tomorrow."
"Okay." Qin Cheng smiled in response, trying to put his mind at ease.
He turned around and walked towards the stairwell.
After taking two more steps, he turned back reluctantly.
Ye Qingxi smiled at him, then walked to the door of Mu Feng's study.
He waved to Qin Cheng, who then turned his head away without delaying him any longer.
Ye Qingxi then took a deep breath and slowly knocked on the door.
"Enter."
Mu Feng's tone was as usual, showing no sign that he had just gone through a mental storm.
Ye Qingxi opened the door and went inside.
He closed the door, stood in the doorway, and quietly watched Mu Feng.
His gaze was clear and cold, as if covered by a layer of fresh rain, and his eyes were filled with an unconscious sadness.
"I'm sorry," he said softly.
He had wanted to say this for a long time.
A very, very long time ago, long before he decided to date Qin Cheng, long before he and Qin Cheng officially became a couple.
For Ye Qingxi, the biggest obstacle to being with Qin Cheng was never their identities, but Mu Feng.
It was the guilt that Mu Feng inevitably felt once they were together.
Ye Qingxi knew all too well Mu Feng's feelings for Ye Min, and how much he wanted to take good care of his old friend's child, to live up to the trust Ye Min had placed in him back then.
With such a heavy heart, how could he not feel guilty because he would never be able to have his own child again if he were with Qin Cheng?
So at the very beginning, Ye Qingxi did struggle and hesitate.
He even wanted to refuse.
But he didn't dare.
He feared that if Mu Feng found out that he had missed out on his own love in order to avoid making Mu Feng feel guilty, then Mu Feng's self-blame and pain would kill him more than his own guilt.
He was caught between the two, tossing and turning, unable to sleep all night.
"I'm sorry," Ye Qingxi said. "Grandpa, I'm so sorry."
Mu Feng was stunned.
He looked at the guilt in Ye Qingxi's eyes. He hadn't expected Ye Qingxi to say such a thing to him.
In that instant, he cast aside all his guilt and replaced it with love for the person before him.
"What have you done to wrong me?!" Mu Feng said angrily. "Ye Qingxi, have I never told you that you are my grandson, Mu Feng's grandson? You should get whatever you want! Anything you want in this world, you can take it, as long as your methods are legitimate and not illegal!"
"Now you're apologizing to me? Tell me why you're apologizing? What have you done to apologize to me for? It's just that you like men, right? So what? Your dad can like them, your uncle can like them, but you, Ye Qingxi, can't?!"
"Or is Qin Cheng something special that makes you want to say those three words to me here?!"
Upon hearing his words, Ye Qingxi's eyes immediately welled up with tears.
His grandfather is still thinking about him and wants to tell him that whatever he likes in this world is the most important thing.
And what about him?
What about him?
Ye Qingxi slowly approached him and stood in front of him.
He squatted down, sitting next to Mu Feng's legs.
He said, "Grandpa, I haven't forgotten. I remember everything you said."
"So I'm not apologizing to you because I like men, and even less because I like my brother."
"The one who hurts me, the one I feel sorry for, is not anyone else, it's you, only you."
"I don't want you to feel guilty. I know you will feel guilty, but I still made you feel guilty."
"Grandpa, I'm so sorry."
"I really, really, really don't want you to feel guilty or sorry for my grandfather because of me."
Ye Qingxi's tears fell, streaming down her cheeks and onto Mu Feng's outstretched hand that was stroking her face.
He felt the burning heat of Ye Qingxi's tears.
It looks like a drop of lava.
It also resembles a piece of frost.
His palms felt hot from the heat, yet also strangely cold.
Mu Feng raised his thumb and gently wiped away the tears from his eyes.
Ye Qingxi grabbed his hand, pressed her face against his hand, and tears streamed down her face uncontrollably.
At this moment, he was like a child again, Mu Feng thought, like a fledgling bird that couldn't fly yet and could only rely on the elders in the family.
Like when he was a child, when he was still very young, so she always clung to him and snuggled close to him.
"Do you know what made me happiest tonight?"
Ye Qingxi shook her head.
He looked up at him, puzzled, his eyes filled with tears.
Looking into his clear, beautiful eyes brimming with tears, Mu Feng smiled for the first time that night.
He said, "You knew I would feel guilty, yet you still didn't give up on your feelings for him."
“Xiao Xi,” Mu Feng’s thumb rubbed his lower eyelid, “If you deceive your own heart and reject him because of my guilt, I will be very angry, very sad, very guilty, and even very confused.”
"Is my behavior not obvious enough? Is my love for you not enough? So you clearly want it, but you give up easily just because I would feel guilty, making yourself unhappy."
"You know, all I've ever wanted is for you to live a proud and happy life, like your father and your uncle. Don't they know that I'd be unhappy if I were with a man?"
"Of course they know, but they understand even better that a father will always care more about his children's lives, their joy and happiness. They also know that a person lives not only for others, but also for themselves. So they are my children, and they are also themselves. If they want something, they can boldly go for it, even if I am dissatisfied with it."
"This is what a father would want to see."
"This is what I want to see."
"Xiao Xi, I'm so glad I didn't become an obstacle in your love life."
“You’ve always cared about me a lot since you were little, so when you were very young I told myself that when you grow up, no matter which girl you like, I will say yes.”
“Because your uncle or your younger uncle won’t stop loving each other or marrying each other just because I don’t agree, but you will,” Mu Feng said gently. “You definitely will.”
"Therefore, I absolutely do not want to be an obstacle to your love or marriage."
"I want you to live a life of freedom and happiness."
"Even now, I still think this way."
“I can’t agree to Qin Cheng’s request because I feel I would be letting your grandfather down.”
"But I have no choice but to agree, because I love you more than your grandfather."
"If you are unhappy in your later years, what's the point of having a prosperous Ye family with many children and grandchildren?"
They were all just people who had nothing to do with him.
Neither of them is Ye Qingxi.
Neither of them were the child he loved.
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
