Chapter 50
But, no.
Lin Wan's inner sense of morality kept her in check, and her trembling raised fingertips fell down dejectedly.
Chen Yu's appearance was undoubtedly impeccably beautiful. Her cold white skin almost glowed under the light, and even her slight glance carried a thrilling quality.
Such an appearance will undoubtedly create a huge visual impact when it appears on the big screen.
A film critic once wrote a review that went viral, describing his eyes in the movie.
[When those eyes look at you, there is no emotion, like a god looking down on all living things.]
This statement always seems to be an exaggeration.
Lin Wan had never seen the literary and artistic film that was regarded as a masterpiece by countless people, but when it came to eyes, Lin Wan could always think of Chen Yu's eyes when the two of them first met many years ago.
He is full of aggression, but hidden under his calm eyes. On the surface, he is a well-behaved child.
It's completely different from now, but Lin Wan doesn't know where this change started.
She focused most of her attention on herself. During her short adolescence, Lin Wan seldom paid attention to her nominal younger brother.
Lin Wan belatedly realized that she had missed a lot in that year when the light and shadow changed so rapidly.
Chen Yu's hands were slightly cold as he stroked Lin Wan's face.
"Sister, you are so beautiful."
Lin Wan's cheeks seemed to be pinched. She glanced down, her thoughts a little confused. But she could no longer feel it.
Although she tried hard to hold on, her eyelids continued to droop, and she was already halfway to the edge of sleep.
Lin Wan stared at Chen Yu's eyes, but she didn't understand the motive behind her behavior.
Is it nervousness, fear, or some other emotion?
She fell into a coma without seeing the doctor coming.
To ensure Lin Wan remained motionless, Tang Wanlin injected the entire syringe of medicine into her. The drug slowly released into her body, and it was a real achievement for her to have endured until this moment.
Lin Wan's last memory was a hug.
Chen Yu leaned over and hugged her.
His embrace was very light, and for Lin Wan at that time, such an embrace was almost unnoticeable.
She could only smell something, the scent of flowers.
——It was the one Lin Wan often used a few years ago.
He asked her quietly in her ear.
"Sister, will you leave this time?"
Unfortunately, Lin Wan no longer had the ability to answer at that time.
That sentence kept playing in Lin Wan's mind, gradually being stretched out and becoming hoarse, like a radio that was about to break down, speaking these words in a stuck manner.
Fragments of memory came with the wind of the past, and unexpectedly, Lin Wan touched a corner of the past in the infinite darkness.
Things that seemed to have never existed in her past memories but existed in reality.
During high school, Chen Yu was extremely popular in Jiangzhong.
Outstanding appearance, excellent competition results, everything is given a hazy and brilliant filter when passed on by word of mouth among young teenagers with surging hormones.
Even Lin Wan, who knew little about school gossip, knew that someone had specially created a fan group for Chen Yu, saying that once Chen Yu became famous, this would be the superstar's first official fan group.
And this sentence accidentally came true many years later.
So when Lin Wan, a senior in high school, met Chen Yu on campus, he was always surrounded by a group of brothers, looking very impressive.
Lin Wan didn't know whether the so-called brothers around him were sincere, but it was undoubtedly a shock to her who was alone at the time.
In the past, she would always greet Chen Yu, even if it would attract strange looks from students passing by, she didn't care.
Lin Wan is the top student in her grade, and such a score is enough to prove her own worth. She does not need to seek so-called recognition through other means.
But Lin Wan, who is not the top student in the grade, cannot find her own value.
What does Lin Wan have left after losing his good grades?
After the exercise paper incident, Lin Wan not only became invisible in the class, but was even avoided by others.
As soon as the classmates saw him, they had to do two things: first, take a detour; second, cover their faces with their hands and whisper to each other.
Lin Wan really couldn't stand the strange atmosphere in the class, so most of the time when she needed to be alone in the class, she would choose to go to the rooftop of the office building.
The rooftop sounds romantic and rarely visited, but it is a wasteland where snakes, rats, insects and ants gather, and still needs human development.
The cement floor had long since lost its original color, stained into a grayish mottled hue by time, rain, and sunlight. Plants grew wildly from the cracks between the stones, and moss covered the damp areas wantonly.
It rains a lot in Jiangcheng in autumn, and the whole city is shrouded in hazy rain.
Lin Wan climbed up to the rooftop with a book in his arms. Standing here, the hustle and bustle of the city was pushed away, becoming a dull background bass.
When she climbed the last set of stairs and pushed open the old door.
At that moment, she was closer to the sky than ever before, and farther away from human habitation than ever before.
——A huge, gentle sense of desolation enveloped her. It did not make people afraid, but only made them feel an eternal silence.
This place seems like an isolated island at the end of the world
Lin Wan likes to do some science problems here. She likes to look at the graffiti fragments still left on the wall in her spare time, which no one can understand.
Through those, she seemed to see the gentle soul of another person.
But the encounter that day seemed to give the rooftop a different meaning.
She saw Chen Yu, or to be more precise, Chen Yu who was confessing his love to a girl.
What was even more coincidental was that the girl Lin Wan, to whom Chen Yu confessed his love, happened to know her and was in the same class with her.
The tip of his nose wafted the stench of rusty metal and the coolness left after the evaporation of rainwater. Lin Wan stood there, his drooping eyelashes flickering constantly.
She didn't want to go back to the classroom and face her classmates' gazes, nor did she want to watch a bad idol drama scene here.
"Student Chen, that letter...was it you who wrote it to me?"
The female voice was soft and polite with obvious shyness.
Lin Wan stood at the corner holding a book. She could almost imagine Qiu Siqi clenching her hands and tapping the wet cement floor with her toes.
——The cute look of the little girl.
Lin Wan didn't know that Qiu Siqi also had this side to her. She thought she always looked resentful when facing her.
No one answered.
From Lin Wan's angle, he could see his figure standing casually with his hands in his pockets, wearing a gray school uniform jacket. Behind him was the gray, overcast sky and the railings rusted by rain.
Chen Yu reached out and pinched the back of his neck, then took two steps forward, completely out of Lin Wan's sight.
Lin Wan stood still, her grip on her schoolbag tightening, but she didn't move forward. She wanted to turn around, but some force held her still, and she tormented herself, wanting to hear the whole city.
"certainly."
Chen Yu's voice sounded not far away, natural and even very familiar.
Lin Wan's fingertips curled up, feeling an unknown tension.
It was obvious that they would become a couple, and Lin Wan didn't know what he was struggling with.
"So, what do you want to talk to me about?" Qiu Siqi's voice sounded, and her tone was obviously softer than a girl's.
Lin Wan stopped where he was, expressionlessly imagining her using her fingers to circle the hair hanging by her ears, a blush evident on her face.
If Lin Wan could have seen Chen Yu's eyes at that moment, she would have been shocked by the coldness and sharpness in them. Those were definitely not the eyes of a boy in love. The mockery and teasing in them were enough to make people feel terrified.
Chen Yu's confession was filled with malicious intent.
Lin Wan, who was a few meters away, was breathing rapidly, and the collar of his shirt kept rising and falling.
At that moment, she felt that she was actually vicious. She did not hesitate to use the worst attitude to imagine what a girl would look like when she first fell in love.
The moment she realized this, Lin Wan's hands holding the book finally relaxed. She closed her eyes for three seconds, and finally returned the same way she had come, holding the book.
At that moment, the rooftop no longer seemed as sacred as it used to be.
Memories jump rapidly, quickly moving backward along the timeline.
During that period, Lin Wan began to childishly dislike Chen Yu. She knew that this behavior was irrational and even extremely unfair to Chen Yu.
But her inner emotions were boiling, and she really couldn't control her emotions.
Chen Yu's attitude towards Lin Wan remained the same as before, and his intimate actions were even more intense.
"Uncle Jiang, I will go to school earlier starting tomorrow."
In the car on Monday morning, Lin Wan said this very naturally, with a righteous and self-righteous look, but his fingers curled up unconsciously, even deeply embedded in his palms.
She has been acting a little strange lately, always inexplicably nervous and her heartbeat is completely out of control.
Uncle Jiang was obviously a little surprised. He turned a corner skillfully and asked with a smile, "What? Did you have a fight with your brother?"
It was just a normal teasing. According to Lin Wan's usual personality, he would definitely go along with what he said, at least it would not make the whole atmosphere dull.
But this time Lin Wan didn't. She sat quietly in her seat, without saying a word or even raising her head.
Uncle Jiang waited for a long time without receiving a response, and was obviously a little embarrassed. He reached out and touched his nose, and laughed dryly twice: "Miss, if you want to go to school early, that's fine."
Lin Wan sat with his head lowered, pretending to be mesmerized by the words in front of him, as if the book was the only thing on his mind.
A voice in her heart told her that she needed to say something to ease the poor communication situation, but Lin Wan did not do so.
"Okay." She responded coldly.
She noticed Chen Yu looking at her. It was an inquiring look, wrapped in a gentle look.
He seemed to be in a very good mood recently. Whenever Lin Wan happened to look at Chen Yu, there was always a smile on his face.
It's not something that's deliberately done to please others, but rather an attitude that carries pride and even seeks credit.
Lin Wan went to school early, and Chen Yu followed suit. When he went early, everyone in the school followed his lead and went to school early, causing a wave of early risers.
Lin Wan would still go to the rooftop to do her science homework, but she no longer had that kind of pilgrimage piety in her heart. The only meaning of going there was to escape, and she could get away from everyone and take a deep breath.
She was like a child about to drown in a blue pool in summer. She seemed to be surrounded by people, but when she opened her eyes, there was no one there.
The sunshine before my eyes is trying to ignite everything brilliantly.
Chen Yu began to look for Lin Wan at home frequently.
"Sister, Aunt Chen asked me to bring you some hot milk."
There was a knock on the solid wooden door, and Chen Yu's voice sounded outside the door, with a kind of empty gentleness.
It seems like dust suspended in a vacuum, with no emotion to be heard.
Lin Wan thought that Chen Yu was not in a good mood at the moment. But she remained silent, letting the black pen in her hand leave large blotches of ink on the paper.
She didn't like Chen Yu like this, nor did she like herself like this.
Lin Wan didn't know what was wrong with him.
It was already late autumn, and she was silent for a long time. Chen Yu outside the door did not urge her.
"Come in," she said.
His voice was tinged with emotions that he himself did not quite understand.
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