Chapter 853 I'll teach you the code
The old lady explained to Xiao Peng, "Xiao, it's actually very difficult for us to distinguish you East Asians. We can't tell whether you're Chinese, Japanese, or just Chinese. Many businesses on the island now offer preferential policies for Chinese tourists, such as discounts on purchases. They can't fool you if it's a hotel discount, but it's hard to tell if it's other purchases. The discounts we give to Chinese people here are very high, which is really embarrassing for us."
Xiao Peng grinned after hearing this: "Yeah, you can run into mean people wherever you go."
The old lady was stunned: "Xiao, why don't you look weird?"
Xiao Peng spread his hands and said, "This kind of thing is quite normal. People from these two countries are good at doing this kind of thing. Some time ago, two Chinese girls who stole their country did something wrong in Thailand and lied that they were Chinese. As a result, they were seen by a Chinese person at the scene. Not only did he expose them, but he also recorded a video of them saying in Chinese: Hello, you are so ugly. As a result, the Chinese girl expressed her gratitude. This kind of thing has happened more than once or twice."
"A lot?" The old lady was stunned.
Xiao Peng nodded and said, "For example, everyone knows that our country and Pakistan are very close. A few years ago, a Japanese guy had a 'genius' idea. He took a Chinese flag and used his Asian face to pretend to be Chinese to travel to Pakistan. When he arrived in Pakistan, he was surprised to find that the Pakistani people were very kind to Chinese people. Many restaurants thought he was Chinese and refused to charge him for meals. He was even able to take photos at the local police station without any hesitation, and he was protected by local Pakistanis when he went out. Don't you think his actions were despicable? He even posted it online, and people scolded him - Japanese people are like this. Don't worry about whether they learn it behind their backs. When they encounter such things, they always pretend to be moral gentlemen and scold them first. As a result, it was the Chinese who learned and promoted his technique. Many Pakistani shops have encountered Chinese thieves pretending to be Chinese and cheating them out of food and drinks."
The old lady asked puzzledly: "And then?"
"And then?" Xiao Peng explained, "The merchants in Pakistan have also figured out how to spot the fakes: because the Chinese always wear a family-like smile when they arrive, and the Chinese believe in reciprocity. Those who refuse to pay, like this, usually insist on paying, and there's always a lot of back-and-forth. Even a discount makes the Chinese feel embarrassed. And those who shamelessly ask the boss for a free meal are the ones who are thieves. The average monthly income in Pakistan is only 150 euros, yet those thieves are willing to give up their country for a bargain worth less than half a euro. Tsk tsk. Only they can do such a thing."
The old lady hurriedly said, "Yes, yes, yes. When I offer gooseberries to Chinese tourists who come here, they always refuse and insist on paying for them. But some even come right up and ask for them."
"That must be stealing from our country!" Xiao Peng answered without thinking.
After hearing this, the old lady said dejectedly, "But this is too difficult to tell!"
Xiao Peng suddenly smiled wickedly and said, "I'll teach you something. If someone comes here in the future, you can tell if they're Chinese or not by saying this to them!"
"What?" the old lady looked excited.
Xiao Peng said, "When you meet them, just say, 'I bought a watch last year' and see how they react."
After hearing this, the old lady said, "That's a long sentence. Is there a simpler one?"
"Then you can just smile and say 'alpaca' to them!" Xiao Peng said.
The old lady was so excited after hearing this: "This is easy! What does this mean?"
"Dirty words!" Xiao Peng said, "You must remember to say them with a smile. If someone is angry with you, they are Chinese, and if someone is smiling at you, they are just pretending!"
The old lady almost burst into tears after hearing this. She was considering whether to beat Xiao Peng first. Oh, the Chinese guests came and you want me to scold them first? You are trying to trick me, right? What evil have your compatriots done to deserve this?
Tierti couldn't stand it any longer: "Xiao! You're going too far. What kind of crap are you teaching me?"
However, Xiao Peng confidently said, "My habit is to learn the local swear words when I arrive in a strange place, so that I don't think that people will praise me when they curse me with a smile! If the old lady said this to them with a smile, they would definitely be angry if they were not Chinese and did not understand. If they were pretending and thought that it was a compliment, they would definitely smile at them stupidly!"
"This method is too dirty!" Tiltie said, "Let's try another one."
"How about another way?" Xiao Peng slapped his forehead. "I've got an idea! Come on! No matter who comes, just greet them with one sentence. It definitely can't be a swear word!"
"What?" The old lady looked at Xiao Peng with distrust in her eyes.
Xiao Peng grinned. "Just ask them: Which company has the best excavator technology? That's the code! If they answer 'Huaxia, Shandong, look for Lanxiang,' then they're one of us... Well, if someone answers 'The boss is about to curse,' then that's also acceptable."
The old lady was dumbfounded. "Xiao, this is too long, isn't it? How do you expect me to learn it?"
Xiao Peng waved his hand. "Here, give me your phone. I'll record it for you. Next time someone comes over, just play it for them. There are a lot of codewords like this. For example, if you ask 'Palace Jade Liquor', a Chinese person would definitely answer 'one hundred and eighty per cup'. Tsk tsk, old lady Zhao Lirong definitely didn't expect she could still make a contribution after all these years. Or ask who said 'I miss you guys so much'? Hmm, or ask them where Guangzhou people like to eat the most. Hu Jian is the correct answer."
The old lady's hands trembled after hearing this: "Xiao, I know you Chinese people dare to eat anything, but why do you eat people?"
Xiao Peng was stunned after hearing this, then burst into laughter: "We Chinese don't eat people! This is a joke that all Chinese people know."
Tierti said, "I know you have a Fujian Province in China, but where is this 'Hu Jian'?"
Xiao Peng laughed and said, "'Hu Jian' means Fujian. It's a joke about the Fujianese people's non-standard Mandarin. They tend to pronounce the 'f' sound as 'h', but they won't pronounce 'h' as 'f'. You have to believe me, Fujianese people speak very beautifully. I'll take you to Huaxia to experience it later! Let me tell you this, Fujianese is a 'living fossil' in our country. It is the earliest language form left over from the Chinese language. Our current Chinese language has developed from the language there. They still have many dialects that retain the characteristics of ancient Chinese, such as 'you' is called 'ru', 'he' is called 'yi', 'eat' is called 'shi', 'walk' is called 'xing' and so on. If you want to understand ancient Chinese, you can't go wrong to study in Fujian! That's the ancestor of Chinese! What were we talking about? Yes, give me your phone, I'll record the code for you!"
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