"You're the idiot, your whole family are idiots!" Luo Shimiao retorted, hands on her hips.
Little Green: "Idiot, big-breasted idiot with no brains!"
"You're the one who's an idiot, you stupid bird."
Little Green disagreed and changed its tune: "What the f*#*....."
Luo Shimiao scoffed softly, "FxxK........"
A man and a bird, separated by a net, were exchanging insults in different languages, giving the staff a headache. They tried to stop them, but the man and bird, engrossed in their argument, completely ignored them.
Little Green was no longer as elegant as before; its feathers were all ruffled, and many feathers had fallen to the ground.
Luo Shimiao took a breath: "Why isn't that silly bird cursing anymore? Come on, I've never been afraid of anyone when it comes to arguing!"
Pointing at Gu Nian, she asked, "Do you like him?"
Little Green's small eyes widened: "What's it to you? Are you the Pacific Police? Why are you meddling in other people's business?"
Luo Shimiao said, "I won't care about you, I'll only make you angry!"
After saying that, she stood on tiptoe and kissed Gu Nian on the cheek: "This is my man. I can look at him, kiss him, touch him, and sleep with him. Can you do that? You can only stay inside and grow old alone. You don't think some bird would want to be with a silly bird like you, do you? No way, no way!"
Gu Nian raised an eyebrow. "Can he sleep?" A deep look flashed in his eyes; he was very much looking forward to it.
Little Green pointed at Luo Shimiao with its wings, closed its eyes, and its small body fell from mid-air like a kite with a broken string.
Luo Shimiao took a step back, covered her mouth, and looked at the staff member: "Are you trying to scam me? Or are you just furious?"
The staff member opened the cage with a key, picked up Xiao Lü, and touched its neck: "It's okay, it just fainted. You touched a sore spot. It has been in our park for 5 years and is still single."
"Pfft~" Luo Shimiao couldn't help but laugh out loud, then suddenly remembered that she had been so busy arguing that she forgot to take pictures.
Finally, the staff held the unconscious parrot and let them take a group photo.
Live stream chat, bullet comments.
—【OMG! What kind of fan did I become a fan of? It's one thing to argue with people, but to argue with birds too!】
—[I laughed so hard I squealed like a pig. My mom thought I'd gone crazy and wanted to send me to a mental hospital.]
— [It's not exactly something to be proud of, but it's so damn funny, hahaha, I need a break, hahaha.]
—[Am I the only one who noticed Luo Shimiao's terrifying language talent? I've summed it up, and she just spoke a total of eight foreign languages!]
—[She might just happen to know a few swear words; if she's fluent, then this woman is truly terrifying!]
I only stayed in the snake cave for a few minutes, but I spent a full hour with the parrots.
Seeing Xiao Lü slowly wake up, Luo Shimiao tossed her a bag of nuts, but said sarcastically, "So fragile, you're easily hurt!"
Little Green was about to retort when its small eyes spotted its favorite nut. It pounced on it, hugged it, and proudly declared, "I am the noblest and smartest bird in the world. I won't hold it against you; I forgive you."
"Tch, who needs your forgiveness? Let's go, you stupid bird." With that, she pulled Gu Nian out of the birdcage and headed to the next stop.
Gu Nian chuckled as he looked at the girl with a sharp tongue but a kind heart, ruffled her hair, and lowered his eyes, which were full of tenderness.
There were quite a few monkeys, so the two of them bought some bananas on their way here.
"Little monkeys, here we come!" Luo Shimiao tossed a handful of bananas into the enclosure.
The monkeys that were resting on the artificial hill all excitedly ran over.
"Don't fight over them, they're all free!" Luo Shimiao thought they were excited because of the bananas, but to his surprise, the monkeys simply walked past the bananas without even glancing at them.
She climbed over the railing and rushed towards Luo Shimiao, her eyes filled with the look of someone who had been separated from her for many years.
Luo Shimiao didn't sense any malice and stood still, but she underestimated the monkeys' enthusiasm. In just a few dozen seconds, she was covered in monkeys.
One monkey was perched on my head, four others were standing on my shoulders, and my arms, chest, back, and thighs were covered with monkeys.
"Chirp chirp chirp"
A dozen monkeys chirped in her ear at the same time. Luo Shimiao felt like her head was about to explode. No matter how she spun and jumped, not a single monkey was thrown off. They clung to her like octopuses.
The monkeys that couldn't climb up could only watch their companions with envy.
Suddenly, a peeled banana was offered to Luo Shimiao's mouth. Turning his head, he saw a monkey on his right shoulder.
This banana is not the same variety as the one they bought; it must have been given to them by other tourists.
Luo Shimiao said expressionlessly, "I won't eat it, you eat it yourself."
Seeing that she wasn't eating, the monkey simply shoved the food into her mouth.
Luo Shimiao took a breath, closed her eyes, opened her mouth, and took a big bite.
As soon as Luo Shimiao finished eating, the monkey fed him again, until he finished the banana.
"After you've finished eating, can you get off me?" Luo Shimiao said through gritted teeth.
Not only are her ears bulging now, but she also looks like she's carrying a Silver Horned King on her back!
Live stream chat, bullet comments.
—[It's confirmed! Luo Shimiao is indeed a monkey spirit who has cultivated for a thousand years and transformed into human form.]
—[Hahaha, this is hilarious! A massive family reunion scene!]
—【Jiu Min, Jiu Min, I laughed so hard my stomach hurt! How can there be such a funny entertainer? Even comedies aren't as funny as her!】
Luo Shimiao looked helplessly at Gu Nian, her lips slightly pouting: "Gu Nian, help me~"
The staff members, recovering from their shock, circled around Luo Shimiao, saying, "Wow, what a spectacle! I've worked at the zoo for 10 years and I've never seen a monkey be so enthusiastic towards any visitor. You're the first!"
Gu Nian walked over coldly and peeled the monkeys off Luo Shimiao one by one. The monkeys seemed to be afraid of Gu Nian and did not resist.
After being abandoned, she sat on the ground looking at Luo Shimiao with a wronged expression, like a child abandoned by her mother.
After the last monkey was pulled off, Luo Shimiao, fearing they would climb back up, used her toes to propel herself onto Gu Nian, tightly hugging his neck and watching the surrounding monkeys with a wary expression.
Luo Shimiao had a monkey hanging on him, and Gu Nian had a person hanging on him.
"Big brother, quickly take a picture for us!" Luo Shimiao handed his phone to the staff member.
"Click click click"
In the photo, Luo Shimiao is hanging on Gu Nian, with a group of monkeys standing behind them.
Having successfully taken the photo, Luo Shimiao urged, "Gu Nian, hurry up and let's go!"
The monkeys wanted to follow, but they were afraid of Gu Nian, and were eventually persuaded to return to the artificial hill by the staff who came over.
On the tour bus, Gu Nian carefully helped Luo Shimiao remove the monkey hair from her clothes.
Luo Shimiao slumped into her chair: "I'm not their mother, why are you being so enthusiastic?"
"That's possible."
Seeing the smile in the man's eyes, Luo Shimiao slapped the back of his hand: "Don't learn bad things from netizens. Don't think I don't know, they say online that I'm a monkey spirit who has cultivated for a thousand years."
Gu Nian flipped his hand over and took the girl's delicate little hand in his.
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