Chapter 6
Li Qingyao was holding some clean clothes and was about to take a shower when someone knocked on the door. She looked through the peephole and opened the door.
Under the snow-white light of the corridor, Luo Huaizheng looked up at her with a mysterious and complicated look in his eyes.
"Can I come in and sit down?"
Li Qingyao didn't move for a moment: "Anything else?"
“For me, it’s very important.”
Li Qingyao said "OK" and took a pair of men's slippers from the shoe cabinet and gave them to him. ┅
"Please sit down first. I'll go get some tea."
"No."
"It's okay, it will be ready soon. My tea is good." Li Qingyao went to the kitchen to get the tea set.
When Luo Huaizheng walked into the living room, his first impression was that it was simple.
One bedroom and two living rooms, the total area should not exceed 70 square meters. The decoration is very simple, with only a few pieces of furniture. Although the house is tidy and spotless, with simple curtains, cartoon ornaments, and a few flowers in the vase, revealing the little romance of a woman living alone - but overall, the house still looks very old and simple.
While in prison, Luo Huaizheng once imagined what kind of life Li Qingyao would live after graduating from university. With her abilities and personality, in addition to getting a decent job, she will surely live a refined and comfortable life. She would be like the senior white-collar workers in TV dramas, renting a well-decorated apartment in the city center, wearing branded clothes, high heels, light makeup, elegant temperament, and everyone she went in and out was of the same kind.
Instead of being like now, wearing a half-worn white T-shirt and black shorts, living in the most dilapidated and poorest resettlement community in the city, with no elevator, a narrow and old house, and no makeup all day long, exposed to the wind and sun. These days, he even accidentally saw calluses on her palms.
Luo Huaizheng could probably guess why it was. He had heard about her brother's disappearance before, and these days he also heard from the people in the second team that the person disappeared in Chaoyang Home. However, Luo Huaizheng only knew that his brother disappeared due to investigation of a case, but no one would tell him what the case was.
Therefore, a girl who was once the most gentle and delicate now lives in such a hard and rough environment. She was so out of tune with all this, yet strangely integrated into it all.
Luo Huaizheng looked at the house where she lived, and at the figure in the kitchen who was busy making tea. Before knocking on the door, the worries that had filled his mind suddenly faded a little.
In front of what she has to do, in front of the beliefs and emotions she carries, love seems a little insignificant.
Li Qingyao returned to the living room carrying the tea table. It was a set of small dark grey teapots, delicate and small, and looked like something she would like. She took two teacups of the same color, but the size of a tiger's mouth, poured two cups, and placed the first cup in front of him.
"Thanks."
"Try it."
Luo Huaizheng picked it up, blew on it, and took a sip. It was indeed fragrant and sweet with a mellow taste. This tea was definitely not cheap.
"Good tea," he praised.
Li Qingyao picked up another cup and smiled slightly.
Luo Huaizheng put down his teacup and asked, "Excuse me, how is your brother's case going?"
Li Qingyao shook her head: "Still looking." As the details involved the case, she naturally couldn't say more.
"Although I may not be able to help you much, if you need me in the future, please feel free to ask."
"Okay, thank you."
The two of them were silent for a moment.
The sofa in Li Qingyao's house is relatively low, which is her favorite height, suitable for curling up or rolling directly to the ground to sit down. Luo Huaizheng looked awkward sitting on it. He hunched his back slightly, with his long legs stretched out to the side of the coffee table. He stared at the tea set on the table and said nothing for a while. Li Qingyao just held the teacup and lowered his head, waiting.
"In fact, I already have the answer to the question you asked just now." Luo Huaizheng looked up at her, "In my life, I still want to engage in academic research. I started a business before not because I like it, but at that time, I had no other goals except survival, and it was impossible for me to have one. If I can go to Tsinghua University, I will definitely strive to study in depth, complete my undergraduate studies, and then study for a master's and doctoral degree. In the future, if I can stay in a university as a small researcher or lecturer, even if I can't become a great scholar and don't make much money, I will be very happy. I like that kind of life."
Li Qingyao's heart softened when he heard this, and there was a hint of bitterness in his eyes. He said, "That's great, really."
Luo Huaizheng smiled at her, his eyes resting on her face, as if he wanted to look into the depths of her soul. He said: "But I'm telling you I haven't made up my mind yet. I really haven't made up my mind yet."
"Why?"
He suddenly stopped looking at her and turned to stare at the other side, revealing a straight neck line. He said: "In the first few years, I often missed you. Thinking about the time we spent together, although it was short, it was very happy. I have never been so happy in my life. Sometimes I always thought I was dreaming, and when I woke up, I could go back to school, sit next to you, and go to BJ with you. Sometimes, I couldn't bear it anymore, and I hoped every day that you would change your mind and come to see me. If I had your support, I think I would be much better. Because what you mean to me is different from what my parents and other people mean to me.
But later, I adapted to prison life, accepted reality, calmed down, and felt that it was right for you not to come. Because it is impossible for us to be together, if you don't come, you won't give me false hope, and you will make me accept the reality faster and adapt to the new life instead of living in a fragile dream. This way, it's good for both you and me. ”
Li Qingyao's tears fell without warning.
"I'm sorry." She uttered the three words with great difficulty.
Luo Huaizheng stared at the empty ground, but a smile appeared on his face. It was a truly generous and gentle smile. He said, "You don't have to apologize. I don't blame you. Every word I said was from my heart. If I still wanted to selfishly keep you under such circumstances, would I still be a human being?"
Li Qingyao turned her head and looked at the dark night outside the window. The clouds were very thick tonight, layer upon layer, and no starlight could be seen. However, her heart felt an unprecedented silence.
Luo Huaizheng slowly recounted the past, which was also the real purpose of his visit today. When those words came out of his heart, he seemed to be able to feel his flesh and blood beating alive.
He reached out and poured himself another cup of tea, drank it in one gulp, put down the cup, clasped his slender fingers together, and squeezed them several times before saying, "What I really want to say is that after meeting you again, I can't tell whether my feelings for you are love or longing. I always want to see you, but I'm afraid to see you. I'm worried that you're different from before, and I'm afraid that you're the same as before. Later, I gradually realized that it's not important to distinguish these. Love in the world has many forms, many reasons and results. What's important is that for me, has this love, this longing ever stopped?"
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