Chapter 37 I'm really happy to see you.
Yu Xue didn't leave immediately. She turned to the driver and said, "Excuse me, please wait for me."
She got out of the car and walked towards the company building. She stood in front of the elevator and was about to press the up button when she suddenly realized that the elevator was moving.
It was pitch black all around, and she was afraid of scaring Wen Feng, so she walked to the wall and turned on the light.
Before long, the elevator arrived. Wen Feng walked out with his head down. He was a little surprised to see the lights on. He looked up and met Yu Xue's gaze. She was standing in the corner, her eyes overflowing with heartache.
They took two steps toward each other and spoke at the same time:
"You haven't eaten yet, have you?"
"Did you have meal?"
Wen Feng grabbed her hand. "Why is it so cold?"
Her gaze remained fixed on Wen Feng's reddened eyes, knowing he had been crying.
Yu Xue: "It's not even eight o'clock yet, we can still get a taxi. I'll tell the driver to go back, let's go out to eat."
Wen Feng: "Okay."
Yu Xue took out her phone and sent a message to the driver, casually saying, "Let's find another driver, one for the day shift and one for the night shift. I'm worried about you working so late all the time."
Wen Feng had just lied to her, and fearing she would question him, he kept his head down, not daring to look at her.
After a while, fearing that Yu Xue might misunderstand, he explained, "It's not that I don't want to go home, it's that I'm afraid of bringing my negative emotions to you."
As Yu Xue turned off the lights and walked out, she said, "So you want to get down now, drive fast, take a shortcut, and get home before the driver? Aren't you afraid something will happen? You're not afraid, but I am. Luckily, I came in and took a look."
She suddenly stopped and turned around to look at Wen Feng. She stood in front of him, so close that she was almost touching his chest. "What do you take me for?"
Such accusations were too heavy and too profound, and Wen Feng subconsciously took a step back.
Yu Xue pressed on, grabbing his sleeve and looking into his eyes. "I love you, I consider you my husband, but do you consider me your wife? You said before that we should rely on each other, that you would tell me about my sadness off-screen, and that you would tell me about your troubles in life. Was it all a lie? You only want me to rely on you, but you don't want to rely on me, or do you think I'm completely unreliable?"
“No!” Wen Feng immediately denied. “You are sick now, your father is sick, and you are sad. You already have a heavy emotional burden, and I don’t want to add any more pressure to you.”
"Don't you have a heavy emotional burden?" Yu Xue questioned. "Oh, I forgot, a lot of your emotional burden was brought to you by me..."
After she finished speaking, her face darkened, she turned away dejectedly, and continued walking forward.
Wen Feng caught up with her and grabbed her hand. "No, Yu Xue, I'm happy to be able to take care of you. The fact that you're willing to come out of the room and talk to me has already relieved a lot of my emotional pain. I'm so glad to have you by my side."
Yu Xue listened intently to him, not wanting him to see her bad mood. She forced a smile and replied, "Really? That's good. I just hope we can be honest with each other. Actually, your existence has alleviated a lot of my pain. Without you, I might not have chosen to stay in this world. You helped me, and I want to help you too. Wen Feng, let's be honest, okay?"
Wen Feng closed his eyes, nodded, and said, "I am indeed in a bad mood. I have been very sad ever since I received that news."
He turned his back and wiped away his tears with his thumb. "The thought that I might not have a father anymore, and the thought that one day my mother might be gone too, makes me so sad..."
He didn't know how to express his emotions. Even the breath he exhaled hurt, but he couldn't say anything except that he was sad.
Yu Xue hugged his arm and wiped away her tears with his sleeve.
She didn't know what to say except to hug him.
Perhaps she could say that everyone has to go through these things; parents will grow old and pass away, but fortunately, we still have each other to accompany us.
But she also felt that these words were too light, as if the passing of her parents was just a casual remark. Her presence could only alleviate his pain, but not stop it.
The thought of these things pained her, so much so that she wanted to cry.
It wasn't just the pain of hearing about Feng's father that caused him pain, but also the hatred he felt for himself.
She hated her own incompetence, hated her illness, hated that she couldn't contribute to the family, and even in this situation, she still needed Wen Feng and Liu Xin to take care of her emotions.
She didn't know what to do, she didn't know what she could do.
She knew that these were things she could only process and ponder on her own, and she couldn't actually say them out loud.
But she was so sad that she couldn't speak.
Let's just hold each other and cry for a while.
Wen Feng bent down and buried his head in her shoulder. She stood on tiptoe and buried her head in Wen Feng's neck. The two of them nestled together in the darkness, sobbing and patting each other's backs to comfort each other.
Two minutes later, Wen Feng's emotions calmed down a bit. He straightened up, took Yu Xue's hand, and said, "Let's go eat."
Yu Xue's tiptoe was starting to give way, so she nodded and followed Wen Feng, leaning half of her body against him and holding his arm with her other hand as they walked out together.
The two of them ate a bowl of wontons at a noodle shop near the company.
Worried that Yu Xue might not have enough to eat, Wen Feng ordered her a plate of fried pancakes as well.
He remembered Yu Xue saying that if he didn't eat breakfast or lunch, he would eat more for dinner.
Yu Xue: "Actually, I really want to eat it, but I'm afraid I won't be able to finish it."
Wen Feng: "Then let's order a small portion, so we can eat together."
Yu Xue: "Okay."
The two found a corner to sit down, and Wen Feng said, "My dad can also make wontons."
Yu Xue poured a cup of tea for the two of them and said, "Dad, you're so good at this! I can't. I only know how to make dumplings. Can you?"
Wen Feng said, "I can too. My mom says she prefers wontons to dumplings. She thinks wontons look nice, like gold ingots. So every year for Chinese New Year, our family makes wontons. My mom didn't know how to make them before. Her wontons were always crooked and not as nice as the ones my dad and I make. But they all look pretty much the same after cooking."
Yu Xue said, "The wontons I eat are all wrapped into small balls, and I've never seen ones shaped like ingots before, but I did see them when I was scrolling through my phone."
Wen Feng said, "The New Year is coming soon. I'll make dumplings for you this year. When I was little, I would make wontons with my dad in the kitchen every year for the New Year. But one year... I forget which year it was, my dad suddenly said he was too tired these days and didn't want to make them. On New Year's Eve, all of our uncles and aunts were on holiday. They all had their own families and had to go back to make dumplings for their parents and children. So my dad didn't want to make them, and my mom had to do it. After that, every year, my mom ended up making them."
Wen Feng: "When I was little, my parents had a very good relationship. My dad would hug my mom and spin her around the house. My dad was too busy to read, so my mom would tell him about the books she was reading recently. I would listen along and hear a lot of stories."
He sighed, his smile fading. "But as time went on, they got older, and their feelings for each other grew weaker. Occasionally, they would even argue because of their grandparents. Although they never talked about divorce or had any major arguments, their feelings just faded and weren't as good as before. Now, when Mom is reading, Dad won't bother her anymore. If Mom wants to go see a movie, Dad always makes excuses that he's too tired."
The wontons arrived, and Wen Feng didn't say anything more.
Yu Xue took the spoon he offered and said, "I've heard many similar stories. It seems that nothing in this world is permanent. Even when you first fall in love, things will fade over time..."
Wen Feng reached for her hand, but Yu Xue said again, "Wen Feng, I believe my feelings for you will never change. Right now, you are my only support. Maybe in the future, when I return to work, I will make new friends and have new support, but half of my life has already been based on you. It's deeply rooted and unshakable. Wen Feng, we are very lucky. No matter how bitter or difficult life is, at least there are no obstacles between us anymore."
Yu Xue handed a pair of chopsticks to Wen Feng, saying, "Let's eat. Don't pull on each other like that, or you'll spill the food."
Wen Feng turned his head, pursed his lips, and smiled. Soon, he regained his seriousness and said, "Yu Xue, I have loved you for too long. Loving you has become a habit, a part of my life. To pull myself away would be too painful. So, I will love you until the end of my life."
That night in the bedroom, the two of them were getting ready to sleep.
Yu Xue suddenly sighed, "I feel like my physical fitness has declined a lot recently. I used to be able to sing for three hours straight, but now I can't even move around properly."
Wen Feng said, "Do you want to join a gym? I know a gym with a lot of privacy. I'll tell you when I go each week, but you say no, it's too tiring."
Yu Xue smiled and said, "Then I'll go to the gym. If I keep lying here like this, even if I recover next year, I won't be able to sing anymore."
Wen Feng: "Okay, then I'll have someone get you a card tomorrow."
Yu Xue: "No need, I'll go by myself. I'll look around at a few places myself. I've been out of touch with society for too long, and I want to do something myself, even if it's a small thing."
Wen Feng sat up and kissed her cheek. "You've been doing better and better lately. I'm really happy to see you doing well."
Yu Xue chuckled at his teasing and said, "Since you don't want to go back to that world, then you should live well in this world. Since you've decided to stay, you don't want to be a burden to me."
“You’re not a burden to me,” Wen Feng replied. “If you’re not busy, can I have lunch with you tomorrow?”
Yu Xue: "I'll come find you. Don't bother going back and forth. I've already found a gym for you tomorrow morning, and I'll come find you at noon. You can help me choose one."
Wen Feng said, "Okay, then I'll wake you up before I leave tomorrow?"
Yu Xue: "Okay, I do need to adjust my schedule."
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