You're addicted to kissing, aren't you?
Meng Qingluan resisted the urge to hit him, but couldn't resist kicking him.
He kicked Chen Yan off the bed.
Following Meng Qingluan's force, Chen Yan naturally landed on the ground, placing his hands on the edge of the bed.
"Luanluan...I'm sleepy."
"..."
Meng Qingluan silently got off the bed, took two thick quilts from a wooden box and threw them to him, then threw the pillows off the bed.
Shen Yan held a pillow in his hands.
"Spread your own pouch on the floor; you're not allowed in bed today."
"The ground is cold."
Shen Yan casually rolled up her sleeve, revealing a recently scabbed scar on her arm. Her tone was pitiful, trying to evoke Meng Qingluan's pity for her.
Seeing this, Meng Qingluan imitated him and casually looked away.
Pretend you can't see anything.
I can't see it, ....
"Shen Yan, playing the victim won't work. Don't think you can get away with the punishment you deserve."
Meng Qingluan reached out and touched the ground again. "The underfloor heating is nice and warm. If you're cold, just put on a couple more blankets. Go get them yourself."
After saying that, he stopped looking at Chen Yan and blew out the candle.
Meng Qingluan lay back on the bed, her back to Shen Yan, her eyes tightly closed.
Seeing Meng Qingluan blow out the candle, Shen Yan felt his words stuck in his throat and resignedly spread the blankets on the ground.
He then lay down on it himself.
Meng Qingluan's gaze was complicated as she scratched at the bed sheet, causing it to wrinkle.
What happened?
How did things turn out this way?
Shouldn't Shen Yan like men? Although she didn't want him to be with Li Zhanjue and repeat the same mistake, in her heart he should like men.
What's the deal with today's kiss?
Damn it, I'm going crazy.
Last time, she could still use the excuse that he didn't understand love and didn't know how sacred and important kissing was.
Today, Shen Yan actually whispered his feelings for her right in her ear.
Meng Qingluan scratched her head, wondering what she should do.
"..."
Is this a good thing or a bad thing? In other words, she has successfully prevented him from falling in love with Li Zhanjue.
Shen Yan heard Meng Qingluan's breathing, light and irregular, clearly indicating that she was still not asleep and her thoughts were unsettled.
"Luanluan?" Shen Yan called softly.
The sound was very soft, yet it easily reached each other's ears in the quiet room.
Meng Qingluan closed her eyes, slowed her breathing, and tried to pretend to be asleep without answering.
"Luanluan," Chen Yan called out to her helplessly again, "I know you're not asleep."
Meng Qingluan opened her eyes, her gaze clear yet filled with an intense, complex emotion.
"Um."
Are you... angry?
"...Why did you suddenly ask that?"
Shen Yan's voice lowered, "Being kissed by someone you don't like, especially someone like me, would definitely feel disgusting, right...?"
"I won't do it again, please don't be angry, okay?"
Meng Qingluan didn't want him to overthink things, lest Li Zhanjue take advantage of the situation, so she denied it.
No, don't overthink it.
After a moment of silence, Shen Yan suddenly threw out a question that struck Meng Qingluan like a bomb.
"Then... does Luanluan like me? Is she willing to stay with me forever?"
"..."
Meng Qingluan's heart was in her throat, and her palms were sweating profusely.
like?
He's the male lead in a pure romance novel. Even without Li Zhanjue, what about the other guys?
Besides, she had never been in a relationship and had been buried in exam papers since childhood. Even when reading novels, she had to secretly borrow them from her classmates at school.
I only developed an interest in following celebrities after I grew up.
She doesn't understand what it means to like or dislike.
dislike?
It's a bit of a lie to say I don't like it. Shen Yan is good-looking, has a nice personality, and his figure is... well...
The two of them had been through thick and thin together, and he was the first person she trusted in this other world.
To say that you don't have a good impression of him would be a bit of self-deception.
But she still wanted to go home. If she were to stay with Shen Yan, how long could they stay together?
She didn't want to leave him with a vague promise; a promise is too light, it can be blown away by a gust of wind.
The promise was too heavy a burden for her; she wasn't confident enough to make it.
It was precisely because she had developed feelings for him that she didn't want to give him an answer easily.
His eventful life, which was fraught with trials and tribulations, was already overshadowed once in the original work by the name of another man.
He should shine brightly in this lifetime.
She would eventually have to go back; she still had her parents and her friends. She couldn't be so selfish as to abandon them for a mere sliver of affection or liking.
Chen Yan's fingernails dug into his flesh, and he remained silent for a long time.
After an unknown amount of time, the person on the bed finally spoke, answering his question.
"Chen Yan, I don't want to lie to you."
Shen Yan gave a soft "hmm" and said gently, "It's okay, even if you don't like it, I'll accept the answer."
"Luanluan, don't feel pressured. I couldn't help but say these things. I just wanted to hear your opinion of me. Whether you like it or not, it's your freedom."
Meng Qingluan dared not turn around to look at him.
"I can't give you that answer right now. There are still things about me that you don't know, and I have many secrets that I haven't told you yet."
"I don't dislike you, I quite like you, and that's why I don't want to lie to you."
"But I don't dare to easily agree to spend my whole life with you. Liking someone is having feelings for them, but spending a lifetime together requires love."
"..."
"Chen Yan, do you know what love is?"
"Love is..." Shen Yan thought of the various things in the book, but found her mind blank. "I don't know."
"Luanluan, can you tell me what love is?" Chen Yan sat up and humbly asked for advice.
Hearing the rustling sounds behind her, Meng Qingluan also sat up and first instructed Chen Yan to light the candles.
The candles by the bedside were relit, their light falling directly onto the two of them.
Meng Qingluan pulled the blanket up and wrapped it around herself, then pointed to the blanket that had fallen beside Shen Yan's legs, indicating that he should wrap it up as well.
Shen Yan understood and, imitating her, wrapped the quilt around her body.
Meng Qingluan suddenly had a feeling…
—The feeling of a couple huddled together on a warm kang (heated brick bed), wrapped in blankets, with crickets chirping behind them.
Meng Qingluan got to the point and explained, "Love is when you eat something delicious, the first thing you think of is bringing the person you love to eat it. It's when you're wronged, the first thing you think of is if she were there. And when you have a conflict with her and others, no matter what the reason, you will stand by her side without hesitation."
Simply put, love is feeling sorry for someone without reason and forgiving them without any preconditions.
Shen Yan listened intently, his eyes flickering with the orange glow of candlelight.
Seeing that he was still sitting there, seemingly understanding but not quite, Meng Qingluan sat up to blow out the candle and rest.
It feels so much better to talk about it.
"I see."
"Okay, I understand."
"I not only like you, I love you."
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