This impression lingered in Li Ruhui's mind for a long time.
Li Ruhui realized that he had changed.
The ups and downs of officialdom hadn't worn down his edges, being forced to desert hadn't destroyed his glory, and years of reading fake documents in the office hadn't corrupted his arrogance. But after just a few months with Tianguang No. 1, his once unbreakable self-esteem and confidence crumbled like clay chickens and earthenware dogs.
Tianguang No. 1 stole three important intelligence reports within a week, memorized the confidential contents right under Lu Huaizhang's nose, and transmitted them using special code words.
Tianguang No. 1 once eliminated a traitor from the organization on the street, in full view of everyone. The moment the traitor fell, he turned around and chatted and laughed with Mrs. Lu.
Tianguang No. 1 once told Lu Huaizhang and Bai Jing'an the same thing, but their understandings were completely different, cleverly clearing him of suspicion.
Tianguang-1 had changed into an inconspicuous blue lining countless times during missions. Li Ruhui knew that inside the collar of that lining was sewn a deadly poison that could kill a person in a matter of seconds.
No one was allowed to touch the bed in Tianguang No. 1, but Li Ruhui knew that there was always a loaded gun under her pillow.
Tian Guang No. 1 had once shifted blame, falsely accusing Cheng Daiqing of being a mole within the Ninth Bureau, leading to Cheng's secret assassination by Lu Huaizhang. On the day Cheng Daiqing died, Tian Guang No. 1, an atheist, unusually lit incense in a dark room at home. When Li Ruhui asked her why, Tian Guang No. 1 replied, "To commemorate the death of an idealist."
Tianguang No. 1...
Li Ruhui had witnessed almost everything that Tianguang No. 1 had done on this land, but she had never seen her waver.
Li Ruhui graduated from a prestigious strategic academy, but he gradually realized one thing—no school in the world could cultivate a student like Tianguang No. 1. Even the best instructors couldn't reach her fingertips on this battlefield.
Tianguang-1 is like a majestic mountain, blocking all attacks from the outside world, both overt and covert. Tianguang-1 is like a deep pool of water, melting away all the wind, frost, rain, and snow.
Tian Guang Yi Hao gradually melted Li Ru Hui's heart. He was intoxicated by her almost omnipotent demeanor and became increasingly terrified of his own uselessness. He needed to exert all his strength to keep up with Tian Guang Yi Hao's pace and be constantly on guard against holding her back.
During Li Ruhui's first winter here, Ruguan was blanketed in heavy snow. The continuous snow covered Ruguan with a thick layer of snow, and Tianguang No. 1 stood by the window watching the snow. Li Ruhui, who rarely had a moment of leisure, poured Tianguang No. 1 a cup of hot tea and handed it to him.
Tianguang No. 1 looked back and saw Li Ruhui frozen in place by that glance.
The room was warm, the warmth melting the snow that had fallen on the windowsill, but it couldn't melt away the gaze of Tianguang No. 1. She silently looked out the window and sighed softly, "The comrades on the northern battlefield are going to suffer."
For this sentence, Li Ruhui spent two or three days running around, collecting a batch of warm clothing, but he couldn't get it to the intended destination. In the end, the clothing was donated to an orphanage, and Li Ruhui even received a commendation from the Nationalist government in the newspaper for this.
Sometimes, when Tianguang No. 1 was in a good mood, he would generously share his experience and common sense with Li Ruhui.
Li Ruhui once frowned and questioned, "That's not how schools teach."
Tianguang No. 1 responded with a mocking remark: "Can a diploma from the Caterline Strategic Studies School stop a bullet?"
On another occasion, Li Ruhui passed by the study in Tianguang No. 1 and seemed to hear faint crying coming from inside. That night, Li Ruhui stood outside the door, watching the dim yellow light shining through the crack in the door, and stood there for a long time without knocking.
The next morning, Tian Guang No. 1 and Li Ruhui passed each other without pausing. Li Ruhui's heart tightened suddenly. He hoped that Tian Guang No. 1 would ask something, but she didn't. Tian Guang No. 1 put on her military uniform as usual and went to work at the Ninth Bureau without any abnormality.
Li Ruhui's emotions shifted from pride to awe, and then from awe to fear.
Tianguang-1 was like a precisely running clock, each tick piercing the deepest recesses of Li Ruhui's soul. Li Ruhui stared in terror at the three hands of varying lengths, knowing that the clock would eventually strike, shattering his entire self.
He was willing to spend his entire life searching for listening devices in Tianguang No. 1's rooms and spies outside the mansion; he was willing to unlock the bathroom window and open the balcony door every night, and load the gun that Tianguang No. 1 always kept under his pillow with bullets.
He was willing to spend his life running errands for Tianguang No. 1, translating the various accents on the radio into lines of coded text. If Tianguang No. 1 was eventually exposed, he would rush to shield her from bullets so that she could continue her unfinished work.
Li Ruhui knew this wasn't love. He had simply been lost on this path for far too long, so much so that when he encountered an indestructible, infallible entity, he couldn't help but want to rely on it. Like a newly hatched chick identifying the first thing it sees as its mother, like his past dependence on alcohol.
Tianguang No. 1 took the alcohol away from him, and so this person took the place of the alcohol.
He needed Tianguang-1's unwavering gaze as his guiding light, and Tianguang-1's concise and powerful commands as the meaning of his existence. Every symbol written by Tianguang-1 was Sanskrit that continued his life.
He wished so much that Tianguang-1 was his mother, because a mother would never abandon her child. He wished so much that Tianguang-1 was his father, because in this era, a father could almost completely control his child.
Li Ruhui was willing to use every means in the world to weave a protective shell around the thin thread of connection between him and Tianguang-1. In this way, he would not have to live in constant fear of being abandoned by Tianguang-1.
In the end, even this wish became a pipe dream. Tianguang-1 climbed higher and higher, its hand growing colder and colder. Its hands were stained with the blood of countless people. The chasm between them grew deeper and deeper, becoming increasingly insurmountable…
He no longer expected Tianguang-1 to never abandon him. He only hoped that when Tianguang-1 abandoned him, he would waver for a moment.
Tianguang No. 1 was injured. She went to deal with a traitor within the organization and was shot in the shoulder.
Li Ruhui finally had a chance to prove his usefulness, and he was overjoyed. He almost devoutly cut open Tianguang No. 1's clothes, gazing at the other's powerful, thin muscles and the hideous wound on his shoulder like a believer worshipping a statue.
When the wound was accidentally aggravated, Tianguang-1's body shuddered. Li Ruhui was surprised that machines could also feel pain.
When Li Ruhui picked up the alcohol to disinfect, he hesitated.
Tianguang-1 is like a block of ice, within which lies a flame called faith, burning ceaselessly day and night. If alcohol were applied, would it melt the ice, fuel the flame, and ultimately burn it to ashes?
"Are you sure you can do it?" Tianguang No. 1 asked politely. "If you can't bring yourself to do it, I'll do it myself."
Li Ruhui came to his senses and found his bizarre associations laughable.
"Feel sorry."
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