Chapter 132 [VIP] Lifesaver (19)
Xiao Feihe watched her walk further and further away with his eyes wide open. His lips trembled slightly. He felt as if he had fallen into an ice cellar, with an unbearable chill emanating from his entire body.
Why? Clearly just a moment ago she was still acting coquettishly in his arms, she was still kissing him, and she was still smiling at him with joy, but why?
Why did things suddenly turn out like this?
She had agreed, she had obviously agreed! They had already exchanged birthday cards, they were about to get married, why did things turn out like this?
Xiao Feihe couldn't stand it, he really couldn't accept such a result. His eyes were filled with mist uncontrollably. Her figure became more and more blurred in his sight. He wanted to chase after her and explain something to her, but he seemed to be nailed to the spot. All the words he had used to coax her to apologize were stuck in his throat, making his throat dry and sore. He couldn't even utter a word in rebuttal.
"Yan Yan..."
He wanted her not to leave, wanted her not to treat him like that, he was sincere, it was a lie at first, but later it was all sincere!
He staggered forward a few steps, but accidentally kicked the small red box that fell on the ground. The little golden toads inside rolled out one by one. Xiao Feihe's nose felt uncontrollably sour, and tears instantly fell down, hitting the back of his hand heavily and disintegrating into one piece. He seemed to be unaware of it.
Xiao Feihe seemed to be awake from his trance. He squatted down hurriedly and picked up the things one by one. His movements were quick and careful, for fear of missing any one. The more he picked, the thicker the mist in his eyes became. These were all the things she liked. He had not given her the key to his warehouse, and his prince's mansion was still missing a mistress. She had clearly agreed to be his wife, so how could she give him up?
Xiao Feihe felt like he was almost out of breath, and his mind was filled with memories of the past...
She said she liked crabapples, and his Prince's Mansion had planted all the crabapples she liked. Soon, they would bloom in March, and they would be very beautiful. She also liked to fly kites, and he had secretly made a big and beautiful silk kite for her and hid it in the study. When the weather was good, they could go fly a kite together. He would still listen to her orders as before, and climb up and down to pick up a kite for her...
He knew he was wrong, he really knew he was wrong!
At this moment, Xiao Feihe's heart was filled with endless regret and hopeless pain that almost overwhelmed him.
The biggest mistake he made in his life was to deceive the feelings of another innocent woman for his own selfish desires. How could he hurt her like this? He was really shameless and selfish. Sometimes even he felt guilty and regretful in his heart, but he really liked her.
He thought about telling her the truth more than once, but he was really afraid. The truth was too hurtful. He didn't even dare to mention it to her, let alone her! He was afraid that she couldn't bear it, that she wouldn't forgive him, that she would be sad. He didn't want to see her cry anymore, so he thought that as long as he kept it well, as long as he kept it serious, she would never know the secret. She could always be like before, with him without any scruples, smiling at him happily, but what could he do? Now she knew, and it was still the same...
He will never be forgiven by her in his life!
Xiao Feihe felt that his chest was hurting so much that he could hardly breathe, and his eyes were even slowly covered with blood. He had no idea what to do.
What should he do?
He had obviously fallen in love with her a long time ago. How could such a good girl not be likable? The time he spent with her was the happiest time of his life.
He really likes her, to the extent that he is willing to do his best to change himself and be with her. How could he bear to give up?
He didn't know when he started to care about her, her every move, her smile, and her every expression. He really couldn't bear to leave her, and even more so, this hard-earned relationship...
Xiao Feihe hurriedly picked up all the things scattered on the ground. He didn't even notice his fingers being cut by gravel. His mind was confused. Those things belonged to Yanyan. They were his betrothal gifts to Yanyan. He prepared a lot of betrothal gifts and beautiful jewelry for her. They were all things she liked...
But when his fingers touched the distorted letter of appointment, they froze instantly.
At that moment, a sharp and intense pain suddenly surged up from his heart, causing Xiao Feihe to almost fall down. His fingertips were trembling slightly in pain.
She also refused to accept the letter of appointment.
What should I do? What should I do?
Xiao Feihe took a few breaths, and carefully picked up the marriage certificate with their names on it, smoothing out the wrinkles one inch at a time with his fingers. But what could he do? The mud and blood stains on it could not be wiped clean. Xiao Feihe's lips trembled, and he felt that the regret was about to make him collapse. On the day he was most looking forward to, on the day he was so happy, such a blow would really drive him crazy.
No, he couldn't just give up like this. He still had a lot to say to her and he hadn't asked for her forgiveness yet. He couldn't just give up like this.
It was his fault in the first place, so it was normal for her to be angry. As long as he tried hard to explain, as long as he explained everything clearly from beginning to end, she would definitely forgive him. She was so soft-hearted and did not hold grudges. She usually did not care too much when she was bullied, so she would definitely forgive him this time.
As Xiao Feihe thought this, his heart seemed to tremble slightly. He wiped away his tears casually, then stuffed the letter of appointment into his arms, closest to his heart, turned around and chased after him.
…
On the other side, Nan Yan had just walked out of the mansion when she saw Jin Lili standing not far away.
He was wearing a plain white cloak, his lips were pale, almost bloodless, and his face was also very pale. When he saw her, he was flustered for a moment, and then he subconsciously walked forward, untied his cloak and wrapped her up.
"Yan Yan..."
In fact, as early as the moment Jin Lili heard that Xiao Feihe brought a matchmaker to the Li Mansion to propose marriage, he had already rushed over in a hurry. He finally found out the truth of the matter. He found out the reason why Xiao Feihe approached her. That person had been deceiving her from the beginning to the end, and he approached her only because of something Li Qingrou had said to him.
Jin Xinli was carrying this secret with him, and he was even a little nervous at that moment. He originally wanted to tell Nan Yan the truth directly. As long as he told Yan Yan and told her Xiao Feihe's purpose, they would definitely not get married.
But when he arrived at Li's house, he realized that he had actually retreated in fear. He was really afraid. He was afraid that she would be hurt again, afraid that she would be heartbroken again. He was so afraid that he didn't even dare to tell the truth.
If she knew such a disgusting truth and purpose, she would definitely collapse in despair.
So Jin Lili didn't dare to say anything. He hesitated and wandered in front of the Li Mansion until later when he finally thought of a solution. As long as he could stop this marriage, it would be enough!
Rather than letting her feel heartbroken and hopeless after knowing that she had been deceived by the person she liked from beginning to end, it would be better for her to hate only him. As long as he prevented this marriage, she would not suffer such hurt again, or at least would not be so painful.
When Jin Lili made this decision, his heart felt as if it was being stabbed by a knife, but he would rather endure the pain himself than let her get hurt again.
People like them may have been in high positions for too long, so they have become particularly despicable and selfish. They only think about their own interests from beginning to end, but trample on the sincerity of others. He really doesn't want to see her cry again.
He had hurt her too many times. That time in the tent, he watched her cry in despair and become the laughing stock of everyone. When she cried and begged him to hug her, he pushed her away and turned around to find Li Qingrou without hesitation.
Later, after realizing who he really liked, he began to regret it. He was so selfish, so selfish that he thought he could win her back as long as he regretted it!
But this belated affection and guilt was like tearing open the wound in her heart that had finally healed, causing her pain once again!
He really knew he was wrong...
He had done so many excessive things to her, and made her cry so many times, and every time she shed tears it was because of him. How dare he? How dare he make her sad again?
Jin Lili carefully wrapped the man tightly with his cloak.
He originally thought so, but seeing how hopeless and emotionally broken she was now, he vaguely guessed that someone must have bullied her.
With her personality, she wouldn't show such an expression unless she was really sad to the point of despair, just like the time when he abandoned her in the camp.
Jin Lili was even a little scared for a moment. He was afraid that she could not bear such a blow and would do something unreasonable. What should he do?
"Are you stupid? Don't you know that the weather is already very cold? You are wearing so few clothes, it is easy to catch a cold and get sick. Have you forgotten that you hate taking Chinese medicine? It tastes very bitter. You taught me a lot in the past, why don't you listen to me now?"
Jin Lili fastened his cloak tightly, and although he was scolding, his voice became softer and gentler.
南嫣緩慢擡起臉，眼尾泛着深深的紅，她眼睛一眨，眼淚便不受控制地落了下來，然後啞着聲音問他，“靳厭離，你知道……蕭非鶴一直在騙我的事情嗎？”
靳厭離嘴唇動了動，心口忽然湧出一種酸澀心疼的感覺。
他捏緊了手指，強忍着想要将人擁進懷裏的沖動，然後壓低聲音沙啞說了句，
“剛知道不久，還沒來得及告訴你。”
南嫣忽然忍不住笑了，眼淚無聲無息地順着臉龐滑落，不小心滴在他的手背上，滾燙的溫度燙的他手指甚至有些發顫。
“果然啊，所有人都知道，就只有我被蒙在鼓裏，真可笑。”
靳厭離的心髒也跟着微微輕顫了起來。
他甚至不知道該怎麽去安慰她，就在他一籌莫展的時候，他突然就聽到她輕輕地說了一聲，
“對不起啊，靳厭離。”
“原來我一直都不知道，被人欺騙的感覺竟是這樣的，真是既痛苦又惡心。”
她面色蒼白的近乎透明，發絲淩亂着，整個人仿佛下一瞬就要支撐不住了似的，目光怔怔地望着他，
“從前你知道我騙你的時候也一定很難受吧，興許比我現在感受到的程度還要惡心百倍，因為我甚至還哄騙着你成功地跟我定下了婚約，那時的你應該比我要更惡心吧？”
她說着這話，忽然轉過頭來望着他，眼裏忽然露出一種極致的心酸與委屈，聲音哽咽着道，“你說這是不是就是報應？”
“因為我從前欺騙了你，所以老天爺要來懲罰我，所以就安排了另一個人來欺騙我？讓我也嘗嘗這種被人欺騙的滋味，可是為什麽是他呢？為什麽要用這種方式呢？”
靳厭離下意識抓住了她的手腕，他的眼睛也微微有些泛酸了。
他想說不是的，不一樣的，他們怎麽能一樣呢？他這樣的人是罪有應得啊！
明明從一開始就是他自己的錯，是他自己不長眼睛認錯了人，僅憑一塊玉佩就主動接近她，照拂她，引着她一點一點地對自己動了心，最後更是在後山那片桃林裏主動吻了她……明明從一開始就沒有明确的問過她，甚至在她不明所以的時候主動為她尋找借口，以為是她為了維護名節故意裝作不認識他！一直到定婚之後，他才察覺到不對勁的，之後更是将她傷得遍體鱗傷，他怎麽能跟她是一樣的呢？
靳厭離用力握住她的手掌，然後貼在胸口的位置，目光愧疚又心疼地望着她，“不一樣的，嫣嫣，別這樣說自己，惡心的人是我，是我眼瞎分不清自己喜歡的人是誰，也分不清自己的救命恩人是誰？是我胡亂地把所有的事情造成今天這樣的局面，是我該死！倘若不是我，他不會有機會傷害你的，一開始就是我欺負了你，是我讓你退婚淪為所有人的笑柄，從始至終都是我的錯！”
“你不需要自責的，你對我從來都不需要自責的，即便你是故意的，我都不會怪你，何況我傷你那麽深，別哭了，求求你了？”
南嫣怔怔望着他，淚水幾乎将整個視線都模糊了。
靳厭離見狀便又伸手去擦拭她的眼淚，他動作小心翼翼的，眼神中忽然帶了幾分祈求與試探的意味，“嫣嫣，忘了他好嗎？我們重新開始，我會帶你離開這裏，我們找個沒有是非的地方，過從前那種平淡的日子好不好？這一次，我一定會好好守着你的，不會讓任何人再欺負你，好不好？”
但南嫣卻別過了臉，她眼圈通紅的，然後伸手撥開了他的手，
“不行的，我忘不了他的……”
不僅如此，她往他心口狠狠插了一刀，讓他再無翻身的機會，永遠就只能凝望着她的背影追悔莫及。
“對不起，我跟你之間早就已經回不到過去了。往後，不管我跟蕭非鶴之間會變成什麽樣，我跟你依舊是永遠都不可能的了。”
她擡眸看着他，語氣說的那樣肯定。
聽到這句話時，靳厭離的手指都僵住了，他嘴唇顫抖着，眼眶裏的眼珠子因為過度的絕望而微微抖動着。
這一瞬間，他忽然覺得自己好絕望啊。
像是被困在了一望無際的海中央，到處都是冰冷苦澀的海水，将他整個人一點一點的湮沒了，渾身冷到發顫。
而說完這句話後，南嫣整個人面色更加蒼白了，她伸手拂開擋在身前的這人，想要往前走去，但身子忽然不受控制地一軟，整個人仿佛再也承受不住了，徹底失去了意識。
而靳厭離甚至還來不及為方才的回答而傷心難過，身體下意識地就做出了反應，直接将對面陷入昏迷的人抱進懷裏。
“嫣嫣！你怎麽了？”
他手指幾乎下意識地去探她的鼻息，臉上神情因為過度慌亂而緊繃着，在确定對方只是因為遭受的刺激過重而陷入了昏迷之後，靳厭離這才松了口氣。
随後便是将懷中昏睡的人摟得更緊，擁住的那一瞬間，他胸口又酸又脹，像被什麽東西填滿了，他真的已經好久沒有這樣抱着她了，她也很久沒有這樣乖順地靠在他懷裏了。
曾幾何時，他只要一伸手就能擁抱她的，可如今，居然淪落到只能趁着她昏迷不醒的時候才能這樣觸碰她。
靳厭離想到這些，胸口又不受控制地翻湧起了某種苦澀難言的情緒。
他直接抱着昏睡的南嫣回了靳府。
他已經不想把嫣嫣留在李府了，把她留在那裏只會遭受無盡的議論與風波，還有衆人的追問與打擾，他不想讓她再遭受任何的打擊了，在事情沒有塵埃落定之前，他都不會再讓蕭非鶴接近她的了。
……
而在另一邊的李府，突如其來的取消婚約的消息讓李府上下都有些懵。
衆人還不知道發生了何事，為什麽大小姐明明答應了的婚事突然又後悔了？
不僅取消了婚事，甚至連蕭世子的面都不肯再見了，最重要的是，大小姐還住進了靳府，這些消息還都是靳府的下人過來通知的，這都是什麽事啊？
好端端的為什麽又弄成這副模樣了？
李夫人聽到這個消息時，真是氣得恨不得把那個臭丫頭片子抓回來好好教訓一頓。
這樣糟蹋自個兒的名聲，她那破破爛爛的清白名節到底還要不要了？
她親自帶着丫鬟婆子去靳府接人，卻被靳府的下人的攔住了，說是李小姐病得很厲害了，大夫說了，這會兒不宜吹風、也不宜走動，還是讓大小姐先把病養好再回李府去吧。
李夫人原本還不相信，以為是那應靳的找的借口，故意把她家女兒扣住了，可等她真看到那屋內燒得面頰通紅，昏迷之中還不停流淚的女兒時，那顆心頓時就軟成了一團發面團，現在她相信了，自家女兒肯定是受欺負了，否則不可能病成這個樣子，還堅定的要退婚的！
到底是發生了什麽事情？
李夫人帶着外套風風火火的就趕回了李府，将女兒的貼身丫鬟招來一問，
問那天在院子裏到底發生了什麽事情，那個蕭世子到底做了什麽惹大小姐傷心的事情？為什麽大小姐病成那個樣子都沒人知道？還有你是大小姐的貼身丫鬟，你說，把那天後花園發生的事情一樁一件地給本夫人說清楚！
丫鬟戰戰兢兢地都不敢擡頭，心裏怕得要死，後來還是哭喪着臉說道，那天在後花園中看到了二小姐跟蕭世子抱在一起了。
兩人之間似乎很親密的樣子，說了好些親近的話，最後這場面竟被大小姐當場撞見了，然後吵了幾句，之後的事情她就不知道了。
聽到這個消息時，李夫人當場心涼了半截，拍在桌面上的力度重的讓府中所有在場的下人都吓了一跳，最後李夫人面色沉下來了，然後讓人去将二小姐請過來。
等到李清柔進入堂廳，看到主位之上的父親母親，周遭除了一些貼身伺候的丫鬟下人就再無旁的下人時，她便知道這二人是要三堂會審，替李南嫣讨回公道了。
李清柔心中只覺得一陣諷刺，在堂前站得身姿挺直，心中半分懼意與悔意也無，她就是要李南嫣也跟她一樣痛苦。
等到李清柔剛剛站定時，李夫人手上的那個茶杯就毫不猶豫地朝她砸了過去。
沒砸到人，但是砸到了腳邊，裏頭的茶水瞬間潑了出來，澆濕了她的鞋面。
李清柔的眼睫顫動了一下，表情仍是未變。
李夫人眼睛通紅地盯着她，“說，你那天在後花園到底都做了什麽？”
與李夫人盛怒的狀态不同，李清柔不怒不惱，她也擡眸直直地朝主位上的父親母親望了過去，然後冷靜地回答道，
“清柔那天只是想幫姐姐試探一下蕭世子的為人而已。”
她面色平靜地看着兩人，似乎早就想好了說辭，“我早就聽外頭傳言，那蕭世子是個游手好閑、不三不四且花天酒地的纨绔子弟，所以就想幫姐姐驗證一番而已。”
她說這話的時候，臉上的表情毫不心虛，“結果我那天不過就挑逗着說了幾句話而已，那蕭世子就沖過來緊緊抱住了我，要不是姐姐當場撞見，只怕還不知道會發生什麽樣的事情呢。”
李清柔說到這裏，眉間微微蹙着，臉上似乎還露出了些許嫌棄後怕的神情，好一會兒才平複下來，繼續說道，
“如今來看，那蕭世子在李府，當着衆多下人的面，都敢對我這個姨妹肆意欺辱調戲，由此可見，這人絕對不是良配。”
說到最後，李清柔又對上李夫人的眼睛，毫無愧疚與心虛地說道，
“我這樣以身犯險，幫姐姐看清了此人的品性，母親為何要這樣生氣呢？難道母親也希望姐姐嫁給那種不正經的浪蕩子嗎？”
“呸，你給我住口！”
李夫人臉色漲紅，漸而發青，整個人被氣到渾身發抖，“你簡直就是伶牙俐齒、滿口胡言！”
那張白皙的富貴面容幾乎要扭曲了，
“若真是按照你說的那樣，那蕭世子是個色/欲熏心的浪蕩子弟，他從小到大什麽樣的女人沒見過，怎麽可能會在李府如此不顧臉面地輕薄于你？”
“你把他當什麽了？你又把我們當什麽人了？連你使的這點下作的手段都看不明白的話，本夫人這麽些年的家都白當了。”
“你這個混賬玩意兒！”李夫人越說越氣，那一瞬間，這麽些年積壓的李夫人胸口怒氣瞬間就如火山一樣爆發了，“你從小就是這樣，從小就是這個樣子！”
“你被你那個親娘教壞了，你不尊嫡母，不近嫡姐，成日裏勾心鬥角耍盡手段，一副小家子氣的做派，你以為那些人不清楚嗎？那些夫人長輩們心裏清楚得很，任你再低三下四地讨好，她們都不可能聘你這種拉踩自家姐妹的人回去做當家主母！”
李夫人的怒氣節節攀升，“你以為所有人都欠你的，你從小就要跟嫣嫣争，什麽都要跟她一樣，她有的你也要有，你沒有的，你就要想盡辦法毀了她的才肯甘心。”
“從小到大，你明裏暗裏的不知道欺過她多少次了？事事都要壓她一頭，名聲要比她好聽，才情要比她出衆，這些小打小鬧，本夫人今天都不想再計較了。”
“可如今她好不容易才相中的婚事，你為什麽又要去摻合一腳啊？”
“你分明就是在報複，你報複她早前因為玉佩的事情欺瞞了你，你嫉恨她如今比你過得好，可是你是不是忘記了，她也被退過婚了啊，她也受到懲罰了，當初她那麽傷心的時候你可曾有來看過她一次，都這樣了，你為什麽還是不肯放過她啊？”
李夫人字字泣血，句句誅心，說到最後連眼淚都忍不住出來了。
身旁的李大人看着自家夫人那副傷心欲絕的模樣，也忍不住從懷裏掏出一塊帕子遞過去，卻被夫人一巴掌拍開。
李大人摸了摸發疼的手，轉頭又看向堂中的二女兒，頓時又嘆了一聲，無能為力。
李夫人的這番話，幾乎是将兩人之間的最後一塊遮羞布都扯得一幹二淨。
李清柔的眼睛也忍不住紅了，她用力攥緊了手指，擡眸怨恨地盯着兩人，一直以來壓抑的情緒也終于爆發了，
“是，母親說的是，既然話已經說到這個份上，那我也不必再遮遮掩掩了。”
“我就是在報複，我怨恨你們，為什麽同為父親的女兒，我從小就不如李南嫣受寵？所有人都愛她比愛我多，祖母是這樣，父親也是這樣，還有你更是這樣！”
“我就是不甘心，我就是怨恨她，為什麽她什麽都不用做，不用努力就能輕而易舉地得到所有人的喜歡？為什麽我樣樣比她出色，什麽都做的比她好，可是父親疼愛她永遠都比疼愛我多？”
李清柔眼睛通紅地盯着兩人，眼裏的怨氣幾乎要凝出實質，“難道就因為我這個庶女的身份嗎？就因為我的母親是個丫鬟嗎？所以不管我多努力，永遠都比不上李南嫣那個嫡女的身份嗎？憑什麽，嫡庶差別真就這麽大嗎？可我也是父親的女兒啊，我就是不甘心，我就是要怨恨她，我要讓她跟我一樣痛苦難受。”
這番話說完之後，空氣中忽然靜默了。
連李大人都有些啞口無言，張了張嘴，完全不知道該說什麽好？
他真的從不知道，這個女兒對自己、對主母、對嫡姐的怨恨竟然這般大？
他們到底做錯什麽了？好吃好喝地供着她，難道還養出仇人來了嗎？
李夫人忽然無力地往椅子上一靠，整個人變得異常的冷靜清醒，她看着堂下那個庶女道，冷笑了一聲道，“既然是這樣的話，那你最該怨恨的應該是你那個親娘。”
李清柔下意識地睜大了眼，眼淚滞在了眼眶，仿佛被這句話怔住了，和她娘有什麽關系，她為什麽要怨恨她娘？
李夫人冷冷嗤笑了一聲，“你怨恨我的女兒分走了原本屬于你的疼愛，那本夫人又該怨恨誰呢？”
李夫人冷靜又漠然地望着堂下的庶女，“當初你那個親娘趁着本夫人懷孕時爬上老爺的床，你可知我又該去怨恨誰呢？”
李夫人冷笑着呵了一聲，“你母親原本作為我的丫鬟，一直盡心盡力地服侍我，我沒有半分苛待于她，甚至因為她的盡心而給她找了一戶老實忠厚的平頭百姓作為依靠，只等她賣身期限滿了就放她回去成親嫁人，結果我把這事告訴她之後，她轉個身就爬上了老爺的床，你說這事我又該怨恨誰呢？”
“我知道我的丈夫管不住自己的下半身，可你母親為什麽要這樣對我呢？”
李大人聽到這話時頓時有些羞愧難當，拿着袖子遮臉，這些個陳芝麻爛谷子的事情怎麽能在兒女們的面前說呢，實在是難堪。
李夫人的聲音更冷了，“你娘搶走了我的丈夫，她的女兒出身以後還要分走我女兒的疼愛，我這個當主母的不僅不能生氣，還要對那個孩子一視同仁。”
“你說，本夫人又該去怨恨誰呢？”
李清柔張了張嘴，嘴唇輕顫着，她似乎沒想到這其中還有這樣複雜的過程，她娘親從來沒有跟她說過這些事情。
她娘只說了，在這世上，你想得到一些東西就必須自己努力去争取，不去争取，就永遠也得不到。
她娘說自己從小過慣了苦日子來的，她祖上也曾闊過，還是書香門第，可是到了她父親那一代，家中早已窮得叮當響了，每日窮的連三餐都吃不飽，她父親替人抄書謀生，她從小就跟着一起掙錢，小小的手連筆杆子都握不住，那樣的日子實在太苦了。
可在這李府就不一樣了，她可以錦衣玉食，可以享用珍馐美味，還有下人伺候，所以這樣的好日子一定要自己把握住。
她娘還說，嫡庶之間只不過是一字之差而已，她娘雖為丫鬟，可是才情樣貌樣樣不差，所以她成了父親的妾氏，如今吃穿用度不比當家主母差，而她只要比李南嫣出色，樣樣都做到最好，她這個庶女與嫡女其實沒什麽差別的。
可是李夫人的這番話就猶如當頭一棒，讓她莫名地就有些心虛，如果是這樣的話，那豈不是從頭到尾都是她搶了李南嫣的東西，分走了屬于她的疼愛？
不、不對，不能這樣算的，上一輩子的恩怨怎麽能延續到下一輩子來呢？何況這是她跟李南嫣之間的恩怨，又怎麽能牽扯到別的事情上呢？
當初本來就是李南嫣對不起她，如果不是她當初隐瞞欺騙靳厭離，她跟靳厭離之間也不會錯過，如今也就不會落到這種地步。
這怎麽能全都怪她呢？
李清柔這樣想着，但眼淚還是不受控制地落下來了，她也不知道自己為什麽會流淚，好像心底有種空落落的感覺。
之後李清柔就被禁足了，府裏那天發生的事情除了幾個親近的丫鬟婆子之外，其他人都不得而知。
畢竟，這府中兒女們接二連三的被退婚，再傳出這種庶妹勾搭姐姐未婚夫婿導致婚事被退的消息，只怕這輩子，李府剩下的女兒們都沒個好名聲了。
甚至外人還會傳這李府家風不正，後宅不寧，上梁不正下梁歪，遲早要遭人唾棄的。
……
而在另一邊，從李府出來之後，南嫣的身體就再也支撐不住了，整個人失去意識之後被靳厭離帶到了府中，但興許是白日的刺激過重，她當晚就發起了高熱，病得厲害。
靳厭離看着這人嘴唇燒的通紅，眉頭微微皺着，細細地喘着氣，嘴裏還不停呢喃着什麽，“騙子……”
“為什麽要騙我呢……”
Her eyes were tightly closed. Even though she fell into a coma, her thick black eyelashes still trembled from time to time, and her crow feathers were stained with a layer of moisture.
The voice became weaker and weaker, calling Xiao Feihe's name again and again, with grievance and nostalgia, intermittently. Sometimes she said she was cold, then hot, and sometimes she cried very sadly, the kind of tears that flowed silently.
Jin Lili looked at her with heartache. This was the situation he was most worried about. Seeing her in so much pain and suffering, he really didn't know what to do.
What should I do?
How can I make her feel less uncomfortable?
Faintly he heard her murmuring again, as if she was calling someone's name.
"Xiao Feihe, don't leave me... hug me..."
She begged and sobbed, her weak breathing barely audible.
Jin Lili took a deep breath. For a moment he felt that his life was hopeless. He could only hold her hand carefully and coax her in a hoarse voice.
"Well... I'm right here. I won't leave you. I'll never leave you."
Hearing this response, the person in his sleep burst into tears again, and his voice became more choked, "Xiao Feihe..."
He grabbed her hand and said in a hoarse voice, "Yes, it's me. I'm here."
She said weakly, "Why... did you lie to me?"
Jin Lili paused for a moment, then put her palm on her lips and coaxed her gently, "I'm sorry, I was wrong, I will never dare to lie to you again, so you have to get well soon and teach me a lesson, okay?"
As Jin Xinli was talking, tears unconsciously slid down his face. He whispered in a low voice, as if to coax her, with unprecedented patience and tenderness, "I'll let him come to apologize for your crime, okay? Catch him and beat him up to vent your anger, okay? How about giving him thirty lashes?"
"Is it too light? How about adding twenty more?"
"Yanyan, why do you become so stupid now?"
He kissed the back of her hand, kissing her closely and gently, "In the past, whenever you were bullied, you would come to me to support you, and whenever you were teased by a cat, you would always fight back..."
"You used to be such a proud and unrestrained young lady, how come you can only cry now? You are so useless. What's the point of crying when you are bullied? You can obviously come to me. I have been free recently. Besides, I have done so many things to support you that I am familiar with it. Why are you backing down..."
After hearing his gentle and slow coaxing, the person sleeping on the bed finally seemed to calm down a little. He stopped crying and murmuring, and even his breathing became steadier.
And during these two days, Jin Xinli had been taking care of her without taking off his clothes.
In fact, Jin Lili's illness had not been cured during this period, but he did not have a cold, so he would not get sick for long.
But he was worried about letting the maids take care of Yanyan, as he thought they were not gentle enough, so he did everything himself, carefully wiping the sweat from her forehead.
…
As for the movement outside, it has never stopped.
Xiao Feihe has been squatting at the gate of Jin's mansion for the past two days and has not left since Jin Lili took Yanyan away.
At this moment, Xiao Feihe also looked very frightened. He was very anxious. He heard that Yanyan was seriously ill, but Jin Lili had refused to let him see her.
During the days he wandered around the gate of Jin Mansion, Xiao Feihe was so anxious that he just broke in. However, the guards of Jin Mansion were strict. He broke in four times in two days, but was stopped and thrown out every time.
Later, when he was about to break in again, he was stopped by Jin Lili, who coldly warned him that Yanyan was still resting, and he was making such a big fuss on purpose to prevent her from resting well and to make her condition worse.
After he said this, Xiao Feihe immediately didn't dare to break in anymore. He just stood outside the door obediently, for fear of disturbing Yanyan's rest.
But it’s been two days now…
Xiao Feihe really couldn't stand it anymore. If he wasn't allowed to see Yanyan again, he would really go crazy.
He had no idea how she was doing now. The less he saw her, the more worried he was. He wondered if she had taken her medicine honestly. She was afraid of bitterness, so she had to think hard every time she took medicine. He also didn't know if she was still running a fever. If she was, she had to cool down quickly, and she couldn't use too cold water to cool down...
Most importantly, he didn't know if she was crying quietly?
Thinking of this, Xiao Feihe's heart trembled slightly. She must have cried. She cried so heartbroken and desperate when she left that day. He really hurt her this time.
On the morning of the third day, the gate of the Jin Mansion finally opened. Xiao Feihe saw Jin Lili walking out of the door. He subconsciously stepped forward and asked nervously and anxiously,
"Where's Yanyan? How is she? Has she woken up? Is she willing to see me?"
Jin Li glanced at him expressionlessly, and replied for the first time, "He's still asleep, but he keeps repeating your name."
Hearing this, Xiao Feihe's heart seemed to ache, and tears appeared in his eyes unconsciously. He begged his former rival, "Can you let me see her?"
Jin Lili sneered coldly, with a look of extreme disgust in his eyes, "What qualifications do you have to see her? Who do you think caused her to be like this now? What, cheating her is not enough, so you want to hurt her again?"
Xiao Feihe hurriedly explained, his eyes red, "No, no, Master Jin, I beg you, please! I know I did a lot of things wrong, but I really never wanted to hurt her. Just let me see Yanyan. As long as you let me see her once, you can teach me any lesson you want."
After hearing this, Jin Lili's eyes became even colder, he clenched his fingers tightly, and murderous intent emerged in his eyes. It's not like he hasn't killed people before, and he wanted to just kill the man in front of him and be done with it, but in the end he calmed down all his emotions.
He knew that the person Yanyan liked now was him.
Even in her coma she kept calling out this man's name. If he really hurt him, she would be even more heartbroken.
Jin Lili exhaled heavily and said,
"She hasn't woken up yet. The doctor said that the patient might be too shocked and refused to wake up. She kept repeating your name. Go and see if you can wake her up."
All he did was in vain because he was no longer the person she had in mind.
Jin Lili finished speaking with an expressionless face.
Then he turned and left. Looking at this man for even a second longer would make him unable to hold back the jealousy in his heart.