Chapter 74 "Compared to Huang Shiyu going to take pictures..."
"Compared to Huang Shiyu bidding on that batch of medical equipment, I think Qixing is more suitable. I've just been discussing this with Zhang Jinheng recently..."
As Lu Xiao recounted what had happened that day, a line from the Tao Te Ching flashed through her mind: "Misfortune may be a blessing in disguise, and a blessing may be a misfortune in disguise." She looked at the trophy in her hand, smiled, and suddenly felt an urge to smash it to the ground. But then she remembered that the trophy was made of pure gold, and immediately lost her nerve, dismissing the idea.
Rather than smashing the trophy, she actually wanted to rush up to Li Xingzhou and ask him face to face why he did it!
He was the one who proposed the terms of the exchange, and he offered to help her buy the equipment. So why did he go to such lengths to deceive her in the end?
Are they treating him like a fool?!
"Are you alright, Shiyu?" Lu Xiao looked at her worriedly. Although Huang Shiyu was smiling, she knew without a doubt that she was feeling terrible inside.
"I'll give Li Xingzhou a call..."
Before Lu Xiao could finish speaking, Huang Shiyu interrupted her, leaving only one sentence: "I'm fine. Please keep this trophy for me. I want to be alone. You should go back and rest too. You've had a long day. Get a good night's sleep. You still have a lot to do tomorrow." Then he left without looking back.
Despite feeling deeply saddened and holding her breath, Huang Shiyu still managed to persuade her to go home and rest early. That's just the kind of person she is. No matter what happens, she always appears calm and collected in front of others, but in reality, she is delicate and soft-hearted and cannot remain indifferent to everything.
What are you going to do now, Shigure?
Why didn't Li Xingzhou just tell Huang Shiyu directly back then? She knew he liked Huang Shiyu, but she really couldn't understand why someone who loved another so much would do something to make their lover sad. Could it be that he had some unspeakable secret?
Lu Xiao watched Huang Shiyu's departing figure reflected by the streetlights on the asphalt road. She knew that Huang must be feeling very sad at the moment, but she also knew that Huang needed her own space, so she did not chase after her.
On the other side, Huang Shiyu wasn't lying to Lu Xiao when she said she wanted to be alone. She did find a place where she could smoke, leaned against the wall, and quietly puffed out smoke, taking a deep breath to calm herself down.
She feared that her remaining rationality would overcome her emotions and cause her to do something bad. Everyone says that the smell of tobacco can relieve irritability, and she has always felt this deeply.
Just as she felt her anger subside a little, she turned around and saw Li Xingzhou leaning against the car door not far away. Although she couldn't see very clearly because of her astigmatism, she was sure that this person was Li Xingzhou. Thinking about the equipment auction today, she felt even angrier. She flicked her cigarette ash and walked over to him.
Just a few steps away from him, her vision gradually cleared, and she saw Li Xingzhou with his hands in his pockets, head down, also smoking. Unlike her, Li Xingzhou had the cigarette in his mouth but hadn't lit it, as if he simply wanted to satisfy his craving.
Huang Shiyu looked at Li Xingzhou, her eyes fixed on him. With each step she took forward, a question arose in her mind.
"Who said they would stay by my side no matter what, whether it's a raging storm or a torrential downpour?"
"And who told me that you should fly high and not fall?"
"Li Xingzhou, I have taken your words to heart."
"But what about you?"
"I trusted you so much, but you've been lying to me all along..."
"Saying he liked her and loved her was all a lie, just like when her mother left saying she was going out to earn money to buy her pretty dresses and shoes—it was all a lie!!!"
"Big liar..."
But when she went through everything that had happened between them since they met, she couldn't erase the fact that this big liar had done so much for her.
If only time could have stopped back then...
She stared blankly at Li Xingzhou.
Seeing the shoes that had suddenly entered his field of vision, Li Xingzhou looked up and met Huang Shiyu's overly deep gaze.
For some reason, that cold and distant gaze made his heart sink. He felt that Huang Shiyu was a little different from usual, as if he was about to get angry at any moment.
Huang Shiyu twitched the corners of her mouth, smiled at him, and said without any pleasantries, "Lu Xiao told me that you planned to have Qixing bid for that batch of equipment from the very beginning. Li Xingzhou, are you kidding me?!"
Li Xingzhou was stunned for a moment, and at the same time, the cigarette he was holding fell to the ground.
Huang Shiyu's words came out of nowhere. Although he knew that the truth would eventually come out, it came so fast that he was caught off guard.
"Li Xingzhou, do you know how much effort I put in, how many people I contacted, to get this equipment?" She stared at Li Xingzhou, her eyes bloodshot, no longer the nonchalant person she had been in front of Lu Xiao. "If I were less skilled, I could accept it, I could accept my fate, but why did you do this? Why were you the one who handed me the knife?!"
She was angry about it, and also very surprised.
She simply couldn't understand why Li Xingzhou would do this!
Li Xingzhou met her shocked and disappointed gaze, his breath caught in his throat. Although he wanted to ignore it, he couldn't, and he felt an overwhelming sense of unease. "Listen to me, Shiyu," he said, "as an investor, I can tell you with certainty that while acquiring this batch of equipment is the easiest thing, implementing it is the most difficult part. Chips aren't easy to make in a short time. I know you really want Xinyu Xinsheng to go public quickly, but Huang Shiyu, you have to trust me. I definitely won't harm you."
Won't it hurt her?
Li Xingzhou, do you even know what she went through to get this equipment?
For a moment, Huang Shiyu didn't know what to say. She looked at Li Xingzhou without speaking immediately, whether she was thinking about what to say or waiting for Li Xingzhou to continue his explanation.
Li Xingzhou didn't say anything, just stared at her, watching her furrow her brows, her eyes filled with a mixture of anger and resentment, and upon closer inspection, a hint of grievance mixed in. Just one glance made him feel breathless.
"Did you plan this from the day you transferred the shares?" Huang Shiyu chuckled self-deprecatingly. "Were you extremely pleased with yourself for watching the fish take the bait so easily?"
Li Xingzhou took a deep breath, sincerely apologized to her, and explained the reason, "It was wrong of me to keep this from you, there was a reason, please let me explain, actually I originally wanted to tell you..."
Huang Shiyu interrupted him before he could finish speaking, staring intently at him, her voice growing increasingly tense, her chest tight, "But you never said a word from beginning to end, even Lu Xiao knew, but I was the only one who didn't know, do you think it's fun to play me like this?"
He now finally understood what it felt like to shoot himself in the foot, but at that critical juncture, he had no better option. Li Xingzhou gave a bitter smile. "No, I did all this for your own good. Do you know that developing your own chips isn't that simple? It's not just about acquiring this batch of equipment. The subsequent funding is an astronomical figure, a bottomless pit. You'll be bankrupt by then, do you know that?"
He has worked abroad for so many years, and while he may not have much else, his work experience is invaluable. He simply wanted to use his experience to help her mitigate risks.
"For my own good? For my own good, you're keeping it from me? You're treating me like a fool?" Huang Shiyu finally couldn't control her emotions and yelled at him, "The reason I agreed to let you take pictures of that batch of equipment for me is because I like you, so I trust you."
She watched as the cigarette between her fingers flickered and reignited in the howling night wind, then, without hesitation, she raised her hand and crushed the cigarette butt against his chest, pressing it down hard. She laughed as she demanded, "Do you know how I feel right now?"
Li Xingzhou stared at her, stunned, for several seconds. Then he looked away, lowered his eyes, and looked at her fingertips, which were digging deep into her skin. He opened his mouth, but before he could answer, he heard Huang Shiyu's voice, filled with overwhelming anger and despair. His heart felt as if it were being squeezed by an invisible hand, and with each passing word, he felt increasingly suffocated.
"My whole body and heart feel like they're being burned by fire, it hurts so much I want to die." Huang Shiyu looked at him with red eyes, her hands still moving, a hole the size of a fingernail had already been rubbed into the chest of Li Xingzhou's suit jacket. "Do you really like me? Or are you still remembering what happened back then and deliberately taking revenge on me?"
Li Xingzhou let her continue like this, after all, he was the one who made Huang Shiyu so angry, he was the culprit, but the moment he heard Huang Shiyu question his motives, he felt another suffocating pain in his chest, he felt that his suffering was no less than Huang Shiyu's, "Could it be that in your heart I am such a person? Is this what you think of me?"
"You can scold me, you can criticize me, but Huang Shiyu, there's one thing you can't question: my love for you." He suddenly grabbed Huang Shiyu's wrist, and under her bewildered gaze, forcefully pressed her hand holding the cigarette against his chest, completely disregarding the burn on his suit jacket. "I love you. Because I love you, I can't watch you dig your own grave. I understand you better than anyone else, and I know how many years it took you to get to where you are today, how difficult it was. I don't want to see you work so hard only to end up with nothing. Do you understand?"
What kind of logic is this? It's ridiculous. If he really loved her, how could he bear to deceive her?
Huang Shiyu laughed after hearing this, but it was a sarcastic laugh. "Should I thank you? Thank you for being so thoughtful, so thoughtful that you made all the decisions for me without even telling me. What gives you the right to decide my life?! I hate it when people do things behind my back and then claim it's all for my own good." She forcefully shook off Li Xingzhou's grip on her wrist, along with the cigarette in her hand.
Li Xingzhou stood frozen in place, his head bowed, making it impossible to discern his emotions. Even Huang Shiyu, who was standing less than a meter away from him, did not notice his slightly trembling fingers hanging at his sides.
Just as Huang Shiyu was about to turn and leave, Li Xingzhou grabbed her from behind and hugged her tightly, his cheek rubbing against her earlobe. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry..."
He didn't know what was wrong with him. He had clearly thought of a plan before planning this, but when he actually faced this moment, he had no plan at all. It all vanished when he looked at Huang Shiyu. He didn't even know how to explain himself.
Li Xingzhou felt like he was about to collapse, and could only repeatedly apologize to Huang Shiyu.
Huang Shiyu grabbed his arm and tried to push him away, but he was like a towering mountain, unmoving no matter how she pushed or pulled. Instead, she was held even tighter. All she could hear was Li Xingzhou repeatedly saying "sorry." With each word, Huang Shiyu could feel the arms around her tighten slightly, giving her the illusion that she was about to be strangled to death by Li Xingzhou.
"So what?" Huang Shiyu took a light breath, her pushing and pulling motions continuing, her brow furrowed. "You've ruined all my plans, and you think an apology is enough?" After saying that, she didn't expect an answer from Li Xingzhou. Instead, she patted his arm and emphasized, "Alright, I don't want to hear any more of your long explanations. Let go."
Li Xingzhou buried his face in her neck, ignoring her completely, only tightening his arms around Huang Shiyu as if he wanted to embed her into his own body.
Being restrained like this was not pleasant. Huang Shiyu subconsciously twisted his hand, but just as she was about to break free, she stopped in her tracks.
Her neck was warm, not from the scorching heat of summer, but from Li Xingzhou's tears.
He cried.
At that moment, Huang Shiyu's feelings were complicated; she knew it was because she was burned by his tears.
She stared at the arms tightly encircling her, remaining silent for about ten seconds. Then, suppressing the piercing pain in her heart, she forcefully broke free from his embrace, turned around, pointed at him, and gritted her teeth, saying, "What right do you have to cry?! I'm the one who should be crying." Clearly, she was the one who should be crying the most, so why was he crying so miserably?
Cars came and went on both sides of the road, honking their horns incessantly, but a suffocating silence stood between the two.
Li Xingzhou stared blankly at her. He had never seen Huang Shiyu with such bloodshot eyes before. She looked like a trapped beast with no way out and could only gasp for breath. Looking at her, he felt a sharp pain in his heart. Without thinking, he reached out his hand, but Huang Shiyu slapped it away without any mercy.
"And don't follow me, get lost." She didn't turn around again, striding forward, ignoring the burning gaze behind her that seemed to want to etch her into the depths of her soul.
She was afraid she wouldn't be able to handle it; at the very least, she dared not look at Li Xingzhou's tears. Every time she did, she felt pain. She couldn't help but feel sorry for Li Xingzhou as he shed tears, nor could she convince him of his betrayal.
However, her steps were somewhat unsteady, lacking the composure and naturalness she appeared to have.
Only she knows why.
With every step she takes, her sincerity is shattered, and her trust is betrayed.
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Author's Note: I'm sorry everyone, I'm back. It wasn't that I didn't update on purpose, I just really haven't had much time. My senior is graduating soon and needs to take over the experiments quickly, so I've been very busy lately. I often stay in the lab with my roommates until the wee hours of the morning. I'm so busy that I don't even recognize my own family, and my brain cells are practically non-existent. My roommates and I often jokingly call each other "experiment maniacs" (actually, we're just newbies who think about when we can finish and go back to sleep). [Also, if you're a graduate student doing experiments like me, it's best not to stay up so late. I think I stayed up too late last month, and I woke up with a terrible headache. I was so scared that I immediately went to the hospital for a brain CT scan. Luckily, nothing was wrong.]
Then I'll give everyone red envelopes [presented with both hands as an apology]. I apologize again, but I've been revising the story recently, making major changes to some plot points. I feel the writing has improved somewhat, and I'm really sorry [bowing again].
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