Siyu's encouragement
As autumn deepened, most of the leaves on the sycamore trees had already fallen. Lin Weixi and Shen Siyu sat in the stands beside the playground, watching the basketball team practice. Chen Wang was practicing three-pointers, and every graceful arc caused the girls watching on the sidelines to exclaim in surprise.
"When are you going to tell him?" Chen Siyu asked suddenly, his eyes still fixed on the court.
Lin Weixi was so shocked by this question that she almost slid off the stands: "Tell who? Tell what?"
"Come on," Shen Siyu finally turned around with a look of knowing everything, "You know what I'm talking about. You've been staring at him for almost three months, since the start of school."
Lin Weixi felt her cheeks getting hot, and she stammered, "I didn't... I just..."
"Just what?" Shen Siyu moved closer to her and lowered her voice, "Wei Xi, I've been observing for a long time. The way you look at him is exactly the same as the way my cousin looks at her boyfriend."
Lin Weixi lowered her head, her fingers twisting the corner of her clothes unconsciously. This secret had been carefully hidden in her heart for so long, and suddenly it was exposed so bluntly, making her panic and a little relieved.
"It's not shameful to like someone." Shen Siyu patted her shoulder. "Chen Wang is a good person. He has good grades, plays basketball well, and has a good personality. It's normal for you to like him."
Lin Weixi muttered softly: "But there are so many people who like him..."
"So what?" Chen Siyu said nonchalantly, "You're also very good. You won a photography award, your composition was used as a model essay, and you even made it into the top 20 in the last monthly exam. Wei Xi, you really underestimate yourself."
Lin Weixi stared at the court in silence. Chen Wang had just made a beautiful three-pointer and was celebrating with his teammates. In the sunlight, his smile was so dazzling, as if he was born to stand in the center of the crowd.
"I don't dare." Finally, she said softly, "If I were rejected, I might not even be able to be an ordinary student like I am now."
Shen Siyu sighed: "But Weixi, don't you feel uncomfortable like this? You secretly watch him every day and write all your thoughts in your diary. If he never knows, won't you regret it?"
This sentence touched upon Lin Weixi's deepest fear. She was indeed afraid, afraid that when she looked back many years later, she would regret not even having the courage to speak.
"The Christmas ball is coming soon," Shen Siyu's eyes lit up, "This is the best opportunity! You can invite him to be your dance partner."
Lin Weixi widened her eyes in horror: "This is too direct!"
"How about this," Shen Siyu compromised, "On the day of the dance, find a chance to talk to him alone. You don't have to confess directly, just... let him know you exist."
At this time, the whistle for the end of training sounded, and the team members began to pack up. Lin Weixi looked at Chen Wang wiping his sweat with a towel, and her heartbeat accelerated involuntarily.
"I don't dare," she repeated, even more quietly.
Shen Siyu held her hand: "Wei Xi, secret love is a personal matter, but liking someone is not a sin. You deserve to be seen and deserve to be liked."
On the way home, Lin Weixi kept thinking about Shen Siyu's words. Is she really worthy? In front of a dazzling person like Chen Wang, is she really worthy of being seen as ordinary as she is?
That night, she opened her diary and looked at the details recorded over the past three months. From the first glance at each other at the beginning of the school year to every encounter thereafter, every page was filled with cautious heartbeats.
"Siyu is right," she wrote, "If I never say it, I might really regret it. But can I bear the consequences of speaking it out loud?"
After writing this, she walked to the window. The city lights dimmed in the night, and behind each light might be a hidden story. Her secret love was just a tiny, insignificant part of this myriad of stories.
During the break the next day, Shen Siyu came over again: "How is it? Have you thought about it?"
Lin Weixi bit her lip: "Let me think about it."
"Okay," Shen Siyu said helplessly, "but Weixi, remember this: youth is short, but regrets are long."
This sentence was like a stone dropped into the lake of Lin Weixi's heart, stirring up ripples. She was absent-minded the whole morning. In math class, the teacher asked her to answer a question, and she was stunned again.
"Lin Weixi," the teacher frowned, "You haven't been in a good state these days. Are you feeling unwell?"
She blushed and shook her head, catching a glimpse of Chen Wang's concerned gaze. At that moment, she suddenly realized that if she didn't speak out, she might always live in the hypothetical "what if".
After school, she pulled Shen Siyu aside and said, "If I...if I really want to say it, how should I start?"
Shen Siyu's eyes lit up: "That's right! Let me help you plan..."
As night fell, Lin Weixi lay in bed, thinking back to the various ideas Shen Siyu had given her. Some were too exaggerated, some were too contrived, but none of them sounded like something she would do.
Perhaps, confession does not need carefully planned lines and scenes. It should be like her love, simple, sincere, and from the heart.
This realization suddenly calmed her down. No matter the outcome, at least she had tried. Just like the photos she captured, even if they couldn't be made public, they truly existed.
The moonlight poured in through the gaps in the curtains, casting soft shadows on Lin Weixi's face. She gently closed her eyes and made a decision: at the Christmas ball, she would be brave for once. Not for the result, but just to live up to this grand secret love.
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