Chapter 334: We have come to the end of our lives.

Looking at Shen Yanci falling down suddenly, my mind buzzed and suddenly everything went blank!

It wasn't until Shen Yanci grabbed my legs tightly that I came to my senses and involuntarily lowered my head to look at him.

The young man who was once so high-spirited is now spitting blood because he wants to go on vacation with us. He has been too busy to dye his hair recently, and the white hair on his temples is dazzling.

"Yi Yi, in the future... in the future... I may not be able to be by your and the children's side anymore... Forget... Forget the hurt you've suffered. Be brave and accept Pei Shen. He... He is worth... you..."

Shen Yanci, who once wanted to take me with him to die, never imagined that one day, when he felt that he was about to die, he would not take me with him to die, nor would he want me to remember him forever. Instead, he wanted me to be with another man using his last chance to speak.

He knew that I was afraid to love again because of the hurt he had suffered. He wanted me to let go of that hurt, to be able to love bravely again, and to be happy again.

I looked at him and tried to open my mouth, but no sound came out. I just couldn't control my tears and fell.

From the beginning to the end, always, all I wanted was for Shen Yanci to be well.

The person who once left such a deep impression on my heart and who once saved me makes me really want him to live a good life.

Especially don't let anything happen again because of saving me.

But fate is always like this.

Seeing Shen Yanci drop his hands and unable to raise his head after saying this, the two children cried even more heartbreakingly.

Shen Yanci is so good to the two children, so good. He is so good that the two children love their father very much.

Dad said that he had done something very wrong and hurt Mom, so he and Mom did not live together like other children's parents.

They can accept that their parents are not together like other children's parents.

But, they can't accept it. Without a father, they can't...

The brother and sister showed extremely high IQ when they were just over one year old. Normally, they would not cry even if they fell and got a bloody head. They were always fearless. But now, they were crying so hard that they could hardly breathe, but they were so scared that they could only cry.

…

When Pei Shen learned about the earthquake in Country M and rushed over from his nephew's birthday party, Shen Yanci had already been sent to the ICU from the emergency room.

The iron beam was so heavy, so heavy that it smashed his entire body and caused him to bleed profusely.

Especially since he had been seriously injured before.

Therefore, although he was sent to the hospital and received emergency treatment in time, his condition is still very serious and he can only rely on fate and a miracle.

Looking at me standing in front of the glass window of the ICU, looking at the two children who were once very lively and cute, now as quiet as frightened little animals, staying beside me motionlessly, their eyes red and swollen from crying.

Pei Shen's heart ached so much that he didn't know how to describe it.

The more others know there is no hope, the more they will give up. But the more he knows there is no hope, the more attentive he becomes. He is completely sincere not only to me, but also to the children. He is completely heartbroken.

He walked up to me and wanted to say something to me, but it was useless to say anything in this situation. In the end, he could only pat me on the shoulder gently.

Then he bent down and looked at the two children, wanting to take them to rest first.

However, both children shook their heads firmly. Even though they were only three years old, it was time for them to go to bed after being frightened like that for such a long time.

But neither of them wanted to go to sleep or leave. They just wanted to stay here and wait for their father to wake up.

Pei Shen couldn't persuade them, and he knew that I definitely couldn't go to rest, so he stayed with us.

Because Pei Shen has been with the two children all the time, they rely on and trust Pei Shen very much. They used to stay close to me, but after Pei Shen came, they would snuggle in Pei Shen's arms when they were tired.

Pei Shen exuded a strong aura of security. He was always invincible in front of the children, so the children couldn't help but look up at him. "Uncle Pei, my dad will definitely wake up, right?"

Pei Shen looked at them like that, "Of course!"

In the past, anything Pei Shen said was possible, would work, or would be possible, was definitely possible.

This calmed the two children's panicked hearts a little, and they curled up in Pei Shen's arms, snuggling tightly.

Pei Shen looked at them who were so lively and active on weekdays, fearless and even wishing to tear the sky apart. So many people took turns to accompany them, and they were all tired, but they were still very energetic. Now, they looked so listless. Pei Shen couldn't help but hugged them tightly with heartache.

Even though they are rivals in love, he really wants Shen Yanci to get through this and live well.

Even if he survived and lived happily with their family of four, giving him no chance at all, he still wanted Shen Yanci to live well.

Pei Shen is really not a good person. In the past, he was the person who believed that there was no such thing as true love. In the past, he never imagined that he, the person who least believed in true and pure love in the world, would one day love so purely.

The doctor said that the golden period is 72 hours. If Shen Yanci can wake up within 72 hours, he will wake up. If he cannot wake up, the best outcome is that he will become a vegetable.

However, the probability of death is 90%, so let us be mentally prepared.

I don't know how I responded to the doctor.

I just felt my mind was buzzing and blank.

I don’t know, I don’t know. If Shen Yanci never wakes up again, how should I tell my two children? How can I make them less sad?

Although they are only three years old, they are too smart and already understand a lot. It is impossible to lie in front of them.

When I came to my senses and realized what I was thinking just now, I suddenly felt that I was very cruel.

Shen Yanci got into trouble just to save me, but when I heard that he might never wake up again, the first thing I felt was not the pain that I couldn't bear, nor the pain, nor the desire for him to live like crazy.

The first thing I thought about was how to prevent the children from being so sad.

Although I felt sad and painful about Shen Yanci's accident, I really don't love him as much as before.

…

Shen Yanci did not wake up within the golden 72 hours.

He became a vegetable, lying on the hospital bed unable to move.

He fell asleep and couldn't wake up, and the children's liveliness and activity seemed to have fallen asleep as well. They changed from being lawless little devils to being quiet and obedient children who only wanted to accompany their dad and tell him stories so that he would wake up earlier every day.

The well-behaved ones don’t even look like children.

No matter how much a mother loves her children, there will be times when she gets exhausted and has to deal with the excessive energy and busy schedule of her children. I am no exception.

In the past, when I was exhausted by them, I couldn't help but wish they could be quieter.

Now seeing them become so well-behaved and quiet, I feel so heartbroken. I would rather they were naughty and tired me to death than see them become like this.

But no matter how I counseled and guided them, even consulting a psychiatrist, it was of no use.

Not only did they not slowly recover from the shock of their dad turning into a sleeping prince as time passed, but they also did not regain their childish nature and return to their previous lively and active self.

On their fourth birthday, they made a wish: one wanted to become a super scientist and the other wanted to become the best doctor in the world. They hoped to combine technology and medicine to wake up their father in the future.

Other people’s children don’t want to study and their families become in chaos when they start to study, but they always urge me to find various teachers for them.

A child who is only four years old doesn’t think about how to play every day, but studies hard and tries hard to grow up faster.

I don’t want them to live such a heavy life, I don’t want them to not even have a childhood, but no matter what I try, it’s useless.

One bad thing about having children who are too smart is that they can easily see through what I am thinking.

They didn’t want me to worry about them anymore. They looked at me and said, “Mom, don’t worry about us. Don’t think our lives are too hard. If it weren’t for Dad, we would have died a long time ago.”

"Compared to death, we are much better now. Mom, please be happy. We are doing well the way we are now."

They are right. Compared to losing their lives, what they have now is really good.

But as a mother, you always want your children to live a better life.

But when I look at them, I know clearly that if I want them to unload the heaviness in their hearts and grow up happily, Shen Yanci must wake up and be fine.

In addition to the children visiting Shen Yanci and talking to her every day, I would also visit Shen Yanci whenever I had time.

Because of the meticulous care, although Shen Yanci had been lying in bed for more than a year, he looked almost the same as when he was fine. His face was still so handsome that the nurse who came to check on him forgot to look away.

Such a young and handsome face seems very inconsistent with his gray hair, which is not yet dyed as it should be.

Looking at his growing white hair, I somehow remembered what his confidant, Special Assistant Li, said to me.

He said that Shen Yanci's hair turned white overnight because he thought he had a relationship with Song Yan.

He said, Madam, I don’t know, I really don’t know how deep the love must be to turn your hair white overnight in pain just because you think you have had sex with another woman.

He doesn't know, and I don't know either.

I don’t know how Shen Yanci’s hair turned white overnight. It’s even more exaggerated than what is shown on TV.

He could hurt me like that.

Assistant Li is truly the most loyal person to Shen Yanci. He even treats Shen Yanci better than Shen Yanci treats himself.

When Shen Yanci stopped begging me for forgiveness, Special Assistant Li came to beg me, saying that their president had done a lot of wrong things before, but he was really deceived and he really knew he was wrong. He even risked his life for me several times.

Everyone makes mistakes, so they begged me to give their president another chance for the sake of their two children.

I have longed for my parents' love since I was a child but never received it. I once swore that if I didn't want children, I wouldn't have them. If I did have children, I would do my best to give them the greatest happiness.

Let them have parents who love them the most.

So, even though I didn't want to have anything to do with Shen Yanci anymore, I never stopped Shen Yanci from looking after the children. I also let him take care of the children.

I have also thought about it. When the children grow up and realize that their family is different from other families and want their parents to be together, should I reunite with Shen Yanci in order to give the children a healthy family?

Although I didn't want to do this, I loved my children more and more and felt that I could do this for them.

I am very lucky. My children are very sensible and love me very much. After they understand that our family is different from other families, no matter how much they like their father, they always put my happiness first and never ask me to get back together with their father for them.

They are really, really nice. They are so nice that I really want them to grow up happily and without worries.

After having all the hair dyeing supplies prepared.

I sat down in front of the hospital bed and talked to Shen Yanci while helping him dye his gray hair black strand by strand.

Looking at Shen Yanci, no matter what I said or how I touched him, he didn't react.

Thinking of the two children who are working harder every day, I couldn't help but tear up. "Shen Yanci, wake up, wake up quickly. When you wake up, we can be together again. I know you want it too, and you really want your children to grow up happily and without worries."

"Can we grow up happily together with them? Wake up and let our family of four be well... Please..."

Shen Yanci's perspective...

After I said that I wanted Yi Yi to be with Pei Shen and fell into darkness, I really felt that I could not survive and I would never be able to be with them again.

I felt reluctant, but not unwilling. I even felt that a damned person like me would finally die.

When we met again in college, Yi Yi always thought that I had long forgotten that I had saved her. In fact, I hadn't. I didn't say that I had saved her, but I didn't want her to be with me just because I saved her life.

I knew her long before I saved her.

It was a chemistry competition in junior high school. I had always been the best in chemistry in the school, and I thought I would definitely win the gold medal in that competition. Unexpectedly, I actually lost to her.

Being young and arrogant, I felt that I should never lose, especially to a girl, so I couldn't help but pay attention to her. It was not an accidental coincidence that I saved her from drowning. I saw her walking towards the beach from the car and followed her.

I know very well what a good person she is.

But when Su Yurou said that she was with me just to snatch away my childhood sweetheart and make her suffer, and that everything between us was her careful calculation, I still believed it.

Because I love her too much, and this kind of love makes me too scared. I am afraid that if she is not as sincere as I think, and she does not really love me, and if everything between us is really planned by her, what should I do?

After all, my father has been so good to me and loves me so much since I was a child. Really, if I want the stars in the sky, he will find a way to pick them for me.

The person who loved me so much, who made me believe that he would never betray me even if everyone in the world betrayed me, actually never had any true love for me.

I really can't believe my intuition, I'm really scared...

The more I love, the more I fear.

This kind of fear made me feel like my eyes were covered with paper, making me make one mistake after another.

I know that if I say it's because I love you too much, you will laugh at me and say that if it's true love, you won't be willing to hurt someone.

It's not true love if you're willing to hurt someone.

In this world, there are tens of thousands of kinds of people and tens of thousands of kinds of love. She is a good person. Her love has been selfless from the beginning. She loves me, and no matter how much her love goes, she will not bear to hurt me.

But I am a selfish person, and my love is even more selfish. I am not the kind of person who will be fine if you are well. I give my all to love her, and if she hurts me, I will drag her to hell!

With this mentality, I took wrong steps one after another. Even though I knew that she minded me and Su Yurou, I still wanted to protect Su Yurou everywhere and make her feel pain.

This kind of deliberateness makes me more and more accustomed to ignoring her, treating her coldly and hurting her.

Gradually, he felt that he was not being cold to her, and that everything was her fault. He got used to protecting Su Yurou subconsciously no matter what happened.

Until her overflowing love for me is completely consumed.

I know that she will never forgive me, because even I cannot forgive myself.

People like me deserve to die!

It would be great if I died.

But, when I heard how much the children wanted me to live, and how hard they tried to grow up for me, I didn’t want to die.

Especially when I heard my daughter crying so softly and begging me to wake up, my heart felt like it was being torn apart. That was my precious daughter whom I loved so much and held in my hands!

Normally, I can't bear to see her pout or be unhappy at all, how could I, how could I make her cry so sadly!

How could I let her think that I died to save them, and that I would not have died if it weren't for them? How could I let her have a shadow in her heart and prevent her from growing up happily and without worries!

I deserve to die, but I want to live so badly. I really, really want to survive.

I really want to hug my babies again.

I really want to.

Maybe it's true that the saying goes, harm lasts for a thousand years.

I am alive again...

After waking up, Yi Yi said that she wanted to remarry me and to be with me, so that her children could grow up happily and carefree.

I was so overwhelmed by this sudden happiness that I couldn't believe that I was really alive.

I thought all this was just a fantasy before I die.

Because I knew clearly that no matter what, she would never forgive me and would never love me again.

I wanted to pinch myself and twist myself to wake myself up from this fantasy, but in the end, I didn't move.

Even if this is just a fantasy, I want to continue fantasizing like this...

I long so much, long for her, my children and I to grow old together.

I can use my whole life to atone for my sins.

Pei Shen's perspective...

I stood outside the ward door, watching Yi Yi holding Shen Yanci's hand, begging him to wake up, saying that as long as he could wake up, she would reconcile with him and accompany him as the children grow up.

I knew I had absolutely no chance.

I felt uncomfortable, so uncomfortable that I even couldn't breathe at one point.

But I didn't feel unwilling and I didn't want to destroy anything.

Because I also want my two children to be as happy as before, and I don’t want them to study so hard.

They are both such good little angels, they should live the happiest, carefree and beautiful life in the world!

When I came to my senses and realized what I was thinking, I couldn't help but laugh.

I laughed at myself and wondered when I became such a kind and loving person.

She actually feels so sorry for her rival's children and wants her rival to be well.

Obviously, I am a born cold-blooded bad guy!!!

When I was just born, a fortune teller said that I was born with bad luck and would not be a good person when I grew up.

In fact, I was born with bad luck. My parents, brother and sister-in-law died. I am really not a good person.

I have been very scheming since I was very young. Although my brother and sister-in-law were sincere to me, I never believed their sincerity. I was afraid that they wanted me dead behind my back, so I was full of calculations towards them.

It was not until they died without hesitation to save me that I believed in their sincerity.

But it's too late...

I even killed my own brother and sister-in-law who loved me so much. In this world, apart from my nephews and nieces, is there anything else worth my care?

Over the years, I have used everything I could to get to where I am today.

My life is dark, my hands are dirty, and my heart is black.

I never thought about anything other than wanting to give my nieces and nephews the best life and a business empire at its peak.

Until the day he was rescued on the island.

That was the first time I felt warmth in my long dark life, and I wanted to hold on to that warmth.

I once laughed at Pei Ye for being too persistent, but just because he had been illuminated by the light for a moment in the darkness, he couldn't let go.

I don't know how there could be someone in this world who is so stupid and obsessed with love.

Never thought.

He will let go one day.

As for me, who made fun of him, I never let it go.

Someone like me who is so scheming and only thinks about myself in everything.

I really don't want to be unable to let go of a woman, especially when I know there is no chance.

My reason, everything I have, tells me that I should let go completely and move on.

But, I just can't move forward.

I always tell myself, next year, if Shen Yanci is still so nice to Qiao Yi, I will let it go completely.

But, year after year, Shen Yanci has always been so good to Qiao Yi, and their family of four has always been so happy year after year.

But I still can't let it go, year after year.

Even when I was ninety, Shen Yanci and Qiao Yi both had gray hair, and I was about to die, I still couldn't let go.

I don’t know, maybe I’m just a bad person and have done too many bad things in my life.

I was born to have whatever I want, but the only thing I want most is...

I spent my whole life trying to get it.

I think so much.

How I wish I could grasp that warmth, even if it’s just for one day, just for a moment.

But even though I have unlimited wealth and can get whatever I want, I just can't get this moment.

Sometimes I really hate Shen Yanci.

I don't know how he could be so good to Yi Yi later, when he was so stupid, so arrogant, and didn't cherish anything he got. He made me feel inferior to him. I don't know how he could be like this.

It's still the same day after day, only each day is better than the last, there is no day of boredom.

Year after year, there was never a moment of slacking off, not even a single opportunity was given to me.

But, I couldn't help but feel relieved. I was relieved that he had been good to Yi Yi for decades, making her happy, free and joyful every day for the rest of her life.

I just watched her, and her family of four, day after day, year after year, until the end of their lives.