Chapter 7
Li Fuquan recalled that he had kept his head down the entire way, his eyes fixed on the ground. He still couldn't count the number of times, but he knew it took him a long time to climb the long steps.
The carvings on the stone steps were simple depictions of dragons and phoenixes, yet they vividly displayed the majesty of the emperor's residence. Thinking of the designs, he felt that the descriptions he had heard in the village were mostly base fantasy. As they sat together, they could only imagine the vastness of the emperor's palace, unaware that the stone steps within were meticulously carved, or that the beams and pillars within the halls were inlaid with gold and jade.
The sun slowly set, and the palace lights were already lit, illuminating his residence as well. Li Fuquan received his evening meal. The carved bowl was filled with broth, and at least it was better than what he had eaten at the palace a few days ago.
He cleared the dishes and lay back on the couch to touch the uniform that had just been distributed today. His fingertips slid down along the fabric, which was even more comfortable to the touch than the new clothes that the steward had given them before.
Li Fuquan remembered what the teacher who had taught them for a month had said, and now he felt that the good life he talked about was not a lie. In Chang'an City, in the huge palace, the emperor lived a good life day after day, and they only needed to serve the master well and could also follow behind to pick up some meat scraps to eat.
He got out of bed and opened the window, still unaccustomed to the incense burning in the hall. He glanced up at the incoming autumn breeze. Chang'an was still cloudless tonight. Li Fu counted eight or nine stars before finally gazing at the crescent moon. It seemed no different from what he'd seen elsewhere, like the night he'd stolen chickens and roasted them, the night the merchant had tied them up and taken them to Chang'an, and the night he'd felt the pain of castration and the half-month it took before he could stand up on his own without help.
The moon in the palace was also cleft in the sky, just like the moon at night. He laughed at his own thoughts. In terms of good days, he could not compare with the emperor and those nobles, but the emperor seemed unable to make the moon in the sky change from crescent to full in one night, unless he prayed to gods or ghosts.
Li Fuquan lay back on the couch, thought for a moment, and then tucked the wooden plaque beside his pillow back into his arms. Who knew if what the steward said was true or not? But he had been carrying it with him for almost six months and even remembered the engravings on it. He kept it with him as a keepsake. Who knew he would meet someone like him who had come from the mansion, besides Zhao Cai?
This was also the first time he slept alone on such a wide couch, and there was no one next to him who would shiver or talk in his sleep in the middle of the night. He was a little uncomfortable with it, but he also thought it was because the palace was too big.
But the palace was even quieter than the mansion. The wind had blown away the dead leaves from the trees in the palace, and he could not even hear the chirping of insects. He tossed and turned, unable to sleep, and could only open his eyes to look at the on lights.
Back in the palace, servants rarely came to light the lamps, and even when they did, they only lit a single candle, which would be blown out by the strong wind at night. Now, all the lights in the palace were oil lamps, and faint figures could be seen coming and going to refill the lamps. He slowly closed his eyes and fell into a light he had never seen before, ready to wait until tomorrow, and also to wait until the good day everyone told him would come.
The palace clock, marking the passing hours, happened to make a sound as drops of water fell. Li Fuquan changed into the clothes he'd worn yesterday, tightening his waistband before carefully examining the sparsely carved patterns. He naturally didn't recognize them, but the presence of patterns must have been a symbol of status. As long as he could eat and drink well in the palace, serving anyone was fine.
The lady who lived in the palace did not call him over until noon. Li Fuquan walked slowly to her and bowed. "Madam," he called out according to etiquette, and raised his head to look at her as she agreed.
The man he was serving did not seem to be from the Central Plains. Women from the Central Plains did not speak with ambiguous accents, and when this accent was spoken in a low voice, he could hardly hear what the man meant.
Li Fuquan still responded, his eyes no longer looking at the red flower on his lover's forehead or the jade bracelet on his hand. He was assigned to clean the courtyard every day and look after the winter plum blossoms that the emperor had just appreciated a few days ago.
He followed the maids out of the palace, leaving the wintersweet tree planted in the courtyard, its branches withered and swaying in the autumn wind. Li Fuquan didn't quite get a good look at the man he had just met; his attention was focused on the colorful flower ornaments and jade bracelets, as well as the tone of his voice, which he couldn't quite hear.
He picked up a broom and swept the fallen leaves and dust from the courtyard. He called it cleaning the courtyard; it seemed his assigned position was relatively quiet. There weren't many flowers or plants in the courtyard to begin with, and the wintersweet plant was isolated and set aside. He swept the fallen leaves into the soil and watered it once a day, considering it his daily duty. Any more was occasionally holding a lamp outside the palace at night, ready to greet the emperor.
Li Fuquan felt relaxed in this quiet environment, but also worried about spending his days in the courtyard or outside the palace, with few people to talk to. Only at the end of the month, when he received his salary, could he hear the attendants' idle chatter and realize that his wife wasn't much better off. Of all the emperor's women, she was the only one who could live in a side palace of her own. Of course, her monthly salary was much better than that of the eunuchs.
Only at the end of the month could he see the beloved who lived in the palace again. This time, she wore emerald green jade bracelets on both hands, making her look even thinner. As usual, Li Fuquan lowered his eyes and listened to her continued instructions. He was still exiled to the courtyard, while the maid was fined half her monthly salary.
Li Fuquan turned off the lights. The emperor still hadn't stayed in the side hall tonight. It had been nearly a month and a half since he entered the palace, and while he'd never seen the emperor in person, he'd often seen the maids busily preparing their beloved. He opened the window. It was getting colder, and his casual clothes were no longer enough.
Li Fuquan put on two layers of underwear before climbing onto the bed and covering himself with the quilt. Even though the lights were always on in the palace at night, he still had the habit of opening the window to let in a little breeze, and the meager moonlight also slipped into the palace with the wind. He repeated his daily task of sweeping the dust. Of course, the new and exciting things in the palace were too far away from him. Whenever he heard the gossip, he could only pretend not to hear it.
He finally understood the status and monthly salaries of the women in the palace, but looking at the frail figure of the man in the palace, he felt that it was their proper share. The women in the village were either weaving or working in the fields, so they didn't have to get up before dawn to paint their faces in different shades of red, then wait patiently for His Majesty to summon them or come to the palace. This was their daily routine.
He closed his eyes and thought of the new bracelet he saw today. At least that beloved lady must have seen His Majesty recently and was rewarded again. He didn't have to worry too much about her falling out of favor and sending him to a new place.
Li Fuquan was deep in a dream. Now he could sleep peacefully in the palace. Occasionally he would dream of the fragrance of imperial meals or his own promotion. Every time he woke up, he had a smile on his face, even though he couldn't see it.
On ordinary days, there was no one in the courtyard, let alone anyone who would talk to him. Sometimes, when he wasn't in a hurry to finish his work for the day, he would sit on the ground beside the winter plum tree, looking at the leafless tree, thinking that the emperor's eyesight was not very good. Such a tree had so few leaves, and who knew if it would survive the heavy snow in winter.
He thought of his beloved who had been sitting in the palace for a long time, and he felt that this wintersweet tree was very similar to her, inexplicably similar. Of course, this was not something he thought was certain. After all, he was not the emperor. He would not reward some jade bracelets that were not well matched, nor would he reward a small tree that looked like it had not lived many days for no reason.
Li Fuquan touched the dry bark of a wintersweet tree. After months of watering, he saw only a dwindling number of leaves. With the recent arrival of winter, the tree looked even more withered. He felt that soon he would no longer even have the chance to talk to the tree, and could only continue sweeping the nearly dust-free courtyard.
He scooped up some water and slowly poured it into the soil, watching the fallen leaves rot in the mud. His work for the day was done, so he sat by the palace and waited with his beloved, not knowing when the emperor would arrive.
Li Fuquan received his second month's salary and stuffed the silver and wooden plaque into his pocket, intending to carry them with him every day. Now that he had a regular meal in the palace, and his daily clothes were distributed by the attendants, he felt that life was good enough. He couldn't spend the extra money for the time being, so he stayed alone in the courtyard.
The moon was full tonight, and Li Fuquan had to close the window. New incense was burned in the hall, and the smell was stronger. He was not completely used to it yet, but the north wind in winter was so cold that it made people shiver.
He pulled his outer robe over the quilt and barely felt warm. After the pain, his body was no longer the same. Li Fuquan thought of how he used to run around the village, and felt that the good life he had now was worth the sacrifice. As for the increasingly shrill voice, it was not within his scope of concern.
I only occasionally dream about my bloody lower body or other scenes that can be called nightmares. I should have almost forgotten them after waking up. No one can solve these problems anyway, and I can't solve them myself. It's enough to survive and live a good life. Thinking about more things will only make me unable to sleep at night.
He closed his eyes and slept through the night, waiting for the moon to crescent again, just like his beloved in the palace, waiting for the day when His Majesty would come in.
Perhaps God would occasionally open his eyes. Li Fuquan heard the sound when he was lighting the lamp outside the palace that night. After being stunned for a moment, he informed the maid to get ready to serve the emperor, as his majesty was about to arrive.
He was still holding the lamp outside the hall, and he straightened his waist belt and robe. He felt relieved when he saw that there was nothing wrong. After all, if he made that person unhappy, he would be beheaded.
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