Extra: Ye Xiaoxuan's Past
"Mother……"
In the extreme darkness, Ye Xiaoxuan opened her mouth and murmured.
The corridors in the hospital are always so long.
She sat on a blue plastic chair outside the Department of Gastroenterology, her fingers unconsciously stroking the edge of the examination report.
The report had been folded again and again by her, and the corners were a little rough.
She stared at the "No Smoking" sign on the opposite wall, but her eyes could not focus.
"Excuse me, who are Ms. Liu Xiuying's family members?" The nurse's voice brought her back to reality.
In the clinic, Dr. Wang pushed up his glasses and inserted the CT film into the light box. The black and white images were just a blurry shadow in Lin Xiaoman's eyes, but the small spot that Dr. Wang pointed at seemed to be infinitely magnified.
“Here, see? This shadow on the pancreas.”
Doctor Wang's voice was calm and almost cruel.
"Combined with your mother's symptoms and blood work, we highly suspect a pancreatic neuroendocrine tumor, a relatively rare type."
For a moment, Ye Xiaoxuan felt her throat tighten: "Malignant?"
“Further biopsy is needed to confirm, but judging from the imaging features, it is very likely to be malignant.” Doctor Wang paused, “The progression rate of this tumor varies from person to person, but based on clinical experience...if not treated, the average survival period is about 12 to 18 months.”
18 months. 540 days. 12,960 hours.
When Ye Xiaoxuan walked out of the hospital, the early summer sun was so bright that she couldn't open her eyes. She stood on the steps and looked at the people coming and going - the busy office workers, the caregivers supporting the elderly, the young parents holding their babies. Everyone was so busy, and everyone took it for granted that they had countless tomorrows.
And she had just learned that her mother might not survive next winter.
"Mother……"
She murmured, as if she remembered something, and suddenly realized that the first thing she should think about now was how to hide this from her mother. After all, she had seen many related cases where a healthy person was frightened into becoming sick.
“Buzz—buzz—”
The phone vibrated in her bag. It was a message from the company, a reminder of the creative meeting in the afternoon. Ye Xiaoxuan stared at the screen and suddenly felt that the project names that once made her blood boil became so distant and ridiculous.
After thinking about it, she finally decided to send her mother back home safely.
She called a taxi, gave the company's address, and finally went back to work.
Reality holds no surprises.
The next day, the inspection results were confirmed, confirming the previous conclusions.
Her mother lived in an old neighborhood on the outskirts of the city, and although Ye Xiaoxuan had the key, she still rang the doorbell. The door opened quickly, as if her mother had been waiting behind it.
"Xiaoxuan? Why are you here at this time?" The mother opened her eyes wide in surprise, then frowned, "Why do you look so bad? Are you sick?"
Ye Xiaoxuan opened her mouth, and the words "You're dying" turned around on the tip of her tongue, and finally became: "Mom, I want to take a leave to accompany you on a trip."
At the dining table, her mother poured her a cup of hot tea. Ye Xiaoxuan held the cup, feeling the temperature passing through the ceramic into her palm.
"Why do you suddenly want to travel? You're so busy at work." Her mother sat down opposite her, her eyes full of confusion.
Ye Xiaoxuan had already thought of an excuse: "I'm too tired and want to take a break. I've been saying that I'd go out with you for years, but I never did." She paused, "Let's go to the places you've always wanted to go, Yunnan, XZ, XJ... Let's travel all over China."
The mother's eyes lit up for a moment, then dimmed: "What about your job?"
"I plan to resign." Ye Xiaoxuan said lightly, as if this was not the end of the career she had fought for for six years.
As if she had noticed something, the mother didn't say much and just nodded calmly.
Ye Xiaoxuan looked down at the gradually spreading water stain on the table: "Mom, I love you."
Just these three words made the mother suddenly silent. After a long while, she reached out and covered her daughter's hand: "Okay, let's eat first. Mom made you your favorite crab meat lion head."
Hearing this, Ye Xiaoxuan nodded, not daring to look up at her mother's eyes.
That night, she lay in her childhood bed, staring at the faded star stickers on the ceiling. She opened her email on her phone and began to write a resignation letter. Her finger paused on the screen for a long time, and finally typed only a few simple lines:
"I am resigning due to personal reasons. Thank you for your training and trust over the past six years."
After clicking send, she sent a WeChat message to HR Director Zhang Li: "Sister Li, can we talk tomorrow? I hope to complete the resignation procedures as soon as possible."
Zhang Li quickly replied: "What happened? You are the candidate for promotion to director next week."
Ye Xiaoxuan closed her eyes: "Personal reasons, let's meet and talk."
The next day, she went to the company in the simplest white shirt and black suit pants. When she met her colleagues in the elevator, she smiled and greeted them as usual. On her desk was the unfinished plan from yesterday, and the computer screen was still on the PPT page she had carefully designed.
Zhang Li's office is on the 6th floor. Through the floor-to-ceiling windows, you can see the city skyline.
"What's going on?" Zhang Li motioned for her to sit down. Ye Xiaoxuan took a deep breath and said, "Sister Li, I need to rest. Not changing jobs, not starting a business, but simply... stop."
"Burnout?" Zhang Li frowned. "You can apply for a leave. There's no need to resign."
Sister Li is very good, very good, better than most people she knows, but it's a pity that she has made up her mind and this is not something she can tell her.
“It’s not job burnout.” She shook her head. “I suddenly realized that some things are more important than work.” Ye Xiaoxuan paused and said, “My mother is old, and I want to help her fulfill some of her wishes.”
Zhang Li's expression changed from confusion to understanding. Perhaps... she understood.
"Family reasons? That's understandable. But have you considered the impact of the gap period on your career development? The market environment is not good now, and if you come back, you may..."
"I know." Ye Xiaoxuan interrupted her, "I accept this price."
It took a week to complete the resignation procedures. Handing over work, saying goodbye to colleagues, and cleaning up the desk. On the last day, Ye Xiaoxuan stood under the company building and looked up at the glass and steel behemoth she had dreamed of conquering. The sunlight reflected on the surface of the building made her cry.
The trip started in Yunnan. This was the place my mother had always wanted to go. Ye Xiaoxuan bought the best camera and was determined to record every moment.
On the stone road of Lijiang Ancient Town, the mother looked around excitedly like a child; at the foot of Jade Dragon Snow Mountain, they wrapped themselves in rented down jackets and watched the snow-capped peaks sparkling in the sun; by the Erhai Lake in Dali, the mother tried cycling for the first time, and her laughter drifted far away with the wind.
"Xiaoxuan, look over there!" The mother suddenly pointed to the mountains in the distance, "Does it look like the picture you drew when you were a child?"
Ye Xiaoxuan was stunned for a moment, then she smiled. That was the work she had participated in a painting competition when she was in elementary school, a mountain dyed golden by the sun. Her mother actually remembered it.
…
Her mother was much more perceptive than she had imagined. Initially, she did not want to waste this year, but to choose a suitable time to tell her mother.
But unexpectedly, it is no longer needed.
In an unknown small town in Yunnan, what the mother handed over was not only water, but also a look of understanding.
She made her decision.
…
So they headed west, crossed the Gobi Desert, and arrived at Kanas in Xinjiang. Kanas Lake in autumn is as beautiful as a fairy tale, with the golden birch forest reflected in the blue water. Lin Xiaoman set up a tripod to take pictures of this beautiful scenery.
"Xiaoxuan," the mother suddenly said, "Come, let's take a group photo."
This was the first time my mother asked to be photographed.
Ye Xiaoxuan set the timer and ran back to her mother. Her mother hugged her shoulders with such force that it hurt.
"Smile." said the mother.
The camera clicked, freezing this moment - the mother was smiling brightly, and Lin Xiaoman had tears in her eyes.
That night, in the cabin by the lake, my mother suddenly said, "The proudest thing in my life is that I have a daughter like you."
Ye Xiaoxuan was sorting photos with her head down. Her fingers trembled when she heard this: "Why are you talking about this suddenly?"
"When you get old, there are some things you don't want to say anymore." The mother looked at the lake outside the window. "After your father passed away, you supported me to live. Seeing you succeed in your career, I am happier than anything else."
Her tears hit the camera screen.
"But Xiaoxuan," her mother turned to her, her eyes clear, "if I'm gone one day, you have to promise me that you will live well for yourself and not always sacrifice yourself for others."
Ye Xiaoxuan couldn't hold back any longer and threw herself into her mother's arms and cried bitterly.
…
The trip lasted for ten months. They traveled across most of China, from snow-capped mountains to the sea, from deserts to grasslands. Lin Xiaoman's photo album contains tens of thousands of photos, each of which is a treasure.
But reality is always full of black humor. The miracle did not come. A year later, my mother was declared dead, followed by my own unemployment.
"Excuse me, there is a gap of more than a year in your resume. What did you do?"
In the office, HR held her resume and asked questions.
Ye Xiaoxuan lowered her head, sat in her seat, and said nothing.
In the end, she didn't get the job.
Days passed, and the dead were gone. One day, she finally received an offer from a company called "Xingchen Technology".
One day, on the subway on the way to the company, she changed.
The full text is over.
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