Chapter 120 "If you want revenge, let me be your weapon."...
His long, white fingers, like jade, moved swiftly before her eyes. Jiang Ling'er watched him intently untangle the cloth bandage wrapped around her calves, circle after circle like an unsolvable tangle of yarn. The more she looked, the more her head throbbed with pain. Finally, she couldn't help but grab his hand.
"you……"
Are you hungry?
Ji Yunshu quickly interrupted her, glanced at her with a smile in her peach blossom eyes, and then turned to arrange her favorite dishes.
Jiang Ling'er watched him bustling about, her long eyelashes drooping, her fingertips clenching the brocade quilt in her hands.
She swallowed back the anger she had been about to unleash, only after he placed a small table laden with a sumptuous meal in front of her.
These are all her favorite foods.
...Of course, that's not the point! Jiang Ling'er shook her head and turned her gaze back to Ji Yunshu, re-examining this former bedmate she should have known.
After all, they had been married for six years.
How many six-year periods does one have in a lifetime?
But for six whole years, she never saw through this person.
Ji Yunshu appears to be a gentle and approachable gentleman, but in reality, he is extremely fastidious and has a severe case of mysophobia. He would rather, as the young master of Sun and Moon Fortress, pick up a coarse cloth broom than allow servants to defile their courtyard, and he felt the same way about Jiang Ling'er.
As long as he was with Ji Yunshu, he would do any service himself without relying on others.
He originally refused to eat on the couch, and even when he saw it, a vein would bulge on his forehead even though he was smiling.
However, there are exceptions; they only agree when they are in an extremely good mood.
For example, right now.
Jiang Ling'er watched him pick out the bones from a fish one by one, and finally couldn't help but speak. Her original question, "Why am I here?" was replaced with:
Why did you do that?
His voice was a little hoarse, a mark left by drinking aged liquor.
It hurt a lot, but it also brought me clarity. The chaos in my mind disappeared, leaving only clarity.
Ji Yunshu replied readily: "I was wrong."
He pushed the honey water that soothed her throat towards her, and from somewhere produced a long whip—exactly the same one that Zhao Xiao had destroyed before. He knelt on one knee before her, his beautiful peach blossom eyes gazing at her. He was already thin, and now his gaunt face was slightly sunken, but not unattractive; rather, it accentuated the superiority of his bone structure. Like a... alluring ghost draped in a beautiful human skin.
He shoved the whip into her hand.
"Go ahead and hit me."
Jiang Ling'er frowned and subconsciously gripped the long whip in her hand.
Looking at the person in front of her, who was both familiar and terrifyingly unfamiliar, she felt a headache coming on again.
absurd.
That's absurd.
She pushed Ji Yunshu away, placed the long whip on the table, moved the small table aside, and got off the bed. Only then did she realize that her clothes had been changed. She glanced at them once and then looked away, knowing from the flowing cloud knot tied around her waist that it was Ji Yunshu's doing. Looking around at the familiar yet unfamiliar furnishings, she realized it was Sun and Moon Fortress.
She didn't know how long she had been unconscious, but the fact that they could bring her silently from right under the nose of the world's number one镖师 (bodyguard/escort) to Sun and Moon Fortress, a hundred miles away, clearly indicated a long period of planning. It was obvious that Liu Yirong had also been instructed by him to intentionally poison her wine, get her drunk, and bring her here.
Jiang Ling'er frowned.
trouble.
Jiang Ling'er asked again, she really couldn't understand: "Why did you do this?"
Ji Yunshu seemed even less able to understand. Her long eyebrows furrowed, and she slowly stood up. He was very tall, his slender and long shadow casting a long shadow over her. His head was slightly lowered as he stared at her.
"You are my wife, so naturally I must find you and bring you back."
Jiang Ling'er suddenly felt that the person in front of her was unreasonable. She rubbed her temples, feeling a bit of a headache.
Didn't Mr. Gao tell you?
Those beautiful peach blossom eyes suddenly fell silent upon hearing these words, and his dark pupils, like a viscous swamp, surged toward the person at the center of his gaze. He stepped forward and questioned Jiang Ling'er, his tone tinged with accusation:
What should he tell me?
Jiang Ling'er choked, feeling her head throb even more. She hadn't originally thought Ji Yunshu was a forgetful or even unreasonable person. She opened her mouth, intending to say something, but gave up and went to look for him directly.
Ji Yunshu watched her rummaging through drawers and cabinets, her thin lips pressed into a thin line, and she said softly:
What are you looking for?
Jiang Ling'er didn't answer, but kept searching on her own.
Are you looking for this?
Jiang Ling'er paused in her rummaging, turned around, and saw that Ji Yunshu was indeed holding the divorce agreement she had written herself that day. She slightly raised her eyebrows and was about to take it when she saw Ji Yunshu slowly tear the divorce agreement in front of her.
“I once thought… I thought you were really gone, and I wanted to keep this thing to remember you…” Ji Yunshu said, chuckling self-deprecatingly. He walked to the candlelight, placed the thin piece of paper torn in half on the burning wick, and watched the flames slowly lick away the words he had touched countless times, words filled with regret, hatred, love, and pain, until they finally turned to ashes and drifted to the ground.
"Fortunately, it's not necessary now, don't you think?"
He looked up at her and smiled, but upon seeing her expression, his brow furrowed. He took a step forward, drawing closer to her.
Why aren't you saying anything?
Don't you think so?
"Is that so?"
It was almost like interrogation.
Ji Yunshu smiled at her, but Jiang Ling'er felt a chill run down her spine.
What did he want to ask? Was he asking if she wasn't happy that she was still alive? Of course she was happy.
I still want to ask her if she really wants a divorce?
Jiang Ling'er felt that she had made her point very clearly.
Jiang Ling'er took a deep breath, unwilling to argue with him. She swept away the dishes scattered on the table, took out paper and pen, dipped them in ink, and began to write in a flowing style.
I can just rewrite it; I was indeed in a rush last time.
Moreover, this kind of thing... becomes familiar after one time, but becomes familiar after two.
But before she could utter a single word, her wrist was grabbed.
Do you really have to do this?
His voice was cold.
Jiang Ling'er frowned deeply. She didn't know what Ji Yunshu had fed her, but she couldn't mobilize her internal energy. She tried to break free from Ji Yunshu's hand, but she couldn't. His long, slender, and refined fingers were gripping her like black iron. It seemed that during this time apart, not only had she made considerable progress.
He is too.
Thick ink drips down, staining the paper.
Ji Yunshu released her hand and hugged her from behind, stretching out his long arms to hold her waist tightly.
His chin rested on her neck, and he first sighed deeply as if he had just regained something, then his breath warmed her face.
“You should know that marriage is not a game, it’s not something you can just decide to divorce. I…” The young man paused, then hugged her even tighter, “I don’t want to. I absolutely do not want to divorce you.”
The arms that held her tightly felt like chains, and as the young man's seemingly mild but actually increasingly aggressive words tightened and intensified, Jiang Ling'er even felt a slight pain in her ribs.
"I was wrong, I was really wrong."
“You dislike Tao Niang, so I have expelled her from the manor. There is nothing between us. After all this, can’t you guess? It’s not that I don’t want to tell you, but the old镖头 (bodyguard) being framed for colluding with the Jurchens is a dead end. The reason I kept Tao Niang, who resembles you seven parts, was to protect you. I know that although you are playful, you have a chivalrous heart and would never agree with my actions, or even despise them. But I… have no regrets.”
Jiang Ling'er paused in her struggle, slightly taken aback. She truly hadn't expected that Ji Yunshu had kept Tao Niang... for her sake.
She hadn't expected him to have made plans so early on. And now that she thought about it, the old镖头 (bodyguard/escort) was forced to commit suicide by He Yong and the others. The incident happened suddenly, but he was able to react in time and take her away from the trouble early on...
He must have made plans long ago.
Indeed, he has always been extremely intelligent.
"Don't worry, I never forced Tao Niang. I've already made arrangements for her family..." Seeing Jiang Ling'er's brows relax slightly, a subtle glint flashed in her beautiful peach blossom eyes, and her speech quickened.
"You don't like me learning crooked and unorthodox methods, so I'll never study them again. I'll listen to you, okay?"
“I know you hate me for not telling the old镖头 beforehand… but how do you know I didn’t try my best? Everyone wants the old镖头 dead; only with Father dead can the secret be kept, right? I couldn’t protect him… but I can protect you. My mistake was being arrogant and overconfident. That’s why you were kidnapped by that little poisoner…”
At this point, Jiang Ling'er felt as if the arms binding her were trying to meld her into his very bones. From an angle she couldn't see, Ji Yunshu's exceptionally handsome face was almost distorted, with anger and jealousy seemingly about to break free from his good looks, but it quickly returned to calm.
The breath that had been blowing against her cheek turned scalding hot: "If you want revenge, let me be your weapon."
As he finished speaking, his thin lips placed a long-awaited, passionate kiss on her warm neck, then trailed downwards...
The cool, thin lips sent a shiver through Jiang Ling'er, and her patience reached its limit at that moment.
"...I don't hate you!"
The person who had buried their face in her neck paused and stopped moving.
Jiang Ling'er slowly exhaled:
"I have never hated you."
After saying those words, it was as if a huge boulder had fallen. Even though the iron wall wrapped around her waist felt like a chain binding her, Jiang Ling'er felt incredibly relaxed.
Jiang Ling'er felt an unprecedented sense of joy and enlightenment. In that instant, she suddenly realized that it was the right thing for Ji Yunshu to have brought her here.
They need a face-to-face conversation, a conversation between just the two of them.
“You have done nothing wrong to me. We were husband and wife, and you have done so much for me... You have done everything you could.”
Having experienced so much, Jiang Ling'er is no longer the same person she once was. The death of the old镖头 (bodyguard/escort) involves the imperial court and high temples, and is by no means a simple matter that can be resolved within the martial arts world.
She admitted that if she were in Ji Yunshu's position, she might not have done as well as him. He was not only her husband, but also the young master of Sun and Moon Fortress. Husbands and wives are like birds in the same forest; when disaster strikes, they fly away separately. He knew the stakes involved, yet he still searched for her to the ends of the earth, showing his utmost devotion and making their marriage worthwhile. Therefore, she couldn't and shouldn't selfishly involve him in this.
He used the entire Sun and Moon Fortress as a bargaining chip; how is she supposed to repay him?
As husband and wife, his words are enough.
He has his own vast world, and she has hers.
Since they are no longer on the same path, they should make a decision sooner rather than later.
She didn't hate him; she only hated herself for realizing things too late and for being too vulnerable.
Ji Yunshu listened quietly, remained silent for a long time, and then suddenly smiled.
He let go of her.
Her voice was a little hoarse, as if it held a lingering illness, like a feather tickling Jiang Ling'er's earlobe:
"I'd rather you hit me, scold me...hate me right now than pretend to be an adult like this."
He let out a sneer, his contempt obvious.
Jiang Ling'er paused, turned around, frowned, and was almost ready to roll up her sleeves: "What do you mean?"
Seeing her like this, Ji Yunshu smiled genuinely for the first time tonight:
"This is the real you. You're not reasonable or understanding at all."
Jiang Ling'er flew into a rage: "You..."
Ji Yunshu interrupted her: "Jiang Ling'er, we've been married for six years, have you ever really loved me?"
Jiang Ling'er paused, her long eyelashes trembled, her almond-shaped eyes stared at him, and her brows slowly furrowed.
"Or should I say, do you even know what 'like' means? No...no." Ji Yunshu rubbed her forehead with two fingers, looking rather troubled. "I know. I know I'm just a tool you use to appease the old镖头's pressure to get married. I should ask you, do you really even care about me?"
The young man lowered his two fingers, his dark eyes gazing into her almond-shaped eyes, and he approached her step by step:
"Who am I in your eyes, Jiang Ling'er? Am I a living, breathing person? Or am I some poor scholar who can be appeased with a single gold leaf, the bastard child of a lowly prostitute?"
Under that gaze, as thick and unyielding as ink, Jiang Ling'er instinctively stepped back, her brows furrowing even deeper.
“You’ve never taken me seriously.” Ji Yunshu looked at the girl who was truly hateful and slowly grinned. “Jiang Ling’er, you’re no different from those who look down on me and my mother.”
“I know perfectly well that you want something and then discard it like trash once you get it. I know perfectly well that you are such a fickle and unruly person… I know perfectly well.”
Jiang Ling'er leaned against the table and chair behind her and sat down involuntarily. The young man placed his hands on either side of her, pressing down on her, looking down at her. His peach blossom eyes met her almond eyes, at a distance where they could hear each other's breath, his gaze fixed on her, each word distinct:
"But I still like you, hopelessly like you. Tell me, what should I do?"
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