Qin Bai thought it was terrifying enough that Feng Yaoyao and Luo Qingyan were going there tomorrow.
As a result, Shen Guaiguai gave him a big one.
After seeing the three of them upstairs, he was about to turn and leave when his aloof little face peeked out.
"noob."
"Hmm, what's wrong?"
Can I come to see you tomorrow?
"ah?"
The moment Qin Bai hesitated, a hint of disappointment immediately appeared in Shen Guaiguai's eyes.
"Oh, so it doesn't work then?"
His eyes were downcast, and even his tone of voice lacked vitality.
"That's not what I meant. I just thought you'd be staying home with Aunt Yao."
Qin Bai quickly tried to explain, otherwise he felt like he had committed an unforgivable crime, the kind that would soon lead to his execution.
Shen Guaiguai immediately looked up, her eyes regaining their light, like the bright moon outside the window.
Qin Bai: (??????) Eh????
Is this little thing me acting?
No, are they all this good at this nowadays?
She starts making trouble whenever something doesn't go her way. It turns out that Shen Guaiguai wasn't like this before.
Even if you look cute now, you can't keep playing like this forever.
"Okay, I'll come see you tomorrow."
"I......"
"good evening."
Goodnight.
Qin Bai's temples were throbbing incessantly.
You must have drunk too much tonight. You should go home and get some sleep. Maybe you'll be fine by tomorrow.
When Cheng Jing got home, she was sitting on the sofa watching TV.
"Mom, I'm home."
Qin Bai felt terrible, and his voice sounded dejected.
"Hey, what's going on?"
"It's okay, it's okay, I'm going to sleep."
Cheng Jing frowned slightly as she looked at his dejected back.
He knows his own son best; he's probably going through something upsetting.
Squeak~~~
The door opened.
Cheng Jing sat on the edge of the bed, looked at Qin Bai who was half drunk and half awake, and sighed.
"Tell me what's wrong."
"No, don't worry."
"Son, would you like to hear what Mom has to say about you?"
"Hehe, Mom, what's going on? Are you starting to take the sentimental approach because you feel you can't beat me anymore?"
The cold white incandescent light bulb conjured countless shapes in Qin Bai's eyes.
Even after closing my eyes, all I could see were lingering shadows.
Cheng Jing reached out and tidied his disheveled hair, her eyes filled with heartache.
"Actually, you're good in every way, except you're too cold. You're cold to people, and you're cold to yourself."
Qin Bai's smile froze for a moment: "No, that's not true. Look how enthusiastic I am with them."
“I raised you, I know you better than you do.”
Cheng Jing shifted her body closer, picked up Qin Bai's head and placed it on her lap, gently massaging his temples.
"Over the years, you've seen and learned a lot, and you've learned to hide your feelings. Over time, you've become numb."
“I know what your wish has been all these years. Now that your wish has been fulfilled, the emptiness in your heart makes you want to grasp something and live a good life.”
"These people just so happen to appear in your life at the same time, so..."
Qin Bai waved his hand haphazardly, as if he was anxiously denying something.
"Mom, you're wrong. They're not some kind of lifeline. I like them a lot, really, really a lot."
Cheng Jing increased the pressure on her fingers.
"I'm not saying you don't like them; I know you like them a lot."
"That's why you want to do everything to the best of your ability in order to balance your current situation."
"But have you ever thought about the fact that a person's energy is limited? You've become so indifferent that you don't even care about your own feelings."
"In other words, you're trying to use these to prove that you want to live and that you can live."
Qin Bai's smile froze as the alcohol rapidly spread through his body, making him dizzy.
Cheng Jing tightened her grip on his fingers, trying to keep Qin Bai awake and focused.
"There are many goals in life. You can't let the constraints of the first half of your life prevent you from enjoying the tranquility of the second half."
"You'll never know whether you're facing an abyss or heaven if you don't take that first step."
"Don't try to balance things by rejecting your inner thoughts. Just let everything take its natural course and follow your heart."
Qin Bai twisted his body and lay on his side on his mother's lap, keeping his face in darkness.
He remained silent.
Cheng Jing sighed.
“Son, these days I’ve been trying to find my own way to help you understand the meaning of life.”
"Let this home feel more like a home, and let's not let gratitude bind our emotions as mother and son."
"So, hitting you, scolding you, and kicking you out are what a mother should do."
Qin Bai: ? ? ?
He suddenly sat up.
"No, Mom, you wrote an 800-word college entrance exam essay just for this one sentence, to make the abuse you've suffered these past few days seem more reasonable, so you can feel a little better."
Cheng Jing was still trying to compose herself when this sudden change left her somewhat bewildered.
Seeing the puzzled look on Qin Bai's face, he burst out laughing.
It's all ruined.
The atmosphere was completely ruined.
You really can't waste a single bit of that mouth of yours.
He ruined everything we had a good talk with just one sentence.
Qin Bai continued to ask, "And from what I see, you seem to want a grandson, which is quite a big step."
"Get lost, I can't be bothered to talk to you, I'm going to sleep."
Cheng Jing turned and left, her face flushed with anger.
Bang.
The door was tightly closed.
Qin Bai watched his mother's retreating figure and then lay back down on the bed.
No one knows a child better than their mother.
The wisdom summarized by the older generation is always so insightful.
At the Chu-Han River boundary, carriages and horses crossed the dividing line.
A single blow from the General caused Qin Bai to lose his composure.
He dared not listen to what followed; every word was piercing and unbearable, so he chose to interrupt.
After curing his mother's illness, Qin Bai did indeed lose his purpose in life.
Just when he thought he could finally enjoy life, he discovered he no longer had that ability.
It's often said that Luo Qingyan has a serious mental illness.
Qin Bai was no different.
His busy life over the past decade has made him indifferent to the world.
He wanted to find something that could hold him back, something to keep him going.
Shen Guaiguai always thought that Qin Bai had saved her.
In fact, they are Qin Bai's life-saving medicine.
Therefore, Qin Bai refused to let go of any of them, because letting go of anyone would be like dividing his own life.
......
......
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