Chapter 110: I am looking forward to my death after taking care of you. Who do you want to marry again?
Lu Tingwan twirled her sleeves with her fingertips, annoyed by his unreasonableness. "Do we have to wait until you're dead before we can divorce?"
Cheng Xianzhi lowered his voice, "Lu Tingwan, have you been hoping for my death for a long time?"
"No, no," Lu Tingwan raised her hand and carefully took back the divorce papers. "I have to wait until you die before I can divorce you. Why is it so?"
"I feel like we're going to get divorced eventually, so it doesn't matter if you sign the agreement earlier. If someone kills you someday, what will I do then?"
Cheng Xianzhi laughed angrily.
"You seem quite disappointed that I didn't die."
"If I wait until you die, it won't be a divorce, I'll have to remarry!"
Cheng Xianzhi coughed heavily a few times and pushed himself up despite the pain. Lu Tingwan even went to help him. He glared at him, his chest aching with anger. "You're hoping for my death. Who do you want to marry again?"
"Is it Luo Yunchu who stepped on your status as a daughter of the Lu family and a wife of the Cheng family to enter the official career, or is it Xie Zhao who revolves around you every day?" He almost suppressed his anger, and at this moment the sourness in his heart covered up the pain.
Lu Tingwan, however, seemed unconcerned and sighed to herself, "It's hard to remarry, after all, I'm a remnant of the Lu family and your concubine..."
Cheng Xianzhi: “…”
For some reason, her word "concubine" stung Cheng Xianzhi. She used to be so carefree and free-spirited, but now this identity made her uncomfortable and self-doubting...
Cang Zhu's voice interrupted their conversation, and Lu Tingwan put away the divorce letter.
"Master, it's time to take the medicine." Cangzhu came in holding the medicine.
Lu Tingwan made way and was about to leave: "Then I'll go back."
When they reached the screen, Cheng Xianzhi shouted, "Stop!"
"Cang Shu, step back."
The two looked at each other, and Cang Shu tactfully passed the medicine in his hand to Lu Tingwan, "Thank you, Second Madam."
"Feed the medicine." Cheng Xianzhi withdrew his gaze and said lightly.
"Let Atractylodes feed you."
Cheng Xianzhi ignored her reluctance and said, "In three months, I will hold a fighting competition in the name of the Imperial Guards."
Lu Tingwan became interested and walked closer to ask, "What is a fighting competition?"
"There has always been a shortage of generals to guard the Northwest. Empress Dowager Jiang previously recommended Jiang Qingsheng to succeed Liu Qiyuan as the Northwest General. Later, Jiang Qingsheng was involved in an assassination case, so the matter has been put on hold for the time being. There are many people eyeing the position of Northwest General, and I have my candidate!"
Lu Tingwan took a few steps forward.
"If anyone can stand out and take first place in this fighting competition, I will recommend him to His Majesty as the Northwest General to guard the border."
"Xie Zhao wants to participate too." Cheng Xianzhi deliberately added another sentence, staring at the medicine bowl in her hand.
"Hmm?" Lu Tingwan raised his eyes. "You want Xie Zhao to guard the northwest?"
Cheng Xianzhi's eyes were filled with her reaction.
"The northwest is controlled by Dalan, and the aristocratic families are eyeing it covetously. The emperor wants a confidant to guard it, but Empress Dowager Jiang will not agree easily. Only Xie Zhao has no power behind him. The emperor is willing to use him, and the Jiang party will not stop him. He is naturally the best candidate." Lu Tingwan analyzed the pros and cons, and his eyebrows gradually curved.
What Xie Zhao has always wanted to do is to achieve great things on the battlefield, and she should be happy for him.
"The medicine is getting cold." Cheng Xianzhi reminded.
Lu Tingwan reacted and reached over, but Cheng Xianzhi didn't take it. He paused for a moment, "Even if you're heartless to me, I'm still your husband in name only. Is it difficult for you to feed me medicine by the bed?"
She then sat down on the edge of the couch, scooped some food from her spoon and put it into her mouth. "Who are the participants in this fighting competition?"
"There are captains from various camps of the Imperial Guard, sons of noble families, and battle-hardened generals from all walks of life."
"If Xie Zhao wants to stand out, he has to show his true abilities."
Lu Tingwan sighed slightly, and Cheng Xianzhi asked, "What's wrong?"
"Hmm?" She was a little absent-minded. When the medicine bowl was empty, she realized, "Why are you telling me this?"
"Shouldn't you be happy to let Xie Zhao go to the northwest?" Cheng Xianzhi saw the confusion in her eyes. "You don't want to stay in the mansion. Do you hate me? Or are you anxious to return to the palace and see the person you want to see?"
Lu Tingwan was even more confused. "What do you mean by that? Are you using Xie Zhao to talk to me so that I can stay in the mansion and continue to look after you?"
She even found it ridiculous.
"Why do you think that the condition of Xie Zhao taking charge of the northwest will allow me to stay in the mansion? Cheng Xianzhi, you are a strange person."
Cheng Xianzhi fell into self-doubt, "Isn't it?"
"What makes you think so?"
Then he said calmly, "In that case, you don't have to return to the palace for the time being."
"I have submitted a letter to return to the palace. The Queen Mother has approved it. I will be back tomorrow." Lu Tingwan put down the medicine bowl and prepared to leave.
"I have already sent a letter to the palace. The mistress of the Shangshu Mansion is pregnant, and the master is seriously injured and bedridden. Palace Manager Lu is needed to take care of the housework. The emperor has issued an oral order. Palace Manager Lu does not need to rush back to the palace to serve the empress dowager. I will send you back after I recover from my injuries." He said it lightly.
"What?" Lu Tingwan was surprised and stood up to ask, "Who told you to make the decision for me on your own?"
"Aren't we all serving others? If you serve the Queen Mother, she can't promise you anything. But if you serve me, I can promise you something!"
"Divorce papers?" Her eyes lit up.
Cheng Xian saw her change of mood and felt unhappy. "Help Xie Zhao fulfill his ambition."
Lu Tingwan sneered, "You don't need to promise, I believe him."
She stepped out of the study and shouted into the courtyard, "Cang Shu, take good care of your master."
Cheng Xianzhi looked at Qingsu's back, a smile appeared on the corner of his mouth, and he was not in a hurry to stop her.
Lu Tingwan was bathing in the moonlight on the way from the study to Yanshengtang. The moonlight shone on Qiuju. She was kicking stones and still thinking about what Cheng Xianzhi had said.
When Cang Zhu came, he said that his injuries had worsened, but tonight he didn't look like that. Suddenly, she seemed to understand something: Cheng Xianzhi did it on purpose.
I saw a figure quickly change direction and return to the study.
Cheng Xianzhi leaned lazily against the head of the bed, seemingly waiting confidently for someone to come back.
In a blink of an eye, the light outside the door was blocked, and Lu Tingwan's figure entered the screen, his steps slightly hurried.
"Cheng Xianzhi, you asked me to come here tonight just to tell me this?"
"What else?"
"Your injury is fake."
Cheng Xianzhi said calmly, "You only now remember to care about my injury."
Cheng Xianzhi said nothing. When Lu Tingwan wanted to leave, he grabbed her wrist and pulled her forward despite the pain. Lu Tingwan lost her balance and fell in front of him. One of her hands was held by him, and the other hand was supported at her side. His breath was warm, so close to her.
Cheng Xianzhi's eyes were filled with longing, and he wanted to see something from her face. Lu Tingwan's heart was beating fast, and her face was burning. She had a clear outline, and her fair complexion was slightly red. Her sickly look dispelled some of the coldness of the past. This way, it made people want to get closer to her.
Seeing that little face flushed red because of him, Cheng Xianzhi couldn't bear the emotion in his heart and let go of her hand. Lu Tingwan was still staring at that face.
"Have you seen enough?" Cheng Xianzhi turned his face away and coughed lightly, as if trying to hide something.
Lu Tingwan moved away, rubbed his wrist, and said resentfully: "You pulled me."
"Do you think I'm happy?"
He just wanted to keep the person, but he didn't know how to start, and he felt very uncomfortable.
"There's no one on duty in the study, so you can do it."
"Keep watch?" Lu Tingwan stared at him suspiciously, "Isn't Cang Shu here?"
"I asked him to go to Han Zhou." The heat in his body was slowly subsiding.
Lu Tingwan just remembered this, "By the way, did you find any trace of Han Zhou?"
"without."
"oh."
Lu Tingwan looked around, looking for something.
"What are you looking for?"
"See where I can sleep," she said seriously.
Cheng Xianzhi propped himself up with his arms, a faint smile on his lips, and slowly lay down.
He closed his eyes and whispered, "You can sleep on that couch."
The couch was facing Cheng Xianzhi's low couch. He would usually lean on the couch with his elbows to read or think about things. The scent of sandalwood from his body seemed to still linger on the couch.
She lay on the couch, staring at the beams. The moonlight streamed in, casting a ray of light in the corner of her eyes. The branches outside the window cast mottled shadows, falling on her outline. It was quiet outside the house, with only the occasional chirping of birds. Her thoughts were in a mess, and she sighed softly.
The person with closed eyes in front of the low couch noticed, "What are you thinking about?"
She glanced out the window, thinking back to the days in Jiangling, running through a sea of flowers, the salty sea breeze blowing against her face. In the evenings, her mother would stand on the steps of the thatched cottage, calling her home for dinner.
"My home."
The Lu family has been searched, and Cheng Xianzhi has never accompanied her back to her parents' home. Although this marriage is based on interests and calculations, she is just an innocent person involved, and he still owes her.
"You want to go back to the Lu family?"
"It's not the Lu family, it's my and my mother's home, Jiangling." Her voice was as thin as a thread. She was not on guard against him at the moment, but just treated him as someone to confide in.
"Jiang Ling?" Cheng Xianzhi opened his eyes and turned his head to look at the hazy figure lying on the couch. In the moonlight, he could only see the blurry profile.
The home she wanted to return to has always been there. He didn't know what was so good about Jiangling that Lu Tingwan was willing to give up everything to go back there.
"What's so good about that place?" A strand of hair blew into his eyes. Lu Tingwan turned sideways and met Cheng Xianzhi's gaze.
"You naturally don't understand. For someone like you who has risen to power, power is the only weapon for survival. I know that we all have different standpoints. Everyone has their own path to take. No one should change for anyone else, stay for anyone, or leave for anyone else."
"So, you initially used Xie Zhao's future in exchange for my return to Kyoto. It wasn't because I wanted to change for Xie Zhao, but because I knew that even if I didn't agree, you would still have your way to make me come back."
Cheng Xianzhi stared at her without saying a word.
"So, this time, your threat to stop me from returning to the palace by using Xie Zhao's participation in the fighting competition is in vain."
"Threat?" Cheng Xianzhi gave a wry smile. "So you're leaving tomorrow?"
Lu Tingwan turned aside again, not looking at him again, nor answering, quietly admiring the night view outside the window. The person on the low couch behind her raised his hand and touched the light on the side of her face through the air, as if holding her face with caress through the light and shadow.
After a while, a slight breathing sound came from the couch, and Cheng Xianzhi's gaze moved to the window.
The next morning, Cheng Xianzhi had just woken up when Lu Tingwan came in holding a basin.
He had difficulty moving and was trying to stand up, so Lu Tingwan quickly put down the wooden basin to help him.
"The imperial physician said that although the wound on your body is not deep, it has damaged your tendons and veins. You need to rest and rest. Don't do such heavy movements in the future."
Cheng Xianzhi looked at her in disbelief. Has she changed her personality?
Then she wrung out the wet handkerchief and handed it to his face. Cheng Xianzhi was about to raise his hand to take it, but Lu Tingwan walked around him and wiped his face directly, causing Cheng Xianzhi to pause.
He seemed to see through my indifference and asked, "Tell me, what do you want?"
She smiled and said, "I want to see the Sunset Bow, is that okay?"
Cheng Xianzhi sneered. He knew it was just a show of kindness for no reason.
"Have Cangshu sent it over later."
"Don't bother, I can go to the equipment storehouse and take a look myself."
Cheng Xianzhi glanced at it and thought it was not a troublesome matter.
"You can just send it over." She then changed her mind.
The sun was shining brightly outside. Cheng Xianzhi's gaze fell on the window. As the morning light streamed in, Lu Tingwan seemed to notice something and said considerately, "The imperial physician said not to move too much. But he also said that moving around a bit is good for recovery, especially for those bedridden. They need to breathe more to avoid suffocating themselves."
Lu Tingwan supported Cheng Xianzhi as they walked outside the study. Late autumn was almost over and the sweet-scented osmanthus flowers in the courtyard were about to fall. He could walk normally, but if he moved too fast, it would easily tear his wound.
"I haven't seen the sun for a long time." The warm sun fell on Cheng Xianzhi's outline. Lu Tingwan glanced at him sideways. He was usually cold and untouchable, but today he was much gentler.
Lu Tingwan sat on the stone bench, supporting himself with his arms on both sides and swinging his legs. "It's good to walk around more."
There was silence for a long time. In the past, when they met, they always had something to talk about. Now they were together so comfortably and without anything to do, and for a moment they didn't know what to say.
Cheng Xianzhi always carried her on his back. She was bored, having to take care of such a dull person. She could only mutter to herself, "When will Cang Shu come back?"
Seeing that she couldn't stay any longer, Cheng Xianzhi said, "If you feel bored, you can bring those machines you made earlier to the study."
Those machines had not been touched since the Lu family was executed, except for the Sunset Bow.
"I'll get it!" Lu Tingwan stood up after hearing that, then stopped and said, "How about I help you in first?"
Cheng Xianzhi raised his hand without saying anything. Lu Tingwan paused for a moment and left the study.
When she came back, Cang Shu had already brought the Sunset Bow.
The majestic bow was unfolded and stood in the courtyard. When Lu Tingwan came in and saw the bow and arrow again, he couldn't help but sigh, his eyes widened.
She quickly put down the phone in her hand and observed it. "I was in a hurry that day and didn't have time to take a closer look."
Cangshu came over again with the medicine bowl, and Cheng Xianzhi asked him to put the medicine down and sent him away.
He reached out to grab the medicine bowl. Lu Tingwan caught a glimpse of his movements and took the initiative to move over and pick up the medicine bowl. "Can I try this bow?"
"This originally belonged to you, but you can't pull it open with your strength."
He took a mouthful of medicine and frowned. It tasted bitter.
Unable to pull, she could only watch. She felt itchy inside, and a look of loneliness flashed across her face. Cheng Xianzhi caught it and said, "When my injury is healed, I will pull it for you to see."
"That's fine." She forced a smile and continued feeding the medicine.
There were footsteps outside the study. The two thought it was Cang Zhu coming back to report an important matter. When he came in, Luzhu was supporting Gongsun Xue. Her belly was bigger and her steps were slower.
"The master and the second lady had a very pleasant conversation. Xue'er heard it all outside the courtyard. But is there anything interesting that you can tell her about?" Gongsun Xue'er's gentle voice broke in.
The medicine spoon that Lu Tingwan handed over stopped in front of Cheng Xianzhi. Cheng Xianzhi just glanced at it and then withdrew his gaze. He held her wrist as if no one was around and put the medicine on the spoon into his mouth. This action was like that of a loving couple.
Lu Tingwan stood up and saluted without noticing anything, "The eldest lady is here."
But all of this fell into Gongsun Xue's eyes. She felt very upset, but she had to put on a smile.
"Is my lord's injury better?" Gongsun Xue walked towards him.
"Yeah." Cheng Xianzhi nodded, then turned to Lu Tingwan who was standing on the other side, "I haven't finished my medicine yet."
Lu Tingwan realized it later, and Gongsun Xue took the initiative to extend her hand, "Second Madam is guarding the bed day and night, why don't you let Xue'er come and help the master with the medicine."
She was a little embarrassed. The medicine bowl in her palm felt like a hot potato. Just as she was about to pass it over, Cheng Xianzhi's cold gaze interrupted her, "No need. You are not in good health. She can serve the Queen Mother with ease, so taking care of me is no problem."
"Your health and the baby are the most important. Just focus on taking care of the baby and giving birth to the child, and don't worry about anything else."
Gongsun Xue lowered her eyes in depression. His words were clearly aimed at her. Cheng Xianzhi had said that he would divorce her after she gave birth to a child and send her back to the Minister of the Central Secretariat's residence. How would others view her now?
After giving birth to a child, he was not valued by her husband's family and had to be sent back to her parents' home. This was a naked humiliation, and it was inevitable that people would speculate about the origin of the child in her womb.
"Master, Xue'er hasn't seen you for a long time, and I miss you so much..." She showed that pitiful look again.
"What are you still standing there for? The medicine has gone cold."
Lu Tingwan took particularly heavy steps as she walked around Gongsun Xue. She wished there was a hole in the ground at this moment. If she didn't know that the father of the child in Gongsun Xue's belly was someone else, she wouldn't feel so awkward.
After feeding her the medicine spoonful by spoonful, Gongsun Xue showed no intention of leaving. She looked around the courtyard and noticed the Sunset Bow standing not far away.
"This bow and arrow is so powerful. Such weapons are not common in Dalan. Is this the master's bow?"
Lu Tingwan wanted to explain, but Cheng Xianzhi was the first to respond, "Yeah."
The courtyard was quiet for a while. Gongsun Xue began to feel a little uncomfortable and tried to find something to talk about.
"Winter arrived early in Kyoto this year, so it's important for the master to recover from his injuries. Xue'er has sent someone to bring you some winter clothes. I'm afraid the measurements I took previously were off. Why don't I take another measurement today to make sure the new clothes don't fit you? If the Second Madam stays at the mansion for a long time this winter, Xue'er will have the housekeeper buy more winter supplies and charcoal."
"The eldest lady is pregnant and has to take care of the housework. It's really hard." Lu Tingwan felt that Gongsun Xue was too strong inside. She was pregnant with someone else's blood, but she still asked Cheng Xianzhi to keep her. She even dared to walk around in front of him with a pitiful attitude.
If it wasn't for wanting him to change his mind, it was because the two families still had endless interests to gain, which Cheng Xianzhi couldn't give up at the moment.
However, in his eyes, there was no longer any trace of the kindness he once showed to Gongsun Xue. Or rather, Cheng Xianzhi didn't want to pretend anymore.
"Don't bother, Lu Tingwan can measure the size."
"I?"
Cheng Xianzhi glanced up at her, and Lu Tingwan quickly changed her tone and said, "Of course it's no problem. I'm the one who coordinates the new clothes for the ladies in the palace and the empress dowager with the clothing bureau. As for the master, the first lady doesn't need to worry about it. Taking care of the baby is the most important thing."
Gongsun Xue's face was grim, but she still had to pretend to be dignified, "Then I'll have to trouble the Second Madam."
"I'm tired. I'll take your wife back to Yingyue Pavilion. If she's not feeling well, she can just take care of herself. If you need anything, ask the housekeeper to help."
"I am injured at home, and most of the affairs of the court will be taken care of by you, sir. If you feel bored, you can go back and visit me."
"Help me in and rest."
Cheng Xian ordered Gongsun Xue to leave, and seeing that she was getting nothing in return, she had no choice but to leave.
"Why did you say just now that the Sunset Bow was yours?" Lu Tingwan held his arm.
Cheng Xianzhi naturally raised his arm and passed it over her head, resting it on her shoulder for support, almost like they were arm in arm. He leaned in quietly and whispered in her ear, "With your status, you possess such a powerful weapon. What do you think others will think?"
Lu Tingwan was still in shock. He was on guard against Gongsun Xue in the same way. His breath was stuck in his mouth, and he was speechless.
"Thank you...thank you." She looked up at him, frightened by his approaching distance.
"Thank you for what?"
"Anyway, thank you." Lu Tingwan frowned and turned away.
Cheng Xianzhi lay back on the couch. Lu Tingwan covered him with the quilt. The person on the couch said gently, "Don't think too much. Stay in the mansion. When I recover from my injuries, I will take you back to the palace."
"Yeah." Lu Tingwan nodded. After Cheng Xianzhi rested, she observed the bow in the yard for a long time.
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