Possession
At the end of June, the air became moist with each breeze.
The clouds in the sky are clearly divided into light gray, medium gray, and dark gray.
The library's window frame cut out a glimpse of dusk. Bai Luo sat quietly at his desk, concentrating on reviewing his professional knowledge.
Two girls were whispering beside me.
"I heard that this man has been lingering across from the gate of Hangzhou University for several days."
"It's so scary. Look at the scar on his face. It's so creepy."
"You said he wouldn't be a bad guy, right?"
Bai Luo's fingers paused as he turned the pages of the book.
I glanced sideways intentionally, and on the cold white laptop screen, a hideous face suddenly appeared in my eyes.
"boom!"
The heart was beating wildly in the chest, but it couldn't pump blood, and the limbs were as cold as if they were immersed in ice water.
Even after ten years, she still remembered what he looked like when he was fifteen.
Ten years have passed, and the man's face has shown signs of vicissitudes, but his facial features are still as three-dimensional as before.
So vivid, so real.
It’s... Chang Liu.
He came to see her.
After a moment's rest, she unlocked her phone and registered on a campus forum she had never logged into.
A bold and black warning title hangs in sight.
——Please be careful when leaving the school.
There are not only pictures but also a video of more than ten seconds below.
The alleys outside the school gate are crisscrossed, and an old, dim lamp hangs on the peeling wall.
Gray streaks of light penetrated the seasonal noisy rain and fell on the cheap cigarettes between the fingers of the embarrassed man.
The comment section is like a five-horse torn apart body, with everyone holding their own opinions.
[Fuck, the scar on his face is so scary.]
[I've seen him several times every day after school.]
[Don’t you think he’s quite handsome when you look closely?]
[Sisters support you. Who knows the value of him wearing a baseball cap?]
[No, you still care about the looks upstairs. If I follow you in the middle of the night, you're done.]
[It's obvious he's not a good person, just some scoundrel in society.]
[Why do I feel like he's looking for someone? Every time I see him, he's staring at the school gate.]
[Oh no! They're probably targeting a student from our school.]
[Could it be BL?!]
[No way, it’s none of her business.]
[In short, please be careful and don't leave the school alone.]
Each comment pricked her nerves inch by inch.
He is not a bad person.
No, no.
As the sun sets, the clouds swallow up the last of the warm colors, leaving only an iron-gray sky.
Outside the window, the wind blows the green leaves, making them rustle in the air.
Bai Luo closed his eyes, and his vision became dim.
The sound of the wind pierces my ears, wrinkling my memories, as if it were a lifetime ago.
＿＿
The awkward June of 2008 and the damp June of 2018.
A moment of overlap.
The calendar pages are peeled back one by one.
Stripped back to the darkest basement, the endless night filled with blood.
Outside the rusty iron gate, fifteen-year-old Chang Liu handed her a piece of bread with trembling hands, which was not enough for him to eat.
But he pulled the corners of his lips like an older brother.
"Eat quickly."
"I won't let you go hungry."
There were hurried footsteps in the darkness.
Chang Liu was obviously panicked, but he did not forget to comfort her.
"I'll get you out."
"Do you believe me?"
＿＿
Ten years later, in the distortedly beautiful blues moment of Hangzhou and Hong Kong, the evil darkness of the basement could not penetrate the Eastern Kingdom.
She heard her own choked response.
believe.
But he really did send her from hell to dawn.
And he fell into the black abyss again.
Sixth brother.
Why do you have so many more scars on your face?
Why do you have a short haircut? Don’t you like long hair the best?
He gave her some bread to eat, applied medicine on her, took the blame for her, and told her that her brother would always protect her.
And it was she who threw him into hell.
The blurry images are like frames of old neon movies playing in my mind.
She failed to catch her big brother.
"Why is she crying?"
The two girls packed their bags and left, accidentally catching a glimpse of Bai Luo crying silently.
The whole person seemed to sink into an opaque cold sea, breathing became difficult, vision became blurred, and the whole body trembled.
At eight o'clock in the evening, the library was filled with people reviewing for their final exams.
In his weary vision, he saw the most notorious campus beauty of Hangzhou University stumbling out of the library.
Dive headfirst into the summer night filled with the buzzing of cicadas.
The night wind blew her long ice-blue hair into the air.
It attracted the attention of many students along the way, and some curious people even held up their mobile phones to record videos.
There was a crowd of people at the school gate. The girl was running forward in a daze when the green light on the sidewalk turned red.
On the busy asphalt road, dozens of meters away, without any warning, I bumped into a pair of eyes that I hadn't seen for ten years.
My brain feels empty.
Rushing forward regardless of everything.
Can't catch the fifteen-year-old big brother.
Maybe we can catch the 25-year-old Chang Liu.
She doesn't want him to suffer.
Chang Liu, who was buying supper at a street vendor across the street, unexpectedly met a pair of talking eyes when he looked up.
I don't know why, but I was mentally prepared.
Finally fled in panic.
The main feature is speed and embarrassment.
At the school gate, Lu Fei and her group were about to go to the food stall, but saw Bai Luo running past in a panic.
Ignoring the traffic lights, he crossed the street, his figure lost in the hustle and bustle on the opposite side.
It seems that the person he is pursuing is the focus of heated discussion on the campus forum.
A scar on the right cheek, sharp hair, male.
"Does Luo Luo know that man?"
Concubine Lu frowned and asked Wu Kai, who had known Bai Luo the longest.
Wu Kai shook his head, indicating that he was not aware of it.
The boy, who was at the end of the group and attracted frequent stares from students at the school gate, puckered his cheek in annoyance.
The girl dared to enter the old alley alone.
Bai Luo ran so fast that he was dizzy, but still lost the person.
Why are you hiding from her?
In the gloomy century-old alley, the lonely shadow is dimmed by the moonlight.
Just like a child who has lost his way, he doesn't know which direction to go.
She couldn't find her older brother.
The sky was swaying in a gloomy manner. The eternal night was endless and had no end.
Gazing at the dawn through the vast night fog, clutching at despair, but unable to save a ray of light.
She couldn't bring back her eleven-year-old self.
The old alleys near the school and the old lanes in the old city are all equally dilapidated, shabby, and winding.
At the end of Nanfeng Lane is the rebellious Bo Xi.
She wanted to see what was at the end of the old alley.
I want to see what choice fate gives her.
Is it a sea of flowers or a high wall?
Is it a bright future, or a deeper darkness?
The mossy road under the night light is deep and dark, with mottled shadows of walls along the way.
The stumbling person counts his scattered steps as he rushes towards the end.
The sound of the wind in my ears was too fast, sometimes high-pitched, sometimes low.
In a trance, something dripped onto his cheek.
Moist. Cool. Tart. Bitter.
It's raining.
Black rain.
The weather forecast for Hangzhou Port lied again.
After a long time, Bai Luo heard the sound of heavy rain.
Suddenly I recalled a summer night in my childhood, when my grandmother was fanning herself with a palm-leaf fan and telling a story halfway through when the cicadas chirped, waking me up from my sleepless night in my memory.
Unfortunately, the rain had already fallen all over my body.
Suddenly I want to smoke.
The purest face, smoking the wildest cigarettes.
The lighter was a thin one and somehow got into his schoolbag.
It doesn't matter.
With a "click".
The flames rose slowly.
The cold smoke drags a wisp of light mist.
In the remaining warmth of the foggy world, darkness retreated a step.
She slowly raised her eyes.
The shadow in the foggy night blurred the tears but made the profile clearer.
The angular jaw gives the silhouette a three-dimensional and elegant look.
It can only be one person.
——Bo Qian.
The lights were so dim that the alley was dizzy.
Bai Luo bit the corner of his lips while smoking, and gave a sarcastic look.
Every time I reach a dark alley with no lights.
Why are you always behind me?
There were crowds of people, but when I turned around, I saw only him, like finding an oasis in the desert.
The sound of rain is ridiculous, each sound getting louder than the last.
The man leaning against the wall at the end of the alley stared at her wantonly. His eyes devoured her light like a shadow, leaving only darkness.
"Don't you recognize me?"
Against the light and shadow, the person walking on the noisy rain was approaching step by step.
Summer cicadas chirp in the treetops, fireworks spread across the sky, and there is a moment of sweet and bitter silence.
The rain blurred the outlines of everything, except the boy's eyes, which were as clear as an umbrella.
A bone umbrella that protects her all.
With wisps of smoke burning at the corners of his lips, Bai Luo remained motionless, drowning out the lonely sound of rain.
Bo Qi's cold and emotionless facial features were magnified again and again in the fog and rain.
"You come here alone, aren't you afraid of danger?"
His bony fingers naturally took the cigarette from her lips and held it proudly in his own mouth.
The wind messed up their cold wet hair, and drops of rain fell one by one.
Bai Luo raised his tear-stained little face, his eyes so red it made people feel distressed.
"Why are you here?"
Why are you everywhere?
Did he come after her because he saw her running out of the campus in a panic chasing someone and was worried that something might have happened to her?
"Who are you looking for here? The scarred man?"
Bo Xi never likes to beat around the bush and always comes straight to the point.
"Is he important to you?"
The sky was vast and boundless, and Bai Luo's eyes were cold.
"important."
"He's not called Scar Man. He has a name."
The voice was so cold that it made the questioner stunned for a moment.
Those who always have a sure win strategy always fail in front of her.
The rain keeps falling without end.
"Okay, I'll find it for you."
A low, hoarse laugh broke through the air, and a thin-framed person brushed past.
His back is so tall and straight that it can hold up the sky.
In seconds, a warmth covered the slippery wrist.
Someone wouldn't let him go.
Bitter summer is not a good season.
Everything withers, flowers droop, and green leaves turn yellow.
People are easily separated.
The underlying tone is sad.
"Bo Qian."
The corners of his scarlet eyes drooped, and he said three words with a cruel heart.
"That's not necessary."
There's no need to be so nice to her.
There's no need to put away all your edges in front of her.
She wanted him to be a boy who never gave up.
Don't bow to anyone.
The rain fell too heavily in this painful city, so it's no wonder they scattered under the umbrellas.
*
This was the first time the two parted on bad terms.
Bai Luo originally wanted to stay in the rental house tonight, but he had a review tomorrow and needed to use the computer to look up professional materials.
Had to turn back.
A man covered in rain and mist got on the last night bus in a daze.
The retro bus sped along the deserted road, and the stuffy and damp air seeped into the lights of thousands of homes outside the window.
Noise-cancelling headphones are placed against the ear bones, and the lyrics play slowly.
“Our wandering has just reached this point.”
"Before we reach the end of the world"
"Free card!"
In the stuffy carriage, a mechanical female voice slowly echoed.
On rainy days, the water vapor is green and rushes in recklessly.
Bai Luo, who was huddled in the last row and immersed in the singing, suddenly felt the coolness on his side being melted away by his burning body temperature.
Thinking it was a passenger in a hurry to get home, he quietly moved inward.
The car window was covered with a thin layer of mist, and slender white fingers wrote two words one by one in boredom.
"Thin"
She naturally noticed that Bo Yi treated her differently than before.
There is no kindness without reason in the world, and no one will be nice to you for no reason.
Behind any good intention, there are specific needs and purposes.
Do you like him?
She doesn't know.
Or you can't tell the difference between love and gratitude.
In short, he is important.
No blood relationship, no old friends.
He is more important than my uncle and Chang Liu.
The mist on the car window blurred the words and the dim lights, just like her blurry future.
The car doors opened and closed, and people poured in, with a few scattered people dispersing in disorder.
In the dark corner of the last row, people by the window are looking at the scenery, and people beside her are looking at her.
The trees along the road were wet and drooping, and the fallen leaves all over the city were darkened by the rain.
Bai Luo seemed to be aware that someone was staring at him, and he turned his eyes slightly to the side.
Caught off guard, my sight fell into a pair of dangerous and sharp eyes.
In an instant, the sky was leaking like a torrential rain.
The sound of rain is loud and the sound of wind is melodious.
The rain in Hangzhou and Hong Kong tonight reunites with the water from all over the world.
He was her inevitable one.
It happened that the traffic light at the intersection was playing tricks and turned from green to red.
The long 60-second countdown begins.
Bai Luo's unfocused pupils felt sore.
There was a sob in his throat and he wanted to speak, but in the end he only chose a name.
A long-lost name.
"Sixth Brother."
There is no long time no see, no how are you.
She just called him her big brother purely and sincerely.
The song in the headphones still plays on loop.
"Falling Flowers"
"We'll Meet Again"
"Calling your name softly"
Countdown 30 seconds.
There were ruts all over the asphalt road, and Chang Liu's voice was broken in the wind.
"Our little Zhaozhao has grown into a big girl."
"Why are you still so thin?"
Ten years is a long migration.
Too many people and too many things have changed.
But nothing has changed between the two.
It does not fade with time.
On the fogged glass window, Bai Luo's hazy figure was reflected, his cold pale little face, and his beautiful eyes were shedding tears.
"How have you been these years?"
Is life bad? Is it very hard?
Countdown 15 seconds.
In the humid wetlands, an indelible sadness overflows.
"fine."
One sentence is good enough to describe the past, which has been calm and peaceful for ten years.
"It's quite normal."
With just one ordinary sentence, he wiped out all the scars that had been engraved in his memory over the past ten years.
Understatement replaces all the ups and downs you have experienced.
Not a word about the bone-gnawing pain.
Chang Liu turned his face away, his Adam's apple rolling as if he was swallowing bitterness.
The moonlight stretched the shadows of the two people very long, long enough to cover the scattered footprints over the past ten years.
Countdown 5 seconds.
"Sixth Brother."
"sorry."
An apology came too late, too many years.
They both had their own difficulties back then, so they couldn't blame each other.
Countdown 1 second.
The red light jumped into green.
Vehicles from all directions converged and then separated.
Life is like a traffic light, turning, stopping, walking, etc.
The bus made a sharp turn and happened to see a bus stop ahead, and parked steadily on the wet asphalt road.
The raindrops fell heavily between the trees on the roadside.
Bai Luo stared blankly at Chang Liu's departing back.
He has a thin frame and bony shoulders.
sorry.
I'm really sorry.
She was only eleven years old at that time.
Staying alive is the only hope.
There were two girls in high school uniforms in front of me, with their fluffy high ponytails swinging back and forth.
Youth is bright.
The phone in my hand was playing popular songs, slamming repeatedly.
“Unfortunately, there are no ifs.”
“Only the results remain”
The two girls laughed loudly and discussed school gossip noisily.
Suddenly, I heard a light cell phone ringing tone.
I don’t know why the beautiful sister in the back row didn’t answer the phone, she just kept burying her arms in her arms.
The two girls looked at each other and kindly reminded each other.
"Sister, your phone is ringing."
Bai Luo raised his face in a daze and put the phone to his ear in a daze.
The bangs of hair cover the drooping eyes.
"I'm not home tonight. Do you have the key?"
There seemed to be a female voice on the other end, the voice was thin and light.
"I got it."
Bai Luo sniffed and spoke softly.
The phone screen returned to a cold white.
The two girls in the front row secretly glanced at the sad rainy night in the back row.
She was clearly a clear and sweet sister, but for some reason her tears were rolling down her cheeks like crazy.
The smell of rain was damp. The bus came to an abrupt stop at the next stop.
The girl with a high ponytail who got off the car from the back door turned back in a hurry and stuffed a marshmallow into Bai Luo's hand.
"Sister, please have some candy."
"Don't be sad, you'll make yourself look ugly when you cry."
Sister, be happy.
Tears are a silent, sour downpour.
"Thanks."
It took a long, long time, so long that she was the only one left on the bus, before she finally found her voice.
Thank you for the kindness of strangers.
Thank you for the warmth of the world.
The rain stopped and the crescent moon shone through the gaps in the mist.
Bai Luo walked alone in Nanfeng Alley, and damp memories seeped into the cracks of the bluestone slabs.
Is there still a young man leaning against the shadow of a street lamp tonight, holding a half-empty can of Coke or a cigarette between his delicate fingers?
Is there anyone who will wait for her to return to her rental house no matter how late it is?
Before I knew it, the outline of the Millennium Residential Building came into view.
The moist eyes fell into the dim iron gate and lost focus.
Bo Xi leaned comfortably against the open-air stairs, with the endless fireworks of thousands of homes behind him.
He didn't know what the large group of people in front of him said, but he sneered, a cigarette dangling lazily from the corner of his lips.
Occasionally, a passerby would glance at him hurriedly, but he was completely unaware and just let the smell of smoke fill his lungs. He choked and coughed very lightly, which was immediately suppressed by an indifferent expression.
"Should I call you Big Sister or Second Sister?"
Half-brother, half-sister.
No one told him that he was the product of his parents' coercion.
Brothers and sisters are the crystallization of their parents and the people they love.
No one told him who was older, his brother or his sister.
"I am younger than him. He is the eldest brother and I am the second sister."
"I came to see you today on behalf of my mother."
The night wind blew the woman wet, and her crimson lips moved.
"I've had someone buy a high-end apartment near your school. Stop living in a rental. How can you afford to live in a place like this with your status? It's too cheap."
Since when did high-end apartments symbolize successful people, and rental houses were labeled as "low-class"?
Compressing the multidimensional existence of human beings into a single economic scale.
Bo Xi laughed sarcastically as if he had heard a huge joke.
"What is my identity?"
"illegitimate child?"
Perhaps in his parents' respective families, his existence is no different from that of an illegitimate child.
The elder sister and elder brother both had loving parents. Suddenly one day, they were told that they had a younger brother who was six or seven years younger than them.
In their perception, Bo Xi was undoubtedly his parents' extramarital child, a complete illegitimate child.
Car lights flashed in the distance, and the light and shadow flowed over him, but never actually touched him.
The cigarette butt will eventually burn out, and he just lets it go without caring, letting the ashes and sparks fall into the shadows.
The night swallowed up the last bit of light and also swallowed up the subtle sneer at the corner of his mouth.
It seems like a mockery of the world, and also like a mockery of one's own powerlessness.
"Go back and don't come here again."
"I don't need your pity."
He did not touch a penny of the property left by his grandfather, and he refused all the compensation offered by his parents.
The sports car and motorcycle were gifts from his grandfather for his seventeenth and eighteenth birthdays respectively.
Grandpa is the only one who loves him, so he will take good care of them.
The bar was founded by him using the scholarship he received in high school, and all daily expenses come from the bar's profits.
What's wrong with renting a house cheaply?
At least it was money he earned himself.
The grass in the corner grows green in the summer.
Bai Luo walked slowly towards the open-air stairs in the rain.
It was hard to pretend not to hear their conversation.
However, I have no right or qualifications to interfere in other people's family affairs.
The man who looked as if he didn't care looked at his sister who was doing it for his own good with a cold look.
"Go back and tell her that some things cannot be found by retracing your steps."
I don't want him anymore, so there's no point in picking him up.
He is not a three-year-old child.
Life is one giant hindsight.
When your heart is cold, no matter how hard you try to hold it, only a corner of the ice will melt, and it will eventually be as cold as before.
The pain that I felt belatedly was like a thorn stuck in my throat. I couldn't swallow it, and when I spit it out, it bleeded.
After the rain, the cobblestones were half wet, half dry, and the moss was even greener. Bai Luo lowered his eyelashes, holding onto the damp handrail, and took one step at a time.
The night wind brings the lush green of wild plants in the courtyard, a wet green.
She couldn't help but look down at him. In the darkness, the young man with bloodshot eyes tilted his head up, and his gaze met her cold eyes squarely.
They looked at each other from a distance, staring at each other with no end in sight.
The endless summer with the chirping of cicadas is obscure and restrained.
Bai Luo blinked, and in an instant, she saw a tear dripping from the corner of the eye of the unruly man.
For a young man who has been rebellious all his life, crying is also a mockery of fate.
Tears flow backwards, smiles move forwards.
I have lost games and broken bones, but I never give up.
While Bai Luo was stunned, Bo Xi had already gone into the long night of Nanfeng Lane.
The night around him wrapped him tightly, as if he himself was part of the darkness.
It made her lose her mind.
It was the first time she actually saw him cry.
People who have no one to rely on have no one to vent their grievances and can only bear it silently alone.
In my early twenties, I shouldered all the difficulties alone.
The broken light bulb on the ceiling flickered sparsely. Bai Luo pursed his lips, and Chang Liu's last two words on the bus flashed through his mind.
"If I can find you, it means they can find you too."
"Hangzhou Port is no longer safe. Come with me and leave."
yes.
If Chang Liu can find her, they will definitely be able to find her.
Fleeing to the end of time, the past sticks to you like a shadow.
My eyelids are covered with the gloom of tonight's dusk.
She couldn't implicate him.
I climbed up to the fourth floor in a daze. My fingers holding the stairs were covered with dust and moisture, and my palms were stained with darkness.
Pushing open the dilapidated door, the rental house was covered with a layer of darkness.
Water vapor soaks everything.
The lights were dim, and shadows flickered on the wall.
I took a quick shower, changed into pajamas, and walked absentmindedly to the open-air balcony.
There was a swaying shadow in the French window behind me.
Bai Luo looked around, not knowing where Bo Yi had gone. Although he had told her on the phone that he would not be staying overnight in the rental house, she was still worried because he had been in such a low mood just now.
I unlocked my phone and couldn't help but send a message.
Delete and reduce over and over again.
[How are you? ]
Definitely not good.
What a stupid question.
While he wasn't looking, I quickly clicked "Retract".
I don’t know if Bo Xi saw it, but I sent a [?]
While thinking about Zhou, he caught a glimpse of a listless figure under the dim street light at the entrance of the alley.
The moss at the base of the wall rubbed against his trouser legs, and the damp coolness seeped into his skin, but he seemed unaware of it. His depressed body confronted the night, and in the smoke, he buried some inexplicable emotions.
There was no road at the end of Nanfeng Lane, only mud where he repeatedly fell and got up.
The raindrops fell rapidly again.
Bai Luo hurriedly put away his phone, grabbed an umbrella from the entrance, and hurried down the stairs in two steps.
Everything in the old city is stained with a decadent tone. The gray walls occasionally peel off, and the cigarette ashes from the people upstairs always roll down to the balcony which is less than one square meter.
Everything is desolate.
Walking through the wet night, I arrived at the only street lamp that was still lingering, like a ray of light in the endless darkness.
The figure has disappeared.
disappeared.
Are you leaving?
He hurriedly unlocked his phone and dialed the number.
No one answered.
When I hit it for the second time, the aroma of mint cigarettes and body temperature filled the air behind me.
"Why are you calling me?"
Asking despite knowing the answer.
Bai Luo was a beat slow, and her peripheral vision caught sight of the person who buried his chin in the crook of her neck.
Soft silver-gray hair.
Numb, tingling and itchy.
"Can't you sleep at night without me?"
A questioning tone, with a low ending sound.
The fog and rain attacked from all directions, swirling wildly into the shadow under the umbrella.
The corners of their clothes were wet.
Whether it was intentional or not, Bo Xi pressed her shoulders so heavily that Bai Luo suddenly felt sore.
The words came out according to his thoughts.
"Bo Yi, you are so heavy."
A complaining tone, with a coquettish ending.
Bo Xi was stunned for a moment, then slowly raised his chin.
"How about you press me?"
In the overwhelming darkness, he laughed wildly and all the gloom of the night disappeared in an instant.
“…”
"Stop laughing."
"Go home and sleep."
His shoulders felt lighter, and Bai Luo immediately put the umbrella handle into his hand. Seeing that he was grinning non-stop, he naturally raised his hand to cover his lips.
Another hand pulled his arm, urging him to go home quickly.
"Leave."
"Sew your mouth shut if you laugh again."
The man holding the black umbrella obediently let her palm cover his lips, holding his wrist, and leading him home step by step in the heavy rain.
A lamp in a residential building warms a window, and thousands of lights warm a city.
Love turns the night into dawn.
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