Sleepless Nights in Paris
She didn't wait for an answer, she wanted him to kneel down and confess.
What fate is arranged? It’s all his plan.
She was the prey, the prey that had been targeted long ago.
The bone umbrella was stuffed into Bo Xi's palm at some point. With a flick of his wrist, the umbrella swept towards the fleeing Bai Luo and pulled him back into his arms.
He glanced at her casually, and two words fell from his thin lips, passing them by lightly.
“Just passing by.”
Eighteen-year-old Bai Luo passed by, and even though he was getting wet in the rain, he was still stubbornly giving others a piece of clear sky.
The eighteen-year-old Bai Luo who passed by was willing to become the target of rumors just to protect the fragile dignity of a well-behaved student.
Ridiculous. Pathetic. And even more infuriating.
Does she think she is the savior?
Little do they know that the kindness they extend becomes cheap mercy in the eyes of others.
And what annoyed him the most was her stupid and heart-burning look.
When someone was foolish enough to hold an umbrella for someone in the rain, he would stare at the alley entrance and make his fists crack. When someone was carrying dirty water for someone, he would crush his cigarette butts into pieces in the corner.
The girl's clumsy shelter and trembling back fester into bloody sores in front of his eyes, bleeding silently, but no one can heal them.
So, he became crazy.
It's not madness, it's sane madness.
He was so crazy that he wanted to pull out all the thorns on her body and lock her into a world where only he was.
He alone can see it, he alone can touch it.
The rotten world wasn't worthy of chewing on her kindness. Her softness, her foolishness, could only feed him and him alone. Others weren't worthy.
She is not a saint, nor is she anyone's salvation.
She was his, his private property.
otherwise.
He would even burn down this filthy world.
Bai Luo would never know that the baby-faced girl would only think that she was meddling in other people's business and disdain her kindness.
The weak are the most afraid of the light.
The more you live in a cowardly state, the more you cannot bear to see others stand up straight and shine.
Her tenacity is like a magic mirror.
The inferiority, cowardice and the fear of speaking out of baby-faced girls are fully exposed.
So she hated, but what she hated was not the person, but the light that she could not reach even if she knelt.
Much of the hatred in the world is the externalization of inner struggles, a kind of sensitivity and inferiority that distorts the mind's vision.
Bai Luo looked him in the eye with a half-doubt. His mind raced, and he frowned in question.
"The top student in the grade likes to eavesdrop on other people's conversations?"
“…”
Bo Yi's heavy gaze lingered on her, and the girl's thoughts were always outside the Milky Way.
Bai Luo hooked his arms around his neck, stood on tiptoe, and pecked his jaw.
With bright eyes, he proudly talked about old grudges.
"If it hadn't been for the heavy rain that night causing the power outage, I would have delivered it to you openly."
"Don't you think it's a pity?"
The ending tone is lingering, as if chewing on a belated regret.
On a restless and out-of-control rainy night, the shadows of buildings are scattered and the street lights form a hazy sea.
On the plastic track, two figures were locked in a stalemate. Amidst the patter of rain, she distinctly heard Bo Yi mutter a low, hoarse curse.
"Fuck, if I had known I wouldn't have carried a battery pack."
My head buzzed and went blank.
It's not anger, it's not astonishment, it's enlightenment.
As if she hadn't heard clearly, she found it ridiculous. Her fingers slid down his neck one by one, as if peeling off a scab on a wound.
Suddenly she felt the air under the umbrella was so thin that it made her lungs ache.
She took a step back, gave up the umbrella, and withdrew from the boy's reckless world.
The wind was so strong tonight that it blew the baseball cap on her head away and flew to a far corner.
In the trembling shadow of the solitary lamp, thousands of raindrops hit the cheeks hard, making people sober for a moment.
"Why?"
Why do you have to pull a stranger out of the quagmire who is isolated by the entire high school world?
Why would the proud son of heaven, who is so high and mighty, bow his head to look at a shadow that hates him?
Fate is such a joke.
But it's not funny at all.
Too cold, too long, too unrestricted.
Bo Xi was eager to pull her back to him, but the girl dodged to the side. He stared at her with amusement and shrugged lazily.
"I'm free."
Bai Luo's eyes suddenly turned red at his two light words.
Wet. Hot. Crushed.
Who has so much free time that he would kick and explode the school electrical box?
But he did it, and he smiled as if he deserved a beating, as if he had won the world.
She slowed her breathing and calmly glanced at the pink snow mountain rose hidden behind the ginkgo tree trunk that had shed its leaves.
I guess he prepared this "romance" for himself.
But she hated roses.
Too delicate. Too sassy. Too grand. Too hypocritical.
She prefers thorns.
Poisonous, prickly thorns growing on the ruins.
Roses wither easily, but their thorns remain forever, always growing towards the light, never bending, breaking, or kneeling.
Always sharp, always dangerous, always reminding the world: Don’t get close, you will bleed.
She was born a rose thorn.
But now, someone pierced through and came against the light.
The rain kept falling. In the mud, their shadows twisted and overlapped, like two thorns entwined and growing wildly.
Across the lingering rainstorm that had lasted from when he was eighteen, Bai Luo fell directly into a pair of arrogant eyes.
He gave an order lightly.
"I ask, you answer. Just say 'yes' or 'no'. One more word, and you lose."
Bo Xi held a black umbrella in his hand, with the ribs tilted towards her to form an absolute barrier.
He noticed something was wrong with the girl and stopped all the laughter and nonsense.
"good."
Autumn is the season of parting.
Dead leaves retreat. Flower seeds scatter. Wild geese fly south.
It's just an escape.
The whole world is saying goodbye, but some people refuse to accept their fate.
Bai Luo hesitated to speak, and after a while asked a question that was entangled with the rain.
"You were the one who saved me and put the military uniform over my head at the end of the military training in my freshman year of high school, right?"
The sound of the wind was strong and fast, but it was no match for the young man's low, single-syllable word.
"yes."
My heart suddenly skipped a beat.
It's not an illusion, it's really him.
The owner of the military training uniform she had hidden for six years was the person she hated most in high school and is now her boyfriend.
Is it fate, redemption, or belated recognition?
She doesn't know.
"That night, my first kiss was lost. The power outage must have been man-made."
"yes."
The heartbeat became blank.
She was anxious to see her mother outside the school, and had no way to skip classes. But the lights went out, the world was dark, and she sneaked away.
I naively thought that fate had made an exception and shown mercy.
But it turned out that it was not God's will, but the young man's instigation.
"That thug from vocational high school who always blocks my way home from school has a broken leg. You were the one who did it, right?"
"yes."
My heart trembled.
No wonder the little thug disappeared. She thought she had escaped a disaster, that it was karma and the evil would be destroyed.
But it turned out that there was someone who was more cruel than evil and cut off the thorns with his own hands.
"Your mother is here for the Senior Year Centennial Oath-taking Ceremony."
"yes."
Boom! My heartbeat went blank.
She was not mistaken that afternoon. The eye-catching luxury car and the elegant lady at the gate of Nanhuai No. 1 Middle School were his mother.
It was the light he prayed for, and it was the red carpet he secretly laid out for her.
She foolishly thought she was lucky, but it turned out that he was the one lighting the lamp for her in the dark from beginning to end.
"You were the one who added a line of words below my two lines on the graffiti wall on the rooftop of the Art Building, right?"
"yes."
Heartbeat, out of control.
It rained heavily that day. She skipped classes and sat alone on the rooftop smoking, thinking that the whole world had forgotten her.
But it turned out that he was also there, quietly watching her. After she left, he stood in front of the wall and carved her unspoken dream on the wall, stroke by stroke.
"Is it you who pieced together my torn-up apology letter and kept it in the broadcasting room?"
"yes."
My heart is beating out of rhythm.
She didn't understand how he could pick up a pile of scraps of paper from the trash can and treat them as treasures?
Under the light, pieces were pieced together, transparent tape carefully sealing the cracks. They were neatly stacked in a corner of the broadcasting room, like evidence of her youthful recklessness.
"The ring, you must have worn it on purpose."
"yes."
My heartbeats, my frames are stuck. It feels like the world is freezing.
Even though I knew that wearing a second-hand ring would bring bad luck, I still insisted on wearing it and wore it for three years.
Let all the luck come to her, and you will bear the bad luck forever.
Pure madness.
"Your earrings are made from melted down necklaces, right?"
"yes."
My heart collapsed for a moment.
That night, she fled in a panic, and the boy pulled off the necklace from her neck.
I thought he would throw the necklace into the sewer to feed the rats, but unexpectedly, it was forged into a sharp earring.
The earrings are embedded in the ear bones, close to the pulse and heartbeat, day and night.
"You deliberately squatted under the streetlight in the alley during your freshman and sophomore years."
"yes."
Heartbeat, out of order. Just like love.
No wonder I ran into him every night without fail after the murder broke out in the old city.
It turns out that it wasn't an encounter, not a coincidence, not destiny, and not a teenage middle school syndrome attack.
It was him who was afraid that she was afraid of the dark, afraid that she would walk at night, and afraid that she would go home alone.
She naively thought it was fate, but it turned out that everything was a trap set by him.
When there are too many coincidences, they are no longer coincidences.
It's a conspiracy. It's an obsessive addiction. It's a murderous romance.
She was never lucky.
But she was lucky that her surname was Bo.
It was him who, in the dark night that she didn't know, blocked the knife for her, cleared the way, and took control of the situation.
There are some things that should have been said clearly on that night of heavy rain and power outage. But she was scared, and he didn't pursue her.
The light "yes" was wrapped in the regrets of youth and remained in my heart for so many years.
The black rain blinded his pupils.
Bai Luo looked at him as if he was looking at a disaster from which he could not escape unscathed.
Deep. Painful. Like autumn blown through by the wind.
I wanted to laugh, but the corners of my mouth turned up in a sarcastic arc, which was more sad than crying.
I wanted to scold him for being nosy and self-indulgent, but my throat was blocked by sobs.
It’s “Why didn’t you say it?”, “Why didn’t you say it earlier?”, “Why the hell are you admitting it now?”
The world is rotten, full of hypocrisy, utilitarianism, and performance.
Life is just like this.
But she happened to be so lucky, so lucky, that she ran into the coldest, most paranoid and most unreasonable boy in the world.
Yet he is the dumbest, most boring, and best boy.
Her youth was filled with regrets because of him.
It turns out that the most painful thing is not not meeting, but being so close but missing each other for so long.
It turns out that the most painful thing is not not getting it, but that they could have held hands and walked towards each other earlier.
The pounding heart shattered into pieces of sharp silence.
With trembling lips, he murmured.
"Why do you do that?"
Why should she win at every step?
Why did you quietly pave the way for her?
Why should I stand behind her and stitch up her rotten youth stitch by stitch?
Why did he use his crazy and paranoid methods to drag her into the light?
Why should I pick up all her fragments and embed them into my own flesh and blood?
Why did he quietly turn all her escape routes into his own gamble?
What she feared most was never dying alone with no one to love her. What she feared was that his love was like an assassination, silent but deadly.
He rewrote all her coincidences into his destiny, leaving her no chance to even play dumb.
He came earlier than the night and occupied her world.
It turns out that some ties cannot be severed by blood.
The wind blew away the dead leaves on the plastic track, just like them passing by.
Shadows were scattered a thousand times by the rainstorm. Bo Yi looked at the tear-stained girl and smiled, his smile only making it more obvious.
There is also a sense of calmness that comes from having nothing to lose.
"You're worth it."
It's worth him betting his whole life on her.
He lost a long time ago and was defeated a long time ago.
I've walked past her classroom window countless times just to take a peek.
——Like believers on a pilgrimage.
It's just that he is too arrogant, too cruel, and too unwilling to bow his head.
The rebellious spirit of young people always grows towards the sun.
Always bow to her and lose for her.
Bai Luo lowered his head, and a tear fell on the back of his hand, hot, like a rain that was long overdue.
"Isn't that stupid?"
It was pure madness, but she was moved by it.
It's quite stupid.
But he was willing.
＿＿
Bai Luo blinked his wet eyelashes, his eyes gradually coming back to his senses, cold and clear.
Outside the window, the fallen leaves, which have been reincarnated countless times, dance in the endless autumn.
When I refreshed the forum page, an explosive post caught my eye.
——The most talented woman in the law department confesses her love to Bo Qi.
???
Bai Luo frowned.
Cold fingers scrolled across the screen inch by inch.
[What's going on? Confessing so early in the morning? Are you so impatient?]
[But they were pretty good together. I remember they were photographed at the beginning of their freshman year.]
[This confession was probably planned a long time ago. I hope they can succeed. Lock it in!]
…
…
The next second, the wind direction suddenly changed.
[Some people think the whole world is a show when no one is pursuing them. If they are pursuing you in both directions, what does it have to do with you?]
[Those who say showing off affection leads to a quick death, I suggest you check if you have a partner before you speak.]
[Don't think I don't know who's spreading rumors about her on the anonymous wall. If you have the guts, tell her to her face. You mean bastard.]
…
…
Reverse and reverse again.
[Huh? Bo Qi rejected me? He said he has a girlfriend?]
[Hilarious! When he took off his coat, his neck was covered in bite marks. Whose girlfriend did this?]
[The live video is here! It's blurry but exciting, so I recommend watching it in full screen.]
There really is a video.
The picture is shaking and the focus is blurry, which shows that the photo was taken secretly while squatting.
＿＿
In the video, Meng Ning stands in the center holding a bouquet of cigarettes.
The cigarettes are custom-made, the flowers are carefully matched, and the color combination is as cold as the eyes and eyebrows of a young boy.
It was obviously organized by himself, with great attention to detail, and the sense of ceremony was overwhelming.
A sleepy-looking boy with curly silver-gray hair glared coldly at the man who was frantically confessing his love so early in the morning with half-closed eyes.
She lowered her eyes to glance at the carefully arranged flowers, her tone distant.
"You're really capable of doing something so early in the morning? Sending cigarettes and flowers, Meng Ning, are you really not afraid that I'll call the police?"
Meng Ning put his hands on his hips and puffed out his chest, his face neither red nor out of breath.
"This is called a sense of ritual. The whole school knows that I, Meng Ning, am pursuing you. There's no point in hiding!"
The surroundings suddenly became quiet, and students at the school gate began to look around.
"Oh, chasing me?"
His voice was hoarse, and the ending tone was drawn out lazily, with a hint of nonchalant mockery.
"With all the drama you've put on me, someone who doesn't know would think I owe you eight million."
"Of course not."
Meng Ning curved his lips into a smile and took a step forward without any stage fright.
"If you don't agree, I'll put a bouquet at the school gate every day. I'll also arrange cigarettes, flowers, and a barbecue grill. I just want to ask you if you can handle it!"
“Tsk.”
Bo Xi narrowed his eyes and spoke in a lazy but sharp tone.
"Are you confessing your feelings, or are you trying to send me away?"
Meng Ning pushed the bouquet forward, his eyes shining.
"Take it! I put this together after staying up late. Isn't it thoughtful?"
Probably not wanting to make things too embarrassing, Bo Xi casually took a cigarette and lit it.
"Next time, don't do all these fancy things. Just treat me to a meal. Isn't that better than that?"
The tone was light and joking, but the rejection in the words was too clear to be misunderstood.
He pushed the flower back a little and added.
"Don't hang yourself on this crooked tree of mine, okay?"
After saying this, he turned and left. His back looked arrogant and casual.
There was a small trash can in the security room at the school gate. As Bo Xi walked, he took off his coat, which was stained with the night air, and threw it away.
The sun's rays were scorching, pouring down on him mercilessly. His neck, collarbone, and shoulder line were covered in layers of ambiguous red marks.
It's so bright and naked that it can't be covered at all.
Meng Ning's eyes trembled, and his eyes gradually turned red.
She finally understood.
She's not bad enough, she's just not crazy enough.
But he only plays with the crazy ones and doesn't raise the obedient ones.
A group of people who were watching the fun were snapping photos crazily.
"Damn, this hickey was made with a seal, right?"
"Did this guy parachute directly into the school from the nightclub battlefield overnight?"
People like Bo Xi were not born to belong to anyone.
But he just belongs to Bai Luo.
＿＿
Bai Luo, who was originally drowsy, stared at the video in a daze and finally woke up completely.
No one is crazier than Bo Yi.
He made the official announcement live on the entire internet, and clearly engraved "I have a girlfriend" on his forehead, as if he was afraid that no one would know that he was in love.
Forget it, let him be. As long as Young Master Bo is happy, that's all that matters.
Just make it public, she can't escape it anyway.
She was too lazy to take another look at the storm of public opinion, so she went to the living room and poured herself a glass of warm water. The liquid went down her throat, temporarily relieving her hoarseness.
His movements were fierce, and she couldn't help but moan. He also put his ear close to hers and smiled mischievously.
"That sounds damn good."
But he blocked her lips and swallowed her broken breath harshly.
The boy is bad to the core, but he seems to be justified, as if the whole world should make way for him.
Finally, sleepiness attacked my head, my eyelids drooped, my consciousness became blurred, and I felt drowsy.
If you lose to him, you won’t even be able to escape your dreams.
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