First birthday celebration (Zhuazhou)
The Grand Canal Transport Festival arrived as scheduled, with colorful flags waving along the banks.
To demonstrate the imperial court's emphasis on the Grand Canal, the emperor and empress held a grand celebration at the newly built Grand Canal transport hub square.
Officials gathered in large numbers, and representatives of the canal workers and local residents were also invited to attend the ceremony.
The highlight of the celebration was, of course, Princess Taiping's "first birthday celebration" ceremony.
A thick carpet was laid in the center, covered with various objects: a replica of the imperial seal, the "Rules for Women", a gold abacus, an official seal, a writing brush, a small model of a grain transport boat, a bronze buoy made by Li Xian, and even a small decorative wooden mallet.
Wu Zetian, holding the newly dressed Princess Taiping, gently encouraged her, "Taiping, go and choose one you like."
Li Zhi watched with a smile, while the courtiers held their breath.
Taiping wobbled as she crawled toward the center of the carpet, her big, round eyes curiously surveying her surroundings.
She was first attracted by the shiny golden abacus, touched it with her little hand, and then let go.
His gaze shifted to the "Rules for Women," and he climbed directly over it. Some of the officials nodded slightly.
However, Taiping climbed straight over the book and grabbed the exquisitely crafted model of the canal boat!
"Excellent!" Emperor Taizong was overjoyed. "My peace is tied to the Grand Canal transport!"
(OS: She really has good taste!)
But the story isn't over yet.
Little Taiping continued crawling, holding the model of the canal boat in one hand, while her other little hand firmly grasped the small wooden mallet that represented the law!
A canoe in one hand and a wooden mallet in the other.
The officials whispered among themselves, and Di Renjie's eyes revealed a look of admiration.
Wu Zetian and Li Zhi exchanged a knowing smile.
After the ceremony, an unexpected change occurred.
A commotion suddenly arose on the outskirts of the crowd.
A man dressed as a canal worker broke through the guards' obstruction, knelt down, and cried out, "Your Majesty! Your Majesty! I have been wronged! The canal guild of Xuzhou is withholding wages and treating human life like dirt!"
The guards rushed forward to stop them, and the scene descended into chaos.
Taiping, who was being held in her mother's arms, seemed to be startled by the sudden commotion and burst into tears. Her little hand loosened, and the small wooden mallet fell straight down with a "thud" onto the ground right in front of the man.
As if by some predetermined fate, the scene fell silent instantly.
The man was also stunned, looking up at the emperor and empress, as well as the crying little princess.
While gently patting her daughter to comfort her, Wu Meiniang nodded slightly to Di Renjie.
Di Renjie immediately stepped forward: "Your Majesty, Your Majesty, I will certainly investigate this matter thoroughly."
Li Zhi said in a deep voice, "Approved. Investigate thoroughly, no matter who is involved."
Taiping was still sobbing, burying her little face in her mother's neck, while the canal boat model was still tightly held in her other little hand.
Just as Di Renjie's investigation was making progress, he encountered a major problem—Wang Wu, the canal worker who had cried foul, was poisoned despite being under tight protection!
Fortunately, they discovered it early and the person was rescued, but was terrified.
Upon hearing the news, the guesthouse was immediately thrown into a flurry of activity.
(OS: This is practically a Tang Dynasty version of "Empresses in the Palace"!)
Li Zhi was so angry he wanted to smash the cup, but when he looked at Princess Taiping playing with a cloth tiger next to him, he held back.
Wu Zetian, holding her drooling baby daughter who was teething, paced around the room, saying, "Looks like someone's getting restless."
At this moment, Judge Di arrived with newly discovered evidence—half a piece of jade of very poor quality, and several letters that had been blurred by water.
"Your Majesty, Your Highness, these were found at Wang Wu's residence, but the trail ends there."
Just as the adults were worrying about the evidence, Taiping, who was in Wu Meiniang's arms, suddenly lit up. She stretched out her chubby little hand, accurately grabbed the half of the jade pendant, and stuffed it into her mouth without saying a word.
"Oh my little darling, you can't eat this!" Wu Meiniang quickly tried to save the jade pendant.
The "delicious food" that was about to be eaten flew away, and Taiping's little mouth twitched, and she burst into tears. Her little feet kicked wildly, kicking away the pieces of letter paper.
Fragments flew everywhere, and one of them drifted down and landed right in Di Renjie's teacup.
"This...this..." Lord Di was about to feel sorry for the evidence when he suddenly stared at the teacup and froze—a blurry mark slowly appeared on the tea-soaked fragment!
(OS: Could this be considered the first case of a baby helping to solve a crime?)
Three days later, at the residence of a nobleman in Chang'an.
Di Renjie arrived with his men, smiling as he held up the restored fragment: "Duke Zhao, does this monogram look familiar to you?"
The guard standing behind him was holding a small rattle drum—a tool for solving cases "sponsored" by Princess Taiping.
The atmosphere in the flower hall of the Duke of Zhao's mansion was extremely awkward.
Di Renjie held up the piece of paper with the monogram printed on it, smiling broadly: "Lord Duke, this mark seems to be exactly the same as the mark on the documents for transporting grain between your household and others."
(OS: Caught red-handed, let's see how you deny it!)
Duke Zhao's face turned from pale to ashen, but he forced himself to remain calm: "Lord Di is joking. This must be a frame-up..."
Before he finished speaking, a rattle drum suddenly "accidentally" fell out of the bodyguard behind Di Renjie.
"Thump, thump—"
The crisp sound of the drums was particularly jarring in the quiet flower hall.
Duke Zhao shuddered, suddenly recalling the rumors circulating in Chang'an recently:
When Princess Taiping's rattle drum sounds, it means she's about to spank the bad guys!
“This, this is…” he pointed to the rattle drum, his voice trembling.
Di Renjie bent down to pick up the rattle drum and gently shook it: "Oh, this is a token of justice bestowed upon me by Her Highness the Princess. Would the Duke like to listen carefully?"
"Thump, thump—"
Duke Zhao's legs went weak, and he knelt down: "I confess! I confess everything! Just please don't let Her Highness the Princess shake her rattle at me!"
(OS: I never imagined that Taiping's baby toys could have such a deterrent effect!)
Three days later, inside the guesthouse.
When the case report was presented, Wu Meiniang laughed as she read it: "This Duke of Zhao was actually scared out of his wits by a rattle drum?"
Li Zhi held Taiping, who was chewing on a teething toy, and was overjoyed: "My Taiping, who is not even a year old, has helped the court solve such a big case!"
Little Taiping had no idea what was happening; he just happily drooled as he stuffed the teething toy into his father's mouth.
Di Renjie, suppressing a laugh, reported: "Your Majesty, the Duke of Zhao has confessed to everything, the withheld wages have been returned in full, and all those involved have been detained. He also specifically requested that the princess's rattle drum be kept away from the imperial prison..."
——
[Mini-Theater: Chang'an's New Fashion]
1.
Overnight, all the rattle drums in Chang'an City sold out.
It is said that various noble families bought several of them and practiced at home every day to listen to the drumbeats without trembling.
2.
Prince Hong strongly requested to lend his own jade seal to Lord Di for his investigation, but was politely refused and remained sullen for the entire day.
3.
The Second Prince Xian worked through the night to modify the rattle drum, claiming he would create an upgraded version that "can shake automatically," but ended up puncturing the drumhead.
4.
Now, officials are extra careful when attending court, fearing that some colleague might drop a rattle drum from their arms.
5.
The worst off was the three-year-old grandson of the Duke of Zhao's family; all his rattles were confiscated after that day.
(It seems that for a long time to come, the rattle drum will be the most feared "instrument of torture" in Chang'an. Meanwhile, our Princess Taiping continues to happily drool and chew on her teething stick every day, completely unaware that she has become the beloved and feared little tyrant of the court and the public.)
[Mini-drama: The Princess's "Judgment"]
(Idle Talk in the Imperial Harem)
The results of the baby's first birthday celebration quickly spread throughout the court and the public: "He will be in charge of the grain transport and uphold the law."
No one dared to treat the princess lightly anymore because of her young age.
Wang Wu, the canal worker who disrupted the ceremony that day, was not punished afterward, but was instead properly protected by Lord Di.
It is said that he would tell everyone he met, "It was Her Highness the Princess's little wooden mallet that gave me courage!"
Prince Hong studied even harder, saying, "Even my younger sister knows the importance of laws and regulations; how can I, as her elder brother, fall behind?"
The Second Prince Xian devoted himself to improving his buoy, vowing to create a sturdy model that "would not break if his sister were to drop it."
Most interestingly, if officials subsequently shirked responsibility or argued over matters related to the Grand Canal, Lord Di would sometimes casually remark, "Perhaps you gentlemen wish to hear the sound of Her Highness the Princess's gavel?"
The debate usually ends immediately.
And what about our Princess Taiping?
She had no memory of that day, but she was particularly fond of the canal boat model, and even slept with it in her arms.
As for the small wooden mallet? It's long since been thrown away in some corner.
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