"It's because I can see the 'emoji' above your head!"
With a scream from Lin Wanwan, her voice trembling with tears, this sentence, which no historian of the entire Dali Dynasty could comprehend, echoed through the deathly silent bedchamber of Kunning Palace.
Xiao Che's handsome face, which was tense with anger, froze instantly.
He was as if struck by lightning, frozen in place. He even forgot how to take the next step with his feet, which were about to move forward.
He maintained a dignified posture, ready to reprimand the mad queen and restore the husbandly authority... no, the imperial authority, but his mind suddenly went blank.
What...what did he hear?
Emoji?
What kind of bag is that?
A Hermès bag? An LV bag? Or is it... takeout from the market?
No, that's not right! The key point is, the top of his head?!
Xiao Che instinctively reached out to touch his head. "My dragon crown is on perfectly fine, where did this bag come from?"
He was completely stunned. Looking at Lin Wanwan, who was crying her eyes out and struggling to breathe, for the first time, his deep phoenix eyes revealed a pure bewilderment and confusion, just like when the young prince first learned arithmetic.
"...What...bag?"
He managed to squeeze out those three words with difficulty. His voice was dry, trembling without him even realizing it.
At this moment, all imperial majesty, cognitive barriers, and the absurdity of time travelers were shattered by these three unheard-of words.
Seeing his dumbfounded state, Lin Wanwan's overwhelming sense of injustice transformed into a desperate, all-or-nothing resolve.
You don't believe me?
You think I'm being ridiculous?
Alright! Today, I'll show you what real "nonsense" really means!
Today, either you cripple my madness, or I'll crush your values and rub them into the ground repeatedly!
"It's okay if you don't know what emojis are!" Lin Wanwan wiped away her tears and began her long-planned "massive public execution of the emperor's dark history" with great emotion!
With red eyes, she glared at him intently, like a spirited little hen, and began her "evidence presentation"!
"Do you remember the night we married to ward off bad luck?!"
Xiao Che certainly remembered that night. He was seriously ill and filled with murderous intent. He was wary and disgusted with this so-called "bringing good luck" empress.
"Back then, you were pale-faced and had a sinister look in your eyes, which terrified all the palace servants!" Lin Wanwan said, imitating his appearance vividly. "But I know that's not what you really thought at the time!"
“Because!” she emphasized, as if presenting crucial evidence in court, “there’s a tiny, trembling figure floating above your head! And next to it is a line of text—【trembling.gif】!”
Xiao Che: "!!!"
The color drained from his face in an instant. He was struck dumb, and his steps went backward uncontrollably.
How...how is this possible?!
That night, he truly... truly trembled due to his physical weakness and fear of the unknown. But he believed he had concealed it perfectly! How... how did she know?!
Seeing his horrified expression, Lin Wanwan knew she was right, and her confidence soared. She continued to unleash her full power!
"And another thing! Later, when the eunuch brought you the medicine, you frowned and looked disgusted, right?"
Xiao Che's lips began to tremble uncontrollably.
"But what's on your head isn't disgust at all!" Lin Wanwan's voice became a little shrill with excitement. "What's on your head is a crying cartoon face! And next to it is written—【Medicine is so bitter qAq.jpg】!"
That's why I dared to take out the candied fruit from my sleeve and hand it to you!
Xiao Che's brain exploded with a "boom".
So that's how it is!
So that's how it is!
He always thought it was because she was incredibly audacious, or... had ulterior motives. He even secretly investigated her for a long time to find out who was behind her.
But the truth is... because there was a line floating above his head... something like "The medicine is so bitter qAq?!"
This is a hundred times more absurd than the fact that she is a time traveler!
He was completely dumbfounded, standing there blankly like a weathered stone statue, his brain utterly unable to process the unbelievable information before him.
Lin Wanwan's "recap" is still ongoing!
"And then there was your first time paying respects to the Empress Dowager! You remained expressionless the entire time, pretending it was none of your business! But when the Empress Dowager started lecturing, the emoji above your head turned into 'Help!.jpg'!"
"That's why I 'happened' to faint, to help you out of that predicament!"
"And Consort Shu!" Lin Wanwan got angry just thinking about this useless teammate. "She provoked me in the Imperial Garden, and you hid behind the rockery! You didn't say anything, but there was a huge '[Fight her! Don't be a coward!.gif]' floating above your head!"
"If I hadn't seen your 'divine will,' would I have been so bored as to go head-to-head with the Empress Dowager's niece!"
Xiao Che's face was beyond pale.
It was a kind of thing where someone had stripped naked and hung on the city wall for public display, with a variety of colors including blue, white, red, and purple!
His breathing became extremely heavy.
He looked at Lin Wanwan, his gaze shifting from initial suspicion and anger to... an extreme, shattered sense of shock and panic.
This is terrifying!
This is even more terrifying than mind reading!
All his thoughts, all his pretenses, all his deepest secrets that even he himself was ashamed to admit, were actually being broadcast live to her in a way he couldn't understand at all—in the form of a "cartoon character"?!
So, what kind of image has he had in her eyes all these years?!
A tsundere who says one thing but does another? A split-personality emperor with an inner monologue so dramatic it could be a whole opera?!
"And more! And more!" Lin Wanwan was already in a frenzy and couldn't stop. She was going to pour out all the grievances she had suffered over the years from "interpreting pictures and making statements"!
“That Consort Su Jinxiu! She pretended to play the zither in the Imperial Garden, and everyone praised her talent. You even nodded in agreement, didn’t you?!”
Xiao Che's body began to tremble slightly.
"But what does it say above your head?! It says above your head—【So pretentious, your toes have dug out a three-bedroom apartment.gif】!"
"puff--"
Even with the tense atmosphere, Xiao Che almost spat out a mouthful of blood.
Toes...carved out a three-bedroom apartment?!
Was that what he was thinking at the time?! How come he doesn't remember?!
"And then, at the palace banquet, the Regent was hypocritically toasting you, and you smiled and raised your glass in return. Everyone thought you two were on good terms!" Lin Wanwan's eyes reddened again. "But only I! Only I saw it! Above your head, in his direction, there was a constantly flashing, hideous—[skull.gif]!"
In that instant, every hair on Xiao Che's body stood on end!
He suddenly looked up and stared intently at Lin Wanwan.
This matter… this matter was his greatest secret! It was the ultimate signal that he harbored murderous intentions towards the Regent! He had never revealed it to anyone but himself!
And she... even knew that!
evidence.
Ironclad evidence.
Each and every one of these things represents his inner thoughts, which only he himself knows.
These absurd, shameful, and secretive "chains of evidence" were like merciless hammers, smashing Xiao Che's emperor-like, hard, and suspicious heart to pieces.
All his doubts, all his anger, all his disbelief crumbled at that moment.
All that remained was... endless shock, and a kind of... profound bewilderment after a sudden realization.
He looked at Lin Wanwan, the woman who was still sobbing, yet stubbornly straightened her back.
He finally understood.
Everything is clear now.
It turns out she wasn't bold, nor was she truly stupid.
It turns out that she wasn't truly a prophet, nor could she always guess his thoughts.
It turns out that what she meant by "describe the picture" wasn't the expression on his face, but rather... that damned "emoji" above his head that he himself couldn't even see!
So this is the most absurd yet most real truth hidden behind all the secrets!
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