Since the decision has been made to stage a spectacular show, the script naturally needs to be carefully polished.
The following day, contrary to its usual practice, Kunning Palace closed its gates and refused all visits. The stated reason given was that the Empress had been frightened and was unwell, requiring rest; and that His Majesty, being benevolent, was personally accompanying her in the palace to ease her burdens.
However, the atmosphere inside the Kunning Palace study at this moment had absolutely nothing to do with the word "quiet recuperation".
The Emperor and Empress dismissed all the eunuchs, closed the door, and were holding a top-secret "script reading session" that concerned the fate of the nation.
"No, no, this part is too fake!"
Lin Wanwan slammed her hand on the table and, facing Xiao Che who was sitting upright and reciting his lines with a serious expression, delivered a merciless critique from the "golden screenwriter."
Interrupted, Xiao Che's handsome brows furrowed slightly, a hint of confusion on his face. He looked down at the "lines" he had written himself—every word a gem, every sentence piercing the heart—how could they be fake?
“Where is the lie?” he asked indignantly. “I rebuked you, saying, ‘As the mistress of the harem, you do not think about continuing the family line, but instead interfere with the system of female officials all day long. This is like a hen crowing at dawn, a sign of chaos in the court!’ Isn’t that harsh enough? Isn’t that resolute enough?”
Lin Wanwan rubbed her forehead, feeling a sudden headache.
Looking at the sharp-tongued emperor before her, who had rendered the regent speechless in court, she realized for the first time that arguing was an art that required talent. And clearly, their emperor's talent lay entirely in his "straight-man" style of blunt confrontation.
“Your Majesty, it’s ruthless enough, but it’s precisely because it’s too ruthless that it feels fake.” Lin Wanwan patiently began her “screenwriting lesson.”
“Think about it, what was our relationship before? We were a loving couple recognized by all the officials. Only a few days have passed, and you’ve already accused me of ‘disrupting the court’ over such a ‘trivial’ matter as a female official. This isn’t called a break, this is called going crazy.”
She paused, then said in a persuasive tone, "What you need to express is not the kind of furious anger that makes you want to kill me right now, or the kind of disappointment that makes you feel like I'm not living up to your potential. It's more like... disappointment."
"A feeling of disappointment and exhaustion, of being betrayed by the closest person, like 'I trusted you so much, yet you put me in such a difficult position.'"
"Disappointed?" Xiao Che repeated the word thoughtfully, as if he had some understanding.
“Yes, disappointing.” Lin Wanwan snapped her fingers and continued to explain in more detail, “Look, the script can be changed like this. Tomorrow morning at court, an imperial censor will point out that too many women from poor families have been selected for the position of female officials, which violates ancestral rules. At this time, you should not get angry immediately, but remain silent first.”
"silence?"
"Yes, silence. You sit on the dragon throne, expressionless, watching the arguing ministers below, without uttering a word. Your silence will create immense pressure and leave everyone guessing what you are thinking."
"Then, slowly, turn your gaze toward the screen where I am." Lin Wanwan's eyes sparkled; her directorial urges were already kicking in. "Your eyes shouldn't carry any anger, they should be calm, but beneath that calmness, there should be a hint of... a complexity I can't decipher. As if asking: 'Is this your answer to me?'"
Xiao Che listened intently, and subconsciously followed her guidance, beginning to cultivate his emotions.
Seeing that he was on the right track, Lin Wanwan continued, "After the court officials have finished arguing, you can gently sigh."
She demonstrated it herself; the sigh was so soft it was almost inaudible, yet it was filled with endless weariness and disappointment.
"Then, you delivered your lines in a very flat, even slightly hoarse tone." Lin Wanwan lowered her voice, mimicking Xiao Che's tone, and slowly said, "'The Empress... has been inconsiderate and overstepped her bounds.'"
She raised her eyes and looked at Xiao Che: "Your Majesty, please consider this. Which statement is more hurtful: 'A hen crowing at dawn brings chaos to the court' or 'Lacking foresight leads to overstepping one's bounds'?"
Xiao Che carefully savored these two sentences.
The former is a thunderous charge, a high-profile rebuke.
The latter, however, is a nonchalant assessment, a heartfelt disappointment that completely negates the other party.
The former evokes anger, while the latter chills the heart.
He instantly grasped the essence of it!
"I... understand." He looked at Lin Wanwan, his eyes revealing for the first time genuine admiration for her "art of arguing."
"That's more like it." Lin Wanwan nodded in satisfaction, feeling that she had nurtured a potential movie star.
However, Xiao Che's dignity as a "sharp-tongued emperor" clearly wouldn't allow him to be outdone like this. He cleared his throat and proposed his new "script".
"Alright, I'll listen to you on this part. But in the end, the decree for confinement must be issued by me!" He picked up his pen and wrote furiously, reciting his new lines, "'Guards! The Empress has acted immorally. From this moment on, she is confined to Kunning Palace for one month! The Phoenix Seal is revoked and handed over to the Empress Dowager for safekeeping!' How about that? This is both a punishment and a transfer of power. Isn't that ruthless enough?"
After listening, Lin Wanwan fell silent again.
Looking at Xiao Che's "praise me" expression, she couldn't help but burst out laughing.
"Your Majesty, why do you always want to achieve everything at once? You have to eat one bite at a time, and you have to act one scene at a time!" She shook her head helplessly.
“Our goal this time is to ‘break ties,’ not to ‘depose the empress.’ If you issue this decree, the Regent will probably be so happy that he’ll do somersaults on the spot in the Golden Palace. If we overdo the act, it will only arouse his suspicion.”
"Then what do you suggest?" Xiao Che asked again humbly.
"The decree must be issued. But it cannot be issued like this." Lin Wanwan picked up his pen and crossed out the sentence "reclaim the Phoenix Seal".
“All you need to do is say: ‘The Empress is immoral and is confined to Kunning Palace for a month to reflect on her actions!’ Then,” she raised her head, winking mischievously, “and leave. Don’t say anything more, leave them with endless room for imagination.”
“A simple ‘reflection’ is enough. It means that you haven’t yet made a final judgment on my ‘crimes’ and are still giving me a chance. This is consistent with the foundation of our previous affection and also shows your complex emotions of ‘being angry at my lack of self-respect’ at this moment. This is what a well-structured breakup is.”
Looking at the script she had revised, and comparing it to his own simple and crude lines, Xiao Che was completely... impressed.
He discovered that his proud sharp tongue and scheming were nothing compared to Lin Wanwan's subtle yet powerful "green tea" style of arguing!
"Alright, let's go through it again from the beginning." Lin Wanwan clapped her hands, enthusiastically entering director mode. "Your Majesty, you are the Emperor, and I am the Empress. Now, begin!"
So, the entire afternoon was filled with a farcical "performance lesson" in the study of Kunning Palace.
"No, no, your gaze here is too fierce! You're going to be disappointed! I'm not trying to kill you!"
"Your Majesty, sigh! Remember to sigh! Embody that utterly hopeless feeling you had when you were reviewing memorials!"
"Stop! Your gesture of flinching is too much! You are the emperor, not a street urchin! Control yourself! The smaller the gesture, the more angry you appear!"
Xiao Che went from being unconvinced at first, to humbly seeking advice, and finally... enjoying it.
He discovered that this feeling of transforming what should have been a tense and deadly conspiracy into a tacitly understood private game between the two of them was actually... damn interesting!
Looking at the empress before him, who was beaming and giving him advice on how to govern the country, and seeing the cunning and wisdom gleaming in her eyes, he felt a certain part of his heart being filled to the brim.
This was his empress.
To stand shoulder to shoulder with him on the cliff, chatting and laughing, plotting how to push the enemy into the abyss.
By the time the rehearsal ended, it was already dusk.
The afterglow of the setting sun shone through the window lattice and fell on Lin Wanwan, gilding her with a warm golden light.
Looking at the scene before him, Xiao Che was moved and felt a sense of unfinished business.
He slowly stood up, walked behind her, and gently pulled her into his arms from behind.
Lin Wanwan was tidying up the "scripts" on the table when she was taken aback by his sudden hug.
"The rehearsal is over, Your Majesty," she reminded softly.
"Mmm." Xiao Che gently rested his chin on her shoulder, his warm breath brushing against her ear.
He whispered in her ear in a magnetic voice that was both languid and wistful:
"Now I know why you always win."
“Your mouth,” he tilted his head slightly, gently touching her soft earlobe with his lips, his voice tinged with a hint of tenderness tinged with a hint of gritted teeth, “is a natural-born quarrelmaker.”
Lin Wanwan's ears burned from his teasing, and two blushes instantly rose to her cheeks.
She was about to retort when she inadvertently glanced at the emoji area above his head.
There, a cartoonish little emperor with a worried expression floated by, a giant question mark bubble above his head.
Inside the bubble, a line of small print flickered pitifully:
[What to do when you can't win an argument with your wife? Waiting for answers online.jpg]
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