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"Is this alright?" Zhou Ji'an looked around, afraid of being stared at, but gently placed his left hand over Deng Yi's eyes to shield him from the glaring light.
Deng Yi rested his head on her lap, and upon hearing her words, turned his face to her lower abdomen and relaxed, saying, "That's good."
The airport lounge wasn't as comfortable as he'd imagined. He lay crampedly on the sofa, his long arms and legs making him look uncomfortable, from Zhou Ji'an's perspective.
Her right fingertips glided through his glossy hair, just as he had done to her, lulling him to sleep.
On their last trip to Zhoushan, they flew economy class, so naturally there were no lounges available. It was also peak season then, and the airport was almost always full.
The two found an empty seat and immediately put down their bags to occupy it.
"Sit down and rest for a while." Deng Yi took out his bag and pulled her to sit down.
"Please sit down," Zhou Ji'an declined. He had been carrying the luggage all the way, and she wanted to share some of the burden, but he wouldn't let her.
He was much more tired than she was.
“I’m not tired,” Zhou Ji’an said. “I can sit on the ground.”
Deng Yi insisted that she sit down, and Zhou Ji'an thought long and hard before coming up with a solution that he might agree to: "You sit on the chair, and I'll sit on the floor. That way, I can lie on your lap and take a nap."
Deng Yi thought for a moment, took out a jacket from his bag, folded it twice and put it on the ground, then sat down, slapped his thigh and said, "Come over here."
He was very serious, and Zhou Jian chuckled. Facing him, she sat cross-legged on his clothes, resting her chin on his left knee. He smoothed her ponytail, pinched her chin, and teased, "Like a pretty little puppy."
Zhou Ji'an blushed, turned her head, and faced the outside of his thigh. As she closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep, she felt him gently stroking her head.
He really seems to treat her like a dog.
That short rest was unforgettable for Zhou Ji'an, as if his world had a fulcrum that would never change from then on.
The person on his lap began to breathe evenly. Zhou Ji'an called out "Deng Yi" but received no response.
He must be asleep.
Will he, like her, remember this short break for a long time?
As the announcement came on, Zhou Ji'an's fingertips slid from the bridge of Deng Yi's nose to the tip of his nose, and he said softly, "It's time to board."
Deng Yi didn't respond, but moved restlessly, burying his face almost entirely in her abdomen.
"Deng Yi." Zhou Ji'an tightened his core and called his name, "Deng Yi... wake up."
"I don't want to wake up."
His voice showed no sign of sleepiness, and Zhou Ji'an knew he had been teased again. He said angrily, "Go back to sleep, I'm leaving."
"I slept so well, I don't want to wake up," Deng Yi said with a smile, getting up and leaning close to her ear to give her a brief kiss. "I wish it could stay like this forever."
If that's the case, why did you prepare the divorce agreement so early?
Zhou Ji'an took a deep breath to calm his downcast mood, stood up and complained, "My legs are numb."
Deng Yiyi stood up, took her hand tightly, and said as they walked, "I'll give you a massage when we get to the hotel."
Zhou Ji'an said defiantly, "I'm numb right now."
Deng Yi responded to her with ease, "I'll carry you on my back."
His voice was loud, and some passersby looked over curiously. Zhou Ji'an even wanted to shake off his hand and board the plane alone.
But they were in a public place, so she couldn't do that. She could only head to her destination with mixed feelings.
The hotel turned out to be the same one they had stayed at before, and they even shared the same room.
However, Deng Yi never explicitly stated this fact, so Zhou Ji'an kept quiet and didn't ask.
Anyway, everything was arranged by him; he had his own reasons, just like when he suddenly appeared and made her have a fake marriage with him.
All she could do was cooperate with him.
"Are you hungry?" Deng Yi asked. "What would you like to eat?"
It was already past 7 p.m., and eating would affect her sleep. Zhou Ji'an wanted to skip dinner and go straight to bed, but since he had already asked, she could only ask in return, "What do you want to eat?"
Deng Yi took out the bed sheets, duvet cover, and pillowcases from his suitcase, placed them on the bed, and looked up to ask, "Want some instant noodles?"
Zhou Ji'an's breathing became extremely rapid and erratic. Deng Yi was not only replicating the route of their last trip to Zhoushan, but it seemed that he was also replicating the specific details.
That time, when Zhou Ji'an saw Deng Yi take out her own four-piece bedding set, he thought to himself, "That's great, I can sleep on sheets and blankets that no one else has ever slept on." On the other hand, he also thought that Deng Yi was really particular, and that if they dated for a long time, he might get tired of her, since she wasn't a particular person.
She was staying in a five-star hotel, but the first thing she did after arriving at the room was to ask him if he wanted instant noodles.
Last time, Deng Yi only refunded the business class ticket, not the hotel room, and he gave her a very good reason at the time.
He said, "It's peak tourist season now, and hotels and guesthouses are hard to book. You don't need to worry about it or split the cost of accommodation, because I spend just as much money even when I'm staying alone."
Perhaps, at that time, he wasn't worried about canceling the hotel he had already booked and not being able to book a cheaper hotel, but rather that he simply couldn't continue to make do.
"I'm not hungry, you eat, I want to rest." Zhou Ji'an walked over and helped him stretch out the sheet. He grabbed the two corners of the sheet and pulled hard, almost causing Zhou Ji'an to fall onto the bed.
She thought he was upset because she had spoiled the mood, so she stood up straight again and said, "I'll eat with you and then rest."
Deng Yi smoothed out the wrinkles in the sheets, unfolded the duvet cover, and cast many shadows on his face under the light. "I thought you would want to eat it."
Zhou Ji'an bent down to pick up the pillowcase and put it on the pillow. She glanced at Deng Yi, who was busy with his head down. It was an extremely brief glance. The past that she had intentionally or unintentionally forgotten and hidden was like a thousand troops trampling over the bridge that she had painstakingly built, the bridge that belonged to her to live a good life alone.
Over the years, she has always emphasized to herself that losing Deng Yi is not like losing a body organ. Losing Deng Yi is more like losing a summer breeze or a winter sun. Losing Deng Yi is at most like losing an autumn night or a spring day. It won't kill her. At most, when she sees him through the screen, she will think that he was her moon, and now he is someone else's moon.
Besides, the moon isn't visible 24 hours a day; moreover, the moon isn't something that can be possessed by any one person alone.
Let's just think of him as the moon in the sky.
"It's late, I won't be able to digest this." Zhou Ji'an uttered a casual remark, but a second later, he felt it wasn't romantic enough and wanted to swallow it back and rephrase it.
Deng Yi chuckled and unfolded the quilt with the cover, "You're completely different from before, as if you've become a rushing river."
Zhou Ji'an thought to himself, "See? See?" Deng Yi's words had a great atmosphere to them.
She patted the fluffy pillow and suddenly remembered that she seemed to have written something similar in the notebook Yu Xi had given her.
If she remembered correctly, one day she wrote only one line in her diary: “I can’t explain to you that I want to be a transparent river.”
She couldn't remember when she wrote that line, nor could she remember why she wrote it.
It's probably still an attempt to imitate Deng Yi's artistic style, or perhaps it's just a pretentious outburst born from the constant ridicule from the people in the dormitory.
"What was I like before? A stagnant pool?" Zhou Ji'an deliberately disrupted the ambiguous atmosphere.
Deng Yi then said something even more incomprehensible to her: "You used to be like me, standing on a boat."
How could she be like him?
Zhou Ji'an stopped responding and instead said, "I'm going to take a shower and get ready for bed."
Deng Yi gave a low "hmm".
The hot water washed away my fatigue.
Deng Yi didn't follow Zhou Ji'an into the bathroom as before. Zhou Ji'an wiped the water off his face, unsure whether he felt disappointed or sad.
If he really wanted to replicate the details of their last hotel stay together, they wouldn't even kiss tonight.
Last time, the two stayed in this room for three nights. Deng Yi did not overstep any boundaries in bed, but she was overcome with lust when she lay down and sneakily hooked his hand.
Everything went as Zhou Ji'an expected. After Deng Yi finished showering, he lay down next to her and, seeing that she was still looking at her phone, asked, "Weren't you supposed to rest?"
Zhou Ji'an turned off the screen, put down his phone, and huddled under the covers.
The bedroom light went out, leaving only a hallway lamp on, its light seeping in like mist.
Zhou Ji'an moved his stiff body, while Deng Yi on the other side was very quiet, even his breathing was silent.
Zhou Ji'an didn't want this trip to Zhoushan to have the same process and ending as the last one. She restrained her desire to hug Deng Yi and, exhausted from rushing the trip, became drowsy.
Falling asleep brings relief; at least I can stop thinking about the person next to me for a while.
The bed beside him suddenly sank a little. Zhou Ji'an, half asleep and half awake, turned his head to look at the person next to him in the dim light.
An arm slipped between her neck and the pillow, and soon another hand covered her waist. She was pulled into a hug, with almost no gap between her back and his chest.
Zhou Ji'an asked groggily, "What's wrong?"
Deng Yi rested his chin on the top of her head and said in a low voice, "I almost forgot I promised to give you a massage."
His hands started moving before he could finish speaking, gently relaxing her legs.
Zhou Ji'an involuntarily bent her legs, and he grabbed her left knee, rubbing and kneading it with his palm. After a while, his hand moved to her calf, applying pressure to her calf muscles with his fingertips.
Zhou Ji'an was already wide awake in the dim night, his eyes wide open, staring at the detached balcony outside.
She realized what was happening, pressed down on the hand that had returned to her thigh, and said urgently, "I forgot to close the curtains."
Deng Yi's breathing was heavy as he suppressed his words, "It's okay, no need to pull, I'm just giving you a massage."
Zhou Ji'an, on a whim, asked, "Why?"
The clouds were thinned by the wind, and a blurry moon was reflected on the floor of the detached balcony.
Deng Yi pushed the muscles on the front of her thigh, hesitated for a moment, and then lowered his voice to say, "Because we didn't do it last time."
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