62 Chapter Sixty-One
He coughed, hummed, grunted, and chuckled.
After Li Yingqiao finished speaking, Yu Jinyang lazily propped himself up on one arm, stretched out his other hand, tilted his head back, and slowly pushed the sugar cake into his mouth. He chewed it slowly and deliberately while staring at her without saying a word. The latter still refused to meet his gaze. Ever since the end of their handiwork that night, their eyes had never properly met again.
Looking at the calm river surface not far away, Li Yingqiao said, "Grandma Chunzhen doesn't remember me. She didn't recognize me as Li Yingqiao."
“She remembers,” Yu Jinyang also looked away, chewed two big bites of the sugar cake and swallowed it, “but you’re doing it the wrong way.”
“I even went to Putin’s shop to have him clean my teeth,” Li Yingqiao continued without turning her head. “He asked me if I had a wisdom tooth that needed to be extracted. I said, ‘Can I trust your skills now?’ He asked me to trust him, but how could I? I’m really traumatized now. I still remember the days when he left cotton balls in my gums. I would often wake up in the middle of the night and vomit blood clots. I thought I had a terminal illness. At night, I would hide under the covers and eat all sorts of snacks in a desperate way.”
He slowly swallowed the sugar cake and smiled slightly.
"After getting my teeth cleaned, I rode a shared bike around the Fengtan River. The old state-run hotel is now a bank, but the two Roman columns we used to hug when we were kids are still there. I even hugged them once. We should be able to hug them now. Oh, and the farmers' market is still there. What does that tell you? It shows that we ordinary people are the most resilient."
Yu Jinyang didn't speak, but listened quietly to her. He then took out a piece of sugar cake from the bag and silently tore it apart and ate it piece by piece.
Li Yingqiao rested her head on his shoulder, but still refused to look at him: "I passed by Tanzhong the other day, and the gate of Tanzhong is so grand now. Do you remember the day we first registered, your dad's brakes broke, and he kept circling around the school gate? Miaojia and I initially thought he couldn't find the school gate, haha. Your dad has so many shows, he might actually become a real internet celebrity... By the way, the No. 58 bus has stopped running, now everyone goes directly to the high-speed rail station, no one drives that line anymore. Meow, how come the world changes so fast?"
Yu Jinyang glanced down at the head hanging on him expressionlessly, and finally spoke: "You miss the past?"
"Of course. Why not? We used to be so close. Liang Mei and Zhu Xiaoliang are still in Fengtan, and our parents are still so young."
"Is it nostalgia for the past? Or regret? Li Yingqiao, what exactly do you want to say to me? Forget it, is that it?" He turned his head away, his shoulders stiff and tense.
He refrained from brushing her away, his voice turning cold, "Then don't lean on my shoulder."
"Stingy," she glared at him and cursed, then lifted her head a second later.
Strands of hair brushed against his eyes, carrying the strong scent of shampoo, the same fragrance as when she had moaned in his arms that night, begging him to continue.
Yu Jinyang became even colder: "Don't touch me with your arm either."
Li Yingqiao readily moved half a body length to the side.
Yu Jinyang started going on and on: "Feet."
Li Yingqiao pulled her leg back again, making sure she hadn't touched him at all.
Yu Jinyang's face tightened even more, and he turned his face away, not even letting her into his peripheral vision.
There seemed to be two lone cicadas chirping in the tree. Someone took off their hat, and their head was forcefully turned back. Amid the sparse chirping of the remaining cicadas, their shallow breaths intertwined again. They kissed each other's lips in a delicate, persistent kiss. One of them opened his eyes playfully, while the other closed them in despair and resignation. With an uncontrollable lust, he grabbed the back of her head and expertly took the initiative, kissing her more fiercely and ruthlessly than ever before, giving her almost no moment to breathe.
Until the cicadas stopped singing completely...
The two sat quietly for a while longer, without kissing or speaking, simply gazing at the river in the distance.
The moonlight bathed every corner of the small painting town in a soft, warm glow. Yu Jinyang felt that even the usually tough Li Yingqiao had been softened by the moonlight. That night, as the lanterns swayed in the living room, he had countless moments when the same thought inexplicably popped into his head: So Li Yingqiao can be this soft too.
"Are you cold?" Yu Jinyang only then noticed that she was wearing slippers, and the wind at the dock was strong.
She shook her head and said it was alright, then stood on her tiptoes to show him, skillfully moving her big toe to show him, imitating her childhood tone: "Hello, Captain Meow Meow, I am Li Yingqiao's big toe, isn't it long!" Her big toe was indeed exceptionally long, and she had been proud of it since childhood, showing it off to him countless times.
He glanced at it, then smiled and turned his head away: "Boring."
"Boring." They said almost in unison, just as she had predicted.
"It's boring without you." They said in unison again.
"snort."
"ha."
"Hey."
"Tsk."
It was a perfectly seamless duet, with the two of them casually vying for each other's lines.
After a while, he became serious again: "Actually, two years ago when I was in Beijing, I called Liang Mei and told her that I wanted to go home and that I didn't want to work hard anymore. Guess what Liang Mei said?"
"Liang Mei's only tactic against you is to provoke you. What else can she say?" Yu Jinyang actually wanted to talk to Liang Mei when he went to G Province to deliver supplies. He thought, "You can't treat Li Yingqiao the way Teacher Tan treated you."
This will only push her further and further away from us. Even Zhu Xiaoliang is very clear that Li Yingqiao will never surrender or return from Beijing unless Liang Mei's goal is achieved.
So what are Liang Mei's goals? How do you define "making it big"? How do you define "changing the world"? These are all very broad questions, and they all depend on Liang Mei's word. What are her standards?
Yu Jinyang asked her directly, and Li Yingqiao didn't say anything.
He turned his head to look at her, and his voice suddenly lowered: "You were five points short of the high school entrance exam. Liang Mei was busy dealing with Teacher Tan's funeral arrangements, and even the matter of persuading you to go to Tanzhong High School was handled by Zhu Xiaoliang. At that time, Zhu Xiaoliang and I went to discuss it with your mother, but you were absent-minded. I know you were waiting for Liang Mei's call."
He paused, his eyelids drooping beneath his hat brim. He'd said something incredibly arrogant and reckless back then: he said it was only 40,000. Later, he realized the truth of that statement. The highest total income for an underground dance troupe performing all night was a mere 2,000 US dollars per show. After deducting all the profits and expenses, he'd only get 50 US dollars a night. Even if he danced his entire month, breaking his back, he'd only earn 1,500 US dollars—a drop in the bucket for tuition, let alone living expenses.
It was then that he realized how hurtful his words were. In those years, there were many things he dared not recall. The more he recalled them, the more he felt that Li Yingqiao could never have liked him back then. The kiss at the ski resort seemed more like a prank by a teenage girl.
"Didn't Liang Mei call you?" he asked.
She remained silent, stubbornly staring at him, hoping to get some answers from him. However, judging from the way things were going tonight, Li Yingqiao intended to talk to him until dawn. Yu Jinyang glanced at his phone and asked her, "Do you have to work tomorrow? If not, let's talk another time; it's getting late."
"No, meow. I've discovered that I prefer chatting with you to kissing. It turns out you've always known and seen a lot of things. You just won't tell me, will you?"
"Haven't you always treated me as an enemy of the people?"
"Who told you to always help Liang Mei confiscate my comic books back then?"
Yu Jinyang was well aware that Li Yingqiao had never been able to see him as an independent individual. He was the son of her arch-enemy, Yu Renjie, and also the executioner who confiscated Liang Mei's comics. From a young age, she believed he was an enemy of the people, that he would betray her, that he was in league with Yu Renjie and Liang Mei. Whichever of those two displeased her, she would take it out on him first.
"All you want is for Liang Mei to admit that you're not bad, that she didn't misjudge you. You didn't get her call during the middle school entrance exam, and after the college entrance exam, you thought you'd finally get it, but Liang Mei tore up our letters, she completely broke your heart. So you kept pushing yourself to make a name for yourself in Beijing, even if you never contacted us again, you refused to come back."
Yu Jinyang lowered his voice, even though there was no one else on the dock. Both of them were wearing black baseball caps, and from behind, they looked more like two secret agents plotting a national-level assassination than exchanging pleasantries.
"Until this time, when you made a bet with Zhang Zongxie, if he hadn't tried to trick me into telling me, I would never have known that you had made such a bet. You would kiss me, but you wouldn't tell me about everything that happened to you outside, right?"
“I’m not forcing you. It’s just that sometimes I feel like you’re running away from your feelings for us. Liang Mei and I are the same; you’re afraid to admit that you really need Liang Mei’s approval. You’re also afraid to admit your feelings for me, but I can feel it, Li Yingqiao, you like me now. Otherwise, you wouldn’t have dared to look me in the eye for more than three seconds tonight, because you’ve realized that your desires and needs have been exposed to me, the person you’ve considered an enemy of the people since childhood, right?”
Li Yingqiao suddenly looked up and her eyes met his. This time, she held out for five seconds.
Yu Jinyang stared at her silently for five seconds, then she couldn't help but turn her head away. He burst out laughing: "Li Yingqiao, I tricked you out of your wits."
He was even quite at ease, a far cry from his usual aloof and cold demeanor. He tilted his head and leaned closer, his breath coming in a controlled yet undeniable murmur, and asked softly, "Shy, huh?"
Li Yingqiao let out a long sigh.
Yu Jinyang laughed so hard he took it a step further, even patting the back of her head and giving it a soothing rub: "...Oh no, I'm starting to worry that your pension might get scammed. You're getting kind of cute, Li Yingqiao."
"Stop babbling," she finally spoke, glaring at him and saying each word seriously, "I'm thinking."
He withdrew his hand, nearly bursting out laughing. Then he pretended to stand up and leave: "Okay, I'm leaving now."
"Really? Then I won't even consider whether we should start with a normal romantic relationship."
When Li Yingqiao met him face to face for the first time, she heard him stand there and mutter a curse under his breath, "Damn it." Caught off guard, she looked up at him in disbelief, unable to believe that those words could come from his mouth.
Yu Jinyang coughed, hummed, hummed, and chuckled before sitting down.
Li Yingqiao: "Come on, you have legs, don't you?"
He ignored her sarcasm, only glancing at her wryly: "So what if you take root here? If you bring it up again, I'll just pretend the Wi-Fi connected automatically."
Li Yingqiao laughed and said, "But you guessed wrong. Liang Mei didn't try to provoke me. Instead, she told me that no one can change the world; the only thing you can change is your own life."
She had never actually felt this way before. She thought she had overcome her shame after that silent experience at the elementary school New Year's Eve party. But during that phone call with Liang Mei from Beijing, Liang Mei told her: Everyone in this world is born different. Some are beautiful, some are talented, some have good parents—most are lacking in many ways. But there's one thing that everyone is born with in abundance.
It's shame. This world is a giant playground. Only by constantly exchanging your shame, by not being bound by emotions, not being assimilated by worldly norms, and not being stifled by public opinion, can you truly earn a ticket to start your life. Otherwise, why do people always seem to get what they fear most? Is God necessarily a good person? Perhaps He is a ferocious beast, and shame gives humanity all sorts of wounds. The unintentional exposure of bloodshed is what constantly attracts this beast to stir up storms in your destiny.
She had thought she would be open and honest. When she uttered those audacious words at the barbecue stand, she never considered the embarrassment she would feel after it actually happened. As her desires and needs were revealed layer by layer to Yu Jinyang, she found herself somewhat at a loss, especially given his selfless, almost pious, attitude of serving her without expecting anything in return. Her long-dormant sense of shame, satisfied only briefly in his arms, suddenly erupted—how could he be so disregardful of himself?
So she pondered for a week and found that she cared more about Yu Jinyang's feelings than she had imagined, and she tossed and turned all night.
When the two left the dock, it was already dawn, with a pale, fish-belly-like light, and they walked back.
Grandma Chunzhen got up very early and was already lying by the roadside sunbathing.
Li Yingqiao still had half a bag of leftover sweet cakes in her hand. Just as she was about to hand them over, Yu Jinyang circled around the old lady from behind, seemingly trying to scare her. She thought to herself, "This man is so childish. Does he have to tease an old lady like this?" But then she saw the man reach out and tug at the roller shutter door. The iron door rattled loudly. Li Yingqiao was about to question him about what he was doing and why he was pulling on the roller shutter door when she saw the old lady on the armchair slightly move her lips and say, "Is that Qiaoqiao?"
Li Yingqiao stood there, stunned.
...
At five in the morning, Chuanming Street, the bluestone steps, and the docks of Xiaohua City were bathed in the peaceful light of dawn. The river water was still spread out smoothly like a brand-new piece of silk. The sun, moon, and stars seemed to be irons, smoothing out all the rough edges of time.
"I told you you're doing it wrong."
"Is Grandma Chunzhen blind?"
"Yeah, but she's not hard of hearing. Sometimes when I say, 'I'm Li Yingqiao,' she'll yell at me and say, 'You're a man.'"
"You never told me before that you were secretly trying to please Grandma Chunzhen behind my back."
"OK."
"Yeah."
"Do you want to go back and clear your head?"
Good morning, going to sleep now, boyfriend.
—End of Volume Two—
[Author's Note]
Today marks the end of Volume 2. There was supposed to be another plot point that would have led to their final confirmation of their relationship.
But as I was writing this, I suddenly felt that a long talk between a young couple would be more natural and appropriate, so I revised the plot again today. I'm late!
This is Volume 3, which should be the last volume. I'll be giving out red envelopes in this chapter.
I'll be taking a two-day break. No updates on Monday and Tuesday, and updates will resume on Wednesday. Thank you everyone! [Pity][Pity][Pity][Stand-up rabbit head][Stand-up rabbit head][Stand-up rabbit head]
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