Chapter 196
For several days in a row, the sky was always gloomy, with low clouds pressing down on the glazed tile roof of the palace. Occasionally, rumbling thunder would roll across the sky, but no rain would fall. The air was filled with a suffocating, oppressive atmosphere, as if a storm was about to break.
At three-quarters past dusk, the sun was setting, and the last rays of the setting sun painted the majestic palace walls with a poignant golden-red hue. Crown Prince Xiao Qiyun did not ride in the usual royal procession, but instead arrived silently outside the Hall of Mental Cultivation in a small blue sedan chair, accompanied by two personal eunuchs.
Today, he had deliberately changed into a very plain, dark-patterned everyday robe, his hair tied up with a jade crown, and all the ornaments symbolizing his status as crown prince had been removed. After being announced, he steadily stepped into the hall.
The light inside the Hall of Mental Cultivation was dim, with only a few palace lanterns lit, and the cool scent of sandalwood slowly wafted through the air.
The emperor was bent over his desk reviewing memorials. In the candlelight, the frost on his temples seemed more pronounced than ever before, and a hint of weariness was hard to conceal between his brows.
"Your subject pays respects to Your Majesty." Xiao Qiyun knelt with his robes lifted, his voice exceptionally clear in the silent hall.
The emperor did not immediately look up. The pen tip moved across the paper, making a soft rustling sound. He simply responded with a faint "Hmm. If it is just a routine greeting, then you may leave. I have received many memorials today and am somewhat tired."
His voice carried a subtle detachment; he was not entirely unaware of the undercurrents in the court and palace recently.
Xiao Qiyun did not rise or back down. He raised his eyes, his gaze calm yet firm as he looked at his father on the throne, and spoke clearly and steadily: "Your subject has come not to pay respects. There are important matters that need to be reported to Father Emperor in person."
The emperor paused slightly, finally raising his head to look at his son's unusually solemn expression. He put down his pen, leaned back slightly, and scrutinized Xiao Qiyun's simple clothes and straight back, a growing sense of foreboding in his heart: "What is it? Speak."
The palace servants standing inside the hall had already held their breath, and even the air seemed to freeze.
Xiao Qiyun took a deep breath, met his father's scrutinizing gaze, and without the slightest hesitation, spoke the words that had swirled in his heart countless times, clearly and forcefully. His voice was not loud, but it resounded like thunder throughout the palace:
"Your subject dares to presume, after careful consideration, to know that I am of limited talent and virtue, and of lazy nature, and am unfit for the heavy responsibility of being the crown prince. I fear I will fail Your Majesty's high expectations and also harm the country and its people. Therefore, your subject humbly requests Your Majesty's permission to relinquish the position of crown prince in order to give way to the more capable."
"Clang!"
The emperor's vermilion brush slammed onto the desk with a sharp, piercing sound, splattering the thick vermilion ink across the bright yellow memorial. He abruptly rose, his face instantly flushed crimson with extreme shock and rage, his wide robes fluttering violently as he trembled. The terrifying pressure emanating from him seemed to plummet the temperature of the entire Hall of Mental Cultivation to freezing point.
"You... what did you say?!" The emperor's voice suddenly rose, filled with disbelief and impending fury, his gaze fixed on Xiao Qiyun's face like a sharp sword. "You wicked child! Say it again! The position of crown prince is the foundation of the nation, how can you treat it so lightly?! I think you've lost your mind!"
A surge of fury swept through the hall as if it were a tangible force. The chief eunuch, who was standing by, was so frightened that he fell to his knees with a thud, banging his head on the ground and trembling like a leaf. The other palace servants also prostrated themselves down, wishing they could shrink into the ground. The hall was so silent that only the emperor's heavy breathing could be heard.
Faced with the wrath of the heavens, which was enough to change the very landscape, Xiao Qiyun remained kneeling upright, like a sturdy bamboo braving the wind.
He was not intimidated by the overwhelming rage; his eyes remained clear and firm, even carrying an almost tragic calm, as he slowly, deliberately, repeated each word, his voice clearer and heavier than before:
“Your Majesty, I am perfectly clear-headed. This is not a child’s play, much less a sign of madness. Every word I have spoken comes from the bottom of my heart. The position of Crown Prince is a great honor, but also a heavy burden. My ambition does not lie here. To insist on holding this position is like walking on thin ice, filled with fear day and night. I fear that not only will I fail to glorify the imperial cause, but I will also become a burden to the nation. Therefore, I humbly request Your Majesty to allow me to relinquish this heavy burden and abdicate in favor of a more worthy successor.”
"Not here? What a fine 'not here'!" The emperor laughed in fury, his laughter filled with sarcasm and heartache. He walked around the imperial desk and stood in front of Xiao Qiyun, looking down at him intently. "Where are your ambitions? Huh?! In those mountains and rivers? You're going to abandon my expectations of you?! You...you're utterly despicable! Utterly muddleheaded!"
The emperor's rebuke was like a sudden storm, each word carrying a heavy, painful force. His finger pointing at Xiao Qiyun trembled slightly, and in his eyes, besides anger, there was a deep sense of disappointment and a pain akin to betrayal.
Xiao Qiyun raised his head, letting his father's rage pour down on him, offering neither explanation nor backing down. Just as the emperor's furious gaze collided with Xiao Qiyun's calm and resolute eyes, a strange change occurred.
The candlelight in the hall flickered slightly, and a ray of light just swept across Xiao Qiyun's upturned face, clearly outlining his deep eyes—the shape of his eyes, the unyielding stubbornness and calmness that flowed within them, his slightly pursed lips with a resolute curve… All of this was strikingly similar to the figure that was already etched deep into the Emperor's soul in his memory, that gentle yet extremely stubborn late Empress!
Once upon a time, that woman had looked at him with those same clear yet stubborn eyes, refusing to budge for a principle she considered paramount. That moment of tenderness and fierce resolve was an unforgettable, deeply etched memory he would never forget.
The raging anger melted and dissipated under the gaze of those familiar eyes and brows.
The emperor's rebuke stuck in his throat, unable to be uttered. He stared blankly at his son, as if through the thin mist of time, he saw the woman he had loved and longed for his entire life.
His heart felt as if it were being tightly gripped by an invisible hand. A wave of bitterness, helplessness, and an unyielding, profound love for his deceased wife surged through him, instantly overwhelming all his anger.
His outstretched finger, poised to punish, slowly and limply fell to the ground. His once-powerful body seemed to have all its strength drained away; he staggered back half a step and slumped heavily back into the dragon throne. The flush of rage on his face faded, replaced by a profound weariness and age, as if he had aged ten years in that instant.
A deathly silence fell over the hall, broken only by the crackling of the candlelight and the emperor's heavy, suppressed breathing.
After a long while, the emperor finally raised his eyes, his gaze complex as he looked again at Xiao Qiyun, who was still kneeling upright. His voice was hoarse and tired, with a slight, almost imperceptible tremor: "You...you really think this through? Not out of spite, or in a moment of confusion? Do you know...what it means to abdicate?"
This time, his tone was no longer reprimanding, but rather carried a deep, almost earnest certainty. He needed to know if Xiao Qiyun truly understood the price he would have to pay.
When Xiao Qiyun saw the sudden surge of tenderness and worry in his father's eyes, the kind that belonged to an ordinary father, his heart ached, and a sense of guilt entwined around him like vines.
But he knew he couldn't afford to soften his stance now. He kowtowed deeply again, his forehead touching the cold gold brick, his voice filled with utmost sincerity and clarity:
"Your subject is well aware of the gravity of this matter, and it is by no means an impulsive act, much less a rash decision. Your subject is well aware that after abdicating, the road ahead will be difficult, and wealth and glory may be as fleeting as clouds. But your subject is also well aware that if one's heart is not in this position, forcing oneself to remain will only increase suffering, which will not benefit oneself and will be more harmful to the country."
He straightened up, looking at his father with clear eyes, and began to present his case in an orderly manner, subtly weaving his personal feelings into his considerations of the nation and the world: "Your Majesty is wise. The position of Crown Prince is a matter of national importance, and only those with both virtue and talent, and a firm will, can hold it. Your son's ambition is indeed to be far away from the court. This is your son's private heart, and I dare not hide it."
He then shifted his focus to a key figure: "However, Father also knows that my second brother has been diligent and studious since childhood. His literary and military talents, as well as his practical knowledge of statecraft, are no less than mine. Moreover, he is resolute and insightful in his understanding of government affairs and people's livelihood. He also has the ambition to govern diligently and support the nation. For the sake of the country, it may be more suitable for him to inherit the throne than for someone like me who has no interest in power. He is more capable of bringing glory to our dynasty."
These words not only frankly admitted his own "selfish motives" but also invoked the Second Prince's "public righteousness," cleverly packaging his personal choice of "loving beauty more than the country" as a profound act of "choosing a worthy person for the country," thus providing the emperor, whose emotions were complicated after his rage, with a way to gracefully back down.
The emperor gazed at his son below for a long time, his eyes deep and unfathomable, as if trying to pierce through his skin and reach the depths of his soul. He was weighing his options, struggling with his decision.
As an emperor, he was well aware of the political turmoil that would result from the change of heir; as a father, he was even more heartbroken by the seemingly resolute path his son had chosen. However, Xiao Qiyun's calmness, composure, and clear understanding of the consequences made him realize that this was no trivial matter.
The sandalwood incense in the hall seemed to grow even stronger, and time flowed slowly in silence. The emperor's gaze shifted from Xiao Qiyun's face to the deep twilight outside the window, as if he saw his deceased wife's gentle yet slightly sorrowful smile in that gray sky. Throughout his life, he had been ruthless and decisive, but when it came to anything related to her, he could never harden his heart.
In the end, all his anger, disappointment, weighing of options, and resentment culminated in a long sigh, as if it had exhausted all his strength. This sigh echoed in the silent palace, filled with endless weariness and a profound sense of helplessness as a father and emperor.
He slowly closed his eyes, then opened them again, his eyes now filled with a silent, somber sadness. He waved his hand, the movement weak, his voice so low it was almost inaudible:
"That's enough...that's enough..."
After a moment's pause, as if using his last bit of strength, he finally uttered the words that would determine the future of the empire:
"Since your mind is made up and your heart is as hard as stone, there is no point in me forcing you to stay; it would only increase the rift between father and son. I grant your request."
"Your son... thanks Your Majesty for granting your wish." Xiao Qiyun kowtowed deeply again, this time his forehead lingering on the gold brick for a long time. His heart was filled with mixed emotions: the relief and lightness of having a heavy burden lifted, the uncertainty about the future, and even more so, a deep and complex guilt towards his father who had aged so much in an instant.
The emperor leaned wearily against the back of the dragon throne, as if all his energy had been drained away with that single word, "approved." He no longer looked at Xiao Qiyun, but simply waved his hand weakly, staring blankly at the coffered ceiling of the palace, his voice hoarse: "Go down... I'm tired, I want to be alone."
Xiao Qiyun rose, respectfully performed the salute, and stepped out of the Hall of Mental Cultivation. His steps remained steady, but upon closer inspection, one could discern an indescribable sense of loneliness and resolute determination in his upright posture.
As he turned around, the heavy palace doors slowly closed behind him with a dull thud, ultimately separating the complex stillness inside the palace from the deepening night outside.
The emperor sat alone in the empty hall. The last rays of the setting sun had disappeared, and the hall was completely dark. Only a few palace lanterns cast a dim yellow glow, making his lonely shadow look long.
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