"Qingrong...I..."

Before I could finish speaking, I felt a warm sensation on my lips. Song Qingrong pressed me against the door with the most forceful action, and I could feel her body trembling.

I could feel the coldness of her tears falling on me, and her faint heartbeat, which seemed to be dying.

I instinctively wanted to respond to her, but the alarm bells of that month kept ringing in my mind, as if the world was saying: Xu Ruo, you don't deserve love.

You are not worthy to be with Song Qingrong.

You will die.

You'll only hurt her by doing this!

This thought filled me with an unprecedented fear. I instinctively pushed Song Qingrong away, looked at her eyes which were now completely red, and said in a trembling voice, "I'm sorry, I..."

I hate you!

At that moment, Song Qingrong finally gave me no chance to continue speaking and left me.

Before the door closed, we looked into each other's eyes.

For the first time, I saw a coldness and unfamiliarity in those eyes that I had never seen before.

The moment the door closed completely, I felt the world become quiet, so quiet that I didn't even dare to shed a tear.

"sorry……"

I uttered those three most useless words weakly, and unsurprisingly, she didn't respond. I could only stare blankly at the door, the door that seemed to separate us into two different worlds.

I know that I have completely lost the right to hug her again, and I have also completely lost someone who loves me.

“Song Qingrong…”

"I'm fine!"

...

I don't know how I got out of the residential area. All I'm sure of is that I must have been extremely disheveled at that moment, and I even forgot what I was supposed to do next.

I've also forgotten where I'm supposed to go.

I wandered aimlessly along the roadside until I reached the place where Song Qingrong had first contacted me to borrow money.

I sat in the same spot where we used to talk all night, and suddenly I wanted to curse the unfairness of this world like Yan Yin did, and ask it why it had to treat me like this.

Why should I have to die just because I don't want to end my efforts to save Gu Nianci?

Why...

But I couldn't bring myself to yell. I could only sit there blankly, feeling my own powerlessness, while the past memories, now transformed into boning knives, cut me again and again.

I took out my phone and typed line after line, only to delete it again. I wanted to try to persuade Song Qingrong again, but I just didn't have the courage. Just as she said, what right did I have?

Why should I care about her?

Why should she listen to me?

I could only stare at the message window, hoping in my heart that she might suddenly contact me.

I don't know if it was because my expectations worked, or if the world was finally being lenient with me this time, but Song Qingrong really did send me a message.

A very, very long message.

Xu Ruo.

I originally thought we were destined to be together, otherwise why would God have made me think of you when I was in my most desperate moment, and you appeared by my side without hesitation, just like my savior.

So I've been by your side for three years, and been your friend for three years.

I long for the day when you will take the initiative to hug me.

But now I realize that all of this was just my unrealistic fantasy; there was no room for anyone else in your heart.

I shouldn't have pressured you, I shouldn't have assumed that sleeping with you would make you fall in love with me. I was so naive... I'm sorry...

From now on... I will no longer have any illusions about you, and you don't need to worry anymore.

Even if we meet again, let's act like strangers...

I love you.

I hate you too!