Chapter 31: Dusty Files, Suppressed Guilt

Su Qinghan's voice was like the thinnest and sharpest ice cone, piercing through the flickering candlelight, the silent night, and piercing into the eardrums of the dark night with incredible precision.

"My...my father's name is Su Zhenting."

Boom!

Chen Ye felt as if his soul was struck by a bolt of thunder from the sky, and it instantly shattered into pieces and turned into flying dust.

At this moment, time is infinitely stretched and distorted.

The world before him lost all color and sound. Su Qinghan's tear-stained face, those eyes filled with sadness and longing, became blurry and distant. The only thing he could "see" was the long-forgotten memory chamber deep in his mind, belonging to "Candle Shadow."

The door of the secret room burst open, and a cold, stale file opened automatically.

On the cover of the file, two eye-catching characters were written in cinnabar: "Pledge of Submission".

That was his final test to become a full-fledged assassin of the Tianji Pavilion, the cornerstone of his transformation from an unknown apprentice to the chief "Zhuying." That night's success marked the starting point of his entire assassin career, the source of all his glory and ruthlessness.

The handwriting in the file was cold and clear, and every word was like a poisoned steel needle, piercing into his memory at that moment.

[Target: Su Zhenting.]

[Position: Assistant Minister of the Ministry of Revenue.]

[Charge: Forming a clique for personal gain, embezzling disaster relief funds, and colluding with border commanders with ulterior motives. This person is a parasite of the state and a traitor to the court, and should be executed.]

[Mission level: A+.]

[Executor: Zhuying (ready).]

"A pest of the state, a traitor of the court..."

Chen Ye quickly recalled the details of the mission. The reason given by the Tianji Pavilion was so high-sounding, packaging a cold-blooded murder as a righteous judgment.

Back then, he was young, eager to prove himself, and filled with absolute obedience to the Tianji Pavilion. He never doubted the authenticity of a single word in the dossier. In his eyes, Su Zhenting was just a name, a symbol, a stepping stone to earn the codename "Zhuying."

He remembered that snowy night, which was as cold as the night he sneaked into the valley to save Su Qinghan.

He remembered that he was like a real shadow, blending silently into the heavy guards of the Su Mansion without alarming anyone.

He remembered standing on the beam of his study, like an aloof deity, looking down at the middle-aged scholar reading under the lamp. There was a lingering weariness between the man's brows, but his back was straight, like an unyielding pine tree.

He even remembered that on the page of the book the man was reading, it was written "People are the most important, the country is second, and the king is the least important."

At that time, only a trace of sarcasm flashed through his mind: a hypocrite who talks about benevolence, righteousness and morality.

Then, he moved.

The "Fleeting Light" movement technique was activated, and he landed silently behind him. The "Momentary Beauty" sword technique was launched without the slightest hesitation.

The dagger, "Momenta," pierced the target's back with pinpoint accuracy from an incredibly tricky angle. Fast, accurate, and ruthless. A single strike killed, leaving no pain behind.

It was a perfect assassination.

From infiltration to evacuation, his actions were smooth and efficient. The head of the Tianji Pavilion later described him with just two words: "Natural."

But now, the "corrupt official" whom he assassinated perfectly, the "glorious starting point" of his career, overlapped with the woman in front of him who was avenging her father with a firm look in her eyes.

On one side is the vague and stereotyped "traitor" in the files.

On the other side, there is the "father" she talks about who would lift her above his head, buy lanterns for her, and gently plead for her.

The huge sense of being torn apart was like two invisible hands, strangling Chen Ye's heart and tearing it madly to both sides.

He looked at Su Qinghan, and saw the sadness, tenacity and hatred in her eyes...it turned out that all of that was caused by him.

It was he who pushed her from the clouds into hell with his own hands.

It was he who turned her from a beloved daughter of an official into the orphan she is today, wearing a mask and full of hatred.

It was him who made her lose her home and everything. She could only search for a truth that would never come to light in the dark world like a wounded lone wolf.

And he, the culprit, accidentally saved her, took care of her, listened to her talk about her tragic past, and even... fell hopelessly in love with her.

How absurd! How ironic!

A huge, uncontrollable sense of guilt, like the most turbulent tide, instantly overwhelmed his reason.

That is not pity, nor is it sympathy.

It was a huge wave of guilt and self-loathing that came from the depths of the soul.

He felt like a shameless thief who not only stole the most important thing to her, but also stood in front of her with a sanctimonious attitude, accepting her trust and listening to her pain.

Every tear of Su Qinghan was like a hot iron, burning on his heart.

Every word she said was like a loud slap in the face.

"Sometimes, I almost forget who I am. Until... until I met you."

"Chen Ye, now you know everything."

When Su Qinghan finished saying all this and looked at him with eyes that were a mixture of sadness, trust and dependence, Shen Ye felt like he was almost unable to breathe.

The Lightless Heart Sutra within him was spinning frantically, trying to suppress the emotional storm that threatened to overwhelm him. But this time, for the first time, this icy heart method that had accompanied him for over a decade seemed so powerless.

He could feel his hands shaking uncontrollably under the table. He had to clench his fists tightly, enduring the excruciating pain of his nails piercing his palms to buy a moment of clarity and maintain the last trace of color on his face.

Tell her?

Tell her the truth?

Tell her that the murderer of your father that you have been looking for for so many years is me?

Tell her that the only warmth and light in your life comes from the devil who pushed you into the abyss?

No!

He can't!

Chen Ye knew better than anyone that hatred was the only thing keeping Su Qinghan alive. Over the years, it was the obsession of "avenging her father" that had sustained her through countless days and nights.

If he removed this pillar now, if he let her know that everything she had done, all her persistence and pain, pointed to such an absurd and cruel truth...

She would be completely devastated.

She will die.

Spiritual death is far more terrifying than physical death.

Shen Ye's mind was spinning rapidly, like a trapped beast forced into a desperate situation, frantically searching for a way out.

His reason, his instinct, his heart that had just been awakened but was already deeply trapped, were all screaming at the top of their lungs, asking him to find a reason, an excuse, a perfect lie that would allow him to continue deceiving.

Maybe... maybe it's just the same name?

Yes, that must be the case! The world is so big, and there are more than one person named Su Zhenting. Her father was the Minister of Revenue, and the man she killed... the one written in the file was also the Minister of Revenue.

This thought only lasted for a moment before he extinguished it himself.

It's such a coincidence, too coincidental to be possible.

Then... then the information from Tianji Pavilion is wrong!

This thought, like a flash of lightning that cut through the darkness, allowed him to instantly grasp a life-saving straw.

Yes, there must be something wrong with the intelligence from Tianji Pavilion!

The Tianji Pavilion always prioritized money over right and wrong. The so-called "accusations" were merely excuses given by the employer to reassure the assassin. The mastermind behind the murder, in order to cover up his crime, deliberately branded Su Zhenting a "corrupt official"!

This explanation is so "reasonable"!

It can not only explain why Su Zhenting was killed, but also remove himself from the position of "main culprit" and turn him into a... equally deceived and pitiful tool.

He is just a sword that executes orders. The one who is truly guilty is the one hiding behind the scenes and wielding the sword!

As soon as this thought arose, it was like a wildly growing vine, instantly entangling his entire mind.

He subconsciously chose this explanation which was most beneficial to himself and would cause the least harm to Su Qinghan.

He forced himself to believe this explanation.

He suppressed the most terrifying and true thought - "I killed an honest official and a good father with my own hands" - and covered it with a thick layer of soil with this newly woven, seemingly perfect logic, and then used all his strength to stomp it down.

He missed it.

I missed the first and only chance to confess everything to her.

From that moment on, the door to the truth was closed by his own hands. The lock of lies was locked by his own hands.

When Chen Ye raised his head again and met Su Qinghan's eyes filled with anxiety, the turbulent waves in his heart had been forcibly calmed. What remained was only a dead silence and bottomless darkness.

His face was paler than ever, but in the dim candlelight, it only looked like exhaustion.

His eyes were as deep as an ancient well, able to swallow up all the probing light without revealing a single trace of true emotion.

He looked at her, the woman he swore to protect with his life.

After a long time, he finally spoke.

His voice, from the extreme suppression, was hoarse and heavy, a tone he himself hadn't noticed. It was as if every word was squeezed out from the depths of his soul with all his might.

"Your revenge,"

He paused, as if making the most sacred and heavy oath.

"I'll help you register."