Chapter 6

Stars, ribbons, and disco balls.

The whole world was dressed up in Christmas style. Our family doesn't celebrate Western holidays. My parents don't understand, and my brother and I are too lazy to do it.

It was Friday after school, and some classmates suggested we go out for Christmas, have a meal at a restaurant, and then go to karaoke.

Who wouldn't be tempted to play? Especially since it's been half a month since the last holiday, and the school always finds various excuses to keep us here.

"Su Yu, you go ahead? Don't pretend with me!" The loudest guy grabbed my neck with his arm, warning me not to be fake. Fine, I like to have fun too.

With this commotion, no one could concentrate on class anymore. Several students with cell phones started taking out their phones to find a place to sit, and the girls were whispering to each other about what clothes to wear and what makeup to put on.

Twenty minutes... ten minutes... five minutes...

"get out of class dismissed."

The teacher didn't even leave the classroom; he just turned around, and the class erupted again. Amidst the huge commotion, I could vaguely see someone pacing back and forth at the door.

I rubbed my eyes and saw Su Yu cautiously peek in, her fingers curling as she knocked on the door.

The two people sitting by the door were fast asleep. I sprang up from the bench and rushed over.

"Are you looking for me?" I tripped over the edge of the podium and almost bowed deeply to my brother, who helped me up.

"Are you going out for Christmas? I saw that some people in my class are organizing it, but I don't feel like I'm that close to them."

"Then, then, would you like to come to our class?"

Su Yu frowned, "Am I that familiar with the people in your class?"

He turned and left, so resolutely.

"Sigh..." Qiu Jiajia patted my shoulder from behind, her tone implying that I was hopeless and couldn't be helped.

When Friday came, my brother got his phone back from home and went out with his friends again.

He was wearing a black down jacket that reached his ankles. When he left, his mother forcefully pulled the hood up over his head and zipped the jacket all the way up.

Like a penguin.

The penguin went out, and I left a little while later. My mom looked me up and down, noting that I was wearing a hoodie with a down jacket and loose, breathable jeans.

After thinking it over and over, she rummaged through her drawers and pulled out a black and white checkered scarf from somewhere, wrapping me up from neck to head like a rice ball.

Rice Ball went out.

I figured my brother probably took the subway, but there are only a few shopping malls and pedestrian streets around here, so the chances of running into him are very high.

Ke Wen was no different from a pig; he served more than a dozen plates of meat and then had a bunch of seafood cooked in the hot pot.

I took off my gear and put it aside, then started grilling meat for them. I've never grilled meat for my brother before. In a daze, that thought popped into my head, and I felt like there was something wrong with me.

There were five guys at the table, and they were truly stuffed, eating and drinking to their hearts' content. The waiter came to clear the table several times, and each time the table was overflowing. I thought back to the time Su Yu took me to eat barbecue, and now that I think about it, I always feel like I didn't get to enjoy myself enough back then.

Suddenly, I felt a little down and inexplicably had the thought that "Su Yu and I don't seem to be that close."

Maybe I was just delirious from the heat, or maybe it's because he's no longer the only person in my world, and I've been spending more time with my friends? A few more people started clamoring to drink, and soon the table was overflowing with beer bottles.

I also drank three big bottles, it was so refreshing... I didn't know anything about what I drank and I can't remember anything.

Through the sizzling, oily chimney, I gazed with hazy eyes at the group of faces opposite me that seemed to resemble mine. I was about to spend the most important three years of my life with them.

The smoke tore their faces apart and then reformed them, and the sounds of their voices were incessant. I sat quietly in a corner of the sofa, my hand casually in my hoodie pocket, as if there was something there.

I tried to feel it, but couldn't find it.

He pulled it out and found a note with neat handwriting; it was easy to tell who wrote it.

If I, Su Yu, smoke again, I'll make Su Yu wash my socks for a year!

It was kind of funny, and I couldn't help but chuckle.

"Drink up, damn it, are you waiting to be an adult, bro?" A huge glass of wine appeared in front of me like a funny face-to-face picture that I used to post on social media when I was a kid.

I crumpled up the note, stuffed it into my pocket, and gulped down the rest of the drink.

We walked to the karaoke bar. Some of the girls said they wanted to browse a cosmetics store, so the rest of us guys just wandered around outside.

Want one?

They said they were asking, but they had already ordered and stuffed it into my mouth.

"Awesome."

I casually held a cigarette between my fingers and leaned against the wall.

My phone rang, and I thought it was my dad asking me to bring some wine, but when I opened it, I saw it was Su Yu.

What time do you get home?

:have no idea

:?

It's past ten o'clock, what's wrong?

Don't stay out too late.

I didn't reply, and then I remembered that my brother was a few years older than me.

"Hey handsome, wanna add me on WeChat?"

Before the phone screen went out, a voice I couldn't tell was male or female, drifted into my ear.

I looked up and froze on the spot. Wasn't that Su Yu?

People around me started teasing me, saying I'm bisexual.

Upon closer inspection, something's not right. This isn't Su Yu, but why does she look so much like my brother?

I held out the QR code, and the boy, with his left hand raised and his right hand scanning it, sent a friend request right in front of me, his fox-like eyes staring straight at me as if he wanted to devour me.

Only after seeing that it had been approved did he turn around and leave.

Just as the girls finished shopping, we chatted and laughed all the way to the karaoke bar.

It wasn't until that moment that I realized why that boy had come to find me. None of us in this large group had the demeanor of a "high school student."

I booked a medium-sized private room. I can't sing, but I was happy to listen to them sing.

At first they were a bit hesitant, but then they got carried away and a bunch of people started singing DJ songs and corny tunes, practically ready to tear the roof off.

I went out to relieve myself, and as I had imagined, I ran into my brother. I wondered what he was doing and whether he was having fun.

I didn't go back. I sat on the sofa in the living room to calm my still-buzzing mind.

I opened the WeChat app and saw a message. Upon closer inspection, it was from that boy.

Call me Little Star

What does this mean? And a stage name?

I scratched my head and racked my brains for a long time before coming up with a nickname for myself.

:That

Then call me

…

Call me Cowen

Yes, thank you, Cowen.

I clicked on Xiaoxing's profile picture and, as usual, looked at his Moments. It was simple, and also... very nice.

He must be the person with the most photos in the world.

I confess that when I looked at his photo, I inadvertently compared it to my brother's face.

It was a very different kind of... I felt I needed to think of a suitable and appropriate word, but the only word that came to mind was "allure".

Those eyes are so much like my brother's, but the difference is that my brother's eyes don't have as much lust, while this Xiaoxing seems to have a hook in every photo.

The more I watched, the more addicted I became. I was captivated by the incredible versatility of this guy. He wasn't limited to just the most basic tops and bottoms when it came to clothing, and he could be so poised and confident in photos. He could make the perfect expression in every single frame.

They can be quirky, cute, or playful.

It wasn't until later that I realized that my so-called infatuation with Xiaoxing was a reflection of another kind of feeling I had for my brother.

I asked him if he could teach me how to dress and take photos.

He sent a voice message; his clear voice flowed into my mind like a stream, or like the sunshine in a heavy snow.

Of course, darling! You're such a great catch, we can't let this opportunity go to waste!

The rising intonation made my heart flutter. Can boys be addressed like that?

Then I thought of the nicknames I used with the boys in class... they were so offensive.

Back in the private room, the girls had already left, leaving the group of men sprawled haphazardly on the sofa. I couldn't tell them apart from the hazardous waste.

I took a picture and messaged Cowen to say that I was going back too.

Walking towards the subway entrance, I saw the strong Christmas atmosphere on the street. People were hugging and kissing under the five-pointed star, and children were chasing and playing with each other.

I'm not very educated, but I think if it were my brother, he could describe this scene in more beautiful and vivid language.

I hope Xiaoxing will like it here too? I'll take a picture and send it to him, saying, "Are you going to take a bunch of pictures again tonight?"

He didn't reply to me.

When I picked up my phone again, it was my brother calling. He questioned me about why I hadn't come home yet and whether I was going to spend Christmas in America.

I told him I was on my way to the subway before he hung up.

I can't. Su Yu and I are not related by blood.

We hadn't seen each other all afternoon, but we bumped into each other in the subway car.

I was scrolling through Xiaoxing's WeChat Moments with my head down when a pair of familiar shoes appeared in front of me. I looked up and there was my brother standing in front of me, leaning against the railing looking at his phone.

"elder brother?"

Su Yu merely raised her eyelids slightly, and upon seeing it was me, she immediately became serious, looking as if she was about to lecture me.

I immediately stood up and let my brother sit down.

My brother plopped down on the floor.

We didn't say a word to each other until we got off the subway.

"You're so good at drinking!" My brother punched me, hitting right on the bone in my shoulder, which hurt again.

Su Yu grabbed my clothes and sniffed them hard, then slapped me again, grabbing my collar and hitting my back with his other hand.

"Still smoking! Still smoking!"

If your lungs get damaged during a zombie outbreak, people will dig them out and throw them into the "hazardous waste" bin.

The bright moon hung in the sky, and we played around all the way home—or rather, my brother hit me.

The two elderly people had already gone to bed. Su wanted to supervise my shower, so she sat in the living room with her legs crossed and kept track of the time. She didn't let me out until half an hour had passed.

I told him I'd time you too, and he told me to get lost.

There were still some face masks he had applied on the coffee table. I took a little out of the bag; they were wet and sticky, which felt uncomfortable, so I wiped them on my face.

Why does it feel like the more I wipe, the more there is?

"Su Yu! Bring me my pajamas!"

This little male tiger is indeed worthy of being the mother tiger's offspring; their voices are exactly the same.

He stretched out a slender arm, snow-white with pink fingertips, slightly wrinkled from being washed by the water.

Sensing my approach, those arms gave me a hard thud.

Not only is it slender, but it is also very powerful.

"The Arabs have come to our house?"

When my dad got up in the middle of the night, he saw my older brother with his hair wrapped up, and he squinted his eyes, which looked like slits, and gave a warm comment.

The "Arab" rubbed his headscarf, drank a glass of water, and went back to his room.

The door wasn't closed, and Su Yu was lying on the bed, reading a book with her legs crossed.

I'm serious, those legs...

What would it feel like if my brother wore Xiaoxing's clothes...?