Chapter 103 Irresponsible Extra 3

Irresponsible Extra: When Kanako Travels Back to the Gintama Theater (Part 2)

"Is this something you two can call me?"

"She is my aunt."

As soon as Shenwei said this, everyone in the audience was shocked.

[Okay, okay, I know she is your aunt. Blame me for being tongue-tied, okay...] This is Afu Rabbit, who has tolerated Shenwei for many years and is not afraid of this blow today.

Afuto: [But then again...why am I so good at taking the blame? (Sad)]

Kagura narrowed her large, bright blue eyes into dead fish eyes and picked her nose, thinking: [Stupid brother is starting to show off his possessiveness like the male protagonist in the [beep——] anime.]

Kagura: [Give up! My aunt won't fall for your tricks... She belongs to everyone, especially my Aru! ! !]

Xinghaifangzu: [Who am I? Where am I? Why do I seem so out of place in this family? It must be an illusion!]

Before he could finish his rant, Xinghaifangzu's second thought immediately popped up: [Wow wow wow… That brat Kamui has actually learned to respect his elders (even though those elders aren't him). Papa, I'm so touched…]

Kanako: [……] (There’s no doubt that Kanako really isn’t thinking about anything. Her mind is often actively kept blank while she’s enjoying the show.)

Shimura Shinpachi/System: [I really want to complain... I really do.]

As everyone was brainstorming, Shenwei spoke up, somewhat annoyed, "Are we playing "status"? No one's paying attention to me for a full ten seconds."

"If no one says anything, let the bald man's hairline move back another three centimeters next year." Shenwei whispered devilishly.

It appeared! A curse of extremely strong nature!

Xinghaifangzu: “???” It seems that he is always the one who gets hurt.

Kanako: […! 】

"So you are Little Kamui!" Kanako pointed at him and almost shouted out the second half of the sentence, "nephew", but fortunately she stopped herself in time.

The child is grown up, and you can't easily use seniority to pressure others... Seniority is used to make it easier for her to express her love.

"Hi, it's me."

Facing a face that was 80% similar to his deceased mother's in his memory, Shenwei felt a little dazed for a moment.

Although this was the first time they met, this face and the connection that flowed through their blood...for the first time, Shenwei couldn't treat her the same way he usually treated women.

How to say it... Shenwei even felt that no matter what kind of bad temper she had, it didn't matter. Just based on this face, she was a get-out-of-jail-free card for him, as long as it didn't involve any bottom line issues.

Afterwards, Kanako thought about it carefully, and no one knew what she imagined. She could only see the ahoge on her head turning clockwise.

The orange hair on Shenwei's head also seemed to rotate counterclockwise twice.

"I've decided. The plan to beat my nephew is over. Today I'm going to be here to clean up the mess for the God family that passed on the recessive baldness gene!" She made up her mind.

Shenwei was unexpectedly ecstatic, his smile even brighter and more sunny: "Okay, Auntie!!"

Afu Rabbit, who was eating melons nearby, was shocked: "Wait, what did you guys just use to communicate?!"

Xinghai Fangzhu seemed to have gone back to more than ten years ago overnight. He subconsciously explained: "...Hashi, Hashidou Sack!"

"Stop, Aru!" Kagura stood in the middle and used her body to stop the two groups of people who were ready to move. This scene seemed familiar.

"Auntie, idiot brother, and bald daddy, stop fighting." Kagura's eyes were firm, "If you want to fight, go to the dance studio! You can't kill Yato's Aru by fighting like this!"

The system screamed: "Why does it have to progress towards killing my family members?!"

"And I can't win the event, so I can't get the autographed photo of teacher iivv that I want most..." Kagura said with a pout, lowering her head.

There was silence in the air for a few seconds.

After a moment, the first one to withdraw his hands was Shenwei. He patted his cloak and turned to leave: "We will meet again later."

He turned around, and after blocking his view from his bald father, he seemed to be in a good mood: "When that time comes, you must be in excellent condition to fight me, Aunt Kanako."

Kanako tilted her head, puzzled, "I'm in a good state right now, huh?"

Shenwei replied: "It's not a good state to be dragged down by the weak at any time."

Afu Rabbit quickly put down the melon seeds, coughed twice, and acted as a personal translator: "Ah, anyway, it's just as you see it... We have a mission to complete on Earth, so goodbye first."

Seeing Kamui walking quickly ahead, Afu Rabbit took the opportunity to get closer and whispered, "This kid is just a total tsundere when it comes to getting along with his family, you know that, so..."

"Afu Rabbit, I can hear you. ^_^"

“…Here it comes!”

A sudden storm has come to an end for the time being.

Against the backdrop of the old father reluctantly extending his hand to Erkang, Kanako and Kagura returned to the event site holding hands.

The clasped hands swung in the air. As soon as he entered the room, he saw Sakata Gintoki rushing over with his pupils trembling.

"Kagura-chan!!" His voice was hoarse. "Well, since you love Jujutsu Zero Wars so much, you must have hidden a lot of merchandise, right?"

Kagura was confused for a moment: "Xiaoyin, what's wrong with you?"

Following the direction pointed by Sakata Gintoki, everyone saw a new notice posted on the bulletin board.

[Due to the large number of participants, we need to conduct a screening process before the event begins. Please forgive us. QAQ]

[Filter criteria are as follows: "Those of you who love Jujutsu Zero Wars must have kept proof of your love."]

[Please provide at least five "proofs of love" (can be peripherals) to register for the event! (The organizer will give you a heart)]

After seeing this request, Sakata Gintoki, who had taken advantage of the situation, immediately threw salt on the spot: "How come in this world, even fan membership needs to be reviewed and verified by others?"

He was extremely sad: "You guys, stop associating the purchase of peripherals with your love for the work all the time!!"

"In my generation, Gintoki, people who liked someone would hide it secretly under the covers or under their butts, because the original name of the manga "Gin 0" would make people think of 00. An elementary school student even left a message in the comment section, saying that if he accidentally blurted out the name when he got home one day, his parents would pull his ears and scold him!" Sakata Gintoki continued to add insult to injury.

"No matter how you think about it, it can only be Sorachi's fault!" shouted the glasses frame that floated back.

Sakata Gintoki was stunned when he saw the combination of a ghost and a glasses frame: "Hachi, what's wrong with you, Hachi!?"

Shimura Shinpachi burst into tears: "I don't know what happened, my body can't go back!"

Sakata Gintoki frowned: "Hahaki - our luck has been ridiculously bad these past two days -"

Shimura Shinpachi: "Gin—me too—where did the salt bag come from!?"

"Speaking of peripherals, I did bring an Aru." Kagura slowly pulled out a capsule from his pocket and unscrewed it. "This is the upper body model of the one-eyed cat of teacher iivv."

The front desk clerk took a quick look and said, "Sorry, we want 'proof of love', not 'proof of hate'."

Kagura puffed up her cheeks in dissatisfaction, then turned around and said like a kindergarten kid complaining, "Auntie, someone here is questioning my 'love'!"

Kanako took a step forward, opened her big red eyes, and began to speak: "As the saying goes, the deeper the love, the deeper the hatred..."

Halfway through, the front desk clerk was genuinely moved. Another staff member from the organizer interrupted, saying, "If your 'deep love and intense hatred' also meets the criteria, then what about these people next to you?"

Everyone's eyes moved to the side.

I saw a giant one-eyed cat drawn on a signature wall, split into two halves, since someone had not yet done so.

Don't forget to mark on the wall: [Please cut in half along the dotted line.]

An energetic student mustered up the courage and rushed forward with a black marker in hand: "Ah—"

And draw a straight horizontal line at the waist.

The audience on both sides applauded enthusiastically and praised the performance.

Even Shinpachi Shimura couldn't help but sigh: "It really attracted a lot of hatred from the fan community, iivv."

The next person to come on stage was a corporate slave with thick black eyeshadow on. He used his tie as a sword, ran forward in one swift step, and raised his arm: "Ah!——"

A crooked horizontal line was drawn across the one-eyed cat and the picture next door labeled "Asshole Boss."

“I hate working!!!” the office worker roared.

"Good! Very impressive!!" The applause from the audience on both sides became louder and louder, and the atmosphere was instantly ignited.

"..." Shimura Shinpachi was speechless for a moment, "This isn't a question of love or hatred, it's purely a venting session!"

The third person to come on stage was a ninja girl with long purple hair and glasses wearing a black tight leather jacket.

She took out a bundle of red long whips and swung them out neatly... After twists and turns, they finally hit her lower back!

And made a soul-stirring voice-over that couldn't pass the review.

Very good, the strength control is very precise! The judges below have started to give scores. How many points can they give? Let us wait and see——

"Go back to the drawing board, you useless narrator!!" Sakata Gintoki used a flying kick on an unknown person who was completely covered in mosaics.

"Ahhhhhh, that's right! It's that expression and that action. Please use your venting pla on me as much as you can, Gin! Don't go easy on me because of your public embarrassment..."

The ninja girl with glasses, Sarutobi Ayame, was dragged away.

Sakata Gintoki said nothing, rolled his eyes and slightly opened his lips, as if one could see a soul coming out of his mouth, and he had lost hope in life.

System: "This is simply a riot of demons...!"

"That's right," the organizer sighed wearily. "So, I'm sorry, your application has been rejected."

There are still two hours before the event officially starts.

Current number of "Proof of Love": (0/5)

"Yo, Dana."

A familiar voice came from behind, and Kagura frowned subconsciously, retreated behind Kanako, and looked at the person with contempt.

Okita Sougo glanced in Kanako's direction and continued calmly, "It seems you're worried about the selection criteria, and so am I. Do you want to cooperate?"

Sakata Gintoki finally came to his senses: "...Can this selection be done by piecing together?"

"The number of places is limited. Each group of accomplices can only send one person as a representative to participate in the competition. It shouldn't be difficult for us to squeeze out five peripheral products." said Okita Sougo.

"You are also coveting my personally signed Aru!" Kagura cursed.

"Yoshi, then to show my sincerity, I'll play the first one first." Okita Sougo changed the subject.

He squatted down in casual clothes and took out a pug model wearing a Konoha Village ninja forehead protector from his wide sleeves.

The dog's face was repainted and replaced with a deputy director who is suspected to be fond of smoking and mayonnaise.

Okita Sougo patted the reviewer's shoulder and said, "Alright, let's begin the appraisal."

"...What the hell is this?" The reviewer looked confused.

Seeing that the trick wasn't enough, the system anxiously nudged Kanako, wanting to hear her opinion.

Unexpectedly, Kanako was still immersed in what had just happened: "Actually, the ninja just now could have used a different whip material. The sound would have been better."

System: "Don't worry about your Aisi Aimu!!"

Kanako regained her composure and refocused her gaze on the ground.

The moment she saw the model, a light flashed from behind her head, and she immediately started talking nonsense mode: "The one in front of you is one of Kakashi's summoning beasts, the famous dog Jushiro. Who is Kakashi? Don't you know Kakashi? He's the silver-haired one with the eyepatch."

"Ah, speaking of the eye patch and the silver hair, they're both teacher's settings. Hatake Kazeroshi is rounded off to Gojo Satoru, so it's logical and reasonable, and it's a testament to Jujutsu Zero Wars' love, isn't it?"

Kanako: "Because where leaves are flying, there is fire burning! Silver-white hair is a kind of inheritance of shonen manga!!"

The front desk staff was stunned when they heard this. After urgently calling an emergency meeting to discuss it, it was passed unanimously without any suspense.

Current proof of love: (1/5)

Turning back, Kanako calmly pulled everyone to a corner.

"We can't make the peripherals on the spot, so we can only use Copla." Kanako stared at Sakata Gintoki and patted his shoulder, "Mommy, it's all up to you!"

Sakata Gintoki was furious: "What's with that expression on your face? It's like you want me to die bravely! No... why am I the mommy? I'm obviously a boy, I don't want to be a boy's mother!!"

Okita Sougo nodded, his head in his pockets: "In order to achieve the great cause, I can only sacrifice my body."

Kagura: "Maybe all the silver-haired uncles in Jump are played by Gin as Aru!"

"Reorganize my words for me!!"

Five minutes later, Sakata Gintoki appeared with a black garbage bag wrapped around his eyes, his hair filled with hair smoothing liquid, and two fingers pinched together: "Infinite Zero Place."

The auditor who was drinking water spit it out on the spot.

Current proof of love: (2/5)

The next second, Sakata Gintoki put the black garbage bag to his mouth with despair, and sang loudly in a rough voice: "Oh, wash the kelp~ wash the kelp~"

He covered one eye in agony and said, "It's not me who's wrong...it's this world of Jujutsu Zero War!"

The reviewer spat out a mouthful of blood and gave a trembling thumbs-up.

Proof of Love: (3/5)

"Xiaojie—" Sakata Gintoki tore off the black garbage bag and shouted at the top of his lungs, "He is my most important friend!"

This Xiaojie is not that Xiaojie, but it’s not a big problem.

The reviewer was so moved that he burst into tears: "Wow... Why hasn't Mr. Togashi updated yet..."

"It's the last one, what's the last one left to perform...?" the system asked hurriedly.

"You don't have to act anything." Kanako said, "Gin, just act like he's standing there."

Current proof of love: (5/5)

Five wishes, fulfilled at once, Sakata Gintoki's one-shot success.

He was so tired that he felt dizzy and collapsed to the ground.

Kagura got the participation quota, and then under Kanako's guidance and training, she quickly began to prepare for the event competition.

In a blink of an eye, it was time for the competition, which was, as expected, a trivia quiz related to the comics.

Kagura overcame all obstacles and scored the highest score on the last question of the audition, "What color underwear is Gojo Satoru wearing?"

By the way, after a heated discussion, the top few answers given by the audience were blue pants, star pants, green plaid pants, etc.

Sakata Gintoki, who was sitting in the front row, stroked his face and said, "Why do these types of underwear sound a little familiar..."

System: "Are you too lazy to question why such shameless questions are asked? Ahem! I'm choking on my saliva..."

A celestial being with pink tentacles sprouting from a nearby seat suddenly chimed in, "Sounds familiar, doesn't it? It brings me back to those days, all those years ago, when I was following the universe's barrage of comments and watching Katekyo Shōroku."

"In the daily arc, the protagonist Tsuna's shirt explodes almost every episode, and the eager commentators surge before the death bullet pierces their foreheads—buy it, buy it, what color is Tsuna's underwear today...?"

"I guess this question is based on the plot of 'Katekyo Hitman Zero'." said the pink-tentacle angel.

And Kagura's highest-scoring answer was—

"He's not wearing any underwear, huh? He's a naked guy!!"

Sakata Gintoki: “…”

Shimura Shinpachi: “…”

The whole audience was in an uproar.

The pink-tentacle angel said seriously, "That's a very innovative answer, quite unconventional. Kagura's points have already reached the same level as the first place. And the other contestant she's competing with is my right-hand man. Don't underestimate us."

After that, the pink-tentacle celestial being politely introduced himself: "I'm a visitor from Tucao Planet. You can call me by my real name, Prince Salt."

The Prince with Fallen Eyes tore open his thick coat and immediately took out more than a dozen packets of salt of different shapes and sizes.

Sakata Gintoki grabbed the pink tentacle.

"Huh?"

He lashed out frantically, "So you were the one who inserted the salt packet into the meme earlier? Do you know how long I, Yin, have been waiting and searching for this meme that has no coherence? Huh?"

"Let go of our invincibly handsome and charming prince!!" In the field, Kagura's biggest rival was spinning clockwise with blue tentacles on his head.

Immediately, Kanako smelled a strange yet familiar scent.

The system also discovered something was wrong. It used the background space that stored a lot of knowledge and experience to strictly compare one by one, and finally used high technology to come up with a feature refined from a noun: the spirit of words.

Kanako slowly typed:?

When did the word spirit thing get into the Gin-O Theater? …Okay, it's not impossible, but isn't that a property that only appears frequently in fantasy Shonen Jump works?

On the competition stage, Kagura made a disgusted expression: "How on earth is a pink tentacle 'invincibly handsome and charming'?"

In an instant, a “+6” popped up above Kagura’s head.

This score is not a game point, but appears suddenly like smoke and then gradually dissipates into the air.

Kanako looked towards the rest of the group and discovered that those who kept silent would basically not receive any extra points, while the ghost glasses frames floating in the air would occasionally pop up words like "+4" and "+8".

The most outrageous one was Gintoki Sakata. After two days of experience, he had enough of the farce, so he grabbed the tentacles of the Salt Prince and opened his mouth to attack.

“+21”, “+36” and so on kept popping up above my head.

Okita Sougo, who couldn't see the numbers, was talking to Kanako: "Chai Na Mei Plu, did you notice anything strange?"

Kanako used her habitual sweeping kick, and Okita Sougo had no time to react. His legs were suspended in the air and his forehead hit the floor.

"Oh, sorry, it's a conditioned reflex..." In fact, she has restrained herself a lot. In the past, she would have kicked him in the crotch.

Kanako apologized sincerely: "What did you want to ask?"

Okita Sougo covered his bleeding forehead and looked at the people on both sides: "You really haven't watched the news."

"Um?"

"Turn back two frames on the news channel. Prince Hoshi's personal interview is full of issues." Okita Sougo rested his hand on his scabbard. "In the entire interstellar space, apart from Prince Baka, whose brain was blown apart by the consulate explosion, which celestial being would be so friendly to Earth?"

A “+2” appeared above Okita Sougo’s head.

"So whether it's the hideously ugly Prince Salt Throwing or the ordinary Tucao Star Tourist, they've all been monitored and treated by us to varying degrees, overtly or covertly."

“…even the spring rains have arrived.”

No, actually, Chun Yu only has Kamui’s family problems.

Kanako instinctively opened her mouth, but was interrupted by Okita Sougo in time: "Be careful of the 'trouble comes from the mouth', and tear down that aunt."

Accidents always come unexpectedly. Seeing that Kagura's score was catching up, the blue tentacles on the competition stage... they were broken!

It burst into tears and fell to the ground, feeling as sad as a child. "Your Highness, the Prince of Smudged Eyes... Your subordinate, I can't take first place!"

"The opponent is so disgusting! Yesterday, I hacked into the competition question bank and changed it to all difficult and weird questions about the two-faced Sukuna and special-grade cursed spirit factions. She answered them so easily... She is the real solo pusher of teacher iivv!"

"Although Iivv-sensei's autographed photo could definitely be transformed into a great launching device, used to gather the entire interstellar energy and resentment towards Jujutsu Zero Wars..."

"Although our plan is flawless, the Earthlings can't even see our hidden 'complaint bonus'..."

"They wouldn't have guessed that every complaint they uttered would invisibly add a bit of power to our Dragon Vein Excavator and Earth Destroyer... But all of that is gone now!"

Blue Tentacles: "If I had known it would turn out like this, I wouldn't have joined the plan to seize the energy of the Earth's dragon veins!"

"Mommy, I want to complain back to Tucao Xing QAQ!!"

Before he finished speaking, the entire competition stage and the audience seats fell silent.

Sakata Gintoki, who was still holding on to the pink tentacles, shook his hands off in horror, as if he had touched something dirty. He took several steps back and bumped into the glasses frame ghost.

Okita Sougo silently fiddled with his phone.

Kanako folded her arms and took out the popcorn she had treasured for a long time: "I have never seen such a powerful suicide truck."

“+18”.

On the other side, the thrown-away Salt Prince stood up with one hand, and staggered to the center of the competition arena... He was kicked over by the little Earth Guardian Kagura... He staggered to his feet again with difficulty, and the scars on his body only got worse.

In the end, even Kagura couldn't bear to watch it anymore, so she gave him a hand and said earnestly: "It's still too difficult to play the villain role, Aru. Don't be nervous, everyone will cooperate with your performance."

So when the Shinsengumi rushed in fully equipped, this was the scene they saw.

Surrounded by the crowd, Prince Smashing Salt took three deep breaths, trying to sound more fierce. "Those self-explosions just now!...Actually, they were all planned in advance!"

People's faces were filled with pity: "Yes, you are right."

"Because... because if you voluntarily reveal your plan, you can get a substantial bonus - this is a constraint, yes, it is part of the constraint!" Prince Salt roared.

A child's voice rang out from the audience: "Mom, didn't you say that when people grow up they won't be obsessed with fake comics anymore? Look at this, what is it?"

system:"……"

That’s enough, stop talking. Can’t you see that Prince Salt’s tentacles are almost broken with grief?

Hijikata Jushiro: “…”

After all this time, these are the people who want to invade the earth?

Sakata Gintoki also has something to say:

After all this time, it's this kind of person who makes him wary of "disaster from the mouth"?

Sakata Gintoki: "Well, forget it... At least it's a happy ending with no losses. At least there won't be any more weird people interfering--"

In the blink of an eye, a sudden and inexplicable gale swept across the land from bottom to top.

Soon, the entire competition stage and the audience seats were shrouded in shadows. When people looked up, they hurriedly fled to places where there were no shadows, as if they had seen a ghost.

A spaceship dropped from the sky with a crash-like force. The hatch opened, and a man with an afro and black sunglasses shouted energetically, "Long time no see, Earth! We're here to save you! Ahahahaha, ahahahaha."

"--Bar."

Even more bizarre stuff has appeared!!

"Eh? Where's the invader?" Sakamoto Tatsuma looked around.

"It might have been crushed by the spaceship," said Mutsu.

"Dad!" Kanako's eyes lit up and she rushed forward without hesitation.

Sakata Gintoki couldn't believe it: "Why am I the mommy and that guy is the daddy? No, I absolutely don't want to be the only male mom!"

Then Kanako passed Sakamoto Tatsuma and threw herself into Mutsu's arms.

Mutsu smoothed his hair expertly: "You...did you take growth hormone?"

"Don't worry about these details!" Kanako said.

Sakata Gintoki: “…” He’s a girl’s dad!!

Also, are the issues of generation and age in your Yato family becoming increasingly confusing?

…

Kagura finally won and got the autographed photo of iivv that she had been longing for (although the photo was still of a one-eyed cat), the Shinsengumi captured the salt-throwing prince of the Rant Star and his subordinates, and the passing Rescue Team helped clean up the alien equipment that was smuggled into the earth. All three parties made a lot of money.

"So when the Tucao aliens secretly took away the dragon vein energy, they triggered the chaos of time and space, and called us back to this world - is that right?" After reviewing the situation again, the system finally came up with a logical explanation.

Kanako looked at the setting sun in the distance and shook her head. "It would be more appropriate to explain it as 'alarm'."

"The dragon vein realized its situation was dire, so it called upon me, a child born from it, to help and protect it... Little did it know that in today's world, many different types of people already viewed the Earth as a treasure."

"Everyone is protecting this place in their own way... the place where I was born." Kanako felt the scene in her vision slowly being stained by the setting sun, and seemed to have a feeling, "This is a very perfect result."

"From now on, I won't have to worry about the safety of my hometown, and I can easily reminisce—"

"Don't worry, you mean you don't plan on coming back?"

Shenwei's umbrella and clothes were stained to varying degrees. He licked the blood at the corner of his mouth, and his blue eyes flashed with suppressed emotions.

"Just wait and see..."

He said.

"Until I am strong enough to defeat you, the Altana (dragon vein) of this planet will never be weakened."

"Don't let me see you looking weak... well, otherwise I will definitely kill you first, Kanako."

Hearing that Kamui didn't call her "Auntie", Kanako turned around and looked at him calmly. She had reason to believe that that impure look contained a considerable amount of longing.

That was a childhood Kanako had never experienced, with a father who never came home, a baby sister, and a mother who was dying.

As their eyes met, Kanako heard him say, "Just watch!"

【Author’s words】

I don't know why it was written like this...

I have this inexplicable feeling. As an Altana individual who also lives forever on a planet, my aunt, who resembles my mother, is now healthy, beautiful, and powerful. I subconsciously want to keep her in some form to make up for the regret of longing for her but not being able to see her (though it feels a bit like a meal replacement, which makes it even more pitiful, so I cherish what I have now, even if it's in an awkward way).

Commonly known as everyone in the daily mode do not tell Kamui! (buhi)

After reviewing and feeling it over, I think this is the best way to write it.