Before leaving

Pei Zhi tasted Xu Youling's physiological tears, a faint salty taste, very little, floating on the skin, and disappeared with a slight sip.

He held Xu Youling's shoulders and moved away a little, but his eyes were fixed on him without wavering. Xu Youling opened his eyes wide, as if he couldn't understand why this kiss had reached such an excessive level. Pei Zhi gently pinched his face to bring him back to his senses.

"Are you still going to sleep?" Pei Zhi asked in a low voice.

You can't really say you don't want to sleep.

Xu Youling lowered her eyes to avoid meeting Pei Zhi's intense gaze. She even tilted her head slightly, revealing only a section of her slender white neck. After a long moment, she stammered, "...next time."

“…”

Pei Zhi was stunned for a moment before realizing what Xu Youling was referring to. He couldn't help but laugh, and for a moment he failed to manage his expression. But the person in front of him was clearly genuinely embarrassed, with his head lowered, his chin almost touching his collarbone. Occasionally, he would lift his eyes and see Pei Zhi's surprise, which seemed even more embarrassing.

So Pei Zhi refused to let him escape.

"Next time what?" Pei Zhi turned his face back.

Xu Youling had already begun to regret his careless words and hummed "Nothing" softly.

"There must be something. You're hiding it from me again." Seeing Xu Youling's slightly parted lips, Pei Zhi's bullying spirit surged up, and he couldn't help but continue to press him, "Didn't you say you would be honest with me?"

I never said that. Xu Youling wanted to continue to be stubborn, but for some reason he couldn't speak. Pei Zhi pressed him even harder, his eyes cold, but his movements soft and firm, pulling him into his arms again, like a soft plant.

So he could only bite the bullet and whisper, "It means we'll kiss next time."

"Just want to kiss? Then what to do after the kiss?"

“…Just go to sleep.”

"Just sleep? Don't hold me anymore?"

"...I want to hug you."

"Why didn't you say so earlier?"

Pei Zhi chuckled contentedly, patted Xu Youling's waist suggestively, and pushed her back onto the bed. He felt the person in his palm stiffen almost instantly, looked at him tentatively, and took a deep breath.

"Do you really have to do this for you to stay?" Pei Zhi said.

Xu Youling knew he was referring to whether he would leave this world, but he couldn't give Pei Zhi anything that could be considered a promise or anything of the same nature, so he could only evade the question: "I don't know."

"You don't know." Pei Zhi repeated.

Both of them spoke in low voices, as if afraid of being heard by something called fate, which would then suddenly jump out from the dark corner.

Just hiding in this little bed in the attic, having long conversations in almost riddles, so as not to be deprived of all that is left of each other, which is already in their hands at this moment.

If you speak too loudly, the bubble will burst.

"I really don't know." Xu Youling's voice began to become a little hoarse.

Unaware of the true method and timing of escaping this world, was it fortunate or unfortunate? Xu Youling still believed that this moment would come when Pei Zhi's spiritual realm was completely "healed." But he couldn't convince himself that such an ending would be a good one.

Pei Zhi obviously thought so too, and breathed a sigh of relief: "If there is anything new... tell me."

"Okay." Xu Youling said in a low voice.

Pei Zhi nodded without comment, and kissed Xu Youling's eyes as if rewarding her: "Then go to sleep."

He pressed down the hand on Xu Youling's waist so that Xu Youling could lie more comfortably, half in his arms.

We had been cuddling each other to sleep like this for the past few days, but after the kiss, I always felt that something was different, very different.

Xu Youling felt Pei Zhi's body grow hotter, his heartbeat gurgling, and his heart surging. Another fact, however, softened his heart even more: the deep and sincere empathy between the sentinel and the guide, who had already formed an inextricable emotional bond.

That means Pei Zhi is very happy now.

Besides, even if she didn’t know that Pei Zhi was happy, Xu Youling herself was already happy enough now.

-

As the days move from early summer to midsummer, the days grow longer, the shadows of the trees fall on the ground, and the areas illuminated by the light begin to get hot.

Pei Zhi stayed in Xu Youling's shop for several weeks.

Xu Youling didn't live in the store often before. The attic was Lu Heng's territory. Later, Duan Xingzhi came with a sour face, and then Pei Zhi pushed open the glass door and came in with a very fresh reason. Xu Youling also stayed in the store.

He wanted to pretend that he had always lived in the store, not because of Pei Zhi, and it was not a compromise. However, Song Qi was desperate and could not stand it any longer. He came to the store and started shouting loudly after work. Soon Pei Zhi knew that Xu Youling was staying there because of him.

At least that's how Pei Zhi understood it, and he was even a little complacent about it.

She was so smug that she would ask from time to time: "Xu Youling, do you really like me?"

He was tall and had a cold temperament, so he was embarrassed to let others hear him when he asked this question, so he had to lower his head slightly and ask closer. After asking, he walked away with a smug look on his face.

And Xu Youling just said "hmm" softly.

Lu Heng didn't know why the two of them had so many secrets to talk about every day. She often passed by with a suspicious look on her face, looking at Xu Youling's slightly flushed face and Pei Zhi's expression that suddenly became excited but then tried hard to suppress it.

I can only confide one sincere word quietly: "Please don't have an office romance."

But he had nothing to say. Even though he had been giving Duan Xingzhi a cold shoulder for so long, the latter still stayed in the store with a gloomy face and acted like a boss.

It seemed like he would just wander around aimlessly like this forever, or lie on the sofa and stare at Lu Heng.

So Xu Youling did not expect that Duan Xingzhi would leave before Pei Zhi.

That day, as usual, he was cleaning up a guest's spirit body. It was a particularly good-tempered shrew, rubbing against him like a puppy. Xu Youling cleaned it up and was seeing the guest off when Lu Heng returned.

Lu Heng didn't show any signs of abnormality, so Xu Youling didn't ask and continued to clean his hands.

Then Lu Heng walked around the room a few times and couldn't help but say, "Duan Xingzhi went back."

"What?" Xu Youling was a little surprised, and subconsciously turned his gaze to the place where Duan Xingzhi usually was. It was indeed empty.

"That's quite normal, right? He shouldn't have stayed here so long." Lu Heng continued, "Doesn't he have his own things to do? He's just bored."

"I say... don't you have anything of your own to do?" Xu Youling recalled Lu Heng's earlier mention of his glorious past and couldn't help but add, "Isn't it a bit of a waste of talent to stay here forever?"

He thought Lu Heng would at least go with Duan Xingzhi and return to their familiar environment.

"There's nothing left to do." Lu Heng acted nonchalantly. "It's meaningless now."

Xu Youling nodded, not understanding why.

"But." Lu Heng's turn of events was always abrupt. "That doesn't mean that what you did is meaningless, ah."

"What do you mean?" Xu Youling asked humbly.

"What else could it be...your sentry." Lu Heng nudged him lightly. "Do whatever you want, seriously."

"Anyway, no matter if there are good results in the future, I will regret it." Lu Heng looked sincere.

Lu Heng, the speaker, had his own intentions, and Xu You, the listener, also had his own thoughts.

Therefore, as he watched the day of Pei Zhi's departure getting closer, the tension in his heart almost burst out of his throat.

It was a feeling of tension as if I was about to do something big.

-

On the day Pei Zhi was preparing to return to the border, he moved very quietly when he got up.

Xu Youling had long since become accustomed to sleeping in his arms, her limbs limp and soft in his arms, like a beautiful doll with its limbs loosened. She was obedient when he fiddled with her, and Pei Zhi expertly tucked her back into the blanket.

"Let's go." Pei Zhi kissed him on the forehead.

Xu Youling turned over and mumbled something, but Pei Zhi couldn't hear clearly, so he frowned and bent down to move closer. Xu Youling pulled at the corner of his clothes in his chaotic sleep.

"We really have to go, baby." Pei Zhi said softly.

He carefully pried open Xu Youling's fingers that were softly holding the corner of his clothes one by one, pinched the fingertips, then closed them in his palm, lifted them up and kissed them, then slowly put them back on the blanket.

"Will you miss me?" Pei Zhi asked softly, "Will you miss me?"

He didn't really need an answer that could only be known in words, because Xu Youling was his guide. Even if there were no other factors, the imprint left by long-term close contact would make Xu Youling remember him forever.

Maybe even after he returned to that world.

But Pei Zhi still hoped that if Xu Youling wanted to remember him and miss him, it would be because he loved him and liked him, rather than because of the natural bond between a sentinel and a guide.

These things caused Xu Youling a lot of suffering, and he felt sorry for him.

When he stood up, the German Shepherd followed first and reluctantly touched Xu Youling's lowered hand with its wet nose.

Pei Zhi didn't look back, but just hooked his hand behind him. The German Shepherd raised its front paw and touched its nose angrily, then followed Pei Zhi downstairs.

The area around the White Pagoda is hot in the summer, but at the border thousands of kilometers away, the north wind still blows in your face.

Pei Zhi paused when he was leaving, looked back at the shop sign, then turned around and walked back the way he came to the station at the other end of the city.

While waiting for the bus, he found the envelope and took out the application form to study for a while. The latest deadline had passed, and now he had no new excuse to marry Xu Youling.

Anyway, it was he who applied in the first place, and it wasn't a mandatory requirement from the White Tower.

But they will definitely meet again, because they are already close lovers, although... Xu Youling hasn't said it yet, but that's just because he is a little shy. Yes, Pei Zhi knows that he is a very shy person.

As the sentinel and guide of lovers, no matter how far apart they are, they will feel as if the other person is right next to them and be physically close to them.

After Pei Zhi has finished dealing with everything in the expeditionary force, he will come to pick up Xu Youling.

They could stay together, or think of other solutions, but they couldn't separate. Pei Zhi was certain there would be another way.

At least I was still very sure until I saw Xu Youling running towards me, panting, holding the orange cat.