Do you remember when we first met?

Xiang Wan gazed at the scenery below the mountain and spoke as if reminiscing. He Yang remained silent. Xiang Wan's lips curled slightly; she hadn't expected him to remember anyway.

That afternoon, the sun was shining brightly. I was in a hurry to get back to my dorm to get my resume. I wasn't looking where I was going and bumped into you. The questionnaires in your hand scattered all over the ground. At that moment, I was thinking, "How stupid of me to choose this time to do a survey. Graduating students are all rushing out of school. Who will even glance at your questionnaires?"

I still remember that time. You helped me up, asked if I was hurt, and even took a tissue from your bag to wipe my sweat. Your gentle gaze and concerned expression touched my heart, giving me a feeling unlike any I'd ever experienced before. I watched you kneel down, pick up the scattered questionnaires one by one, organize them, and then stand up to say goodbye. Your back was tall and strong, and I found myself following behind you without realizing it, until you turned around and asked what was wrong.

"I remember you helped me with the questionnaire later, and every student in your class was included."

“Because of helping you, I missed a very important interview for me. But I think it was worth it because I met you!” Xiang Wan turned her head and smiled at He Yang, “At that time, I felt that meeting you was a blessing from God, so no matter what, I had to try my best.”

He Yang lowered his head, gripping the railing of the observation deck with both hands, loosening and tightening his grip repeatedly, pursing his lips, but ultimately remaining silent.

Xiang Wan understood; he must want to ask about that matter but didn't know how to bring it up. Now, Xiang Wan decided not to hide it anymore.

"You want to ask about that, right? I told you from the beginning, we never had any relationship, never!"

He Yang suddenly looked up, staring at Xiang Wan in disbelief, waiting for her explanation.

“That morning, after you woke up, you ran away in a panic. Later, you found me and said you wanted to take responsibility for me. I told you then that I didn’t need you to take responsibility, and there was nothing between us, but you didn’t believe me! I didn’t want our beginning to be like this, but your kindness to me later made me infatuated. I didn’t want to explain anymore, so I just went with the flow. I thought that as long as the result was good, the process didn’t matter.”

“Tell me,” He Yang’s voice trembled slightly, his fingertips gripping the railing turning slightly white, “tell me, what exactly happened that day?”

Finally, she asked. Xiang Wan looked up into the distance, trying to suppress the bitterness in her heart, "Your company had a party, and our company happened to be in the same restaurant. When I came out of the private room, I saw you go into the next room. We partied very late that day, and all my colleagues left, but I stayed behind to see when you would leave."

Do you know? Seeing you laughing and joking with your colleagues, but your gaze kept lingering on a certain corner. Do you know how much it hurt me at that moment? You didn't say it outright, but I could tell that the female colleague you secretly admired was a married woman.

You drank too much, and when they tried to leave, I helped you up, pretended to be your girlfriend, and took you to a hotel. I stayed with you all night, not sleeping. You woke up in the middle of the night to vomit, covering yourself in it, and I called a waiter to change your clothes. So, that day, nothing really happened between us. Are you relieved now?

He Yang's eyes were filled with disbelief, tinged with bitterness. After a long silence, he sighed and said in an almost inaudible voice, "It's all in the past, all in the past!"

"No, I can't get past this!" Xiang Wan took a deep breath and slowly exhaled, saying, "I'm like a thief, secretly watching you, waiting for the right moment to steal you to my side. So, it's no wonder I can't win your heart, no wonder I've given so much, yet I can't compete with that white moonlight in your heart."

I know all your little habits: you like to bite your nails when you're thinking, you like to touch the door frame when you go out, you don't like clothes with overly bright patterns, you have to wear socks with left and right sides, you don't like wearing T-shirts in the summer, you don't like wearing scarves in the winter, you don't like food that's too hard, you don't like putting chives or cilantro in your dishes, you like spicy food but don't like garlic, your favorite food is boiled fish, you need to get your hair trimmed if it even slightly covers your eyes, the first thing you do when you get home is sit on the sofa for a while before changing your shoes, and you get very irritable if you get up too early in the morning.

And most importantly, that's your sense of responsibility. Once you've decided on something, you'll see it through to the end. Before, that was what I loved most about you; now, it's also what I hate most about you. You clearly don't like me that much, you clearly don't love me, yet you pretend to be happy, making me slowly sink into the tenderness you've woven, unable to extricate myself.

He Yang, I stole your time, I deceived myself, even our marriage was a performance I orchestrated. What did you do? The only thing you did was try your best to please me.

Do you know what I like and dislike? Do you know I'm allergic to chili peppers? For you, I force myself to eat chili peppers every day, just so we can share something we both like, practically turning my allergy into a non-allergic one. You think I'm like you, disliking bright clothes and vibrant makeup, but these are every woman's favorites. When I'm sick, you only tell me to drink more hot water, not knowing that what I really want is just a word of concern from you. Waiting for you until late at night every day isn't just to see you, but also to escape the fear of being alone in the darkness. You never call beforehand to reassure me, leaving me alone to wait silently.

He Yang, do you even understand that the most important thing in a marriage is mutual affection? If only one party is giving, that's not love, that's blackmail. I say I want to marry you, and you agree? If you use your sense of responsibility to repay my love, that's irresponsible! I'd rather not have a marriage like that!

Xiang Wan sat on the sofa, lost in thought all night about her and He Yang. It wasn't until dawn that she suddenly realized that the way He Yang looked at An Shui'er in the story had never appeared in her eyes! Never!

He Yang's gaze towards Xiang Wan contained emotion, joy, surprise, and hesitation, but no love! This was the key reason why Xiang Wan made this decision today!

In the story, Xiang Wan spent her entire life realizing that forced relationships and bound marriages will ultimately lead to loss. Her sacrifices and what she believed to be love were, in He Yang's eyes, nothing more than a means to keep him around!

Ha, how ridiculous! All those missions and worlds she longed to return to, all for this love story she thought was perfect! If she hadn't returned, and had finally gotten the chance to come back, what would she have done then?