55/two or three lines

In early November, the temperature dropped significantly.

Northern Suiyuan only has three seasons a year, and the missing winter in northern Beijing is fully made up for.

Seeing Chen Mian huddled in her scarf, Deng Momo smiled and told her that she would see snow around the end of the month. Then, she added some romantic descriptions of winter, such as having a snowball fight in the snow or walking down the street with a hot roasted sweet potato in her hand, watching the steam and the white mist rising up together. Wearing gloves and earmuffs, she would crawl into the white fur collar of a down jacket, preferably with someone she liked by her side.

"It's simply a perfect winter!" Deng Momo concluded, huddled under the covers.

Su Wangqiu, who was making a video call, chuckled and retorted, "When you crawl into bed in the middle of the night and your feet are still freezing, and your fingers feel like they don't belong to you when you reply to a message, then this winter is indeed quite perfect."

Just as the two were about to start arguing again, Yu Yu, who was reading a book, interrupted them and asked Chen Mian, "Are you going to tutor so early?"

Chen Mian packed her things and slung her bag over her shoulder. "Well, that family had something to do this afternoon, so they moved the time to this morning."

"Then be careful!" her roommate waved to her.

It took her an hour and a half to get to her part-time job from school. She was tutoring a third-grade girl from a single-parent family. This job was recommended to her by a senior student in her department. The senior said that the girl's mother was easy to get along with and had a straightforward personality. She wasn't the kind of parent who was difficult to deal with. The only problem was that the location was a bit far away, but she only came two days a week, on weekends, and was paid by the hour.

The little girl's name is Yaoyao. Compared to girls her age, she is introverted and doesn't talk much. Her senior once told Chen Mian that she felt they were somewhat similar. This similarity had nothing to do with appearance but rather with the feeling they gave off. At first, Chen Mian didn't understand where the similarity lay; in her opinion, they had nothing in common.

One rainy day, while gazing out the window, she suddenly asked Chen Mian, "Sister, why was I born?"

Chen Mian didn't know how to answer. A professor at the school once said that she lacked empathy. Law is ultimately a social science, based on human beings. However, when faced with certain cases, Chen Mian's rationality was almost indifferent.

She is unable to empathize with the plight of the vulnerable and offer understanding and comfort beyond her professional knowledge; she merely coldly piles up laws and regulations to provide the so-called optimal solution.

So when Yao Yao asked this question, she didn't patiently comfort her or give her romantic fairy tales like adults would when treating children. Instead, she simply said that being born is something you don't have the right to choose.

Yao Yao seemed to understand but not quite, and finally sighed with a feigned maturity, "That's really terrible."

Then Chen Mian understood that what her senior was referring to as similarity was that she and Yao Yao shared a pessimistic view of the world.

They think the world is terrible and don't understand why they came into this world.

After that, Yao Yao became much closer to her and felt that she had found a perfect confidante. Chen Mian was different from others. She would not laugh at her pretentious maturity, nor would she think that she was just overthinking because she had less homework. In front of Chen Mian, she was an independent soul who could be respected.

During tutoring sessions, she would occasionally bring up some whimsical ideas about the world, saying that the world actually has an end, and that what seems like sleeping at night is actually death, only to be 'resurrected' when you open your eyes during the day.

Then he said to Chen Mian, "Sister, do you think death is the end of life?"

The course content had gone astray, and Chen Mian realized that this was not within her responsibilities. She did not answer Yao Yao's question, but simply pointed to the textbook and finished her lesson. After leaving Yao Yao's house, she started calling Yao Yao's mother.

There was no answer for a long time; only a mechanical female voice said that the number you dialed was busy and to try again later.

Chen Mian saw her past self in Yao Yao. After Ruan Yanmei left, she was afraid to go home and hid at a convenience store to work part-time. She listened to the "Welcome" greetings and silently observed all the customers who came to shop. Sometimes it was parents who came to buy candy because their children were being coaxed, sometimes it was peers who were laughing and buying snacks with their friends, and sometimes it was adults who were flattering and fawning on the other end of the phone and then immediately started yelling insults after the call ended.

At that time, Chen Mian also thought the world was really terrible, and everyone was happier than her. At least they had a place to go after buying things from the convenience store, but she didn't.

She called Yao Yao's mother as she walked towards the bus stop.

The call connected quickly this time, and the person on the other end asked her in a low voice what was wrong.

“Yaoyao’s mood is a bit off. If you have time, I suggest you take her to see a psychologist.”

He whispered to the people around him to wait a moment, then took the phone to an open space and asked anxiously, "What's wrong with Yaoyao?"

One pessimistic question after another inquired about the reason for her birth. Chen Mian had experienced all of this, but no one had ever provided her with an answer.

Chen Mian looked up at the overcast sky and said to the person on the other end of the phone, "She's calling for help."

The rain started falling at that moment. I hung up the phone and put it in my bag.

The nearest convenience store was a ten-minute walk away. As the rain intensified, Chen Mian didn't stop and walked directly into the rain.

She hadn't gone far when she heard someone calling her name. She turned around and saw Lin Yuqing getting out of the car with an umbrella over Chen Mian. He was a little out of breath. "Why aren't you using an umbrella? Are you doing a part-time job here?"

Some of them asked questions they already knew the answer to. The senior who introduced Chen Mian to the part-time job was his friend. He had created so-called chance encounters in the vicinity more than once, driving around her like a primary school student showing off a toy, opening the passenger seat to invite her to dinner or drive her back to school, but all of these invitations were rejected without exception.

No scene gave him as much confidence as this moment. The timely rain made his umbrella a lifesaver. His red and white striped sports jacket was soaked, and raindrops seeped into his neck, making the collar of his white shirt underneath wet.

Chen Mian's gaze lingered on his coat for a moment before shifting away. Pushing the umbrella handle, she said to Lin Yuqing, "No need, I'm already soaked."

Lin Yuqing laughed, "That's why you need an umbrella, because you're soaked. Shall I take you back to school? It's a long walk to the bus stop, but my car is right there." He pointed behind him, where a black Audi was parked.

As nearby residents' cars passed by, splashing water onto Lin Yuqing's trousers, which were blocking Chen Mian's way.

Chen Mian felt a little annoyed.

She politely rejected all those who tried to win her favor, but Lin Yuqing remained unmoved, always believing that she would be the exception and that the pursuit would eventually lead to a good outcome, like water dripping on a stone.

"Senior brother, don't you understand?"

She coldly raised her eyes, looked at Lin Yuqing standing in the rain, and simply stated her words clearly.

"I just don't want to get in your car."

Lin Yuqing was stunned, and before she could react, she saw Chen Mian walk straight away from under the umbrella.

The rain soaked her completely, turning her walk into a jog. Only when her figure disappeared around the corner did Lin Yuqing chuckle helplessly, close her umbrella, and look up at the endless rain.

"Chen Mian is so hard to win over."

*

It seemed as if all her good luck had been used up on the night Su Wangqiu's ambiguous boyfriend treated her to a meal.

She saw the sinking realm, and then all sorts of terrible things came rushing in.

Being criticized by a professor, encountering obstacles in academic work, meeting a girl with depressive tendencies at a part-time job, and rainy days.

She ran all the way to the bus stop, soaked to the bone, but the bus never came. Finally, she checked her phone app and found that the next bus wouldn't arrive for another half hour.

And then another bad thing happened: waiting for a bus to take you back in the rain.

She sat on a chair at the bus stop, her scarf soaked, so she took it off and used it to wipe her wet hair.

A cold wind blew by, and she shivered. Raindrops fell like silver chains from the bus shelter.

There was no one around; she was all alone, sitting there waiting for her ride.

At this moment, Yao Yao's mother's anxious voice echoed in her mind again. Chen Mian inevitably thought of Ruan Yanmei, who had the same identity, and then, almost in a fairy tale fantasy, she swapped her own situation with Yao Yao's.

She wondered what would have happened if Ruan Yanmei hadn't given up on her, but instead raised her like Yao Yao's mother, relying solely on her own strength no matter how hard she worked.

Perhaps they will feel lonely, doing their homework in their room while feeling envious of other happy children their age.

Then she asked the older sister who came to tutor her if death was the end.

With eyes full of longing that they themselves didn't even realize they were asking questions, they didn't need answers. Like a child deliberately causing trouble to attract their parents' attention, they were just hoping to get a little attention in that way, just speaking in their own soft voice.

—Could you spend some time with me?

Zhao Lili said that loving and being loved are both freedoms, and the medals gained on the road to becoming better are just stepping stones to raise the courage to touch.

Chen Mian looked at the continuous heavy rain, her thoughts in turmoil, wandering between different ideas. Finally, she checked her phone and realized that only ten minutes had passed.

Deng Momo called her and asked where she was now because she hadn't brought an umbrella when she went out.

Chen Mian said softly, "I'll come back to the house where I'm doing part-time work after the rain stops."

She breathed a sigh of relief and smiled at her with a slightly exaggerated tone, "I was so scared, I thought you got caught in the rain. Getting caught in the rain in this weather will definitely make you catch a cold. Be careful, Mianmian. If you can't get back, call me and I'll come pick you up."

Chen Mian nodded, and after hanging up the phone, she heard someone honking a car horn at her.

She thought it was Lin Yuqing.

Still with her head down, she said in a somewhat impatient tone, "I can go back to school by myself."

However, no gentle reply was heard from the other party.

Raindrops pattered onto her shoes, and a black car wheel came into view, positioned opposite the toe of her shoe.

The streetlights appeared as two or three rows of shadows in the rain, even occupying the space of the road and running across it, making reality seem like a fiction.

The raindrops were tinged with a dim yellow by the lamplight.

She looked up and, through the rolled-down passenger window, saw Chen Yu in the driver's seat.

The drumbeats of the music seemed to be blowing out of the car window along with the wind.

He didn't speak, but just looked at her, the music in the car lingering on the ambiguous word "baby".

He stayed in the car untouched by the rain, while she was soaked to the bone as she walked through the downpour.

It was like cutting back from the end of a movie to the beginning. The same bus stop, the same rain, almost the same scene as Suibei. The only difference was that Shen Yu didn't open the car door and walk towards her, nor did he reach out to ask her if she needed help.

I just sat in the driver's seat, watching her through the rain.

Then Chen Mian realized that the rain wouldn't stop.

/

Car music: We could have been so good together (Please don't mention anything related to this article in the comments!)