Chapter 64 No one is unworthy of living

Her longing burned like fire, searing her heart.

Ling Shu controlled the instinctive impulses from her other half of the demon race, determined not to fall into her arms again when she was vulnerable, and not to crave the tenderness she gave her. So she chose to recuperate at Xinglin Peak.

But as night fell, the surrounding liveliness vanished, and she stared at the flower and fruit baskets that others had brought to visit her. Loneliness, like the thick snow in a winter night, pressed down on her, making it hard to breathe.

After this victory, Ling Shu knew that he had finally been accepted by the Shangqing Sect.

She doesn't care much about herself; she's thinking about someone else.

The grander the celebration, the more profound the loneliness that follows.

Zhuang Jinfu was even more lonely than she had ever experienced. In the long life of the Immortal Venerable, she had repeatedly redeemed people time and time again. People celebrated, and after the same joy, how did she put her emotions to rest?

In traditional stories, after saving the world, the savior always returns to a warm place where there are family, sisters, and lovers. But when Zhuang Jinfu looked back, there was only a lonely, vast palace.

Ling Shu understood her loneliness.

With such heartache, Ling Shu smiled with relief. She had finally found a reason to meet him: after the victory, her disciple should share the joy with his master.

So she threw off the covers, got out of bed, rushed out of the ward, bypassed the joyful crowd, sneaked down the mountain, stepped into the desolate place, and broke into the palace of the Immortal Venerable.

Upon entering, she saw a person with a radiant, moon-like glow sitting high on the throne in the hall, exuding an otherworldly and noble air, which immediately made her shrink back.

Disturbing the immortal's tranquility went against her belief in keeping the lonely moon high in the sky. Realizing what she was doing, Ling Shu staggered away.

"Shu'er!"

The noble person was chasing after her, and Ling Shu didn't dare to look back. In her panic, she ran away without thinking. How could she escape from her?

Ling Shu thought of the Zhujin Mountain that she had once taken her to.

There's a fog formation outside that place, so it's impossible to get down the mountain now. She'll definitely hold the mountain gate to the death, so I might as well hide in the fog formation for a while.

She moved nimbly, making sharp turns and twists and turns, hiding behind the rocks, and took off her red hair ribbon, transforming into a red fox, running in the opposite direction.

A fairy in white called out "Shu'er" repeatedly as she chased after the fox, which ran away from her sight.

Ling Shu ran confidently towards Zhujin Mountain, venturing into the misty maze.

In the darkness, even the moonlight couldn't penetrate the fog; it was pitch black, like being in a world of ink.

He walked a little further in, trying to hide himself better, when he suddenly saw some light. He looked down and saw the lotus-patterned jade pendant on his waist emitting a faint golden light.

What does this mean?

Following this glimmer of light, Ling Shu discovered that the fog before her had parted to reveal a path, the destination of which was unknown.

She followed along, and every now and then, wildly growing bamboo leaves would block her path. But if she pushed them aside, the path would become clear again.

The road came to an end, where a small house, a piano platform, a stream, winding steps leading upwards, and an ancient pine tree on the mountaintop came into view.

It turns out that this jade pendant is the key to entering Zhujin Mountain.

Entering Zhujin Mountain means that Zhuang Jinfu won't be able to find her even if he wants to. Zhujin Mountain has a very good barrier to prevent outsiders from eavesdropping, so she can be completely hidden here.

She dared not go to the hut, fearing there might be some kind of barrier that could alert the owner. She went around it and climbed the Qin Terrace, but didn't dare touch the qin. When she reached the top of the mountain, she passed the chess platform and the ancient pine tree. There, they became master and disciple. It was Zhuang Jinfu's first place to teach her about cultivation.

Ling Shu sat down and stroked the boulder. It was here that she broke through the Qi Refining stage and entered the Foundation Establishment stage. On that occasion, she refused to call Zhuang Jinfu her master. She was a stubborn person who did not know etiquette. The immortal venerable one above all others was offended by her time and time again, and he chose to forgive her each time.

She couldn't understand how someone could be so tolerant.

Not far away was the very place where that heartless stranger had first taught her swordsmanship.

Memories welled up, and so did tears.

——

Zhuang Jinfu remained silent in the palace, the spacious hall empty of people. Hai Gu knocked on her door, but was not allowed to enter, and did not knock again.

She sat on her throne in the palace, waiting for dawn.

Waiting for the sun to rise.

Because the person I want to hold in my arms is as scorching as the sun.

She thought that her path destined her to never have a lover or possess the art of spirits in this life, so let the warm sun shine upon her, as if it were her embracing her from afar.

Suddenly, a familiar, sun-like aura quietly approached.

Her heart was pounding.

The palace door was jolted open by an external force, and a figure in lotus root pink stood in the doorway, a pair of fox ears twitching on its head. It cast a burning and longing gaze over, but when it met the figure's eyes, it showed a look of panic and turned to leave.

Ling Shu was in a hurry and tripped on the threshold. She staggered a few steps before running out.

"Shu'er!"

Zhuang Jinfu chased after her, blaming herself for teaching her too well. Her movements were too fast; the pinkish-white figure disappeared before her eyes. Soon, a fiery red fox darted out from the side and ran ahead.

She chased after it, and in a flash, she was in front of the fox. The fox couldn't turn, and it ran headfirst into her arms. When her hand touched the soft fox fur, she breathed a sigh of relief, and a smile involuntarily crept onto her lips.

The little fox came to rescue her from the deathly silence and loneliness.

But in the next instant, the fox transformed into a red hair ribbon.

She ran away.

"Why……"

"You came and now you're leaving."

Either don't come at all, or don't let me know what warmth is.

The icy magical power rapidly spread across the ground of Qingxi Mountain, reaching the entire mountain in search of Ling Shu's whereabouts. The returning magical power found no trace of him.

If she's not at Qingxi Mountain, then she's gone back.

Zhuang Jinfu chased after her, heading towards Xinglin Peak. No master would fail to visit their sick disciple, so having found the right excuse, she descended the mountain with a clear conscience.

——

Ling Shu cried herself to sleep and lay down on the cold stone, sleeping under the moon. She slept restlessly and woke up late at night.

The person I wanted to see has been seen.

Although I only caught a glimpse of it from afar.

But that wasn't enough for her. She needed an embrace that felt like they were melting into each other's bodies, a resounding declaration of love, and a deep, lingering kiss to soothe even a fraction of her anxiety.

These are things that Zhuang Jinfu cannot give.

Perhaps she should blame herself for falling in love with the wrong person.

She was lost in thought, berating herself. This overwhelming emotion was all her own fault; perhaps it was the karmic punishment for falling in love with the Guardian Immortal. She needed to slowly sever these ties.

He got used to the withdrawal symptoms of being away from Zhuang Jinfu.

I got up, went to the stream, and washed my face to wipe away the tears.

Zhuang Jinfu should stop looking for her. It's already past midnight, and if she hasn't returned by dawn, the people at Xinglin Peak will be worried.

Ling Shu walked to the front of the cabin and followed the old path back, only to see the figure of the person she had been thinking about day and night at the exit.

"So you were here."

Zhuang Jinfu's eyes were red, and she looked like she was about to go crazy with anxiety.

Ling Shu turned around and ran back without thinking twice.

She tried the same trick again, but it was completely blocked. An impenetrable barrier appeared around her, the door of the cabin was blasted open, and Ling Shu was dragged into the cabin by the arm.

The room was simply furnished, and the first thing you saw upon entering was a striking tatami mat.

The two entered the room, and with a bang, the door slammed shut.

Ling Shu ran to climb out the window, but the window was closed, and a barrier that only Zhuang Jinfu could open was placed all around.

They're doomed.

Where else would you like to go?

The person behind her walked over quickly and flicked a red ribbon across Ling Shu's face.

Zhuang Jinfu's tone was unfriendly, he was about to explode with anger: "You're getting bolder and bolder, you even dare to lie to me."

"Ever since the Tongxuan Secret Realm, you've been avoiding me. Why didn't you come back after the Bitan Mountain incident yesterday?!"

Ling Shu held the hair ribbon tightly and whispered, "I'm not feeling well, and I'm going to Xinglin Peak for treatment."

She retorted with a question: "If you insist on going to Xinglin Peak for treatment, I can treat you too, why didn't you come to me?!"

Ling Shu said hesitantly, "I don't want to trouble you."

Zhuang Jin moved closer to her: "Don't make excuses, tell me the truth, why are you avoiding me?"

Ling Shu pursed her lips and turned her head to stare at the floor.

She stopped in front of me, and when she received no answer, she continued to press, "Why do you try to hide when you see me?"

Ling Shu felt extremely embarrassed when pressed for answers, and pretended to be absent-minded: "It's nothing."

"Speak!" Zhuang Jinfu grabbed her arms with both hands, his tone urgent, almost shouting.

Ling Shu felt a pang of sadness and tried to break free from her grip, saying listlessly, "There's nothing to say."

Zhuang Jinfu had no intention of letting her off the hook, and said stubbornly, "You must give me an answer today."

Ling Shu remained silent.

Zhuang Jinfu couldn't bear her silence, feeling as if his heart was being ripped out: "If you won't tell me, what is it that you're hiding from me like this? Is it Zhao Chi? You like Zhao Chi, don't you? You're afraid I won't agree, so you're stubbornly refusing to say anything."

"..." No, it's you. I'm afraid you'll callously expose me and become the next Gu Wan.

"Shu'er, no matter why, please don't suddenly disappear from my sight, okay?"

"Um."

A cool embrace held her close, and Ling Shu secretly rested her face against her, trying to hold back her tears.

Ling Shu did not resist, and Zhuang Jinfu's heart softened. He said slowly, "I didn't see you when I arrived at Xinglin Peak. I was so afraid that something had happened to you."

"I searched the entire Shangqing Mountain but couldn't find you. I was so worried I was going crazy. Shu'er, no matter what, please don't hide from me anymore, okay? If you like Zhao Chi, go and be with Zhao Chi. I won't object. I'm just afraid that an assassination attempt like the one in the past will happen to you."

The person in my arms shrugged, and a soft sob came from within.

This small man, who knows what kind of harrowing life he has experienced in the past, is being well cared for in Qingxi Mountain. He hasn't grown fat yet, and his thin shoulders, restrained cries, and fox ears that he can't retract all pierce Zhuang Jinfu's heart.

"What's wrong?" Zhuang Jinfu asked patiently and gently.

Ling Shu slowly raised the bow and arrow she had found, sobbing as she complained, "Master, someone wants to kill me..."

"That person has high magical power, definitely above the Nascent Soul stage. I don't know why, but they all want me dead."

"Master, am I really not worthy of living?"

The fox ears were pressed back, and its head shrank into the crook of her shoulder; the person in her arms was truly frightened.

"So you're avoiding me because you're afraid I'll be the one to kill you, right?"

Ling Shu remained noncommittal, which was also a good reason to avoid the issue.

Zhuang Jinfu took the bow and arrow, carefully examining the residual magical energy on it, and said gently, "I will not kill you, never."

No one is unworthy of living.

The residual magical energy on it was equally intense. Zhuang Jinfu probed out, but it wasn't Ling Shu's energy. It was the residual magical energy left behind by a Mahayana cultivator. In the entire Shangqing Sect, only Cang Luo was a Mahayana cultivator.

She knew why Cang Luo wanted Ling Shu dead. Unlike the rabbit demon, who was driven by power, profit, and cultivation, Cang Luo was an absolute righteous person. She and Wang Lifu were the same kind of people. For the greater good and for so-called justice, they were willing to sacrifice some people, even their own lives.

Canglu realized her feelings for Lingshu, feelings she couldn't sever, and Canglu wanted to cut them off for her.

The bow and arrow deformed and bent in Zhuang Jinfu's hands.

Her affairs are not for others to decide.

She put away her bow and arrows because Ling Shu was still crying.

He helped her to sit down on the couch and gently wiped away the tears from her eyes with a handkerchief. Ling Shu hadn't answered earlier; something else must have been affecting her, because ever since they entered the Tongxuan Secret Realm, Ling Shu had become distant.

She gently coaxed, "Shu'er, don't treat your master like an outsider, okay?"