Chapter 67
If Aluka hadn't pointed it out, I wouldn't have even noticed what I'd been doing. It was only after he pointed it out that I snapped back to reality—
I actually helped Hisoka without even realizing it.
Why should I help him?
It's only because I proposed to him, but that so-called "proposal" was a complete joke; I wasn't sincere. Theoretically, I shouldn't have any feelings for him whatsoever.
I felt a wave of confusion and stood there, momentarily at a loss.
I didn't move, so Alka obediently stood there blankly.
...It took me a while to finally find my voice.
"I see," I said, trying to sound nonchalant. "Let's find a place to sit down first."
Then, we moved together to a small clinic.
I originally wanted to go to a coffee shop, but the young version of Hisoka was covered in blood, which would frequently attract the attention of passersby when he walked down the street, so I had to give up on the idea.
Anyway... let's go treat his wound first.
Sitting in the clinic chairs, Aruka and I fell silent again.
Although I'm reluctant to admit Alka's speculation, at present, the only person we need to "save" is Hisoka, which means that Alka's speculation is completely correct.
This made me feel inexplicably uncomfortable.
I looked down at my ten fingers, absentmindedly recalling the scene of using the "limb bending technique" just now, and meaninglessly marveling at how I could still use this move so quickly and skillfully. Milluki's special training back then was really effective.
Alka kept her face buried in the doll.
Then something suddenly occurred to me, and I asked him:
How many people have you saved?
Arka blinked, moved her little face away from the doll, stared at me with her round cat eyes, and tilted her head.
“…I don’t remember,” he said.
A moment later, as if remembering something happy, Alka beamed with joy and said in a cheerful tone:
"But I've saved many people I really like... and there have been times when I couldn't save them. I sometimes think that if I had handled that matter more carefully according to my brother's wishes, things might not be like this today... But when I save someone I like, I'm really happy!"
"You haven't spent much time with Killua in a long time, have you?" I asked. "Are you happy about that?"
Aluka frowned, looking unhappy.
Oh no.
I realized that I had fallen back into my habit of hurting people with my words.
But compared to those I hurt in the past, Alka is truly innocent.
I shouldn't have done that, at least not to Aluka.
So I started racking my brains: what should I say to make up for the mistakes I've made with this old habit?
...However, unexpectedly, Alka, who looked round and soft, and although she had grown bigger than before, was still just a child, managed to adjust her mood on her own, slowly raised her face, and smiled again.
“It’s okay,” he said. “I’m protecting my brother… I’m happy, and my brother will be happy to know.”
"Although we won't see each other for now," he said, gripping the toy's paw with a tense expression, "but... if we persevere, we'll see each other someday."
persist in.
These two words sound so unattainable.
I knew that if I opened my mouth, I would definitely not say anything nice, so I chose to remain silent, purse my lips, and look away.
"...Probably." But in the end, I still spoke, saying it against my true feelings.
Aluka laughed again.
The doctor was busy, and Aluka and I waited a while longer before he announced to us that Hisoka's wound had been completely treated.
I stood up and leaned over to take a look. The clinic doctor had even wiped the blood off his face.
But... the clothes were covered in blood clots.
For no apparent reason, I felt the urge to do something more, so I discussed it with Aluka:
"I'll go buy him some clothes."
Alka stood rooted to the spot, neither agreeing nor disagreeing, his little face tense. As I moved toward the door, he clung tightly to my back.
"What's wrong?" I couldn't help but ask.
Aluka said, "Sister Lei... let's go."
I asked curiously, "Where did you go? Your ability wasn't activated, and Hisoka might still be in danger, so that's why we're staying here, right?"
Alka said, "That's not what I meant... Sister, let's hide."
I:""
I was very puzzled, but Alka wouldn't say anything more, she just frowned and looked unhappy.
He couldn't give me a reason for hiding, so of course I wasn't going to go along with him. In the end, I left Hisoka and Alka behind and went shopping by myself.
“You can’t come with me,” I tried to explain to Alluka. “If we both disappear, and Hisoka is left unattended, what if something happens to him? Wouldn’t we have to come back here all over again?”
Aluka: "Sister, just don't think about saving him..."
I:"……"
We simply can't discuss this issue.
I chose to avoid the topic and left directly.
Compared to the other Zoldyck kids, Alluka was practically an innocent and harmless little lamb. I wasn't worried about what she would do to Hisoka after I left, and indeed she was. Twenty minutes later, when I returned to the clinic, everything was exactly the same as before, without any changes.
Hisoka lay unconscious on the hospital bed with his eyes closed, while Alluka sat idly beside him, hugging a doll.
I placed the clothes on Hisoka's bedside table, then turned to Alka and asked:
"...Are you leaving?"
His eyes widened in surprise: "Sister—"
They seemed surprised that I would make such a suggestion.
“I don’t know why you said you wanted to hide,” I said, “but I think you must have your own reasons… For the time being, let’s hide here as you suggested.”
He was so happy he almost jumped for joy.
But I couldn't help thinking about my cold and indifferent behavior towards him, and I guiltily looked away from his bright eyes, my gaze drifting to every corner of the room.
...Would this make you happy?
He's so unlike a Zoldyck!
This doubt persisted until we found a hiding place outside the clinic.
Once out of the sight of strangers, Aluka cheerfully began to share with me his memories of embarking on solo journeys:
"I've met Sister Lei a few times before—"
"Really?" I was still unsure what tone and attitude to use when speaking to him.
“Yes,” Aluka said sweetly, “Sister Lei was very, very kind of her. She gave me some delicious little cake and hid me when they were trying to catch me.”
Me: "...Yes, that's true."
He scratched his head: "Yes, but my sister might not know..."
He paused for a moment after saying this before pulling himself together again. I guessed that what he said might be true; he had indeed met "me," and "I" had been friendly to him, but that was me from another timeline.
"Is this me in the future?" Then I asked him, "What will I be like back then?"
Alka frowned deeply, and reluctantly replied, drawing out her words:
"Not entirely... It wouldn't matter if my sister knew, because this ability has messed up everyone's stories. These stories could change at any time."
Then, under my probing gaze, he slowly began to recount his memories, revealing several different endings for my future, based solely on his experiences.
"The first time I met my sister after I grew up... was at home..." he stammered, this memory clearly mixed with a lot of things he didn't like, his expression full of resistance, "It was my sister who was in danger... Killua was with me at that time, I don't remember my sister anymore, it was my brother who wanted to save my sister, that's why we went there."
"On Kukuroku Mountain?" I asked. "What dangers might I encounter?"
“There’s been a betrayal within the housekeeper’s household,” Alka said. “It’s caused by something we didn’t handle properly before… Sister didn’t have to die, but you pushed Killua away.”
Did I die that time...?
“Yes,” he said, then fell silent for a long time before adding, “Killua said that half of your death was his fault, because he abandoned you, didn’t care about you, and let you marry Illumi…”
"I still married Illumi..."
“In that timeline, it was like this,” Alluka said. “No one disobeyed Big Brother’s wishes, everything was peaceful, Big Brother and Sister were together, and you listened to Big Brother very much. Killua sent you a message, and you handed it all over to Big Brother. You refused to leave the room where you were waiting for Big Brother. Even when Killua wanted to rescue you, you refused him, pushed him away, and then died.”
It's exactly what I expected. Being with Illumi, sooner or later I'll become a complete puppet.
So I laughed and said nonchalantly, "Oh, I see. ...Is there anything else?"
“And another time,” Aluka said, “Sister Lai was still with Big Brother, but she didn’t want to listen to him. She ran away on the night of the wedding, saying she was going to take a boat and that her lover was waiting for her on the other side of the sea.”
"And then what happened?" I asked.
"My older brother said that my sister disappointed him too much... If she continues to be so willful, he will have no choice but to resort to methods that my sister doesn't like. Then my sister got so scared that she jumped into the sea herself."
Oh, so in short, nothing good ever happens when you're with Illumi, right?
It's reasonable and expected.
I asked nonchalantly, "Is there anything else?"
“And another time,” Alluka surprisingly described a third possible outcome for me and Illumi together, “my sister was happily with my brother, with no one on her mind, and she wasn’t locked in a small room, but…”
"But," I realized something was wrong.
“But…” Alka looked conflicted, “because my sister was injured, she became dependent on medication. Sometimes my older brother couldn’t provide her with these medications, so she ended up with Kalto…”
He stopped there.
I covered my head, acutely aware that this was unlikely to end well. Just hearing that I was with Illumi and still dared to get entangled with Kaldor made me imagine what would happen to me.
They'll definitely die a horrible death.
"So, I never had a chance to survive...?" I asked weakly. "How many times did you and Killua try to save me that time?"
Aluka suddenly looked up in the direction of the clinic, then gave a look that was hard to describe.
“I remember now…” he said, “That person seems to be connected to my sister as well…”
Me: "...I know him, of course we're related!"
Aluka shook her head: "What I mean is, at least one of my sister's deaths was related to him."
“That time, my sister didn’t marry my brother. Instead, she disappeared with him,” Aluka said. “My brother was very angry and searched everywhere for you. He only found a note left by that man, saying that you were already married and that he was too late.”
I straightened my back and realized that Alluka had indeed experienced many "futures," and the story he was now reciting was the path that Hisoka and I almost took.
I am indeed preparing to abandon Illumi and be with Hisoka, not out of love, but I am indeed preparing to do so.
"And then what happened?" I'm more concerned about where this story is headed than about any other ending.
Alka: "..."
I:""
He wore an expression more complex than when he was telling the story of Illumi.
"No..." Then I heard him murmur, "Sister absolutely cannot marry that man again... Let's leave now! Let him die!"
I:""
What would happen if I were with Hisoka? Would it be even more terrifying than being with Illumi?
“No,” I said, “you have to tell me what happened before I can make a decision.”
“He’s dead,” Alluka said. “He was perfectly fine with my sister, but he had to go and provoke a terrible opponent… so my sister died with him! When he was alive, he always took my sister to do all sorts of messy and terrible things. My sister was more confused with him than with my older brother, more dizzy than when she was drugged by Killua, and she couldn’t recognize me or Killua at all.”
"...I see." I blinked. "Am I destined never to find a good man? How exactly did you manage to save me in the end?"
Alka blushed and awkwardly covered her face with her doll.
“…I got together with Killua.” He said, “Because my sister got together with Killua later, he stayed there, and we got separated. But my sister and brother were both very, very good to me back then…I’m so happy…”
"The wedding cake was delicious. The bouquet smelled wonderful too."
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