◎Know-nothing fool + netizens who will die of their sins◎
Finally, with the guidance of several aunts and sisters, Lu Ge was able to make a few acceptable rice dumplings.
Lu Ge, who was terribly despised, ended up being like a robot. No matter what the aunties and grannies said, he would only answer with "um" or "yes," because if you said a few more words, you would be greeted by hundreds of verbal battles from them.
After finally finishing wrapping the rice dumplings, Lu Ge was so numb that his eyes were dull.
However, before leaving, the aunties and grannies said to him, "Although you are not very good at making rice dumplings, as long as you are willing to learn, you can be our son-in-law." After saying that, the aunties and grannies left hand in hand.
Lu Ge, who stayed where he was, was badly hit. His face twitched and he cried out in his heart, "Thank you so much!" He didn't want to hear the word "son-in-law" again.
[Haha, this kid Ge Songsong has been played to pieces.]
[Lu Ge: Aunties and aunties change their expressions faster than the weather changes.]
Lin Chaojin and the others looked at him with great sympathy.
"It's okay, relax, life is unpredictable."
"Although you lost the Good Son-in-law Experience Card today, there will definitely be more Good Son-in-law Experience Cards in the future."
…
Lu Ge rolled his eyes. "Thank you. I don't need any of that comfort."
"Okay, after wrapping the rice dumplings, let's rush to the next task. The highlight of today is the dragon boat race," Director Zhang shouted, picking up his small loudspeaker.
Hearing about the dragon boat race, Lu Ge and the others looked at each other and said, "Director, you're not really going to let us row the dragon boat, are you?" That's a technical job, and if they were really asked to do it, they might not even be able to row the dragon boat.
"Yes and no," Director Zhang looked at them with a smile on his face and kept them in suspense, "You'll know in a moment."
Haha, looking at Director Zhang’s expression, it was obvious that they didn’t quite believe him.
When we arrived at the river where several villages converged, we saw two dragon boats parked on the river bank. These two dragon boats were much wider than the usual ones we saw. They could seat three people side by side and were equipped with railings and awnings.
It would be better to say it is a boat than a dragon boat.
"Director, this is what your dragon boat looks like. Don't take advantage of me because I've never seen the world," several people said.
"Who says it's not a dragon boat? It needs human power to row just like a dragon boat," Director Zhang said calmly.
"This is your focus, Director Zhang."
"Alright, the boat isn't a dragon boat anymore," Director Zhang blurted out. Facing the scornful gazes of the crowd, Director Zhang remained calm and continued, "The four of you will split into two groups and compete. Whoever's dragon boat crosses the red ribbon first wins."
Everyone looked in the direction Director Zhang pointed at the red ribbon. The two ends of the red ribbon were tied to the trees on both sides of the river. The two dragon boats were about a hundred meters away from it.
"It doesn't look very far," Lu Ge pondered for a moment, "If we try our best to row over there, we can."
But Director Zhang clearly didn't want them to have it easy. He looked at them and said, "For the sake of fairness, we're dividing the groups by drawing lots. However," his gaze lingered on Xiao Long and Yan Sinou for a second before he continued, "It might be unfair to be divided into two groups with such a huge difference in physical strength."
After he finished speaking, everyone compared the physiques of Xiao Long and Yan Sinuo. Xiao Long's physique was enough to match that of two Yan Sinuo, while Lu Ge and Chi Huai were of similar build. If one of them was in a group with Yan Sinuo, and the other group was in a group with Xiao Long, it would obviously not be fair to the other group.
Director Zhang had obviously considered this beforehand. He pointed to the eight men in black standing nearby and said, "So this time, you won't be rowing the dragon boats. Instead, we'll assign four men in black to each boat to row."
"No, Director Zhang, you are so kind, why don't we believe you? Is there any trap waiting for us?" Several people knew the director's routine very well, so they didn't fall for his tricks.
"Of course, whether the men in black move or not, and whether or not we row the dragon boats, depends on your performance," Director Zhang said quietly, "They are just tools that follow orders."
"We know it."
"The starting condition is that you play the game 'You Say, I Guess'. Every time you guess a question correctly, the man in black will slide ten meters as instructed. But if you keep guessing incorrectly, the man in black will stay still. The group that reaches the finish line first based on the number of answers wins," Director Zhang said without taking a breath.
"You are indeed Director Zhang."
"Okay, come and draw lots. Those who draw black lots will be in one group, and those who draw white lots will be in another group," Director Zhang instructed Assistant Li to bring up a box and hand it to them, asking them to draw lots one by one.
In the end, Lin Chaojin and Lu Ge were in a group with Chi Ling and Chi Huai, while Xiao Chuchu and Xiao Long were in a group with Yan Sinuo and Yan Ruo.
"Then do you have anything harsh to say to each other?" Director Zhang said as he watched the eight of them and added fuel to the fire.
"Yes," the eight of them turned to Director Zhang in unison and said in unison, "Director Zhang, you're amazing."
Director Zhang's face twitched when he heard this. So I am your enemy, right?
[Haha, Director Zhang, why are you doing this? You're annoying people without even realizing it.]
[Director Zhang: A bunch of bastards.]
Lin Chaojin and others put on their life jackets and got on the boat. After they got on, the two boats were rowed by the men in black to the starting line and placed side by side at a distance.
At this time, the staff on the boat handed them a pair of headphones and a cardboard cover, and asked, "Who of you wants to say it and who wants to guess it?"
"Let me guess first," Lu Ge raised his hand first, eager to try, "Believe me, my brain works quickly."
As soon as he finished speaking, the staff member who was about to hand the headphones to him shook his hand and the headphones almost fell to the ground. Lin Chaojin, Chi Ling and Chi Huai seemed not to hear anything and silently looked away.
[Haha, Ge Songsong said he was quick-witted and scared the clam. The staff were all trembling with fear. Young man, you are so bold.]
[Covering my face, brother, please stop talking. You said this without blushing or beating your heart, but we fans have to be proud too, dog head.]
[Ahem, let me make it clear first: the idols' words and flags are not directed at the fans. Asking them is just a matter of shame. Light a cigarette.]
Lu Ge put on the headphones, took them off after a while, and rubbed his ears. "The volume of these headphones is too loud. I almost went deaf."
"It has to be loud to prevent you from hearing it," the staff member said calmly.
Lin Chaojin glanced at Lu Ge and said, "Then let me speak first."
"Okay," Chi Ling nodded without objection, and Chi Huai looked at her and nodded in agreement.
"Okay, as a brother and sister, we are invincible," Lu Ge raised his eyebrows and said confidently.
Lin Chaojin glanced at him calmly and said, "Shut up and stop talking nonsense."
"Okay, okay, I'll shut up now," Lu Ge put on his headphones quickly and said, "Okay, I've put on my headphones, let's start, ho ho ho ho, live live live live..." As he said that, he couldn't help but get excited and dance along with the music in his headphones.
"Pa," Lin Chaojin used the cardboard in Chi Ling's hand to give Lu Ge a veil.
"Oh," Lu Ge touched his ear, met his sister's unfriendly eyes, and shuddered to admit his mistake. "The song was too exciting and I couldn't help it. Now I'm serious."
"You'd better," Lin Chaojin said lightly, handed the cardboard back to Chi Ling, and sat down opposite Lu Ge.
[Ge Songsong is really naughty. I suddenly feel that the young lady must be extremely tired.]
[Haha, Ge Songsong is really a jerk who will tear down the roof if he is not punished for three days.]
Seeing that they were ready, Chi Ling took the cardboard and began to open the first page. There were only two words on it: Meng Dan.
Lin Chaojin held up two fingers to Lu Ge, "Two words."
"Yeah, I know what it means," Lu Ge nodded, holding the headphones with both hands.
Seeing that he was seriously getting into the moment, Lin Chaojin relaxed her expression and continued, "A character from a TV series."
"Chainsaw?" Lu Ge frowned, suddenly looked terrified, and raised his voice, "Chainsaw Killer."
"No," Lin Chaojin shook her head, and after a moment's reflection, she said, "Princess Huanzhu, Ziwei."
Lu Ge's body moved left and right like a worm. "What what what brother, since what, since... cough cough, sister, can you say these two words?"
Lu Ge's face flushed red from choking on his own saliva. He didn't even bother to pat his chest. He looked terrified, as if he had seen a ghost. "Is that something we can say on the show? This isn't an adult channel, is it?"
"Ahem," Director Zhang, who was sitting in front of the monitor, was originally sipping his tea leisurely. Upon hearing this, he choked. Only after Assistant Li patted him on the back did he recover. He pointed at the camera and said angrily, "We don't do this kind of thing on our show. This kid Lu Ge is ruining the reputation of our show."
[What, sister, I'm a little confused. This car is going a little too fast, cough cough.]
[Mr. Ge is worthy of you. You want to catch people off guard.]
[Everyone get in the car, the doors are welded shut!]
[Hh, I wonder what Director Zhang thought when he heard this. Director Zhang was furious: "Lu Ge, you stinky boy, stop ruining my reputation."]
[No, what are you talking about? I don’t quite understand.]
[Ahem, watch out there, there are minors here. But I'm getting on the bus first.]
As soon as he finished speaking, "bang," Lu Ge felt an object opposite him hit his face accurately. Before he could defend himself, his head was hit again with a "bang". He was suddenly in a panic and didn't know where the pain was. In the end, he could only hug himself with both hands, howled "Ah", and cried.
Lu Ge took off his headphones and looked at Lin Chaojin calmly who threw the lifebuoy to him with a resentful look, and then looked at Chi Huai who calmly withdrew his hand and handed the cardboard back to Chi Ling. He pursed his lips and said, "No, why are you two hitting me together?" Lu Ge rubbed his head and touched his face aggrievedly.
"Heh," Lin Chaojin and Chi Huai glanced at him with faint disdain.
Lu Ge shifted his body. Being attacked from both sides, no one came to his rescue. He could only put on his headphones again with a wronged look on his face. "If it's not true, then it's not true. Who told you that the two words you said have homophones?" He could only mutter the last sentence in a low voice.
[Haha, I can't stop laughing. Ge Songsong is being attacked from both sides. Is this the legendary mixed doubles?]
[Ah, sisters, don't go ahead, mixed doubles, parents mixed doubles, etc. I'm hooked! The reserved CP is real!]
[Hh, then Lu Ge is the eldest son, Ge Songsong should start calling them dad and mom.]
Lin Chaojin touched another swimming ring and said gently, "Let's continue."
Lu Ge sat up straight after seeing her action, "I will be serious this time."
Lin Chaojin glanced at him, thought for a moment, and then said, "There's a word to describe him."
"Pa," Lu Ge clapped his hands and said happily, "I understand the lip movements of this sentence. There is a saying to describe him."
"Yes," Lin Chaojin nodded and took his hand off the lifebuoy.
Seeing her actions, Lu Ge couldn't help but feel proud again, "See, I'm awesome, quick, what's the next sentence?"
Lin Chaojin moved her fingers, then held back and continued, "The words are 'You are the wind.'"
"You, you are crazy," Lu Ge guessed his sister's mouth shape and spoke tremblingly.
"Yes, but it's you," Lin Chaojin nodded.
Seeing her nod, Lu Ge became even more suspicious. "Okay, I'm crazy, what else?"
"I am sand," Lin Chaojin continued with the next sentence.
"Ahem, sister, are you sure?" Lu Ge looked at her with a face full of doubt.
"Is there any problem?" Lin Chaojin frowned and said indifferently.
"No, no," Lu Ge waved his hands repeatedly, shifted his body, and emphasized again, "You asked me to say this, 'You are crazy, I am a fool', right? No," Lu Ge couldn't help but raise his voice, "Sister, even if you say I am a fool, how can you say you are crazy? It's not that we..."
"Pa," before he could finish his words, another lifebuoy appeared on his face.
"I, I didn't say anything wrong," Lu Ge took off his headphones and said aggrievedly, "I just want to see what those two words are."
As he spoke, Lu Ge turned around and looked at the cardboard, "Meng Dan, Meng Dan, ah, from the Princess Return of the Condor Heroes, you are the wind and I am the sand," and he couldn't help but started singing. Halfway through the song, he turned around again and looked at Lin Chaojin, who was looking at him with her arms folded and a dull look in her eyes.
Lu Ge received her gaze, his eyes flickering up and down, "These two sentences are quite similar, haha, don't you think so?"
However, the three people on the boat just looked at him quietly. Lu Ge touched his nose awkwardly and said, "I won't do it again next time. I promise." His words were as sincere as they could be.
[Haha, what a joker this is! Ge Suengsong is so bold! He even dares to call his sister a lunatic. He is so bold!]
[This Bo Ge is a coward and deserves to be beaten. God damn, it's because he is a fool. No, your understanding is quite clear.]
[I laughed so hard my mom was about to come in and hit me, but I guess I can watch Missy and Ge Suangsong play together all day. I beg Director Zhang to let them play for a day.]
[The sister in front took me along, hah, they are really good with rice.]
In this group, Xiao Chuchu and Xiao Long were the first to go on stage. Xiao Chuchu was responsible for gesturing, and Xiao Long was responsible for guessing.
Xiao Chuchu glanced at the word board in Yan Ru's hand and began to gesture to her brother, "Four words, the kids love to see them."
"Ok, four words," Xiao Long gestured to show that he understood.
"And then," Xiao Chuchu couldn't think of any other adjectives at once, and couldn't help but stand up, put her hand on her nose, and pressed it in hard until her nostrils were about to show, and then a "humming" sound came out of her mouth.
[She covers her face. "No, Chu Bao, my dear daughter, you don't have to work so hard. Do you still want to maintain your celebrity image?"
[Haha, Chu Bao really tried his best, but the true fans have already taken screenshots and ran away with the pot lid.]
[You’re a fake fan, no, take a screenshot and send it to me!]
"Ah, I see." Xiao Long's eyes lit up when he saw his sister's actions. He slapped his forehead and said, "Zhu Bajie, right?"
Xiao Chuchu stomped her feet in anger and put down her hands, "It's not Zhu Bajie, what Zhu Bajie, it's four words," she said while holding up four fingers.
Xiao Long saw the four fingers and scratched his head. "Let me think about it. Four words, not Zhu Bajie, Zhu Bajie. Ah, I get it."
"What," Xiao Chuchu stood there quietly, looking up at her brother, "What is it?" Seeing him keep talking about Zhu Bajie, she no longer had any hope, although that was also a kind of pig.
"Marshal Tianpeng," Xiao Long shouted excitedly.
"Marshal Tianpeng," Xiao Chuchu spoke along with her brother, her voice smooth and even.
"It really is Marshal Tianpeng, I guessed it right," Xiao Long said happily when he saw Xiao Chuchu's lip shape.
Xiao Chuchu rolled her eyes in exasperation and said, "It's not Marshal Tianpeng," and shook her head violently.
"Look," Xiao Chuchu exhaled, thought for a moment, then her eyes lit up and she said, "Step on the mud."
He waved his hands and stepped up and down on the planks, saying loudly, "Step on the mud."
Xiao Long looked at the man who was dancing with his hands and feet like a gorilla. His face twitched and he fell silent. He didn't know what this thing was.
[……]
Netizens and fans in front of the camera were also silent for a moment when they saw Xiao Chuchu's uncoordinated movements.
It took a while before barrages of comments began to appear.
[This beautiful movement, no, I can’t praise it enough, what is this thing?]
[My expression right now is the same pained expression as Big Brother Xiao. Chu Bao's robot reincarnation is confirmed.]
[The robot in front of me can at least do the robot dance. Even Chu Bao, even the god of dance, is inferior to it.]
[Haha, I'm the only one wondering what these two would come up with if Lu Ge guessed and Xiao Chuchu gestured.]
[Sisters in front, don't go. You're frightening me. The scene is too beautiful to imagine.]
Xiao Long took off his headphones with a sad expression and said carefully, "Sister, why don't we skip this question?"
Xiao Chuchu waved her hands tiredly after hearing this. "Come on, I don't expect you to be that smart, brother." She looked at him with disdain. "You can't even guess something as cute as Peppa Pig."
Xiao Long was filled with questions. Yes, Peppa Pig is cute, but your performance is scary, okay? However, Xiao Long didn't dare to say this out loud.
Here, Lu Ge was pushed away by Lin Chaojin and the other two in disgust, and turned to get the cardboard.
After Lin Chaojin and Chi Ling guessed for a round, the boat moved forward fifty meters, and the boat on the opposite side followed closely behind them, with only ten meters between the two boats.
"Okay, next brother Huai, guess who will say it then," Lu Ge had already accepted his fate and dutifully did his job of holding the cardboard, "Chi Ling, do you want to say that?"
Chi Ling glanced at Lin Chaojin and her brother, her eyes rolling, "No, my throat isn't feeling well today," she said, looking at Lin Chaojin embarrassedly, "Sister Chaojin, thank you for your help."
"It's okay," Lin Chaojin replied, "Your throat is uncomfortable, so I'll take care of it."
"Yeah," Chi Ling pinched his ear uncomfortably and nodded.
"Okay, let's get started," Lu Ge said, holding the cardboard, his voice full of morale. "You are the ones shouldering the mission of the entire boat, including the big brother in black rowing the boat. Big brothers, right? Otherwise, rowing will be boring and uninteresting."
The four big brothers in black he mentioned sat upright and motionless at the bow and stern of the boat, without any response to his words, and their whole bodies exuded the expression: I don’t know you, don’t bother me.
"Okay," Lu Ge touched his nose and turned to meet three pairs of disgusted eyes.
"Why do you talk so much nonsense?"
"Okay," Lu Ge made a zipper-locking mouth gesture, picked up the cardboard and opened the first page.
Lin Chaojin glanced at the cardboard, and her eyes met the man opposite her, who was looking straight at her without dodging or avoiding, with a fair and upright gaze.
Lin Chaojin tucked the loose hair behind her ears and said, "Two words, a place to smoke..."
"Rooftop," Chi Huai said lightly with his thin lips raised before he finished speaking.
"Damn, Brother Huai, you're really good. You guessed it before my sister even finished speaking," Lu Ge stood behind him and couldn't help but reached out and patted his back hard.
Lin Chaojin gave Chi Huai an OK gesture without changing her expression, then looked at the next piece of paper and raised her eyes, "Drive on Route 66..."
"Porsche 918," Chi Huai's eyes were fixed on her opening and closing lips, and his voice was without hesitation.
"Brother Huai, you are really my god," Lu Ge couldn't help but smile with all eight teeth showing, and reached out to pat his shoulder hard again, his admiration surging like a river.
And now Chi Ling on the side was looking between Lin Chaojin and her brother, and then glanced at the camera secretly, almost unable to control his expression. These two people.
At this time, the barrage was full of exclamations.
[These two are so smart! Huai Shen reacts so quickly.]
[As expected of these two people with high IQs.]
And some barrages have deviated from the direction.
[No, I'm the only one who doesn't understand how Huai Shen guessed it. The information the young lady gave was very little! Am I crazy?]
[Ahem, am I the only one who feels like there's something off about these two? Listen, what's the connection between the information they gave and the answer? I'm not a good student, so please don't lie to me.]
[Ahhh, the reserved sisters are gathering! Big sugar! Aaaaaaaaaa! I'm going crazy.]
And then, Lu Ge continued to turn to the next page.
Then Chi Ling standing aside and the netizens in front of the camera watched the two of them go back and forth with dull eyes.
"A dish..."
"Sweet and sour pork ribs."
"An English song..."
“California Dreaming.”
"A movie..."
"La La Land"
…
Chi Ling covered her face: ...
Netizens’ comments: …
As Lu Ge watched his group's boat cross the red ribbon first, he couldn't help but wave the cardboard with joy. He turned around and excitedly said to Lin Chaojin and Chi Huai, "Hahaha, sister, brother Huai, we won. You two are really amazing."
Chi Ling looked at Lu Ge's silly smile and her face twitched. Forget it, just let him continue to smile silly.
The netizens in front of the camera were screaming with excitement at this time.
[I'm really going to swear on my life that these two are nothing. I'll let you kick my head like a ball!]
[The sisters in front may not be so serious, but I also want to scream, these two must be having an affair!]
[Damn, this is clearly throwing candy in our faces!]
[Ahem, are these two planning to be frank? I have high blood sugar recently and can't eat too much sugar.]
[Lin Chaojin and Chi Huai: Did we say anything? Everything is just your netizens' guesses, you idiots.]
[Am I the only one who pities Ge Suangsong, who is still laughing foolishly and knows nothing? No, Ge is a fool.]
In the dormitory of XX University, Xiaomi screamed "Ah!", stood up and danced with three other roommates, singing and dancing, "The reserved couple is real, I'm hooked."
"Yes, the reserved CP is real," the other three roommates who had been brought into the reserved CP by Xiaomi nodded in agreement.
"No, I'm going to post on Weibo to inform others who didn't get to watch the live broadcast, so that they can beat themselves to death," Xiaomi said as he took out his mobile phone, edited the clip he had just recorded and posted it on Weibo.
@Are Lin Chaojin and Chi Huai together?: Damn it, damn it, damn it! Sisters! Super sweet! Here comes the ultimate sweetener! Look at Missy and Huai Shen's guessing game, it's amazing, these two are so brazen and unafraid. I just wonder why the smoking place is the rooftop! And how come Route 66 is just a Porsche 918? Are other sports cars unworthy of running on Route 66? You idiot. And you think of sweet and sour pork ribs for a dish, and "California Dreaming" for a song (PS: This song is a bit popular on NetEase Cloud Music, but it's definitely not well-known, and it's an English song). Forget it, you said the movie was "La La Land," I'll accept that, it's really famous after all, idiot.
[I came and watched it, I was so sweet.]
[Help, help! I'm having a terrible sleep. Please keep this pace from now on!]
[Did you notice, at the start of the game, when Huai Shen's gaze was fixed on the young lady's face, she flipped her hair! Flipping her hair! This action in front of the opposite sex means that you are interested in the other person psychologically.]
[Yes, I noticed that too. And Huai Shen, could you please calm down a little? Stop staring. He hasn't taken his eyes off the young lady for several minutes. And I counted, this man's throat moved eleven times in those few minutes!]
[I'm so numb. After watching the video and everyone's analysis, I want to announce to my mom that my couple is getting married.]
The author has something to say:
Thank you to the little angels who voted for me or provided me with nutrient solution between 2022-06-21 23:57:07 and 2022-06-22 23:53:15~
Thanks to the little angel who irrigated the nutrient solution: I don’t want to name the 3 bottles;
Thank you very much for your support. I will continue to work hard!
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