Li Miaomiao felt that she was unlucky this year. Every person she met was a pervert. When she returned home, her father and mother didn't love her, and her younger brother didn't care about her.
Li Miaomiao locked the door from the inside, took out a pen and paper, and began to write a suicide note, as if someone had sent her a message two minutes ago asking her to lock the door, and she was now afraid to lock it.
I recall when I was 14 years old, I was playing games at home alone. I met a guy in the game, added him on QQ, and he said, "Let's talk about sex."
Li Miaomiao was scared, but she didn't dare to delete the man. She didn't dare to tell anyone about it because if she did, someone would always say to her, "Who told you not to delete him?"
"I see you're quite happy to talk to him."
"Respect, blessing, lock."
"Zhou Yu only beat Huang Gai. If you agreed, he can't rape you if you refuse."
When Li Miaomiao thought of these words, she felt very painful. She was a girl who had been denied since childhood. She was not pretty, her academic performance was not particularly good, and she was very inferior.
This girl with low self-esteem was afraid of everyone she saw. When a man talked to her about sex for the first time, Li Miaomiao, who had never received sex education, was at a loss.
She still gets a headache when she thinks about it now, so she mustered up the courage to write this down.
The boy said, "Lock the door and touch yourself. I'll teach you how to masturbate. It's very comfortable."
At that age, Li Miaomiao didn’t know that this was called sexual harassment. She was just scared. She didn’t reply, but the man kept sending messages.
"Are you there? Can't you take the initiative? You have no interest in sex at all? Have you not developed yet? Logically speaking, you should have developed by the time you are 14."
Li Miaomiao felt a headache. She paused for a moment, turned the page, and started writing other content on another page.
Li Miaomiao also wrote about how An Qianqian hated her and how she falsely accused her of stealing her things.
Zhang Xue called herself a pervert and falsely accused herself of soiling her clothes, demanding that she either pay her a thousand yuan or cut off her right hand as compensation.
How the boys in the class pinned her to the ground and beat her, and how they attracted pretty girls by spitting on her.
Thinking of these bullies, Li Miaomiao endured the headache while crying and finished writing.
She turned another page.
The problems encountered in the workplace are even more serious. When she first met Li Yanan and learned that she and she were from the same hometown, she was so excited.
I recalled how scared I was at the time when my perverted boss was following me and installed a surveillance camera in the toilet to watch me playing Happy Candy Crush.
I thought about the New Year that just passed, when my 12-year-old sister was sexually harassed, bullied by boys, and slandered by teachers.
An unreasonable aunt, a nasty cousin, a cowardly, incompetent and self-defeating mother, and a father and younger brother who stay out of the matter.
And Bai Xiaoxiao, my roommate who I had only lived with for a short time, seemed to have drained my body.
Fortunately, I have a gentle and warm-hearted best friend like Jiang Yin, but this best friend is beautiful, popular, and has a boyfriend who loves her. I am not jealous, but I feel inferior.
And so on and so forth.
Li Miaomiao finally finished writing. She closed the notebook and didn’t expect that there was so much content in this suicide note.
It was late at night, and she didn't care about Bai Xiaoxiao today. Bai Xiaoxiao was making love with a boy in her bed at this moment.
Li Miaomiao went into the bathroom, took a shower, returned to her room, and put on a dress that she thought was beautiful.
I opened the cosmetics box that I hadn't opened for a long time and started putting on makeup. My hands were already unfamiliar with it.
Recalling that she had been depressed for a period of time during college, she was so depressed that she wanted to commit suicide and almost jumped off the building. Then a boy said:
"Girls shouldn't be obsessed with beauty. Jumping off a building would be so ugly. Really? You probably don't care about beauty with the way you look. Even Yang Guang had to clean himself up when he committed suicide. No wonder you look like this."
She didn't want to think too much about it now. She took out her fruit knife, sat on the ground, and cut her wrist hard.
She was in pain, but her heart hurt even more. Bright red blood flowed out. She leaned on the bed and gradually lost consciousness.
When Li Miaomiao woke up again, she was lying on a hospital bed with pain in her wrist, and Jiang Yin was accompanying her.
It turned out that Jiang Yin was afraid that something was wrong with Li Miaomiao, so she had a nightmare that night, dreaming that Li Miaomiao died quietly.
Jiang Yin ran to Li Miaomiao's rental house early in the morning and knocked on the door anxiously.
"Who is this? Is there something wrong with you? You won't let me sleep so early in the morning." Bai Xiaoxiao vomited and continued to sleep.
Jiang Yin was still knocking on the door. The male colleague who was with Bai Xiaoxiao got up and opened the door. Jiang Yin didn't even look at him and rushed to Li Miaomiao's room. The door couldn't be opened and no one answered her calls.
"Jiang Yin, you're sick. You're worthy of being Li Miaomiao's best friend. You like to disturb other people's sleep. You have such a good relationship, why don't you live together?" Bai Xiaoxiao walked out.
Jiang Yin ignored her and called Qu Jing: "Qu Jing, go find a locksmith and open Miaomiao's door quickly."
"Psycho." Bai Xiaoxiao cursed. The male colleague felt something was wrong and covered her mouth.
After a while, the locksmith came and Li Miaomiao's door was opened. Li Miaomiao was already lying on the ground, with blood staining her white clothes and also flowing on the ground.
Qu Jing picked up Li Miaomiao, and Jiang Yin followed, taking her to the hospital. They only cared about Li Miaomiao and ignored the pen and notebook on her desk.
The notebook was picked up by Bai Xiaoxiao.
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