Chapter 48 Two-in-one Song Zhiqing is also crazy. Her family is cooking shit today...
The others scattered like birds and beasts, but Zhao Weimin couldn't run away.
His face turned red and then white, white and then blue, purple and green, just as if all the waste water from a dye room had been poured onto his big black square face, and all the colors were having a lively meeting.
Wu Jianguo, who was trapped on the ground, was still making a fuss: "How dare you treat me, the king of octopuses, like this! You are being disrespectful!"
He was so fragile that he seemed to be broken at any moment. He looked at Grandma Sun with great sorrow: "Mother..."
"Get out of here!" Mrs. Sun jumped up on the spot. "I told you that you shouldn't marry an educated youth. You married such a disaster. You can only blame yourself!"
He turned his gaze to Chen Guifen who had followed him: "Sister-in-law..."
Chen Guifen, who had been slapped several times on the face and followed just to see what happened to this crazy woman, said: "Pah!"
This cry was so loud from the bottom of her heart that Wu Jianguo on the ground heard it. He raised his head nimbly like a snake, his eyes shining: "Sister-in-law!"
Chen Guifen was so frightened of this person that she didn't dare to respond directly: "...?"
Wu Jianguo was like a tapeworm, struggling to get closer: "Sister-in-law, sister-in-law, I helped you with the work, too. Anyway, my elder brother has gone too, I feel sorry for you..."
Zhao Weimin finally couldn't hold it anymore. He collapsed and pulled off his coat and stuffed it into Wu Jianguo's mouth: "Ahhh, shut up! Shut up!!!"
Wu Jianguo: “Mmmmm!”
The huge potential of social death burst out. Zhao Weimin carried Wu Jianguo on his shoulders and threw him over. He nodded weakly and smiled at the crowd: "I, I..."
He choked with a sob.
"I'll take Ye Xiang to ask Old Wang to borrow the ox cart."
The onlookers silently made way for the vehicle.
Under such a spotlight, Zhao Weimin became even more shaky. He was a dark and strong man, but now he looked like Lin Daiyu who was about to cry.
Wu Jianguo, who was carried face down on his shoulder, twisted left and right but was held down. He wanted to bite his mouth but the cloth was stuffed tightly into his mouth. He arched his waist in anger and hit his forehead hard on Zhao Weimin's chest.
Zhao Weimin groaned when he was pushed, but he continued to stride forward firmly.
Wu Jianguo: “Boom boom boom—boom!”
He had already eaten poisonous fungi, and being able to be so excited for so long was already an overdraft. Then he was hit several times in a row, and the last hit was too forceful, and finally his eyes rolled back and he passed out.
His neck and hands drooped, which scared the people around him.
"Shit, is this not the poison of the mushrooms that killed him?"
"Broken your neck?"
"If this gets out, our Dongfeng Squadron will be disgraced."
"It's embarrassing enough right now."
Grandma Sun trembled as she came closer to take a look, breathed a sigh of relief, then angrily stood with her hands on her hips and yelled at the onlookers, "What the hell are you talking about? He just fainted!"
Wu Jianguo is a really troublesome person. Even after he fainted, he was still told "just". The most important thing is that the onlookers didn't think there was anything wrong and kept saying:
"Just fainted, that's all. Send her over quickly."
"Yes, yes, yes, calm down now, or there will be more noise later."
Zhao Weimin's eyes were filled with tears: "Okay, okay."
"Mom, don't leave yet. Give me some money."
"Money, money, money!" Mrs. Sun cursed as she fished out a patched cloth bag from her waistband. Just as she was about to open it, her hand suddenly tightened. "No, I want to go with you. I want to see how much money this damn bitch wants from me!"
Zhao Weimin was exhausted both physically and mentally at this moment, and he didn't have the energy to object.
The two gradually walked away, leaving only Chen Guifen standing at the door of Widow Bai's house.
But she couldn't stand the vague gazes of the crowd, so she covered her face and ran away.
The White Widow, who suffered the most, could no longer maintain her previous well-behaved image. She sobbed, slammed the door shut, and hid inside to heal herself.
Woohoo, it will take her a lifetime to heal the hurt she suffered today!
Several parties involved left or dispersed or hid, but the enthusiasm of the remaining villagers was not affected at all. They didn't even move, but gathered at the door of the White Widow's house and started talking loudly.
"I didn't expect it. I'm already so old, and this is the first time I've seen anything like this!"
"What kind of mushroom is this? It's poisonous. This is too scary."
"That's not the case. It's just like drinking. No matter how drunk you are, if you don't have that intention, you'll just fall asleep. I think that's your true nature being exposed."
"Oh, you mean Weimin's wife, she...?"
"I was wondering why she was willing to fetch water for the White Widow before!"
"But she's married to Weimin! This, this is too much."
"Doesn't the country advocate monogamy? Isn't there something missing?"
"Ah... is that what monogamy means?"
"Then we don't know. Ask the educated youth. They are educated people from the city and they must know more."
As they were talking, everyone's eyes were fixed on Han Zhenzhen and Song Ruan who were watching the fun, with eager light in their eyes.
Song Ruan felt a tingling sensation on her scalp and she quietly pushed Han Zhenzhen forward - I'm sorry, sister!
Han Zhenzhen, who was watching with fascination, was suddenly pushed forward and staggered two steps, exposing herself to the sight of the villagers.
Everyone's eyes lit up.
"Xiao Han Zhiqing, do you think monogamy is done this way?"
"Ah, this, I, I'm preaching," Han Zhenzhen stammered, "but, but it shouldn't be like this, right? I've seen it too."
"Well, it seems that you city people are not much more knowledgeable than us peasants."
The man who spoke clicked his tongue and shook his head, looking very regretful.
Being well-informed about this kind of thing, that's the problem.
Han Zhenzhen puffed up her lips like a frog but was too embarrassed to say it out loud - since she joined the Dongfeng Brigade, her experience has indeed broadened.
#I often feel out of tune with you because I am too conservative
Everyone came to watch the fun, talking and pointing fingers, some even followed quietly - they had nothing to do anyway.
Han Zhenzhen didn't follow, she was still thinking about the pheasant left in Song Ruan's yard!
After watching enough of the excitement, it’s time to eat.
Han Zhenzhen, who was walking on the road, was still terrified: "Fortunately, I asked her to take the mushroom."
She didn't even dare to think, if it was her who was eaten, would she still have the face to live in this world!
"Are you not going to settle the score with the person who stole your mushrooms?"
Han Zhenzhen shook her head like a rattle: "Forget it, forget it. Ye Xiang...it's not easy for her either."
I don’t know how to face it after I wake up.
Han Zhenzhen didn't even dare to put herself in the other person's shoes. Her scalp went numb at the slightest thought.
The little donkey following behind them was no longer as energetic as when it was watching the fun. It walked with a limp and stumbled with every step. It hummed from time to time and even its ears drooped. It looked so pitiful.
Song Ruan understood at a glance that this was because he had just run too fast and now his legs were hurting. She walked up to the donkey and picked it up in a bad mood: "I raised a thing like you, and it's a pity. When your legs are healed, if you don't carry me, I will twist your head off."
The donkey leaned obediently in her arms, his ears moving leisurely.
Song Ruan was so angry that she cursed: "You just want to join in the fun. You want to watch it even if you have a lame leg! Do you understand what people are doing? You just join in. I think I should name you Good Deed!" Han Zhenzhen rubbed her arms uncomfortably: "Song Ruan, you scold it like this, don't you feel like you are scolding yourself?"
They had just finished watching the fun and were on their way back.
Song Ruan looked up in surprise: "How is that possible? I am thick-skinned."
Han Zhenzhen: …
"Stop talking."
Back in the yard, Song Ruan put Haoshi back into the donkey shed to let it lie down and rest, then carried the pheasant and mushrooms to the kitchen.
Han Zhenzhen suggested with lingering fear: "Song Ruan, I'll go clean up the pheasant, and you go pick some mushrooms. I really can't tell if they are poisonous or not. Don't let us end up eating like this."
That's too scary.
Song Ruan readily agreed - no matter how shameless she was, she couldn't withstand such a level of social death.
Even the sperm-repelling system in her mind was scanned extremely carefully, and there was communication between their systems. If it were to get out that its host was going crazy like shitting in public, would it still have any shame?
I scanned it three or four times, even using my internal VIP privileges. It sang
【Three meals a day, four seasons, healthy~~】
Song Ruan felt relieved and started to pick the mushrooms.
They picked a lot of mushrooms and there was also a chicken. If they stewed them all, they would definitely not be able to finish them. Instead of having a hodgepodge of leftovers the next day, it would be better to cook less at the beginning so that they could have fresh food for the next meal.
Although the times were hard, she still wanted to enjoy her mouth to the greatest extent possible.
A man lives by his mouth.
If the mushrooms are not eaten immediately, they cannot be washed. First, the grass and leaf debris on the cap must be picked off, and then the dirt on the root of the mushroom must be picked off. She also found a small brush to brush off the loose soil, intending to dry them all in a dustpan later.
Dry brushing produced a lot of dust, which made her cough.
Han Zhenzhen over there was plucking chicken feathers. The tiny fluff floated up from time to time, stimulating her so much that she kept making “qiu qiu” sounds.
Two people stood back to back, one coughed, coughed, coughed, and the other sneezed. Although they didn't say a word, there was an inexplicable sense of security that they were communicating all the time.
After scooping two scoops of water from the water tank and pouring it into the basin, Song Ruan was washing the mushrooms for this meal. Suddenly, his eyes lit up: "I think we can make a mushroom chicken sauce. You can take half back to the educated youth camp. If you have no appetite or the dishes ordered by the educated youth are too bad, you can secretly dig some to eat."
Han Zhenzhen raised her head from the flying chicken feathers: "It sounds good, but I can't do it."
Song Ruan searched for "Mushroom Chicken Sauce Recipe" in the system mall, and said confidently: "I can do it!"
Making sauce is such a simple thing. Just add some seasonings and stir-fry them into a paste. As long as there is no water or oil in the jar, it will most likely not go bad. As for the taste, as long as she is willing to add more seasonings and oil, even fried shoe soles will be delicious. Why should she be afraid of this?
"Wow!" Han Zhenzhen's eyes were full of stars. "You are really amazing!"
Song Ruan puffed out her chest after being praised: "That's right! As for cooking, I am still good at it!"
She excitedly rushed to the kitchen and took out a jar: "I'll show you something good!"
Han Zhenzhen poked her head out curiously: "What is this?"
"Ding ding ding ~ I pickled the bamboo shoots you gave me and made them into sour bamboo shoots. They should be ready now!"
Song Ruan excitedly opened the lid.
"Wow, that sounds great!"
Han Zhenzhen's family often cooks bamboo shoots, but they are usually dried and stewed with bacon. This is the first time I've heard that they can be made into sour bamboo shoots.
Sour bamboo shoots sound delicious and should be as tasty as sauerkraut.
She moved closer with anticipation.
Then she smelled a very... strange smell. How should she describe it? It was as if she was back home, in the hot summer, and the night soil collector happened to be sick, and she passed by a public toilet that hadn't been cleaned for two days... the feeling.
Han Zhenzhen:? ? ?
She looked at Song Ruan a little. The jar was so close to her nose, but her face was still full of confidence.
Did she smell it wrong?
Han Zhenzhen rubbed her nose, then leaned forward and took another big sip, not believing it.
"Yue!!!"
"What's that smell!!" She covered her nose in horror.
In the corner outside the house, Tiedan was sniffing with his black nose full of snot.
Every time Han Zhiqing came, there would be a delicious smell wafting from Song Ruan's house. However, these two women were stingy. They ate so well themselves but refused to share anything with him, a little kid. Every time, he could only stand at the wall, drooling and smelling, imagining the taste of the food.
I don’t know what I ate this time.
He took a sharp breath and paused.
? ? ? ?
Tiedan looked up to confirm that he was standing in the right place. Behind this wall was Song Ruan’s kitchen, not the toilet.
He took another deep breath in disbelief.
"Mom! Mom! Song Zhiqing has gone crazy too. Her family is cooking shit today!!!"
Because he was standing close to the corner of the wall, Tiedan's voice was transmitted very clearly into the yard.
Song Ruan: ...
Han Zhenzhen: …
She looked at Song Ruan silently.
It’s not nice to say this, but, but…
Thank you Tiedan.
She said what she dared not say.
Song Ruan's face turned pale: "Bullshit, what do you mean by boiled shit? This is sour bamboo shoots! Sour bamboo shoots! Most people can't pickle them to this flavor, this is strong enough, it's delicious when used to cook rice noodles or stir-fry!"
Han Zhenzhen nodded: "Ah...ah, haha."
Can you really eat this?
Don't believe it.
Seeing Han Zhenzhen's skeptical expression, Song Ruan felt deeply aggrieved for her own masterpiece: "You don't believe it? Really! I'll make you some fried chicken with sour bamboo shoots. You'll know when you try it. It's delicious!"
As she spoke, she reached out to take the chicken that Han Zhenzhen had already prepared.
I tried to pick it up, but it didn't move.
Han Zhenzhen was hesitant but determined not to let go: "I believe it, I believe it, let's eat chicken stewed with mushrooms, you see your mushrooms are soaked in water, it won't go bad."
Chicken is so rare that it can cause you such trouble?
She couldn't even imagine what fried chicken in a manure pit would taste like!
Han Zhenzhen held the chicken even tighter.
"Then give me the chicken offal. I'll make some stir-fried chicken offal with sour bamboo shoots. You can try it first. I guarantee it'll be delicious." Song Ruan had no choice but to take a step back.
Han Zhenzhen looked at her warily, her eyes wide open, like a cat guarding a mouse it had just caught.
Her resistance made Song Ruan want to promote the sour bamboo shoots even more.
"Have you heard of stinky tofu? The one that the big boss talked about, the one that smells stinky but tastes delicious. Sour bamboo shoots are actually the same thing!"
She tried to use celebrity as an example.
Han Zhenzhen was slightly shaken.
"Besides, you can see how I pickled it. The pickling water is clean and nothing else was added. What are you worried about?"
"Look at the color, it's so white and tender. It looks tender, crispy and chewy. It must taste good."
Seeing Han Zhenzhen's eyes were already a little blurry after being fooled, Song Ruan began to increase the intensity: "Oh, I can't help drooling just talking about it. Why don't we just fry the chicken offal and just fry half of it, stewing half with mushrooms and the other half with pickled bamboo shoots."
Han Zhenzhen: “!!!”
Most Chinese people have this kind of moderate quality - when you say you want to lift the roof, they agree to open the window.
"Fried chicken offal, fried chicken offal." She hurriedly picked up all the chicken offal and handed it over, not forgetting to instruct, "You have to clean it up, you have to clean it up."
If it's not cleaned properly, it will taste like fried shit.
The more Han Zhenzhen thought about it, the sadder she became. She felt that she had paid too much for her best friend's eccentric hobby.
Thinking of this, she stood up suddenly: No, there is only one pot, she has to stew the chicken now, otherwise what if Song Ruan stir-fries the shit and there is still a smell in the shit pot.
"The chicken needs to be stewed for a while longer. I'll use this pot first. Otherwise, after you fry the gizzards, they will get cold and won't taste good."
After she explained this, she quickly cleaned up the remaining chicken. Her hands and feet were so nimble that she rushed into the kitchen carrying the chicken, as if she was afraid that Song Ruan would catch up.
After a while, smoke began to rise from the kitchen chimney.
Song Ruan: Do you think I can't see that you are actually disgusted!
With some determination in her heart, Song Ruan vowed to give this country bumpkin who didn't believe her a little shock, so she cleaned the chicken offal very carefully, washed it with clean water, rubbed it with salt and wood ash, soaked it again, and finally cut it into slices.
First, take a piece of sour bamboo shoots out of the clay pot, slice them and wash them. Stir-fry them with ginger, garlic and chili in the pot. Then put the sour bamboo shoots that have been squeezed dry into the pot. With a sizzling sound, the flavor of the sour bamboo shoots rises in the pot along with the hot steam and the stimulating spicy taste.
Adding chicken offal will add a meaty aroma to the already rich taste.
While she was cooking, Han Zhenzhen was peeking over the side, wanting to say something but stopping herself from saying it again.
Song Ruan didn't look around, acted as if no one was around, turned a deaf ear to everything, and kept moving.
When she brought the stir-fried chicken gizzards with pickled bamboo shoots to the table, it was obvious that Han Zhenzhen sat up straight unconsciously, her cheeks twitched slightly, and the chopsticks she stretched out made an S-shaped curve with her as the center.
Seeing her shrinking and trembling look, Song Ruan picked up a piece and put it into her mouth without any good mood.
Han Zhenzhen couldn't help but hold her breath when she saw that Song Ruanzhen dared to put this strange-smelling thing into her mouth.
Song Ruan chewed and chewed, and thought that he had cooked it very well, so he added another piece with chopsticks.
Han Zhenzhen stopped eating with her chopsticks and stared at her with eyes wide open without blinking.
Song Ruan ate the food with a mouthful of vegetables and rice, and it was very delicious.
Han Zhenzhen was eager to try it but also a little worried: "Really, really delicious?"
Song Ruan glanced at her and said, "It's not delicious, don't eat it."
Han Zhenzhen felt even more itchy. She stretched out her chopsticks tremblingly, stared at the pickled bamboo shoots and chicken offal between the chopsticks like a squinting eye as they reached her mouth, and then she bit down with determination.
(Chew, chew, chew)
"This little thing is really delicious!" She opened her eyes wide in surprise and took another bite with her chopsticks.
Song Ruan, who succeeded in introducing the brand, was very proud: "Isn't it? I said it smells bad but tastes good, right?"
Han Zhenzhen: Awooo awooo!
"Mom! Smell it, am I right?" Tiedan dragged Chen Guifen to squat under the back wall, "Does it smell like shit?"
It happened to be windy, and this side was downwind, so Chen Guifen was choked by the odor: "Little calf, are you bored? Yue, this is not the kitchen, why is there such a smell?"
At this moment, Han Zhenzhen's vague voice floated out from the window: "It really just smells a little disgusting, but it tastes really good!"
Chen Guifen’s eyes suddenly opened: Today, her family lost an adult because of the damn Ye Xiang, but if word got out that the two educated youth cooked shit, wouldn’t they be less conspicuous?
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