Chapter 1
"Who else would make up someone like you? Call your boss out! We're here for a funeral! You made my old man look like this!"
"That's it! Give me your money back!"
The sound of men and women cursing came from the mourning hall. Su Yun frowned and walked faster. When he arrived outside the best hall in the funeral home, he first took a cautious look at the layout inside.
Wreaths – no problem!
Funeral hall decorations—no problem!
Staff attitude - very good!
If the guest gets angry, there must be something wrong with him!
Su Yun immediately held his head high and had the confidence not to return the money. He opened the black-faced folding fan with a swish and walked in gracefully, waving the fan: "Don't be angry, don't be angry, sir, ma'am, this is a qualified and legal funeral home with a business license. If you have any problems, you can complain normally and we will definitely solve any problems for you."
Suddenly, the guests who were surrounding the coffin and scolding the employees stopped and looked at the beautiful woman who walked in and the thin man behind her who had his head down and could not see his face clearly.
The woman had a beautiful and cold face, a pair of sparkling peach blossom eyes, and skin that was so white that it didn't look like a living person, but she wore a very eye-catching bright red lipstick. At first glance, what caught people's attention was not her beauty, but the conflicting colors on her face, which made her look as strange as a paper figure.
As for the man with his head down at the back, he was wearing the uniform of employees. The dark round-collar robe made in Ming Dynasty looked very large on him, giving people the feeling that he was terminally ill and about to die.
Among the employees present, only Su Yun was wearing a distinctive black Hanfu dress. The edges of the dress were embroidered with various incomprehensible patterns with gold thread. The employee uniforms were embroidered with patterns on the cuffs and hems with silver thread, and different words were embroidered on the chest. The man who came with Su Yun had a big "甸" on his chest, which looked like the head of a coffin.
The woman who was crying while holding the coffin asked Su Yun angrily, "Who are you? Who is in charge?"
"Excuse me, I'm the director of Xicheng Funeral Home. My last name is Su, Su Yun, also known as Caotou Su, Yun as in cloud. Nice to meet you..." Su Yun closed the folding fan, smiled and stretched out his hand to shake hands, but it was opened.
The man next to him was so angry that his eyes almost popped out of his head. He pointed at the coffin and asked, "Great! You are the director? Look! Your makeup artist did the makeup for my old man! We came to your crappy funeral home because of the old man's request! This is how you treat your customers!"
Su Yun poked his head out in confusion: "No, I have been a master for many years, her skills are--"
Before he could finish his words, Su Yun suddenly stopped and was choked by his saliva. The beautiful woman with the word "喜" embroidered on her chest hurried over to pat him on the back. The thin man with the word "甸" written on his chest found a thermos cup from somewhere and handed it to Su Yun.
The family members were shocked by the huge scene. The younger ones looked at it and murmured that this funeral home was weird from top to bottom, and the director coughed like a tuberculosis patient. No wonder no one wanted to come.
Su Yun was almost mad at her. She wasn't really choked, but she just didn't know how to finish her lies. She was just about to praise her makeup artist for her skills and said she was a veteran, but she ended up seeing her makeup artist doing a face that looked like a ghost marriage!
Weddings and funerals are most particular about rules. The slightest mistake may bring bad influence to the deceased. Fortunately, the funeral has not started yet. If it had started, Su Yun would have to bring the soul back and change it!
In a flash, Su Yun managed to find a solution. She thought about it, stopped coughing, and said, "This is actually because our master is a little old. This is... a style that was popular in the past. You know, we are an old... funeral home..."
After much persuasion, Su Yun turned around and looked at the makeup artist with the word "Huan" embroidered on her chest. If her eyes could tell, she would be pierced like a sieve.
The woman lying next to the coffin couldn't take it anymore. She rushed over and pushed the makeup artist to the side of the coffin, yelling, "Director, even if you don't want to return the money, you can't lie with your eyes open! How old is she? A newbie who's not even thirty years old, pretending to be an expert! Return the money!"
The makeup artist suddenly turned around happily and said, "I like to hear that."
Su Yun was furious. He pushed her head down and tried to keep smiling. "She looks young, but she is almost fifty. She learned the craft from our old master. Decades ago, when an old man was buried, he had to put on a red face. She just didn't understand your request at once. Don't worry, we will change it immediately. You can get a 30% discount on this order. Is that okay with you?"
After Su Yun's persuasion, which almost wore out his lips, he managed to keep the 50% discount and refund half of the money to the person. Originally, they didn't make much money from holding a funeral, and now they had to refund half of it.
The guests cried as they carried the coffin to the crematorium. Su Yun suddenly turned around and glared at the three young men who followed him. He raised his folding fan and pointed at them one by one: "You really are... Come to my office!"
Xicheng Funeral Home is an old funeral home. It is called Xicheng because it is located in the west of Bincheng. The west of the city used to be bustling and prosperous, and the funeral home had good business. However, with the development of the times, few people are willing to come here to hold the old and troublesome Chinese-style funerals.
The funeral home has been renovated several times. Its current facade is an ordinary building. Except for the facade, the other buildings are still in the style of ancient gardens. One of them is where Su Yun lives and works.
Su Yun sat on his own armchair and leaned back: "Squat down."
The three employees who had their heads down immediately squatted down, pinched their ears with their hands, and began to count.
Sexy Ghost: "The first rule of the funeral home is that you cannot put weird makeup on corpses. I was wrong!"
Ghost Bride: "The second rule of the funeral home is that you cannot turn a mourning hall into a wedding hall. I did nothing wrong today!"
"Shut up. You're committing a crime even more serious if you know the truth and don't report it!" Su Yun was so angry that he stood up and wanted to give each of them a fan.
Retired ghost messenger: "Article 3 of the funeral home's rules states that you cannot drag corpses or their spirits around at will. I did nothing wrong today."
At least there was someone who was reliable. Su Yun breathed a sigh of relief: "A Xiu, you can get up and stand by the side."
The retired ghost messenger named Ah Xiu slipped away immediately without any spirit of sharing weal and woe.
Su Yun sighed, squatted in front of the ghost bride, and said earnestly: "Xinxin, you can't always hang out with the ghost. Think about it, she ruined the funeral. Who will buy you a beautiful dress when I have no money in the future?"
The ghost bride was shocked and looked at Su Yun in horror: "Director, you are threatening me with your little skirt again!"
"This time it's real. I'll pick your skirt for a month." Su Yun showed the face of a cold capitalist, then pushed the ghost bride away and let her cry aside.
In the end, the ghost who made the mistake was left trembling in fear: "I was wrong, he is an old man, and none of his family members have communicated with me. They said nice things to themselves, but they don't care about the old man at all. I was angry and wanted to play a prank..."
It was just a prank, but the family members who were indifferent to the old man didn't expect that when they arrived at the mourning hall and saw the old man's particularly red face, they started to make a fuss about returning the money.
Su Yun listened and nodded slightly: "No matter what the family situation is, we should guarantee uniform, standard and thoughtful service. Even if the deceased is alone - no, a corpse comes to the funeral, you can't play it like this. Besides - the family members don't care about the elderly, they care more about money! Money!"
Su Yun shouted the following sentence into Yan Gui's ear: "Engrave this sentence in my heart! The less the family members care about the deceased, the more they care about money. We can't make any mistakes in service! Otherwise, we will be broke! Do you understand?"
The ghost covered her ears in shock: "Oh my god... people's hearts are so dirty, right? I want to go back to my hometown, Director..."
"Are you Zhu Bajie? When something happens, you just disband and go back to Gao Village?" Su Yun rolled his eyes at her, stood up and walked to his desk, took out a stack of red paper, and divided it into three parts for them.
"What is this?" The ghost bride took it obediently and asked softly.
Su Yun sat back on the armchair tiredly: "Recruiting gg, you guys, go and fill in all the gg positions in Bincheng, I want to recruit a reliable new employee."
Hearing this, the ghost bride opened her eyes wide in shock and cried bloody tears: "Director, you don't want us anymore?"
"No, I don't want it. Don't cry. If my newly waxed nanmu floor gets dirty, you have to wax it again for me." Su Yun had a cold face.
Then the ghost bride skillfully lifted up her skirt to catch the blood and tears, and blew her nose.
The ghost took a look at the flyer and said, "Director, even if you want to recruit new employees, this kind of black-and-red-paper flyer is not popular now. It looks worse than a scam."
The retired ghost officer nodded: "Yes."
Su Yun sneered: "GG? Do you think I look like someone who can afford to hire a designer to design a GG order? Or does anyone among you know how to do it?"
"...guarantee to complete the mission!" The three ghosts immediately responded in unison and ran away.
This scene really made Su Yun laugh. None of them were reliable when it came to working. When asked for money, they would refuse to leave and would back off. They were all evil men.
Three days later, Su Yun was basking in the sun in the courtyard of the funeral home, and the ghost bride came running over: "Director, Director! Someone has revealed the name of the winner!"
Su Yun turned over and said, "What list are you revealing? Are you still thinking about the time when you picked the number one scholar as your husband?"
The ghost bride ran to Su Yun's recliner, squatted down and said in surprise: "It's gg! Someone came to apply for the job with the gg list you wrote, Director. He's a tall, ugly man!"
Su Yun became interested in being called ugly by the ghost bride. She immediately sat up and said, "Ugly? I want to see how ugly it is."
When she returned to the office, Su Yun looked at the 1.9-meter-tall, handsome young man in purple Taoist robes. She tilted her head to glance at the three ghosts shivering outside the office door, then returned her gaze to the man: "Are you in purple robes?"
Taoist robes are divided into different levels, with the purple robe being the highest level for Taoist priests. A Taoist temple may only have one such old baby.
The man nodded: "Well, I'm afraid I won't be accepted. According to the hexagram, it will be easier for me to pass if I wear this."
"..." Su Yun hesitated as she was about to speak. She tilted her head again to look at the three ghosts outside the door. Not only were they unreliable and useless, they also avoided her sight. "Then, then tell me why you want to apply for my job."
"Because you are recruiting." The man replied doubtfully but as a matter of course, suspecting that Su Yun was asking a stupid question.
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