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Cui Shenzhi had arranged everything well in advance, including the delivery room, midwives, and imperial physicians, so as soon as Ping An showed any signs of labor, the Qianqing Palace was bustling with activity in an orderly manner.
Cui Shenzhi still felt it wasn't enough, so he sent someone to Cui Lingxian's princess residence to bring Lu Fengping over to oversee things before he felt a little more at ease.
But he had only been sitting down for a short while when a palace maid ran up to him from the delivery room.
"Your Majesty," a palace attendant curtsied, "His Highness is looking for you."
Cui Shenzhi was afraid something had happened, so he rushed in, ignoring the surprised and disapproving looks from everyone in the delivery room, and ran to Ping An's side and took her hand.
“Ping An, the palace servants said you were looking for me. Are you scared? Don’t worry, I’ve brought Feng Ping here. You know his medical skills. If he wanted to, even the King of Hell couldn’t snatch someone away.”
Ping An didn't answer. Instead, she gripped Cui Shenzhi's hand tightly and shouted, "I want you to stay here. I want you to see clearly how much I've suffered because of you and because of this child!"
Before he could finish speaking, Ping An let out a scream, and sweat poured down his forehead.
Seeing this, Cui Shenzhi's face paled, but he didn't know what he could do to help. He could only gently rub Ping An's hand against his face, wiping away her sweat while whispering to her, trying to soothe her emotions, but to no avail.
Hearing Ping An's increasingly loud screams, Cui Shenzhi's face grew paler and paler. Just then, the midwife came to his side and whispered, "Your Majesty, the prince is not yet due to give birth. He should conserve his energy. However, the prince keeps complaining and refuses to eat. When the time comes for him to give birth, he may not have enough strength."
Choi Shin-ji didn't expect that even before the time to give birth, her face would become increasingly pale.
He took the ginseng chicken soup from the palace maid and held it to Ping An's lips: "Ping An, would you like to drink just a little bit? Just a tiny bit. Or would you like to eat bird's nest? Buddha Jumps Over the Wall? Tell me what you want to eat, and I'll have them make it."
"I don't want to eat anything! I just want this little rascal in my belly to come out quickly!"
Having no other choice, Cui Shenzhi took a big gulp himself and then forced it into Ping An's mouth. Ping An didn't want to drink it but couldn't resist being fed like this, and she got so angry that she bit Cui Shenzhi's lip until it bled.
Cui Shenzhi didn't mind. He licked his lips and continued to feed Ping An until Ping An repeatedly said that she had enough. Then he stopped and started wiping Ping An's sweat, talking to her in a low voice, trying to calm her down.
Ping An only felt annoyed, and the more she listened, the more annoyed she became. Coupled with the pain in her lower body, she grabbed Cui Shenzhi's hand without saying a word and bit down on it.
The people in the delivery room were all at a loss, but Choi Shin-ji remained calm.
"Ping An, just like that, bite me, bite me hard, but don't scream. Save your energy for later, okay?"
Ping An didn't answer Cui Shenzhi, but instead bit Cui Shenzhi's arm hard, as if she wanted to bite off a piece of flesh.
Everyone wanted to offer advice, but seeing the couple's willing attitude, they didn't say anything.
However, Ping An didn't bite for long, because it was almost time for her to give birth. She was in so much pain that all she could think about was screaming, and she didn't have time to bite Cui Shenzhi.
Cui Shenzhi refused to leave and insisted on staying in the delivery room with Ping An. Since the imperial physicians could not enter, only female physicians could apply medicine and bandage Cui Shenzhi.
Three full hours later, Ping An finally gave birth to her and Cui Shenzhi's child.
However, Ping An, a new mother, didn't even glance at her child, because she fainted as soon as the baby was born. Cui Shenzhi, a new father, also ignored the child and staggered out to find Lu Fengping.
Lu Fengping was unaware that Cui Shenzhi had been bitten by Ping An. He could only see that Cui Shenzhi's sleeves were covered in bloodstains and that he was pale and panicked. He thought something had happened to Ping An, so he grabbed his medicine box and rushed in. He only breathed a sigh of relief after taking Ping An's pulse.
"Ping An is fine. She just lost consciousness because childbirth consumed too much of her energy, and her health wasn't very good to begin with. She was weak and had no energy, so she fainted. It's nothing serious. I'll prescribe some medicine for her."
Choi Shin-ji became even more worried.
"What do you mean 'not seriously injured'? You've lost too much blood and are deficient in both qi and blood, how can you say 'not seriously injured'? And what's this about Ping An's poor health? Why didn't you tell me before?"
Lu Fengping was worried that he was in the way and wanted to pull him out to explain, but Cui Shenzhi refused to leave no matter what. So he found a corner and tried not to disturb the palace servants as they tidied up.
"Childbirth is like passing through the gates of hell for a woman. If she is safe and there is no danger to her life, it is already a very good result, as it means that she has lost too much blood and is weak.
"As for Ping An's health... you know she grew up in the cold palace, and her body was naturally not good because she was not well-fed and warm. However, with my care, she is only slightly weaker than the average person, which is not a big deal, so I didn't tell you."
After hearing Lu Fengping's explanation, Cui Shenzhi's worries were relieved, but he was overwhelmed with countless feelings of guilt.
He clearly said he wouldn't let Ping An suffer any injustice, yet he didn't even know Ping An was in poor health, and he made Ping An risk her life to give birth. This isn't about not letting Ping An suffer any injustice; it's about making Ping An suffer all along.
Just then, the wet nurse carefully brought over the baby who had been tidied up.
"Congratulations, Your Majesty, Your Highness has given birth to a little princess."
Choi Shin-ji gently took the child.
Looking at the child's features, which resembled Ping An's, he secretly made a decision in his heart.
*****
After falling into a coma, Ping An went to the Kunning Palace, which was both familiar and unfamiliar to her.
She saw a woman radiating love gently stroking her slightly protruding belly, talking to the child inside. The scene shifted, and she saw the woman holding a somewhat familiar longevity lock, carefully carving something on it.
Just as she was wondering what this had to do with her, she saw the younger version of Qingya skipping and hopping to the woman's side, looking very close to her. The familiar yet unfamiliar song also rang in her ears.
She had a few guesses in her mind, and her eyes slowly lowered.
“Fu Yunjin,” Ping An’s voice was icy, “What are you trying to tell me by showing me this? That you love me so much, that you expect me to understand your expectations of me and become a mother after having a child, and to be truly close to me from the bottom of your heart? Don’t dream.”
"Parents who love their children plan far ahead for them. Chen Meiwu schemed against Cui Sugong, who was the emperor at the time, and Cui Shenzhi, who would become the emperor in the future, so that Cui Lingxian's life would be full of prosperity, both in the past and in the future. What about you?"
"You said you hoped I would live a peaceful and safe life, but you left me with a dead end."
"You are the Empress, and an Empress with the Fu family backing you but an excellent reputation. You could have openly distanced yourself from the Fu family while secretly colluding with them, using the power of the previous dynasty to suppress Shen Meiwu. But you did not. You only retreated blindly, which is why you have no ability to protect yourself and can only seek help from outside."
"You know perfectly well how cold the Fu family is to those who can't bring you benefits, and you also know how gentle my mother is. After sensing Cui Sugong and Shen Meiwu's malice, the decision you made was to have my mother take me to the Fu family. What kind of outcome were you expecting?"
“If my mother hadn’t been so clever this time and hadn’t made a scene, we would have been nameless skeletons in a mass grave, trampled on by everyone. If I hadn’t been able to hold on and tried every possible way to climb out of the Cold Palace, we would still be suffering there. If Shen Meiwu hadn’t been influenced by you and become a fool, raising Shen Zhi to be the way he is now, even if I had some of his true feelings, I would still be dead.”
"I will never understand your lofty, otherworldly 'love' in this lifetime, nor do I want to understand it."
"Even if everyone in the world thinks you are a perfect saint, to me you will always be just a stranger who gave me half of his blood, nothing more."
*****
Although Lu Fengping said that Ping An was alright, Cui Shenzhi still watched as the palace servants prepared the medicine, cooled it down a bit, and then eagerly fed it to Ping An. He was only relieved when Ping An's complexion improved slightly. Then he led Lu Fengping to the main hall and dismissed everyone else.
Seeing this, Lu Fengping was very puzzled.
"Shen Zhi, what are you trying to do?"
Cui Shenzhi looked at Lu Fengping with a serious expression in his eyes: "Fengping, I need you to prescribe a fertility-inhibiting medicine for me to drink."
Lu Fengping picked at his ears, thinking he had misheard.
“You heard me right, and I didn’t say anything wrong,” Cui Shenzhi said solemnly. “I knew that childbirth was painful, but I didn’t know it was this painful. When I saw Ping An in the delivery room just now, I really regretted it. I regretted why I let her get pregnant and why I let her give birth.”
“I can’t help but resent myself, and even… even resent that child. Why did I let Ping An suffer such pain? And why did she let Ping An suffer such pain? How could we be so cruel to Ping An?”
“I simply cannot bear to see Ping An go through that kind of pain again. I remember you said that the so-called infertility drug is just a way to reduce the chances of getting pregnant by damaging the body. Ping An naturally cannot take it, so I will take it instead. Cui Sugong was able to live to this age well after taking the infertility drug, so I think I should be fine too.”
As Lu Fengping looked into Cui Shenzhi's eyes, the image of Cui Lingxian and the pained cry of Ping An that he had heard earlier flashed through his mind.
He was really looking forward to Cui Lingxian giving birth to their child, but he was unwilling to do so if it meant Cui Lingxian had to give up her life for the child.
He nodded and said softly, "I understand what you're saying, but isn't the infertility drug a bit too much? After all, to achieve a permanent cure, you have to use strong medicine, which will inevitably harm the body. I'm not sure if it will affect your lifespan... And shouldn't you discuss such a big matter with Ping An? What if Ping An still wants to have children?"
After a moment of contemplation, Choi Shin-ji nodded.
"I will discuss it with Ping An. As for the infertility drug or the contraceptive drug... Feng Ping, please have one of each made."
Lu Fengping agreed.
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