30. The sparkle of the river
Zeng Xiasheng wasn't exactly an honest child. Born in the countryside but raised in the marketplace, he'd learned at a young age to spray water on waste paper to increase its weight, and to sell vegetables weighing only half a pound at a time. Yet, he'd never lied to Tang Sizhuo, not even a single word.
Therefore, Tang Sizhu had no doubt about his promise, but his brain was too hungry and needed some time to digest the information.
After she managed to eat a few bites, Zeng Xiasheng quickly finished the rest. He put away the dishes and was about to go to the kitchen to wash them when Tang Sizhuo suddenly said, "Leave them there and I'll wash them. You go to bed."
Although each dish was only a few bites long, there were so many of them that they took up a lot of bowls and plates. Zeng Xiasheng glanced at his hands and said, "It's a bit much, I'll wash it," and then said, "It's not a big deal, it's not a big deal, I'll finish it quickly."
Tang Sizhuo looked at him with a complicated expression, thinking that if she spoke like that, Qiao Shu would definitely be picked out and scolded. Zeng Xiasheng also realized that his words were inconsistent, his face flushed, and he fell silent, walking directly to the sink to start washing.
He retained many of his childhood habits. He would first run a pool of hot water, immerse the dishes in it to dissolve the grease, then wipe each one clean with a rag before starting the second wash, saving on detergent. Tang Sizhuo leaned against the doorway and watched for a moment, wanting to tell him not to bother, but after a moment's reflection, he decided against it. It was just a small matter. He'd do whatever felt comfortable to him.
She walked back to the living room and picked out the pajamas she had bought him from a pile of paper bags that had been sitting unused for two months in the corner. She also found three packs of disposable men's underwear in different sizes. Even with Lin Feng's help, the prison physical examination only checked height and weight, not girth data. Therefore, the clothes Tang Sizhu bought him were mostly casual styles, so even if they didn't fit, he could still wear them for the time being.
Before picking him up, Tang Sizhuo heard from her criminal prosecution lawyer that there were many things to be aware of after being released from prison: a good shower to ward off bad luck, and fresh clothes from head to toe. Deep down, she didn't want to admit Zeng Xiasheng had committed a crime or murder, and she wanted to give him a welcome, but she didn't want to be pigeonholed into this routine. So, after washing and drying all the new clothes, Tang Sizhuo even put them back in a shopping bag and brought them with her as a gift to pick him up. Unexpectedly, Zeng Xiasheng didn't even look at them, and left resolutely.
I can't recall it, because recalling it will make me angry. Tang Sizhuo sighed softly and comforted himself by saying: Fortunately, he has changed his mind now.
Zeng Xiasheng finished washing the dishes and came out to see Tang Sizhuo huddled in the corner of the sofa, her legs folded, her eyes cast down. The sun shone on her home sweater, giving it a fluffy, shiny feel. He froze for a moment, his gaze sliding down to her fair, slender neck. Suddenly, he felt the sun's warmth wash over him, burning from the bottom of his eyes to the tips of his ears, his cheeks scorching.
Noticing the movement, Tang Sizhuo slowly raised his eyes. Zeng Xiasheng hurriedly looked away, grabbed the clothes and bath towel on the sofa, and hurried into the bathroom.
Tang Sizhuo wasn't a particular person, but Xiao Tong had ingrained his meticulous habits. In her mind, washing her face was part of a complete skincare routine, and a bath wasn't complete without scrub and body lotion, even if it was just a couple of swipes. Consequently, the bathroom was cluttered with bottles and jars, seemingly unused and lacking any evidence of use. Zeng Xiasheng had washed himself from head to toe with a single bar of soap for nearly thirty years, examining each item carefully before selecting shampoo and shower gel.
Next to the washing machine stood a laundry basket, filled with the clothes Tang Sizhuo had changed out of that morning. Last night, after helping her take off her coat, Zeng Xiasheng stood by the bed, hesitating for a long time. He thought she might not be comfortable sleeping in pantyhose, but he couldn't bring himself to take them off, so he let her sleep like that all night.
Tang Sizhu usually didn't wear outer clothes on the bed, so he would have to change the sheets and quilt covers for her later - thinking so, he quickly took off his short-sleeved shirt and trousers and threw them directly on the ground.
Although she'd been cleaning up last night, covered in sweat and fumes, and had to shower, once the door closed, the enclosed space was filled with her faint fragrance, a blend of shower gel, shampoo, and various skincare products. Zeng Xiasheng was already exhausted, and once he took off his clothes, he felt his mind spiraling out of control, teetering on the edge of despair, every pore clamoring.
He even remembered those long and difficult times when he thought he would never see her again and was afraid that he would gradually forget what she looked like.
The punishment of imprisonment not only restricts freedom but also suppresses sexuality. Men incarcerated here endure a tedious prison existence, unable to see any women except for family visits. Even the few female police officers employed are relegated to administrative duties, barred from any contact with male prisoners. Consequently, the few crude portraits smuggled in at unknown times have become highly sought-after commodities, even though the women depicted are blurred to the point of appearing like blocks of color, and even though they risk being discovered, confiscated, and placed in solitary confinement during regular inspections, they remain in short supply. Prisoners slip these into the library's library of newspapers and magazines, devising ways to circumvent guards' delivery. Access requires connections and a private queue to obtain them.
Seeing his youth and fervor, Chen Tianhao had kindly helped him get it once and then thrust it into his hands. The picture, perhaps originally a calendar illustration, had been shrunk down to the size of an ID photo. The face couldn't be clearly seen; one could only vaguely make out the model in a plain white dress, holding a transparent umbrella. The leaves overhead were glossy from the falling rain.
Zeng Xiasheng sat on the bed and stared at her for a long time, but he didn't feel any desire aroused. Instead, his nose and eyes felt sore.
He gradually sketched out Tang Sizhuo's face in his mind, thinking that she was more beautiful than the person in the painting. However, the beauty born out of nowhere has never been appreciated sincerely by anyone. Just like this girl, she has been fantasized about by men all day long.
Instinct is innocent and desire is legitimate, but he doesn't want to become as dirty in her eyes.
Therefore, the more restless the night was, the more he restrained himself and tried not to think about her. Only when he was calm would he allow his thoughts to escape from the ventilated iron bars and imagine that she was also looking up at the moonlight.
Zeng Xiasheng stood in front of the sink in a daze for a long time, examining the various scars on his skin through the mirror. Some were caused by fights, some were caused by his grandparents, and the more recent wounds were the result of a fight with Sun Changming.
Sun Changming used fitness as a social medium, exercising regularly and maintaining a healthy physique. Nearing fifty, he was as big and strong as Zeng Xiasheng. They fought fiercely in the living room, knocking over Tang Sizhuo's trophy display case. Amid the clashing metal and shattering glass, Zeng Xiasheng was stabbed in the ribs by Sun Changming with a broken glass trophy. Fortunately, both men were nearing exhaustion at the time, so the stab wasn't deep, leaving only an irregular scar on his side that required more than a dozen stitches.
He was a man with a brain that hadn't been exposed to knowledge for a few days, a penniless wallet, and a body covered in scars. I didn't know what was so good about him that made Tang Sizhu like him. If he hadn't been so despicable as to seize the opportunity in childhood, he probably wouldn't even have had the chance to meet her, let alone make her remember him.
There were sudden two knocks on the bathroom door.
Zeng Xiasheng had been silent for too long, and Tang Sizhuo, concerned, came over. After knocking on the door, she didn't know what to ask. Should she ask if he couldn't find the shower gel, or if he didn't know how to use the gas water heater? She didn't think Zeng Xiasheng had any intellectual problems, and she didn't want him to dwell on the difference in living conditions. So she swallowed her words and stood at the door, waiting to see if he needed help.
"I, I'm fine, I'm washing."
Zeng Xiasheng spoke incoherently and stumbled into the shower room, forgetting that he had to wait for the gas water heater to start up. When he turned on the shower, he was poured with cold water from head to toe, and he woke up instantly.
Tang Sizhuo's shampoo foamed endlessly, and he was anxious to wash it. He was not used to the slippery feeling of his skin after using shower gel, and always felt that he had not rinsed it clean. After rubbing off a layer of skin with his palms, he came out with a fragrance similar to hers, red.
After a sleepless night, he was already exhausted, and the hot shower only made his eyelids droop. Zeng Xiasheng didn't want his dirty clothes to be an eyesore, but he couldn't wait to use the washing machine, so he finally forced himself to wash them a few times, wring them out, and hang them on the balcony.
Tang Sizhuo continued to curl up in her old seat on the sofa, neither playing with her mobile phone nor watching TV. She just huddled together with her knees hugged, her chin resting on her arms, staring at him quietly, watching him walking around the house in the dark gray cotton pajamas she bought, as if in a dream.
The study, adjacent to the bedroom and about half the size of the master bedroom, was originally the landlord's child's bedroom, hence the single bed in addition to the desk and cabinets. After Tang Sizhuo moved in, she replaced the wardrobe with a bookcase, but kept the bed. However, when she was home alone, she mostly worked at the dining table and rarely entered this room.
Zeng Xiasheng walked to the door and realized that he couldn't go to sleep without saying anything. He turned to look at Tang Sizhuo. When their eyes met, his mind went blank and he said dryly, "I'll take a nap and get up at noon to cook."
Tang Sizhuo was stunned for a few seconds, the confusion in his eyes gradually gathered, as if he was amused by him, and said helplessly: "Go to sleep, any time is fine, I will find something to eat when I am hungry."
Holidays are peak season for cell phone repairs, but Zeng Xiasheng wasn't planning on going back home for the next few days. He was dazed and sleepy, and when he got home, he barely remembered to send Chen Tianhao a message, but when he pulled his phone out, it was already dead. After struggling for a moment while sitting on the edge of the bed, Zeng Xiasheng decided to find a charger later. Chen Tianhao had been a rarity lately, and he was completely in charge of the business. He'd locked the door when he left yesterday. It was just a matter of missing a few days' worth of sales, so he'd just take a little less money this month.
Zeng Xiasheng thought so, tilted his head, lay down on the bed and fell asleep.
He was utterly exhausted, and seeing Tang Sizhuo willing to eat a few bites, a huge weight lifted from his heart, and he even snored softly as he slept. He'd thought his sleep schedule was regular, but having disrupted his body clock, he'd slept long, but instead, he slept through the afternoon. When he awoke, Zeng Xiasheng stared blankly at his unfamiliar surroundings for a long moment before finally remembering he was at Tang Sizhuo's house. The glow of sunset was already visible outside the window, and he suddenly realized he'd overslept. He jumped up, quickly opened the door, and went out, anxious to make dinner.
Tang Sizhu was watching a movie and turned the volume down so as not to disturb him. He was startled by the sudden noise and turned to look at him in horror.
Zeng Xiasheng immediately regretted his own recklessness. He had clearly moved in to take care of Tang Sizhuo, and this was only the first day. Not only did he fail to ensure that she had three meals a day, but he also made her fragile nerves even worse.
"I'm sorry. I...I'm going to cook now."
During the onset of the disease, the patient is extremely sensitive to sound and light and cannot stand being startled. Tang Sizhuo was extremely panicked and gasping for breath. It took him a while to recover. He shook his head and said softly, "I had some fruit. I'm not hungry. If you're not hungry, there's no need to rush to do it."
His mind was not fully clear yet, and he only had the single instruction of cooking. Tang Sizhuo said there was no need to do it. Zeng Xiasheng couldn't think of any other housework for a moment and froze in the middle of the living room.
Seeing that he was at a loss, Tang Sizhuo reached out to turn off the TV, looked at him and said, "Come and sit with me for a while."
The fabric sofa she had carefully selected was very soft, and the lemon fragrance placed next to it drifted faintly in the air, smelling very pleasant. Zeng Xiasheng sat carefully beside her, his hands resting awkwardly on his knees, the sound of blood rumbling in his ears.
His gaze darted here and there, and he caught sight of the clothes drying on the balcony. It suddenly occurred to him that his undergarments were thin and might have dried out. He should have taken them in before sunset, and the bedding in the master bedroom needed changing. It wasn't like he had nothing to do. However, his body seemed to be losing control, and he couldn't stand. He could feel Tang Sizhuo's presence. She leaned in closer, her long hair brushing against his shoulder, and then her head rested on his shoulder.
Tang Sizhuo said nothing, just lying quietly on her pillow. Zeng Xiasheng then realized that she had changed into pajamas, the same white style as his.
Cotton was soft and breathable, allowing body heat to flow gently through it. Their racing heartbeats slowly subsided, and their shoulders and backs relaxed unconsciously. It was as if the ten years between them hadn't lasted, and they clung to each other like children.
As the sun sets, its afterglow drifts into the living room, casting mottled shadows along with the floating clouds, like the ripples on the river.
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