Chapter 73: False God, False Cat, A Lie Desperate...
“You’re right, Vilette.”
After calming down, Leosley began picking the ice crystals out of his hair.
"Mainkuhn could not possibly be in love with Frynn."
That's great, you know that's good.
Navilette breathed a sigh of relief and apologized to the Duke with remorse:
"I was so rude. Please allow me to help you clean the water off your clothes..."
"After all, even if we consider Mainkuen's personality when he was a child, if he really had a lover, he would choose me without hesitation between my lover and me."
Navelette: "!?"
Leosley found it increasingly strange and couldn't help but frown.
"So what exactly happened? Hey, Vilette, why do you look like that? You look dazed and shocked, like you've discovered a new continent?"
"...It's nothing, I just suddenly realized it."
"So this is what brotherhood between humans is like—a profound and complex relationship."
I learned something.
*
Mainkuhn was obediently carried away by Funina, the cat skin concealing all his thoughts.
[Fukaros warned me that Frinina's existence was a crucial part of her plan to save the world, and that if I didn't want Fontaine to be destroyed, I shouldn't touch her, let alone reveal her human identity... But given the current situation, how could I possibly hold back?]
"Cat God~"
As promised, Funina happily ran to the top floor of the Moman Palace and rummaged through her quarters, finding a large number of jars:
What kind of food do you like? Poultry? Fish? Beef or lamb?
"Meow".
[This concerns my brother's life, so no matter what, even if it means resorting to intimidation or violence, we must get some information out of her...]
"Wow, wow, its tail keeps wagging, so conflicted? How about this, one of each! Here, I'll open it for you, mmm—"
Under the cat's sharp scrutiny, she began to try to pry open the pull tab.
[...]
Several seconds passed, and the jar remained unmoved.
"Haha, this is a big, premium canned food package; the seal is definitely more secure than the regular kind." She chuckled awkwardly, a light sheen of sweat beading on her forehead from the effort. "Mainly because I'm wearing gloves right now, so I can't exert any force. Once I take them off, it'll be fine... Heave-ho!"
Click, the can trembled and opened a small crack.
"Cat God, look! How can such a small difficulty possibly stump the God of Justice!"
She perked up, her fingers unconsciously resting on the edge of the tin plate: "Where's the plate? Where's the plate? I'm going to turn the whole can upside down on the plate so you can bite into it, like eating a little cake made of pure meat... Wow—"
The sharp edge of the blade pierced the girl's skin, and a large drop of blood flowed from the human's fingertip, splattering onto the ground.
Mainkuhn: "!"
"Oops! I couldn't resist... Where did I take my gloves off?"
Quickly suppressing her scream, Funina contorted her face and pressed a handkerchief against her wound. "I have to cover it up as soon as possible!"
[Gloves? No, what you need right now are band-aids or gauze.]
"Lady Funina!"
Before Mainkun could figure it out, a hurried question rang out at the door:
"What happened? I think I just heard you scream!"
They are competent guardians, standing guard at the gates of the gods, anxiously awaiting their reply.
"I'm fine, you may all leave."
The girl's relaxed and confident voice came from inside the door, as if their earlier screams were just their imagination.
"Yeah."
The captain of the guard nodded, seemingly accepting the divine command.
"Then I'll take my leave with my men—" —Yeah, right!
Bang! He pushed the door open, gun in hand, his sharp eyes scanning Funina's study frantically, not even sparing the cat with its fur standing on end on the carpet.
It seems there really are no assassins.
There was only one furious god.
"Hey! I already said I'm fine! Do you need me to give you paid leave to get your ear checked out?"
"I'm so sorry, Lady Funina!"
The head guard immediately apologized and saluted, speaking sincerely: "I was only worried that you might be taken hostage by assassins and forced to say something you didn't mean..."
"You underestimate me! I am a god!"
I'm so sorry!
The subordinates bowed repeatedly, utterly flustered: "But last time someone climbed over the outer wall into your bedroom, you didn't retaliate at all..."
"Ah, that matter."
Aside from the half-demons, no human noticed that Funina's face had paled; they could only hear the girl's high-pitched, gentle, and benevolent voice:
“After all, he is my believer. I am willing to forgive his body that is dominated by fanaticism, and I am willing to show him mercy under the full moon, give him a few divine words, and guide him on the path he should take.”
What a tolerant character! The guards were secretly amazed. Putting themselves in his shoes, they felt that they could never forgive a suitor who jumped into their bed in the middle of the night to confess his love. He truly deserved to be called a god.
"Are you alright? If you are, you can go down now. I need to discuss some things with Cat God alone."
Funina awkwardly put her hands behind her back and began to shoo people away.
"Okay... no."
Seeing the guards return, Funina felt a pang of panic, and fear began to rise within her: "What now? Do you still want to stay here for a meal? Or take a nap?"
Why aren't they leaving?! Did I give myself away somewhere? No way! I've already stepped on the bloodstains on the floor!
"I'm sorry, but I'm more concerned about why you screamed just now. Are you sure there wasn't an assassin?"
The overly conscientious head guard lingered, unwilling to leave, stubbornly standing guard at the door.
"Could it be that, in your benevolence, you have hidden him away to protect your people...? This is unacceptable, my lord! Whether they are fanatics or ordinary assassins, trespassing is wrong! You cannot forgive them; they should be brought to trial and punished by law!"
Fryna: "Huh? Wait, who's this 'Holy Mother' you're talking about? Me?"
Sometimes, playing yourself too well can be a source of trouble.
Do you think I don't fight back because I don't want to?
"Anyway, Lady Funina, please step aside so I can thoroughly search your closet and..."
No, I can't move aside.
A powerful sense of panic swept over the girl for the umpteenth time, making her unable to hear the guards' voices.
If we move aside, won't the blood on our feet be exposed? Won't the wounds on our fingers be revealed?
What god in this world bleeds? What god gets cut by a can husk? Won't my lie be exposed and seen through immediately?
"Lady Furina, if you don't let us figure out why you're screaming..."
The head guard, his expression resolute, repeated:
"We will not leave with doubts; that would violate the oath we took before joining the company!"
"We must spare no effort and pay any price to protect the symbol of Fontainebleau, the god of justice..."
Moved? She dared not move. Facing the devout and earnest gaze of her people, Funina felt dizzy and disoriented.
Good heavens, I've gotten rid of one Clorinde, but there are still thousands upon thousands of Clorindes guarding me!
I do want to be dramatic, but if Fontaine is destroyed because of a competent guard, no audience member will laugh!
"......"
There's nothing we can do.
"Enough! You're just doing useless things!"
A furious shout shattered the previously harmonious atmosphere, and the girl's angry expression broke the harmony.
"Lady Funina?"
The guards' gazes shifted from pure reverence to a somewhat bewildered question: "What's wrong? Why are you angry?"
Funina knew what she had to do; she had experience.
First, we must attack their dignity and make them shrink back out of shame.
"Insignificant ants who can't even control elemental power dare to dream of protecting the gods? How laughable! You worthless fools, there's a limit to your overestimation of your abilities." Is that enough?
Then, despise their faith and let them retreat in sorrow.
'Forget those vows; what good are they to me? A weak and powerless Son of Man is nothing but an eternal burden to God, and your vows are nothing but rubbish.'
That's enough. They will be heartbroken and leave me, leave my secret.
"I'm saying, don't you guys think your existence is a bit superfluous? After all—"
With her hands behind her back, she raised her voice and smiled, a harmless venom hidden beneath her tongue, ready to be sprayed upon her people.
“.
Suddenly, Funina saw the large cat, who had been standing silently, turn around and look at her with a complex, helpless, and almost human-like gaze.
My colleague looks a little sad.
It's because they're hungry.
Don't worry, I'll feed you well after I drive the people away.
I just hope you won't hate me when the time comes.
"After all, they can't even control elemental power..."
BOOM!!!
Almost simultaneously, a bright, silvery-gray shadow rose from the ground, spinning 360 degrees in mid-air to draw a perfect circle—
despair.
Then, as if nothing had happened, it landed back on the ground with all four paws.
"Mimi".
......
A moment of silence.
"Ah! What just happened???"
Shocking screams began to echo through the guards:
"Is the cat flying? Doing a backflip?"
"Ah! No wonder it's called the Cat God! So it has this special skill!"
They exclaimed in admiration and praise to each other, then quickly turned their attention back to the gods.
"Lady Funina, what were you about to say?"
"...I was just about to say..."
Funina was shocked and struggled to stifle her scream.
Navisette! When you invited me to see your cat do backflips, I thought you were finally joking! Turns out you were telling the truth! You made me so happy for nothing!
etc.
Under immense pressure, Funina's mind raced—
This situation is certainly something that can be taken advantage of!
"After all, even the Cat God, who can't control elemental power, can do such a perfect backflip! And none of you, as elites of Fontainebleau, can do it!"
She opened her mouth, swallowing back the venom that should have been sprayed, and twisted it back:
"Ahem, now you know why I screamed earlier! Get out of here!"
"Everyone, do a hundred backflips and then come back!"
*
[I was just trying to lighten the mood; Funina was being too tense just now.]
[And no matter how sad someone is, the moment they see me do a somersault, they're so startled they forget everything.]
Mainkuen pricked up his ears, his keen hearing probing everything around the Momang Palace.
"Mom, so many people are doing somersaults! Are our gods rehearsing a new act?"
'It shouldn't be; the translation is terrible.'
'Captain! I can't flip it!'
Keep it up, don't bring shame to humanity!
"Captain, this is really bad, my high blood pressure is about to spike!"
[...So I didn't expect this to happen.]
"Wow, I'm so smart!"
Funina finally dared to reveal the fist she had been hiding behind her back; when she opened it, her palm was covered in blood.
There was nothing she could do; the guards burst in too suddenly, and she only had time to clench her fingers tightly to prevent blood from dripping onto the ground.
Mainkuhn watched as she knelt down, wiped the bloodstains on the floor with a tissue, and then skillfully threw it into the fireplace to destroy the evidence.
"Luckily, it didn't drip onto the blanket this time, otherwise I would have had to carefully wipe it off for ages."
She bandaged the wound and immediately put on her gloves:
"It's best not to take it off, even while sleeping, until the wound is fully healed."
“.
I'm so tired, Funina.
As a fragile human being, it is impossible for us to go five hundred years without ever bleeding or getting injured.
So, do you always hide your wounds with such anxiety and trepidation?
So tired, so tired, like a footless swallow about to fall into the sea.
How can I treat you cruelly?
Okay.
Furness stretched out her hands, her knuckles bent, like a kitten showing off her unusually colored gloves to Maine:
"Can't you tell anything's wrong? Hehe, it's always good to wear more clothes."
That's certainly true.
Mainkuhn strongly agreed.
[Unfortunately, the gloves couldn't hide my sharp fingernails.]
"You must be starving. Oh, if only I had a can opener, but the kitchen at Mo Mang Palace never serves me canned food, so I naturally don't have this convenient machine."
In front of the cat, Funina finally gave up some of her stubbornness about the gods, and just sighed as she searched the study with her eyes.
"I need to find something to pry it open..."
[Need not. ]
The big cat jumped onto the desk and looked up, searching the study as well.
Unlike Funina, he quickly found what he needed.
A typewriter.
Mainkuhn frequently saw Navelette using it for work.
Tap. Tap. Tap tap.
Mainkuen was grateful that even during the most difficult days at the Hearth House, his brothers and sisters constantly tried to teach him to read and write, so that he wouldn't truly become an illiterate beast.
Ta-ta-ta.
"Meow~"
The cat meowed and stuck out its thin tongue to lick its paw pads, trying to get rid of the strange sensation of the buttons from its body.
"Hey, don't play with the typewriter anymore, it breaks so easily..."
The deity appeared in response, reaching out to stroke the cat's beautiful fur before looking down at the machine that was spitting out paper.
"Hmm? Let me see what you wrote~"
The girl picked up the paper with a light touch.
The characters on it are clearly written in black ink on white paper.
Hello, Funina
"people"
I am a cat
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