Chapter 3 / Section 3: The Stain
Regarding love, those secrets hidden deep in her heart, she so wished they would never be known, neither to the boy nor to the whole world. She often fantasized about returning to the scene of their first encounter; if they had just been strangers, perhaps she wouldn't be suffering this heart-wrenching pain now.
Yan Xinhe's departing figure cast a faint sadness in Lu Xiyao's eyes. Watching the figure gradually blur, Lu Xiyao sighed silently, "Yan Xinhe, how long will it take you to let go of those unbearable past events? You don't need to blame yourself; your sister's death really wasn't your fault."
Lu Xiyao understood that no matter how she tried to persuade her, Yan Xinhe's resolve would not waver. She could only silently protect her as a friend, unwilling to let Jing Moran discover her past deep affection. That humble unrequited love seemed destined to never change the course of the world. Every smile and frown of Jing Moran was enough to stir her heartstrings, yet she had never stirred even a ripple in his heart.
Lu Xiyao smiled bitterly and ran to the information desk to inquire about Xiong Yingguang's whereabouts. Her feelings for Xiong Yingguang were equally deep. Even though she knew she could not completely possess her, she had promised Haiyang that she would protect her for life and not let her get hurt.
Outside the operating room, Mu Xinghe was sobbing softly, knowing full well that her impulsiveness had harmed Jing Moran. If she hadn't spoken so recklessly, Jing Moran wouldn't have hurt herself with a knife.
Upon seeing Mu Xinghe, Xiong Yingguang instantly became agitated. She grabbed Mu Xinghe's collar, tearing his navy skirt into numerous wrinkles. "Mu Xinghe, how dare you show your face here! Can't you stay away from Jing Moran? You two are not even the same kind of people!" Xiong Yingguang roared through her tears.
“You’re right, Jing Mozhan and I are not the same kind of people, only you and him are. But that’s precisely why I’m stopping you from being together; you’ll only cause each other more pain,” Mu Xinghe retorted without backing down.
"Mu Xinghe!" Xiong Yingguang was furious, but could only helplessly let go, tears silently streaming down her face. She didn't understand why fate was playing such a cruel trick on her, causing her to lose so much, leaving her feeling resentful.
Xiong Yingguang felt an unprecedented sense of powerlessness. She couldn't make Mu Xinghe leave Jing Moran completely, nor could she let go of her own attachment to Jing Moran.
After making the phone call, Lu Xiyao rushed to the operating room door, each step heavy with emotion. She knew she might never be able to enter Xiong Yingguang's heart, but she didn't want to see Xiong Yingguang overwhelmed by grief.
Xiong Yingguang stood there, silently weeping. She knew that happiness was out of reach for her, and could only shed silent tears. She dared not make a sound, afraid of disturbing Jing Moran who was in surgery, and could only wait silently.
Lu Xiyao rushed into the elevator, which stopped on the twentieth floor. She immediately ran out. At the operating room door, she saw Xiong Yingguang sobbing uncontrollably and hugged her tightly. "Xiong Yingguang, it's okay. Believe that a miracle will happen," Lu Xiyao whispered comfortingly.
"Lu Xiyao, tell me, why are you with me? I'm so ordinary, why do you still want to be my friend?" Xiong Yingguang asked, her voice trembling with tears.
“Xiong Yingguang, there’s no need for a reason. You may not feel the pain in your body, but your heart can feel the pain, and that’s enough. You’re not a monster. You still have me, Cang Ruoxi, and Haiyang. They all love you.” Lu Xiyao hugged her tightly.
Xiong Yingguang felt Lu Xiyao's warmth, and that gentleness gradually seeped into her body. She knew that her existence would only bring trouble to others, which was why she had given up on herself.
Mu Xinghe, however, had always envied Xiong Yingguang. Xiong Yingguang had so many friends who cared about her, while she herself had only one friend, Jing Moran, from childhood to adulthood. This contrast fueled her jealousy, and she would never allow Xiong Yingguang to take Jing Moran away, no matter how much Jing Moran sacrificed for Xiong Yingguang, she would fight tooth and nail for her.
Time ticked by agonizingly, and Xiong Yingguang finally saw Jing Moran wheeled out of the operating room. His arm was tightly bandaged, and an IV drip was still attached to his hand. She wanted to rush forward, but Lu Xiyao held her back.
"Lu Xiyao, what are you doing? You won't let me near him!" Xiong Yingguang shouted anxiously.
“Xiong Yingguang, don’t you understand? The price you’re paying for being together is too high. You should wake up. Also, you’re leaving Nanning soon. Your mother hasn’t told you about this yet, has she?” Lu Xiyao said seriously.
"Leave Nanning? What happened?" Xiong Yingguang asked in shock.
“Your mother has arranged for you to study in Yantai, Shandong. After the winter break, you will continue your studies there, and you may even go to high school and university there. From now on, it will be very difficult for you to see each other again,” Lu Xiyao explained.
"Why?" Xiong Yingguang felt a wave of despair. She and Jing Mozhan were destined not to be together, and Jing Mozhan would disappear from her life.
"Perhaps this is the last time I'll be heartbroken for you. I just want to leave silently with my sorrow, leaving you with a final moment of happiness. I don't want to be a stain on your life, so let the winds of sorrow carry me to Shandong, where you're not, and let me bear this pain alone." Xiong Yingguang made this resolution in her heart.
Cang Ruoxi and Haiyang listened silently from behind the wall. They knew that only in this way would Jing Mozhan stop hurting Xiong Yingguang. From now on, they would no longer be blamed by anyone.
"Please forgive my selfishness. I don't want you to suffer alone. Because we can't feel physical pain, loving someone means giving unconditionally, even at the cost of sacrificing yourself for the other person," Xiong Yingguang thought silently.
And so, everyone is silently struggling with their own feelings, and their stories continue amidst sadness and helplessness.
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