Chapter 17 Male Ghost
I should have realized this when my anonymous report failed and I was caught by Lin Yan for "exchanging secrets".
This guy appears to be a warm and caring man on the surface, but deep down he is a man with an overwhelming desire for control!
Summer vacation came in a blink of an eye. I felt like I was released from prison in the first few days after the exams. I hugged my lost PS5 controller and wanted to kiss it twice.
Lin Yan kept his word. He returned the keys to their place, opened the game room, and even upgraded the midnight snack to a deluxe version of seafood porridge.
I once naively thought that as long as I stayed away from the Shura field of his exes, I could spend my summer vacation safely with air conditioning, games and feeding.
How could I forget that I myself might become the center of that "Asura Field"?
It was just an ordinary afternoon, and the sun was shining so brightly that the asphalt road was smoking.
Lin Yan and I went to the community supermarket to stock up on food, mainly to fill up his so-called "breeder's stock."
I was squatting in front of the potato chip shelf, struggling to decide whether cucumber flavor or original flavor would better soothe the points I lost yesterday due to my teammates, when suddenly someone patted my shoulder hard.
"Chen Rui?! It's really you!"
That voice, that strength... I turned around with a grin and saw a familiar yet unfamiliar face - my high school classmate Wang Dandan.
She was one of those social tough types. Back then in class, she could even pull the school dog, Dahuang, who was basking in the sun at the door, over to chat for half an hour about his ideal life.
I heard that she repeated a year, and I didn’t expect that she became my junior.
"Wang Dandan? Why are you here?" I was a little confused and subconsciously glanced at Lin Yan next to me. He was pushing a shopping cart with an unchanging, warm smile on his face, but I felt an inexplicable chill on my back.
"I live in the community opposite! Oh my God, you are also in this university? What a coincidence!" Wang Dandan was so excited as if she had discovered a new continent, and her speech speed was as fast as a machine gun.
"You've changed, Chen Rui! You used to be like a hedgehog, but now you look... well, much more pleasant! Sure enough, your temperament has changed since you went to college, huh? Have you found a girlfriend? Let me tell you..."
She talked enthusiastically and passionately about her story of repeating a grade and her experiences in the new school.
I responded with awkward but polite "um" and "ah", glancing at Lin Yan out of the corner of my eye.
I don't know when he stood behind me, his hands loosely resting on the armrest of the shopping cart, a smile on his lips, but his eyes were like the surface of a frozen lake, deep and unfathomable.
"I didn't expect you to like chatting so much." He suddenly spoke, his voice still gentle, even with a hint of smile.
It's over! It's that kind of "male ghost" smile! My hair instantly stood on end!
"No, no!" I immediately interrupted Wang Dandan's chatter like a cat whose tail was stepped on, "Well, Dandan, we have something urgent to do, we have to check out quickly! Let's talk another day, another day!" I almost ran away with the shopping cart, and didn't even bother to pick up the potato chips.
After paying the bill, I was carrying the bag on the way home. The air pressure was so low that I could squeeze water out of it.
Lin Yan walked beside me silently, and the plastic bag in his hand left deep marks.
"That girl is quite pretty." He blurted out out of the blue, his tone light and airy, as if he was commenting on discounted fruit in a supermarket.
My scalp exploded, my urge to survive instantly surged, and I began to pour out all the flattering words I'd accumulated over the past twenty years. "Oh my god! What a joke! How is she pretty? She's just an ordinary passerby! Besides, no matter how pretty she is, can she be as good-looking as you, Young Master Lin? Your looks would have brought disaster to the nation in ancient times! You're so stunning that you can make fish sink to the bottom of the water, geese drop to the ground, and the moon hide in shame! If she stood next to you, it would be like a firefly colliding with the sun..."
I racked my brains and poured out all the compliments I could think of, almost praising him as if he were a god who came down from heaven to save the world.
Lin Yan listened all the way, and the fake smile on the corner of his mouth completely disappeared, leaving only tightly pursed lips and an increasingly gloomy expression.
As soon as the door closed, I didn’t even have time to change my shoes, and my head was spinning!
The bag crashed to the ground, and the fruit rolled all over. Lin Yan threw me onto the bed like a chicken, with such force that I saw stars.
The next second, he pressed down on me, his eyes frighteningly dark, filled with an almost ferocious possessiveness that I had never seen before.
My clothes were roughly torn off, and warm lips fell heavily with a sense of punishment, blocking all my screams.
He didn't even give me any time to react, he just turned his face black, moved quickly and heavily, and had a fierce intention of tearing me apart and eating me up.
I was like a broken boat in a storm, being tossed around until I lost consciousness, and all my protests and questions were crushed in my throat.
When he finally stopped, I was so tired that I couldn't even lift a finger. I collapsed on the bed, gasping for breath like a dying fish.
The only sound in the room was our heavy breathing.
Lin Yan hugged me tightly, his chin resting on my sweaty neck, silent as a stone.
I paused for a long time, then carefully poked his sweaty arm and said in a hoarse voice, "I say...Mr. Lin, it's time for you to calm down, right?" This jealousy is too outrageous!
He didn't say anything, but held my arms tighter, which hurt a little.
I was about to speak again when I suddenly felt a damp heat in the crook of my neck.
Wait… damp heat?
My heart skipped a beat and I turned my head with difficulty to look at him.
This sight scared me to death!
Lin Yan...he was actually crying!
It wasn't the kind of crying that was like wailing, but silent tears that fell down in big drops, hitting my shoulders and feeling incredibly hot.
The face that usually always had a perfect smile on it was now pale, the eyes were red, the long eyelashes were wet and stuck together, and the tear marks sliding down the cheeks were shining in the dim light.
The pear blossoms are wet with rain, and I feel pity for them.
But this is fucking Lin Yan! The calm and composed Lin Yan who could play his ex to death and still get away with it, and who could even put on a tragic drama to make the whole school feel heartbroken when he was dumped!
He actually cried?! Or was he crying because I pissed him off?!
I was petrified on the spot, at a loss as to what to do. I was more terrified than seeing Godzilla land in the Huangpu River: "I say... Lin Yan! It can't be that serious?! Men don't cry easily, big brother! I really don't know her well! We were high school classmates eight hundred years ago, and today was just a chance encounter! She is a people person, chatting with everyone she meets. Look, she is more enthusiastic towards a dog than me! I swear to God, I only said a few words to her, I didn't even add her on WeChat! You..."
I explained incoherently, and seeing him crying, I was so flustered that I wanted to wipe his tears clumsily, but was afraid that the action would be too rude.
After a long while, when I was about to burst into tears, Lin Yan's sobs gradually subsided. He still held me tightly, buried his head deep in my neck, and said in a muffled voice with a strong nasal tone:
"sorry……"
This apology came so unexpectedly and was so heavy that it made my heart tremble.
Later, he finally calmed down a little, and we snuggled in the messy bed, and he told me the reason in a halting manner.
"It's not because of her..." His voice was hoarse, "It's me... I couldn't help it... Seeing you talking to others and laughing so happily... I just..." He paused, with an emotion close to self-loathing, "I broke up with someone before... just like that. She couldn't stand me like this... She thought I was too... too scary, and possessive like a madman..."
He finally raised his wet eyes to look at me, his gaze as fragile as shattered glass: "Chen Rui...will you also..."
He didn't say the rest of the words, but the panic in his eyes said it all.
I looked at him, my mind a little confused, and my heart felt like a mixture of all kinds of emotions.
I was shocked by the reasons for his breakup with his ex, and even more shocked by the vulnerability he'd never shown anyone before. Behind his seemingly perfect "doting," was there such deep anxiety and fear? And was I the root cause of his loss of control?
I sighed long and silently, and the grievance and fear caused by the "fall" in my heart were strangely replaced by a complicated heartache.
I reached out and patted his back a little stiffly:
"Alright, alright, it's no big deal... Do I look like a social butterfly to you?"
I tried to break the heavy atmosphere with a lighter tone. "My social circle, Chen Rui, can be counted on one hand! My WeChat friends are my roommate, my mom, and a few salespeople. I do have more gaming friends, but they're just online friends! Are you guarding me? You're guarding against air!"
After saying this, I found it a little funny and a little sad.
Lin Yan looked at me, and there was finally a faint light in his red eyes, like a drowning man grabbing a piece of driftwood.
He didn't say anything, but just hugged me tighter and buried his head back in the crook of my neck, like a large dog that finally found a safe haven.
Feeling his warm breath and the trembling that had not yet completely subsided, I looked at the ceiling with only one thought in my mind:
Well, I’m afraid I can’t escape.
This male ghost's possessiveness is like an indiscriminate killing weapon. Even I, the ten-thousand-year-old widower, was defeated. But... because he cried so beautifully?
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