Zhou Mo said she was bad, but actually I was worse.
I know Tang Tianxi likes Zhou Mo.
I also know that Zhou Mo likes Tang Tianxi.
But they were too familiar with each other, so familiar that even if that layer of window paper was broken, neither of them thought it could be taken seriously.
I also know that I actually like Zhou Mo.
The first time I saw her, I was attracted by her beauty. Although her beauty was not stunning, it was not flashy either.
He's about the same age as me, yet he can come up with such outrageous and shocking remarks...
She is a smart and beautiful girl, and I am attracted to her.
Maybe Zhou Mo is right, my aesthetic and emotional orientation is more inclined towards "intellectualism".
So she is unforgettable to me.
I like Zhou Mo, so I also have selfish motives and don’t want her to be with Tang Tianxi.
Since neither of them exposed the matter nor took a step forward, I pretended not to know.
To be honest, without mentioning relationships between men and women, it's really interesting to be friends with them.
I don’t have many friends, or rather, they are the only two.
But when it comes to emotional matters, I can't be generous.
Since I was a child, I have always had everything I wanted at home. It is impossible for me to give up Zhou Mo.
I have an obsession with Zhou Mo, and it is a paranoid obsession. I even thought that if I can't get him, I will destroy him.
This kind of thought is very evil. Sometimes when it arises, even I am afraid.
So I tried my best to be patient, and whenever it came to Tang Tianxi, I tried to control my emotions.
Everyone who has dated Zhou Mo thinks that they are Zhou Mo's lover from heaven. I am Zhou Mo's childhood sweetheart, but only I know that when it comes to childhood sweethearts, I cannot compare to Tang Tianxi.
Before me, Zhou Mo had always been very close to Tang Tianxi. Because he didn't want to lose his friend Tian Linlin, Zhou Mo deliberately distanced himself from Tang Tianxi.
But in the end, he still lost Tian Linlin and Tang Tianxi.
During that period, Zhou Mo was in a bad mood.
I am the only one around her, and I want to be with her all the time.
I accompanied her to eat at the snack street, to buy posters with her, to see Green Island on the beach with her, accepted her provocations, and also accompanied her to "rebel" and deliberately go against her parents.
I know Zhou Mo is angry.
Because she was not on the red list, she was criticized by her parents.
She said it was my fault, but his parents couldn't understand her.
Maybe her parents, who had always supported her, didn't understand her, which made her sad, so she was more willing to drag me into doing bad things.
Including the incident where the teacher found out about us, she deliberately took all the blame and put it all on me.
She wasn't really afraid of her parents finding out, she just wanted to keep her little secret from them.
When we were watching Green Island at the beach, I exposed her thoughts and she vehemently denied it.
On a whim, I asked, "Since you said we are in love, do you dare to kiss?"
Zhou Mo was extremely stubborn, holding his head high and refusing to admit defeat: "Why not? Come on, who's afraid of who?"
Although it is a provocation, I also have my own thoughts.
I wanted to kiss her, I had wanted to for a long time.
I had never kissed a girl before, and that time I kissed her was her first kiss, and also mine.
Using kissing to test whether I really loved her was a lie I made up to lie to her, and she believed it. However, after we kissed, I believed it too.
The moment the tip of my lips touched hers, my whole body froze and I was completely at a loss. All the kissing scenarios I had imagined in my mind thousands of times were of no use.
After that, I was convinced that kissing could really test whether I was truly in love.
So, after five years of being together with Luo Fu, I felt that the time had come and it was time to consider being together, but a sudden kiss from her confirmed the fact that I didn't like her.
After Luo Fu kissed me, my first reaction was disgust, and I asked her, "What are you doing?"
He even touched his mouth twice and was almost about to spit.
Luo Fu smiled and said, "We'll know if we love each other after one kiss. Now we both know."
After being kissed by Luo Fu, I suddenly realized that if Luo Fu and I were together, Zhou Mo would not be my only ex-girlfriend.
I didn't want this to happen, so my relationship with Luo Fu ended before it even began.
In the end, I still chose to go back to Zhou Mo, and I knew that the gap between her and me needed to be filled bit by bit.
The conflict between her and me is not just about our parents and backgrounds, but also about many secrets that come with it.
I didn't let Zhou Mo ask about the Han family because I wanted to protect her.
If Zhou Mo doesn't know, he will always be innocent. Once he knows anything about the Han family, Zhou Mo will not be able to stay out of it.
So I keep my mouth shut about everything concerning the Han family.
Facts have proved that I did the right thing. Later, the Han family was really facing the risk of liquidation. I was not afraid of being punished by law. I was only afraid that Zhou Mo would follow me and be dragged down by me.
I know that she loves me and will definitely be on my side. Even if I do something bad, she will cover it up for me and protect me.
However, harboring a crime is a crime, and I would rather she knew nothing and had nothing to do with all the dirty things.
After having a child, I understand Zhou Mo's father and my father better. This instinctive desire to protect one's children makes it impossible for people not to be selfish.
For the sake of my children and my family, I must make the most complete cut with the Han family, even if it means stepping back at the Han family before I die.
I can't let the Han family drag me down and let Zhou Mo and the child suffer.
It was also after this experience with Zhou Mo that I gradually realized that the environment I lived in before was like floating in the clouds, not solid at all.
Everyone looks up to me and envy me. They construct a life in the clouds in their minds, imagining how luxurious and wonderful it is. However, only those who are in the clouds know that the higher up the society, the more likely they are to do vulgar or inferior things.
The scary thing is that some people applauded this.
The fact that Zhou Mohong fell off the list of the Hong Kong University of Science and Technology started my journey of reflection in life. I often wondered if everything I had obtained was really what I deserved.
The answer is no.
Those securities firms, bosses, and brokers who found me for unknown reasons did not find me because I was Han Chen, but because my last name was Han.
Those who surround me with servile and fawning hearts are only afraid of the family power behind me.
Otherwise, how could a small doctor like me have so much money flowing into my bank card?
At the same time, I am in the quagmire of the Han family, and it is impossible for me to stay clean.
The Han family taught me a lot of things, including... what should be taken, what should not be taken, what can be taken, and what cannot be taken.
It’s not necessarily reasonable and legal to take what you should take, but... without evidence, the law can’t do anything to you.
The world is not black and white, but people who can walk in the gray area between black and white must have their own "extraordinary qualities".
Besides being arrogant and looking down on others, the Han family also taught me these things.
However, these are not good things.
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