-1-
Miss M never thought that kisses were anything important and precious.
Just kidding, she is a lunatic who would casually decide to have sex with someone for the excuse of "having fun". She has no idea how many one-night stands she has had and how many times she has casually abandoned them.
-2-
Not to mention the kind that has nothing to do with adults, has nothing to do with "sex" in any sense, and only stays at the lightest... the most harmless...
Touch.
Was that really a kiss?
No touch on the tongue, no touch on the lips, no fancy hotel aromatherapy or bright bedside lamp in the bedroom -
She was wearing a dark blue suit and he was wearing white casual clothes; their clothes didn't reveal anything.
Besides, her vision was a little blurred due to vomiting, and she had no time to gaze into his eyes.
...neither romantic nor sexy.
-3-
So, how could that possibly be related to "sexual attraction"?
It is also impossible to have anything to do with "adult transactions".
"It must be because I vomited so hard."
After a long while, Miss M said with a pale face - out of some subtle emotion, she had not taken her eyes off and had been staring at her subordinate's face since a minute ago.
If Miss M had time to turn around and notice the mirror on the sink, she would definitely be scared by her reflection in the mirror.
That was the first time that an expression of horror and panic appeared on M's face, as if he had seen a ghost.
...It is impossible for [M] to "see ghosts". She is the only one who can scare others. How could she be scared by others?
But Miss M, who didn't look in the mirror, didn't know how panicked she looked at the moment.
-4-
She felt completely calm, and her voice didn't tremble, so she smoothly expressed what she wanted to say:
"I vomited a lot, so my heartbeat was rapid. It's a natural reaction after vomiting."
Mr. P looked at her, as if he wanted to say something, but in the end he said nothing.
His expression was still cold, and he was obviously still bothered by her rude order for him to leave. No matter how you looked at it, his demeanor at this moment did not look like he had just experienced a "kiss".
Miss M suddenly remembered that there were several times in the past - many times - when she was bored to death and dragged her subordinates who were working overtime back to the dormitory, and he had the same expression when she threatened him with a dagger and started his night life.
...Huh, she suddenly felt unsure.
Miss M originally thought that Xiao P's expression, which was much colder than usual, meant that he was "starting to get excited."
Although it looks like "very unhappy", since this expression appears frequently in bed and frequently when she takes off her clothes - it should definitely be interpreted as "starting to get excited", right?
-5-
Didn't this guy also have fun when he just had a night out with her?
...Huh? ?
...What male animal in that dimension wouldn't be happy to have a simple, irresponsible night out with his beautiful boss?
-6-
Miss M vaguely realized that something extremely terrifying was happening.
Something even more terrifying than that kiss that wasn't even a kiss just now.
She stuttered a little: "Xiao, Xiao P, could it be that you..."
"Yes, it's your gag reflex."
The subordinate nodded without comment, as if he didn't want to discuss this topic with her anymore.
He reached out and turned on the faucet, soaked a towel with warm water, wiped her face, and motioned for her to rinse her mouth again.
No matter how cold his expression was, his movements were gentle.
After all, the subordinate is a calm guy who never lets his emotions affect his behavior. Moreover, if he has any emotions, he will tell her at the first time and express everything to her honestly.
"No, I don't want to do it." "Allow me to refuse, I have a lot of reports to deal with." "You really want it, but I'm really not in the mood." "Okay, I see. So my refusal is completely useless, right?" ...
Huh.
—Huh? !!
-7-
Were those annoying murmurs he made with a frown after she pushed him onto the bed really not a way of playing hard to get?!
Did she really, really always think that male animals "mean yes when they say no"?!
"Close your eyes. I'll wash your face again."
...Miss M was particularly silent and allowed her subordinates to wipe her face and rinse her mouth with a hot towel and a cup of water. She was as obedient as a speechless animal.
-8-
She didn't dare to speak because the amount of information she had just received after thinking deeply was too much.
Miss M rarely thinks so deeply about her relationship with her subordinates. That inexplicable kiss definitely pushed her normally relaxed brain into the "thinking zone".
…Ah! Damn it! Why! Why did my brain start thinking? Why did it come up with such a terrifying amount of information!
-9-
Miss M's eyes were already stunned by her own thinking mind. Her eyes were now as blank as a bird stunned by a stone.
The subordinate didn't say anything until he had taken care of her completely. He felt the temperature of her forehead and then reached out to touch her stomach.
"Still feeling bad?"
Miss M shook her head numbly.
"Still want to vomit?"
Miss M shook her head numbly.
"Can you walk?"
Miss M shook her head numbly... and nodded.
-10-
So Mr. P took her into the lounge next to the bathroom, found a soft chair for her to sit on, and turned around to pour her a glass of warm lemon water.
The concert did not pause because of the departure of a male orc. The "Courtship" movement seemed to have entered its most intense finale. When Mr. P went to pour water, two lizard orcs stumbled and fell outside the corridor. One had most of its body scratched by the opponent's claws, and the other had its entire head torn off by the opponent.
The variation of the "Courtship" movement intensified all the bloody conflicts, and FN799 has completely turned into a world of horror.
The lizard orc was of a very high level. There was almost no animalistic feature on his face except for the scales on his cheeks. The head that was torn off was almost indistinguishable from a human head.
The head rolled into the lounge, but Mr. P just stepped over its still grinning head with great indifference.
-11-
Although as an employee who adheres to the rules of neutrality, he should have rushed out to stop the riot and complete the repairs.
But his boss might be suffering from a mental attack at this time, and Mr. P was not in the mood to pay attention to it... Mr. P was not in the mood to pay attention to anything.
The lemonade was filled, and he turned back and stepped over the head again.
Extremely indifferent.
"It's the perfect temperature. Take small sips."
“…Oh, thank you.”
-12-
Miss M held the cup with both hands, and Mr. P sat next to her and directly pulled out the task panel with the crimson data stream.
"Please let me know if you still feel uncomfortable. You can be prepared to force quit this mission at any time."
“…Oh, okay.”
M looked at the lemon slice in his cup that was emitting a faint fragrance.
-13-
After about thirty seconds, she felt it was too embarrassing to stare blankly at the fruit slices floating up and down in the water glass.
She wasn't some high school girl who was too shy to look the person she liked in the face.
So M exhaled gently—exhaled gently—very good, calm—calm, natural—and then he could raise his head—
Mr. P looked over immediately: "Stomach hurts again? Feeling like vomiting?"
“…No. I’m just taking some deep breaths.”
-14-
Ms. M clenched her palms and forced herself to continue speaking bluntly: "I'm a little embarrassed now."
The subordinate seemed a little confused, and then his expression softened a lot.
"You don't have to think that way."
...Thank God, he finally put away that terrifyingly cold expression!
She thinks that subordinates who always smile brightly are boring, but that doesn't mean she wants to see his cold face that is not bright at all!
…Even if he showed up during the nightlife, it was just a fleeting moment. He had just maintained that cold expression for how many minutes. She was going crazy!!
-15-
A little person in Miss M's heart clenched his fists and shook them down fiercely - great, there was a smile on his face again - the little person who was cheering and jumping for joy had completely failed to consider that the owner's usual thinking process was to "tear off his fake smile", and as a result, when he saw that he really didn't smile, he trembled and hoped to see him smile -
Of course, the cheering little man couldn't figure out all this, and neither could its owner himself.
In short, the frightened expression on Miss M's face, as if she had seen a ghost, eased a lot.
Not seeing him smile would scare her.
"Well. I mainly feel a little sorry..."
I'm sorry.
Until just now, I didn't realize that you were sometimes unwilling. Until just now, I didn't realize that you never saw me as just...sex...
hiss.
Why should she start thinking seriously?!
-16-
"No. What are you talking about? You've never been sorry for anyone."
The subordinate quickly interrupted her, his expression growing colder. "Those guys are the ones who wronged you. Those guys...that person...it's okay that they tampered with your first love...I'll find them for you. Immediately."
Ms. M: “…What?”
She suddenly realized that their conversation was not on the same channel at all.
"Those people—no, the man with black hair and dark eyes whom you described as 'conventionally handsome'."
When Mr. P said this, he paused, looked away again, and looked at the light screen he had pulled out in mid-air.
His mood had reached its lowest point in recent times, and he was unable to mention the man in a calm tone while looking directly into his boss's eyes.
Miss M was bewildered. She became even more bewildered.
"What? Why are you mentioning him?"
You just kissed me, why are you mentioning that greasy first love who I don’t know if he died eight hundred years ago?
-17-
"Of course I have to mention him." The subordinate's eyes reflected the rapidly passing data stream. "It's obvious that your sudden illness just now was not a natural phenomenon."
"I've checked, Ms. M. There's nothing wrong with the breakfast, concert menu, or drinks... You don't have food poisoning... Food poisoning wouldn't have taken nearly an hour to develop. Comparing the bugs that have appeared in this world with FN799's past records, I'm certain someone tampered with you through the concert. As we approached the violin on the second floor, you suffered some kind of mental attack—but you're quite strong—and the result was sudden nausea and vomiting. While I patiently waited for you outside, I was investigating the cause... and this is my only theory."
Ms. M: “…”
"As it turns out, this is it..." The subordinate's face was almost bloodless under the reflection of the indigo data points, and his eyes were empty. "The records show that besides me, an employee from the System World secretly accessed the world monitoring screen of the Horror Maintenance Department and checked the list of male orcs on the invitation list for this concert."
"You were discovered to be the only male orc of unknown origin, suspected to be a disguised system employee. Therefore, your invitation was marked, and you were targeted by the mutated concert."
Mr. P, expressionless, pulled out several densely packed files from the semi-empty room. "They're being very cautious, but if they hack into this channel, I can do it in five minutes... no, three minutes..."
Ms. M: “…”
-18-
Miss M thought blankly, wow.
He was actually talking about work.
...He had such a cold expression earlier. Was he provoked by my sneak attack during the mission? Was it purely work-related?
-19-
"I...that...Xiao P...we can put this matter aside for now..."
Mr. P's hand paused as he typed the command.
"I don't see how anything could take precedence over this."
The subordinate's tone at this time was unprecedentedly tough:
"Someone attacked you. It's my job to take care of him."
M opened his mouth and closed it again.
She never thought that one day she would say this to her subordinates, but she said it anyway: "Xiao P... calm down..."
"I'm calm. I'm figuring it out."
“…Little P…”
-20-
Mr. P closed his eyes and took a deep breath.
"I originally thought the original 'Spring' movement was simply an over-the-top variation of 'Courtship'. When you approached the violin, I'm convinced a separate violin played a separate, distinct note in your ear. Thinking back carefully, I'm absolutely certain of my pitch. By mixing the different notes into 'Courtship', the music playing in your ear became the first measure of another movement. I've checked my memory and just pulled up the data fluctuation monitor. I can be absolutely certain—"
"The thing that caused you mental damage, and only caused you mental damage, was the first verse of 'First Love'."
-twenty one-
So, what made her uncomfortable, nauseous, and extremely embarrassed...
It was those memories that were evoked by "First Love".
Why did the so-called president use this piece of music to attack her?
Because she knew very well that this piece of music could directly shatter all her psychological defenses.
-twenty two-
...The president just didn't expect that Miss M didn't collapse, but felt sick.
Perhaps it was because she was too strong. Or perhaps it was because she truly had no feelings for the person she had been replaced with.
However, this is not a reason to forgive the other person.
Mr. P opened his eyes again.
He stared at the cold light screen, trying very hard to suppress the emotions that were about to burst out back into his throat.
"So, Ms. M. As your subordinate, I respect any choice you make, any relationship you've ever chosen, and the many pasts you have that I can't touch. But the only thing I can't do is respect you—"
Ugh. My throat. It hurts.
"—A memory you cherished was used by him as a weapon to crush you."
-twenty three-
"Ms. M. Whether it's the black-haired man who was replaced, or the unknown first love who was not replaced. I can't respect any of them."
"The former stole a precious memory and claimed it as his own. The latter... he was weak, pathetic, and hateful. He couldn't even protect the memory you cherished."
Mr. P chuckled softly. His knuckles were clenched white.
-twenty four-
"To be honest, I would rather your first love was that black-haired man and not be replaced at all. At least, that man is much stronger than the weak guy who was replaced. That man also knew to take over your memory, but he did nothing."
-25-
Miss M looked at him and suddenly felt a little scared.
She felt unprecedented cowardice and an extremely strong sense of apology.
...suddenly and without any reason.
"But no one can easily take over my memory, Little P." She said softly, "Unless I put that memory in the 'to be packed' area, ready to be discarded at any time."
Mr. P paused, turned his head, and finally met her eyes.
There seemed to be a rolling scarlet in his eyes that was about to burst out, but the look he gave her was still very patient and serious.
-26-
"No. You've never wronged anyone. If that memory had been something you were ready to discard, it wouldn't have affected you this way after all these years. The altered memory is so sickening that it makes you physically sick—your own body, your own—"
He reached out and gently touched her chest.
"Your heart is trying to tell you that this memory is so important that it will hurt you. You cannot tolerate anyone distorting that person. The person you truly...first fell in love with."
-27-
Miss M touched her chest blankly.
……my heart?
What is he talking about?
If I had to cite this strange suggestion... this... inexplicable... impulse...
Miss M looked at her subordinate's expression at the moment.
His eyes didn't seem as clear and blue as before. His eyes seemed to say many things. His brows were still tightly furrowed, and the corners of his mouth had lost that cheerful smile. He drooped his eyelashes, almost covering up the emotions rolling in his eyes.
...his expression at this moment.
-28-
Miss M pressed her chest in confusion.
"I didn't take any other hint. It just hurts looking at you. I... don't like the look on your face."
-29-
"Xiao P. Don't...don't be angry."
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