genius
Noxian calendar year 9??, Bandle City
"Enemy attack?! Where! Where are the enemies?!" With a hysterical roar, Kree, riding his cowardly lizard Skaarl, charged into the square like a runaway battering ram. He swung his lance wildly, knocking a group of playing young yordles flying like colorful bowling pins, their cries of alarm rising and falling.
"Is it this big guy?!" Kled's cloudy eyes instantly locked onto the largest target on the field—Iris. He pointed the tip of his spear directly at her, spitting as he roared, "Speak! Are you a scout sent by Noxus?!" Before he finished speaking, he spurred his horse and charged towards Iris, looking as if he wanted to pierce this "invader" who clearly came from the Prime Material Plane right through her.
"Kree! Stop! She's a guest!" Tristana, carrying "Boom," tried to stop the inexplicable commotion, her voice filled with helplessness.
"Guests? Bah!" Kree wouldn't listen at all, his scars contorted with agitation. "I think he's a spy! Being tall is a sin! He should be arrested and tortured!" The scene became even more chaotic.
Just then, a dull tremor came from beneath their feet, as if an invisible mammoth was approaching with heavy steps. The tremor grew stronger as it drew nearer, and even the pebbles on the ground seemed to bounce gently.
From the direction of the city gate came a chorus of exclamations from the Yordles: "Wow—!" "That's amazing!"
In the distance, a giant stone slab, comparable in size to a small city wall, was steadily and slowly "moving" towards the square. As it drew closer, everyone could see a petite figure beneath the slab—Bobby.
Poppy carried the massive stone slab, five meters long, three meters wide, and twenty centimeters thick, leaving a deep footprint with each step. She walked up to the group, carefully placed the slab down with a resounding thud, causing the ground to tremble. She wiped non-existent sweat from her forehead and said casually, "I've brought it back. I have things to do in Demacia, so I'll be going now."
Several Yordle craftsmen who had been waiting hurriedly stepped forward to express their gratitude. Poppy casually waved her massive hammer in response, then turned and left as quickly as the wind, truly coming and going in a flash.
Kree stared in disbelief, temporarily forgetting his hostility towards Alice, and poked the stone slab on the ground with his lance: "What... what are they doing??"
Teemo's voice came from beneath Kled: "Kled! Can you at least tell your stupid lizard to get off me first?!"
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Kree reluctantly gestured for Skal to step back, still eyeing the stone slab and Alice with suspicion: "So, this broken stone is for her to use as a floor? To keep her feet from touching the ground?"
Tristana sighed and explained, "Yes. Poppy happened to come back that day and heard about Alice's situation. She just said, 'Since you can't control magic, why not just block it?' Then she went back to Demacia and brought back a magic-blocking stone. This is the second one."
"What the hell?!" Kree's little eyes widened. "A second one? Are you going to build her a two-story house, or pave a 'magic-free road' running through Bandle City??"
“The craftsmen plan to use these stone slabs, combined with some stabilizing magic, to create platforms and tools for her to travel on,” Tristana said.
"Tsk," Kree curled his lip in disgust, "Women are such a hassle."
Just then, Alice noticed the noisy new face. Standing on the stone slab, she ran over curiously, a friendly smile on her face. Before Kree could react, she bent down, scooped the little yodel from Skaarl's back, and hugged him warmly like a large plush toy, saying happily, "A new friend has arrived!"
Kree's entire face was instantly buried in an incredibly soft and enormous "warm wave". "Ugh! Ughhhhhh!!!" He thrashed about, letting out a suffocating groan, and even his lance slipped from his hand.
Yes, Alice has grown up.
Bandle is a strange, magical place where logic doesn't exist, time loses its meaning, and the natural laws of the material world simply don't apply. In Bandle, any race other than Yordle will feel all their senses heightened. Everything in the city is vibrant with color, and the taste of the food and water is intoxicating—once tasted, it's unforgettable. Here, the sun shines brightly, spring waters flow endlessly, and every plant bears abundant fruit.
Alice herself had no idea how long she'd been there—she'd always had a poor sense of time. The once slender girl had blossomed into a mature woman. Her height had increased to 1.6 meters, and the most noticeable change was in her breasts. As if under some kind of crazy growth spell, or perhaps from eating too many strange and unpredictable snacks fed to her by her Yordle friends, they had grown from flat-chested to a remarkable G-cup, undulating like a camel with two humps on its front when she walked.
Just as Kree was about to be suffocated by this "friendly" hug, Alice's attention was drawn to Skaar. She looked at the lizard, whom she had never seen before and who seemed rather grumpy, with surprise. She released Kree and gently stroked Skaar's broad forehead. To everyone's surprise, Skaar didn't resist; instead, it obediently rubbed against her palm, even shifting its position to indicate that "scratching here feels better."
Alice happily hugged Skaar's neck, kissed its head, and asked, "Can I sit on you?"
As if understanding, Skaarle tossed his head back and skillfully positioned the saddle on his back towards Alice. Alice gracefully flipped over and mounted him. The next moment, Skaarle seemed to be infused with a wild soul, transforming into a whirlwind and dashing away! Seeing this, the surrounding Yordle children cheered and mounted their respective mounts—some were Mushroom Bouncy, some were Butterflies, and some were Running Carrots—and swarmed after him, creating a chaotic and joyful "horseback battle" that instantly unfolded in the square.
Having just escaped the "face wash," Kree stared in disbelief at Skaar, whose horse, which usually wouldn't let anyone touch it except her and would often run away at the last minute, was now carrying that "big guy" and running around happily, even cooperating with her commands!
"Skaar!! My good girl!! Come back!!!" Kree pounded his chest and stamped his feet, letting out a grief-stricken roar.
Timo patted him on the shoulder sympathetically: "Professor Heimerdinger has researched it; it's her 'earth affinity' that's to blame. Animals that live on the ground will inevitably feel drawn to her, finding her as warm and reliable as the earth. You... take care."
Kree: "..." He looked at Alice laughing and frolicking in the distance and Skaar, and felt his heart was colder than when he was surrounded by enemy troops.
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Because of his mount's "betrayal," Kree was temporarily unable to return to the battlefield he longed for. After all, without Skaarl, he couldn't even mount a proper charge. Every day, he could only watch helplessly as Skaarl carried Alice around the city like madmen, ignoring his calls as her rightful master. Skaarl was completely obedient to Alice, never going west when told to go east, and never chasing butterflies when told to chase moths, a far cry from his timid and cowardly demeanor when fighting alongside him, always ready to run away.
Kree was heartbroken, he was melancholy, his head ached, and he tugged at his already thinning hair. After his two hundred and seventy-fourth failed attempt to lure Skaarl with jerky, and instead watching it devour the fresh fruit Alice had given him, he finally couldn't take it anymore. He found Timo patrolling the mushroom forest.
Kled stopped Teemo, his face filled with unprecedented despair: "Do me a favor, bro."
Without looking up, Teemo continued checking the growth of a glowing mushroom: "I'm busy, bro."
Kree leaned closer, lowered his voice, and used his trump card: "You're busy? You mean the kind of busy where you hide by the lake every day, even 'dutifully' keeping an eye on them when they're taking a bath?"
Timo froze instantly, his entire face, including the tips of his ears, turning bright red: "...Say it! What kind of help is it!"
Kree looked utterly dejected: "Please help her find a new mount! I can't take it anymore! Seeing my wonderful girl eating, living, and playing with someone else every day... I'm about to have a heart attack!"
Timo looked at him speechlessly: "What are you afraid of? They're not the same species, and... they're both female."
Kree looked at him like he was an idiot: "Is this a matter of species or gender? This is loyalty! This is a bond! Will you help or not!"
"I won't help."
"...Hey! Everyone come quick! Captain Teemo is peeking..." Kled pretended to shout.
Timo was terrified and covered his mouth tightly, squeezing out through gritted teeth, "Help!!! I'll help, okay!!!"
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Teemo was forced to embark on a journey to the material realm to find a suitable mount for Alice. Meanwhile, Kled, while waiting, began to wander aimlessly around the city, his mood worse than mud on a gloomy day.
That day, he saw a group of Yordles laughing and joking as they headed towards the little house made of rainbow vines where Alice lived. Kree, bored out of his mind, leisurely followed, wanting to see what they were up to this time.
Upon arrival, they found a group of people gathered around a huge anti-magic stone floor. On the floor sat a large table that had been temporarily moved there, mysteriously covered with a cloth embroidered with comical patterns. It turned out that the "anti-magic stone auxiliary device" that the craftsmen had made for Alice had finally been completed, and a proper unveiling ceremony was being held.
Poppy had lived in Demacia for many years, and although she hadn't eaten pork, she had seen pigs run. Before she left, she chatted with a few Yordle craftsmen who were good at making magical items and provided an idea for the anti-magic stone. The clever craftsmen tested out the right enchantment ratio in just a few days.
And so, a set of... a very unique "device" was placed in front of Alice.
Two craftsmen, one on each side, solemnly helped Alice put on... handcuffs and shackles. Long stone chains, also made of anti-magic stone, dangled from them. The craftsmen looked at Alice expectantly, gesturing for her to stand up and walk a few steps.
Alice's posture at this moment resembled that of a chained stone lion trying to get up but unable to. She tried to stand up on her hands and feet, struggling to do so, but the two anti-magic stone instruments were too heavy. Her face turned red, and in the end, she could only awkwardly stick her buttocks out.
Alice looked up, her eyes reddening, her lips trembling: "QAQ... I can't move..."
Kree, who was standing to the side with his arms crossed, said, "...Are you guys fucking crazy...?"
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A few days after the failure of the torture device... well, the wearable assistive device, Kled saw the Yordles flocking in groups towards Alice's residence again. Having learned from his previous experience, he followed them with practiced ease, ready to see what new tricks these genius craftsmen could come up with this time.
"Ta-da!!!" Alexander Pofilimovich Romanov, who called himself the most skilled craftsman of the younger generation of Yordles—he insisted on using his full name to show off his power—slipped off the cloth covering an object with a "whoosh," showing Alice his latest masterpiece: "Welcome to witness! This is what I painstakingly crafted for you—the Anti-Magic Stone Auxiliary Device 2.0! Code name 'Wind of Freedom'!"
A stone wheelchair with a rather sturdy design appeared before them. The wheels were large, and the entire chair was constructed from anti-magic stone.
Alexander, with great enthusiasm and animated expression, introduced the wheelchair to Alice: "Having learned from the lesson of 'Binder 1.0,' I racked my brains for three days and three nights! Finally, a brilliant idea struck me, and I found the perfect solution—that is, not to wear it!"
He pushed the wheelchair over, gesturing for Alice to sit down. Then, he excitedly began pushing her around the anti-magic stone floor, the wheelchair creaking slightly: "See! Now you won't be crushed anymore! Now you can wander around and enjoy the beautiful scenery of our Bandle City! Don't you feel the breath of freedom!"
Alice, sitting in her wheelchair and being pushed around in circles, found it all very novel and clapped her hands happily, exclaiming, "Yay!! Alexander is amazing! We can go everywhere now!"
"Hehe!" Alexander smugly put his hands on his hips, his nose practically pointing to the sky. "I, the future number one craftsman of Bandle City, am not just a name without substance!!"
At this moment, a Yordle child who was watching the commotion suddenly asked a thought-provoking question: "Then why doesn't she get down and walk by herself? This chair has wheels, and she has legs too."
Alexander answered with absolute confidence and without room for argument: "She cannot touch the ground, child! A massive influx of earth element will flood her body, and she will faint!"
The Yodel boy blinked and continued to ask, "Then what's this anti-magic stone wheelchair for?"
Alexander patiently explained, "This can prevent underground magic from flowing into her body through the contact point, protecting her!"
The Yodl tilted his head, logically pointing out the key issue: "But she's in a wheelchair, and her feet aren't touching the ground. So this stone chair is preventing... ugh!... wooo!!!"
His mother swiftly covered his mouth and dragged this "master of sabotage" away from the scene.
Kled watched from the side, clicking his tongue in disbelief, hoping that Teemo would quickly bring back a reliable solution from that world.
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