Chapter 296
Ever since she got sick, he had been doting on her even more... to an unreasonable degree. People around him couldn't stand it any more.
Wang Jiazhi was curious: could feelings really be taken back all at once just because of disappointment? Her understanding of the saying, "spilt water is hard to take back," wasn't that feelings were irretrievable, but rather that once you've given, even if you know it's wrong and unworthy, you can't rationally turn back and stop loving.
For example, whenever she was sick, he'd always nurse her tirelessly. If she were his wife, he'd have a significant element of responsibility. But there wasn't any element of responsibility between them; they were bound together purely by affection. If he treated her this way simply out of affection, and if one day he decided she wasn't worth it, could he truly cut ties and completely withdraw, as he had in his previous life? She didn't believe he'd kill her to make her give up. If someone truly loved someone, they wouldn't want to see her die like that, no matter what.
Or perhaps she felt she didn't know how to judge people, oversimplifying them. It was as if she'd been too foolish to see past that group, and it had hurt her deeply. Perhaps she also didn't understand him. After all, those who rise to high positions, after such a long process of separation, are naturally more ruthless than ordinary people. Perhaps he really could be so purely profit-seeking and avoid harm, so decisive in letting go of feelings.
He hadn't come back in the past two days, probably because he had something else going on. Wang Jiazhi thought she should go out for a walk; usually, if she distracted him, he would come back.
Walking down the street, she remembered that she hadn't seen a movie since she left. She used to consider watching movies a kind of spiritual sustenance in her life, but now she didn't feel that way anymore.
This movie is definitely worth watching. At the end, the high-ranking official kills his superior and sits in the car as he leaves. His clothes are stained with blood, but he seems calm and doesn't seem to mind.
She thought, perhaps even though his superior had ultimately cruelly exploited him and attempted to kill him, he'd seen through his boss's despicable hypocrisy and political maneuvering. But after all, the two of them had grown from youth to middle age, endured near-death experiences together, and fought their way to the top together. Perhaps there had once been a bond as close as brothers, even at its most cold-blooded, purely exploitative, but after so much together, so many years together, even at the point of life and death, they had become incredibly important people in each other's lives, with an inseparable bond. Even if that bond was cruel, it was filled with the same hatred one would harbor for a family member.
Of course, Wang Jiazhi also felt that it was possible that the senior official had already stained a lot of blood and didn't care at all.
She thought, if he came to kill her then, she would be covered in his blood, and his clothes would never be able to be washed out, and he would have to wash himself for a long time to get rid of the blood. But of course he wouldn't have a change of clothes with him, and it would take a long time to get home from there. She imagined him covered in her blood, and what would he be thinking along the way?
A long time ago, she thought that if they beat him to death and his blood was all over her, she would not feel scared, but would feel a sense of peace of pain. Of course, she didn't think about it now, as it was too scary.
She flipped through the latest magazines at the newsstand, and sure enough, someone had criticized her article again. This time, it was about the story "Purple Smoke and Brocade," in which the protagonist, trapped by the loss of love after the death of a princess from the previous dynasty, suffered a lifetime of grief. People criticized her writing for being childish and naive. How many men would truly grieve for a lifetime over the death of a woman? Even ordinary men could be like this, let alone a powerful politician, with a vast world and a wealth of women to choose from. At most, it was like Emperor Taizong of Tang with Empress Zhangsun and Emperor Taizu of Ming with Empress Ma, but they still had harems of three thousand concubines, so they lived their lives as they should.
This time, Wang Jiazhi felt the urge to file a lawsuit.
As the tricycle approached home, she saw a few blue-gray birds sitting on a tree trunk, like balls of fur. She got off the tricycle and stopped at the foot of the tree to watch them. As she walked back, it suddenly started to rain. The weather was already very cold, and the raindrops felt cold on her face.
"It will snow next time," she thought to herself.
When I ran back, I didn't get too wet, but my hair and face were a little wet, and some rain fell on my body, which was cold.
As soon as he entered the house, he actually came back. He saw her wearing a coat, her face was a little pale, and there was a fallen leaf on her hair, like a kitten caught in the rain.
"Oh my god, we're getting caught in the rain again," she complained.
He went over and took the fallen leaves off her head and said, "There is a leaf here."
"Hmm? When did it fall?"
He held her in his arms, hugging her clammy, slippery body. The smell of rain mixed with her perfume, her hair felt damp. This familiar yet distant feeling, he often had this feeling, but he could not remember when it happened.
In her previous life, she went to the house on Xiafei Road for the first time. It rained that day and she felt very wet and cold when she hugged him in her arms. Her skin was cool and smooth, and became whiter and softer. Her hair was wet with rain and felt a little wet.
That was the first and only time he felt so depressed and everything went haywire.
This had never happened before. He was supposed to interrogate her, but she knew nothing and had simply clumsily seduced him. But even with such a clumsy seduction, he couldn't control himself. He couldn't figure out what had happened that day that had turned him into that state, losing even the composure he had before entering the industry as a young man.
That day was a complete mess. Whether it was interrogating the prisoners or playing with the women, everything was hectic and messy. Even things that I had done so many times before seemed impossible. Tying someone up for the first time was so difficult.
He felt particularly shameless. Although she had seemed willing before, he had actually used force on her. But that day, he was like possessed. No matter what, he had to have her once before he killed her. At that time, he thought she was just like those female spies, numb and indifferent. It didn't matter if he had done it once more. But he just felt it was too much. Because of this mentality, he became even more ruthless. He didn't know how to treat her well. She was simply fierce on the outside but weak on the inside. She was not honest at all. She was ignorant and fearless, not afraid of him at all. She either stuck to him or responded to him violently with blind crickets from the beginning. She even turned around and looked at him with a pair of innocent big eyes. Her coquettish and silly look made him even more flustered.
He felt no pleasure that time, but she held an inexplicable attraction for him, making him unwilling to leave her too soon. He might very well end up killing her after this; this would be the first and last time. And so, they continued in this twisted way. The rain made the room even colder, and the breath they shared felt even warmer, hers carrying the scent of rain mixed with the fragrance of flowers. Her rain-soaked raincoat hung nearby, dripping down onto the bed, where it felt cold on her body, intensifying the scent of rain. Her body was so cold, like a newborn, hairless animal, wet by the autumn rain, smooth, soft, and cold. The whole room was filled with the sound of rain, the smell of rain, and their scent. He didn't dare look at her face, fearing he'd be unable to bring himself to do it later. Her hair was thick and dense, and in his hands it felt like a throbbing kitten. Gradually, he felt her body warm, and her sensations and breath grew more intense and steady.
They kept doing that until the rain stopped and the sky darkened, and he finally let her go.
Afterward, he was dejected. She lay there in bed, her clothes torn, her hair messy, her lips swollen, her makeup smudged. It was like a child trying to pick a beautiful flower, but in their haste, they knocked over the pot, sending soil and debris to the floor. The flower was also broken, a few petals falling off, and she lay there in such a miserable state.
He'd always been adept at handling women, never before had he felt such a sense of defeat. He felt depressed for a long time after that. Rationally, he needed to give her some time; being too proactive would only make him more passive. More importantly, he needed to sort out his feelings and understand why things had turned out this way. Only then could he figure out how to regain his composure.
But the next day, he heard that Mrs. Yi was next door, and knowing she would most likely be there, he couldn't help but go to see how she was feeling. Sure enough, she was furious, puffed up like a sullen kitten, not even looking at him. He was completely embarrassed and humiliated.
But before he could think clearly, a few days later, fearing she'd actually leave, they got back together. They reconciled with a sincerity that had been turned from fake to real. With the experience from the previous time, he finally regained his confidence and momentum.
But he always felt bad about that incident, thinking that she must be very disappointed in him.
In reality, in relationships, whoever falls in love first will be the first to panic. He would never know that her opinion on that incident was the opposite of his. She was ignorant and fearless, unaware that she had nearly lost her life, nor did she know why he did that. She just foolishly thought that he was under so much pressure that he had become perverted, and that he just liked to torture and ravage her like that. She also thought that if he was willing to take her body, it meant that he was willing to accept her as his mistress. She had finally succeeded in the first step. And he wanted her flesh and blood to come back to life, and she was very happy with this ignition. As for why he was angry with her for no reason and ignored her for many days, she was very confident that it was because he was emotionally unstable, like many superiors in novels, who liked to torture people.
People say that whoever gets serious first in a relationship loses. Between the two of them, he was the first one to fall in love and the first one to get serious, but in the end it was she who lost, and he was also the one who lost.
Back to the present, Wang Jiazhi didn't know why he was more excited than usual today, but listening to the sound of rain and the sound of raindrops falling on the remaining dead leaves on the trees only made her more intoxicated.
This time, she continued to do it until she couldn't stand it anymore. The rain was still falling outside. The two cats were also sleeping in a ball under the bed. She fell asleep quickly.
He looked at her sleeping form, she was truly beautiful, especially her full forehead, and her eyelashes were particularly long, especially at the corners of her eyes and eyebrows, where her eyelashes were even longer, like the fluttering antennae of a moth, adding a touch of charm to her beauty.
In his previous life, he thought that he liked her more and more, so he thought she was becoming more and more beautiful.
She felt it every day when she looked in the mirror. Although she was avoiding it in her heart, she had to admit that the more she slept with him... the more beautiful she became.
From the beginning, Kuang Yumin had some feelings for her, but his desire to exploit her far outweighed his feelings. To him, she was just a pretty, ordinary girl, far from enough to attract him to a deeper relationship. This was especially true after Kuang Yumin began to dislike her. However, as he saw her becoming increasingly beautiful, mysterious, and noble, he actually wanted to win her back.
Kuang Yumin has always been a man of few words. In his career, he sacrificed her and hid behind her, hoping to reap the fruits of her labor. In his love life, he schemed to the point of exhaustion and despise her. But when others painstakingly nurtured her, bringing out the best in her, and making her radiant and radiant, Kuang Yumin wanted to reap the benefits without any effort. If she still looked as haggard as she did when they met again three years later, he wouldn't even consider winning her back.
It was already dark outside, and the rain was still falling. She woke up, and it was time to feed the baby. She got dressed, went out, and brought the baby in. As soon as she left, he woke up, and seeing the baby curled up in her arms, nursing, her current body made him even more obsessed.
He rested his head on her legs, and his daughter was nursing while holding his hair with one little hand.
After feeding, they played with the child for a while, but the little one clearly didn't want to sleep. So she put him in his cradle and told her to soothe him to sleep. Then she undressed herself and decided to hold him back to sleep. It was a rare opportunity to hold him in her arms while he was home during the day. Bored and drawn to the atmosphere, her daughter fell asleep too.
In her previous life, he wanted her to start over, and she started over, but she still came to him to start over.
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