Chapter 13
Xia Wan's escape was like a stone dropped into a deep pond, creating ripples in her own world but seemingly failing to truly touch the seemingly calm surface of Jiangyu—at least, on the surface. She returned to her hometown, immersed herself in her new job, seeking a moment of peace among the bricks, tiles, and wooden beams of the old buildings. Lin Wei's messages arrived daily, full of banter and careful avoidance of that name. Xia Wan replied, "I'm fine, don't worry," but the dull ache in her heart quietly spread in the stillness of the night. With busyness and silence, she mended her shattered self-esteem, trying to seal that hastily concluded "trial."
However, the illusion of calm was broken on the fifth day.
That afternoon, Xia Wan was inside the wooden temple under renovation, intently recording crack data on the beams and pillars. Her phone vibrated. It was Lin Wei. Frowning, Xia Wan walked to a corner and answered the call.
"Wanwan!" Lin Wei's voice was low, filled with a strange mixture of excitement and nervousness. "Guess what? Li Mo, Jiang Yu's assistant, just called me! He was trying to get your exact address in Jincheng! He even asked about the places you frequented back home! Oh my god, is Jiang Yu... going to kill you?!"
Xia Wan's heart sank, and her fingers gripping the phone instantly turned cold. He...came to see her? Not for work, not for anything else, but... because of her? Because of her breakup message?
Panic gripped her. Why had he come after her? Was he offended? Was he going to confront her directly? Or was he trying to use his "compensation theory" to convince her to continue this ridiculous "experiment"? Either way, she felt a suffocating pressure. She had finally managed to escape, and only just managed to build up the fragile psychological defenses she had. She couldn't let him break it so easily!
"Weiwei! Don't tell him!" Xia Wan's voice was filled with undeniable urgency and a barely perceptible tremor. "Just say you don't know! Say I didn't tell you the specific address!"
"Ah? This..." Lin Wei hesitated. "Looking at his attitude... he won't give up until he finds you. Wanwan, you really don't want to see him? Maybe..."
"No!" Xia Wan interrupted firmly, "Weiwei, please block him for me. Just say that I... went back to the countryside to visit relatives, or went to another place to inspect a project. Just make up a reason! In short, I don't want to see him!" Her tone was almost pleading.
"Okay, okay, don't worry, I'll block it for you!" Lin Wei heard the panic in her voice and immediately agreed.
After hanging up the phone, Xia Wan leaned against the dusty brick wall, her heart aching. He was here. In this small town. The realization made her restless. Like a frightened rabbit, she instinctively wanted to hide even deeper. She even considered ending the project immediately and fleeing further away.
However, her body began to falter. Perhaps it was the mental stress and exhausting work of the past few days, or perhaps it was the cold and damp environment of the old building, but her old rib injury began to ache slightly. By the evening, the pain had intensified, making it difficult for her to breathe.
"Mr. Xia, you don't look well. Are you feeling unwell?" Xiao Zhao asked worriedly.
"It's okay, I'm probably a little tired." Xia Wan held on, not wanting to cause any more trouble.
"Or... why don't you go and have a look? I heard from the old men and women here that there is a community clinic nearby. The old Chinese doctor there is quite famous and is very good at treating injuries." Xiao Zhao suggested.
Xia Wan wanted to refuse, but the sharp pain in her ribs intensified. She really needed to take care of it, otherwise it would affect her work. Besides, the community clinic... should be safe, right? How could someone like Jiang Yu be in a place like that?
Hoping for a lucky break, but also feeling the excruciating pain, Xia Wan, accompanied by Xiao Zhao, went to a community clinic tucked away in an old alley. The clinic was small, with an old door lintel and the air thick with the aroma of traditional Chinese medicine. The old Chinese doctor, his hair and beard all white, examined her injuries with a steady hand.
"Your old injuries haven't healed yet, and you've overworked yourself, and there's also a bit of a cold invading you." The old Chinese doctor applied warm ointment to her while muttering, "Girl, you need to take good care of your injuries. Don't take advantage of your youth and ignore them. I'll prescribe a few plasters for you, and some medicinal wine to promote blood circulation and dissolve blood stasis. Use them on schedule. Don't exert yourself for the next few days, and get plenty of rest."
Xia Wan nodded repeatedly, wanting only to get the medicine and leave quickly. The smell of medicine and the waiting patients in the clinic made her feel inexplicably anxious.
Just as the old Chinese doctor turned around to prepare medicine and Xia Wan lowered her head to adjust her clothes, the creaking old wooden door of the clinic was pushed open.
A fresh, familiar scent of cool outdoor air, mixed with the unique smell of fir aftershave, forcefully invaded this small space filled with the aroma of Chinese medicine.
Xia Wan's body stiffened instantly! A chill rushed from her feet to her head! She didn't even need to look up to know who was coming! The presence was too strong, like a physical presence pressing on her back.
She raised her head stiffly and very slowly.
Jiang Yu was standing at the door.
He stood tall and straight in a dark grey cashmere coat, a stark contrast to the shabby, dated clinic. His face was tired, with a hint of blue under his eyes, clearly indicating a lack of rest in recent days. Despite his travels, he couldn't conceal his alluring presence. His gaze, like a pinpoint searchlight, instantly locked onto her, seated on a bench in the corner of the clinic. A complex tapestry of emotions swirled in his deep eyes—relief at having found her, weariness from the long journey, anger at being rejected, and a deep, obsessive feeling that Xia Wan couldn't fathom.
Their eyes met. The air seemed to freeze. The whispers of the other patients in the clinic, the clatter of the old Chinese doctor pounding medicine, all seemed to have been muted. Xia Wan felt her heart pounding wildly in her chest, almost breaking free. She subconsciously tried to stand up and run, but the sharp pain in her ribs made her movement slow. She groaned and fell back to the ground, her face even paler.
Jiang Yu's brows knitted together instantly! He strode through the small waiting area, ignoring the curious glances of others, and walked straight to Xia Wan. His tall figure cast a heavy shadow, completely covering her.
"You..." Xia Wan's voice was dry and tense, filled with fear and resistance, "How did you find this place?"
Jiang Yu didn't answer immediately. His sharp gaze swept across her painfully furrowed brow, across her hand clutching her ribs, and finally back to her pale, frightened face. His eyes were as deep as a bottomless, cold pond, the churning emotions within them threatening to swallow her whole.
"Xia Wan," his voice was low and hoarse, filled with fatigue from a long journey and a suppressed, impending anger. Every word seemed to be squeezed out from between his teeth. "Are you hiding from me?"
It wasn't a question, it was a statement, with a cold, all-knowing air.
Xia Wan's heart suddenly sank. Under his oppressive gaze, all her explanations and excuses seemed pale and powerless. She turned her face away, biting her lower lip, and remained silent. The curious gazes of the other patients in the clinic pierced her like needles, making her feel extremely embarrassed.
At this moment, the old Chinese doctor came over with the prepared medicine. Seeing Jiang Yu, he was stunned for a moment: "Who is this...?"
Jiang Yu finally shifted his gaze from Xia Wan's face and looked at the old Chinese doctor. His tone instantly returned to his usual calmness with a sense of distance, but he still left no room for doubt: "How is she?"
"Oh, it's an old injury caused by overuse, plus a bit of cold. It's not a big problem, but you have to take good care of yourself and not get too tired or hurt." The old Chinese doctor handed the medicine to Xia Wan and muttered a few words of precautions.
Xia Wan took the medicine bag and just wanted to escape from this suffocating place immediately. She stood up despite the pain, lowered her head and tried to squeeze past Jiang Yu.
Jiang Yu, however, stood in front of her like a wall, motionless. His gaze was fixed on her, with no intention of letting go, only an irresistible persistence.
"Get out of the way..." Xia Wan's voice was filled with a hint of resolute pleading, like the last bit of dignity in her heart.
Jiang Yu remained motionless, simply staring at her, his lips tightly pursed, his jawline tense. The clinic was eerily quiet, as everyone stared at the couple, who clearly felt something was amiss.
"Xia Wan," Jiang Yu spoke again. His voice was low, but it clearly pierced the silence. It carried a kind of resolution that was almost a declaration, but also a subtle hint of fatigue and... hurt? "You owe me an answer."
"Go out first." Xia Wan spoke, her voice light and steady, like a clear spring flowing in a mountain stream, without the slightest ripple.
The weather in early winter was dry, and a slightly chilly wind was blowing in the northern town in the evening. Two people stood beside the car, and no one opened the door to get in.
"Xia Wan," his voice was low and hoarse, carrying the roughness of the journey and suppressed emotions, "What did your message mean?"
"It means exactly what it says, Jiang Yu." Xia Wan's voice was still gentle, but with an unquestionable clarity, "Let's end it here between us." Her words fell like a feather, but their weight was heavier than a thousand pounds.
"Is that the end?" Jiang Yu repeated, with disbelief and offended anger, "Xia Wan, who do you take me for?" There was a suppressed storm in his voice.
"That's exactly what I wanted to ask you." Xia Wan's voice was still gentle, but it had a penetrating power, like a fine needle. "Jiang Yu, what do you take me for?"
She took a small step forward, not bringing them much closer, but staring at him more intently, trying to penetrate the mist in his eyes.
"A 'creditor' you need to repay? A responsibility to fill a void? Or…" Her voice paused, with a barely perceptible bitterness, but she clearly said the word that stuck in her throat, "A shadow that occasionally reminds you of someone?"
As soon as the word "shadow" fell, Jiang Yu's face instantly darkened! The rage surging in his eyes almost broke through his restraints. His jawline was tense, and his fists were clenched almost imperceptibly at his sides.
"Xia Wan!" He growled, feeling embarrassed and even more confused as if a sore spot had been touched. "You..."
"Me what?" Xia Wan interrupted him softly, her voice not loud, as if she had used up all her strength. She faced the question she least wanted to face. In order to put an end to this unclear and ambiguous relationship, she clenched her fists and finally asked.
Jiangyu, ten years have passed. Xia Wan silently recalled this time in her heart, without accusation, only a heavy sense of fact.
She lowered her eyes slightly, her long eyelashes casting a faint shadow under her eyes. When she raised them again, her gaze was clear and firm.
"I know my own feelings better than anyone else, and I know what true love is. It shouldn't be charity, it shouldn't be compensation, and it certainly shouldn't be a substitute for anyone. I, Xia Wan, don't need you to 'test it' out of guilt, nor do I need to live under anyone's shadow."
"So," Xia Wan's voice was gentle yet decisive, like a dagger wrapped in silk, "let's end it. This is good for both of us. You don't owe me anything, and I don't need your compensation. That's it."
With that, she turned resolutely away from the shifting expression on his face. Her steps weren't fast, even slightly slowed by the strain of an old injury, but her back was straight, and each step was steady and resolute. Ten years of secret love had tempered her heart, making it flexible and clear-headed. Love wasn't about possession, nor was it about compromise. She loved him, but she also loved herself.
"Xia Wan!" Jiang Yu's voice rang out behind her, no longer a low growl, but with an unprecedented, almost inappropriate hoarseness and urgency, even... a hint of panic? "Wait!"
Xia Wan didn't stop.
Jiang Yu didn't try to stop her verbally, nor did he make any drastic moves. He simply took a step forward, silently closing the distance. His gaze was no longer filled with anger or questioning, but instead was fixed fixed on Xia Wan's back. Within those deep eyes, a near-desperate persistence, a kind Xia Wan had never seen before, surged with... a profound, almost desperate, bewilderment that felt like being pushed to the brink.
He looked at her back, which never turned back, and opened his mouth, as if he wanted to say something, but his throat seemed to be blocked by gravel. In the end, he could only squeeze out a few words with great pain and confusion:
"Why... don't you even give me a chance to explain?"
This shattering voice, like a needle tempered with ice, instantly pierced Xia Wan's newly built, seemingly solid defenses. It wasn't because of the questioning, but because of the pure, immense confusion and... pain contained in that voice.
Why does it end?
Why push away?
Why...why don't you even want to listen to what he says?
Xia Wan's fingers gripped the medicine bag, tightening slightly. The warm medicine bag seemed to be burning hot.
Why? Because she was a complete coward herself. Her love for him was so intense that it practically overflowed. When he said, "Give it a try," she wanted to set off fireworks at the entrance of the village for three days and three nights. The boy she had admired for ten years, the boy who had filled her youth, actually said to her, "Give it a try." She was thrilled. Was she also special for this boy? But facing his calm attitude was more painful than death itself. So she ran away. She didn't want to ask why. She didn't want this time to erode her memory of that boy.
She maintained a surface of calm, but deep within her heart, a wave of confusion, emanating from the depths of her soul and tinged with immense pain, suddenly stirred a turbulent tide. The boundaries she had thought were clear seemed, at that moment, torn open by this shattering questioning, an unexpected rift. Her gentle, assertive opinion, at that moment, met with an equally deep yet chaotic obsession.
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