Chapter 30
She turned and surveyed this familiar space. His refreshing scent seemed to linger in the entranceway, and the wrinkles in the thin blanket on the sofa bore traces of his protective presence. Last night's storm had subsided, leaving behind not chaos but a strange, lingering tranquility. She took a deep breath, and the air seemed to still hold the sweet aroma of that bowl of porridge.
"When you're awake, look at me and tell me your answer."
Jiang Yu's words, deep and solemn, etched themselves into her heart like a brand. There was no pressure, only frank affirmation and patient waiting. This respect, like a warm current, smoothed out the wrinkles in her heart caused by last night's chaos.
Xia Wan didn't immediately become entangled. She knew herself too well. A decade of secret love had already taken root deep within her heart, and the throbbing and dependence brought by last night's kiss were too real to ignore. But precisely because of this, she needed time to clear her mind. This relationship was too precious, carrying too much weight from the past and the complexity of the present. They had started out in a chaotic manner. She didn't know what position the current "Xia Wan" and the past "Shen Zhiyao" held in Jiang Yu's heart. She couldn't make a hasty decision based on a momentary impulse or emotion.
She needed time, a completely sober state, to re-examine her own heart, Jiang Yu as a person, and all the "perceptions" and "possibilities" between them. What she wanted was not an answer fueled by alcohol or gratitude, but a choice that could withstand scrutiny under the sun.
First, she needed to get back into her daily routine.
She stepped into the bathroom, the warm water washing away last night's fatigue and the lingering smell of alcohol. Looking in the mirror, her face remained a little pale, but her eyes had regained their former clarity and calm. She carefully took care of her skin, changed into comfortable home clothes, and folded and put away the thin blanket that had carried his scent. Then, she picked up her phone and sent a simple message to the colleague in charge of attendance at the hospital: "I'm not feeling well, taking a day off." No further explanation was given.
After finishing all this, she made herself a cup of warm honey water and sat by the sunlit bay window. The warm winter sun shone through the glass, making her feel lazy. She didn't deliberately think about last night, nor did she rush to analyze her feelings. She just sat quietly, feeling the peace that came with surviving a disaster. Her thoughts were like dust particles floating in the sun, rising and falling freely. Occasionally, she would glance at Jiang Yu's deep eyes, at his warm fingertips as he handed her the bowl of porridge, at the words "What I want is your choice when you are sober," and a subtle, warm ripple would spread in her heart.
That afternoon, she forced herself to deal with some backlogged work emails and reply to a few necessary messages. As she read the project team's discussion regarding the progress of the Gold Award application, her eyes lingered on Jiang Yu's name. She recalled what Engineer Zhao had casually revealed about his dedication to that crucial paper. This silent support, filtered by the morning light, seemed even more profound and precious.
In the evening, the doorbell rang. It was Lin Wei, rushing in with a large bag of fruit and snacks.
"Wanwan! How are you? Any stories about yesterday's celebration party?" As soon as Lin Wei entered the door, she pulled Xia Wan over and looked her up and down, her eyes filled with undisguised worry and a burning fire of gossip.
Xia Wan was amused by her nervousness, and a warm feeling welled up in her heart. "I'm fine, Weiwei. It's just... I drank a little too much last night, and I'm a little uncomfortable. I slept all day." She pulled Lin Wei to sit down, avoiding the main issue.
"Drunk?" Lin Wei narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "Just drunk? Jiang Yu sent you back? And then what? A man and a woman alone in a room together for a whole night! Didn't anything earth-shattering happen?" She leaned closer, lowered her voice, and looked at him with a look of "you know what I mean." "That guy Jiang Yu didn't do anything to you, did he?"
Xia Wan's cheeks flushed slightly. Facing her most trusted friend, she no longer hid everything, but she also chose to keep the most private details to herself. "He... did take me back. I was pretty drunk, and he... took care of me. He later rested on the sofa." She paused, looking into Lin Wei's inquiring eyes, and added, her tone tinged with a subtle softness and... confusion, "Weiwei, he... seems... really different."
These words, like a key, instantly unlocked Lin Wei's chatterbox. She immediately put aside the gossip and turned serious. "Tell me! What's different? Did you finally get it? Did you confess your feelings?"
Xia Wan didn't directly answer the question of whether she confessed her feelings or not. Instead, she recounted the key points of Jiang Yu's defense last night, how he'd blocked her drinking, sent her home, and taken care of her, as well as his words this morning about "boundaries" and "conscious choices." She omitted the passionate kiss and her embarrassing attempts to keep him, emphasizing only Jiang Yu's restraint, sense of responsibility, and the solemn wait he'd shown.
After hearing this, Lin Wei's eyes widened, and after a long while, she slapped her thigh, "Wow! Jiang Yu is amazing! Such awareness! Such action!" She excitedly grabbed Xia Wan's hand, "Wan Wan! What does this mean? It means that he's not acting on impulse! He's serious! He cares about you, so much that he doesn't want to take advantage of you! He's waiting for you to be willing! Oh my God, it's hard to find a man like this nowadays!"
Xia Wan smiled helplessly at Lin Wei's exaggerated reaction, but her heart felt more reassured by her bestie's affirmation. "I know he's probably serious. But Weiwei," she sighed softly, a look of sober confusion in her eyes, "you know what's going on between us... is too complicated. There's the past, how we started, and then there's... that barrier in his heart. I need time to think it over. I don't want to start something rashly just because I'm touched or... anything else."
Lin Wei looked at the familiar, gentle determination in Xia Wan's eyes, put away her joking expression, and nodded vigorously: "I understand! Wanwan, I support you! You should think about it carefully! Our Wanwan deserves the best, and you must nod your approval clearly and unequivocally! Jiang Yu is waiting, so let him wait! Test him! Besides, you have been waiting for him for so many years..." She paused, and smiled slyly, "But... considering that he has been performing well, it is not impossible to give him some sweet treats occasionally and keep him hanging..."
Xia Wan was so amused by her that she didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She gently pushed her and said, "What are you talking about?"
Her bestie's arrival was like a fresh breeze, clearing away the last vestiges of gloom from Xia Wan's heart. They ate fruit, chatted about gossip, and complained about work, filling the apartment with a long-lost sound of laughter. Xia Wan felt like she was back on solid ground. The chaos of last night and the throbbing of this morning had transformed into a memorable, yet no longer troubling, experience in her life.
Late in the night, after Lin Wei had left, Xia Wan lay in bed, unable to sleep. The moonlight from the window cast a cool, clear glow across the floor. She picked up her phone, her fingertips unconsciously swiping across the screen until they finally landed on a familiar contact name: Jiang Yu.
Since he left in the morning, there has been no message or phone call. This silence is not a retreat, but more like a tacit respect, a silent understanding that she "needs time".
She looked at the name, feeling no anxiety, but instead a strange calm. She remembered the warm smile he had given her when he left that morning, and what he had said, "What I want is for you to look at me when you're awake and tell me your answer."
Xia Wan placed her phone beside her pillow and closed her eyes. In her heart, the seed called "possibility" seemed to gently and contentedly unfold its tender leaves under the moonlight.
She knew that the daily routine of reconstruction had begun, and the future of that seed would be written by her own hands with every sober sunrise and sunset.
In the days that followed, Xia Wan's life seemed to have hit a sort of orderly reset button. She returned to the design institute and plunged into the intense preparation of her Gold Award application materials. Her work became her most solid anchor, her focus on her professional field allowing her to temporarily put aside the complex emotions swirling within her.
A new and subtle tacit understanding also formed between her and Jiang Yu.
There was no constant bombardment of messages, no deliberate "chance encounters." Jiang Yu seemed to have fully lived up to his promise to "wait," giving Xia Wan absolute space. Yet, his presence didn't disappear; instead, it permeated her daily life in a more natural and comforting way.
For example, while reviewing the key technical demonstrations for her Gold Award application, Xia Wan encountered a difficult question regarding regional variations in the traditional method's mix ratios while reviewing data comparing the performance of a new composite material with that of a traditional "glutinous rice mortar." She consulted extensively, but couldn't agree on a single point. Just as she was frowning in thought, her phone screen lit up, revealing a message:
Regarding the regional variations in the glutinous rice mortar ratio in JG-1927-03, please refer to Volume 7, page 93 of Jiangnan Construction Supplement. This book is in the collection of the Tianjin Library, Ancient Books, numbered GT-730.
It was as precise as if a surveillance camera had been installed. Astonished, Xia Wan immediately contacted the Ancient Books Department and, indeed, they found the precious, rare copy, resolving the problem that had been vexing her for so long. She didn't reply with a thank you note, but instead meticulously cited the document in the core sections of her subsequent application materials, clearly citing the source in the footnotes.
A few days later, she worked late into the night. As she left the design institute building, she noticed a fine, winter rain had begun falling. The wind blew the raindrops, icy and biting. She was just about to rush out into the rain to hail a taxi when her eyes flicked to the windowsill of the guardhouse. A familiar, brand-new, long-handled black umbrella lay quietly leaning against it.
No signature, no message.
But Xia Wan knew who it was.
A warm current quietly flowed into her heart. She picked up her umbrella and opened it. The wide canopy instantly blocked out the cold rain. Raindrops hit the canopy with a dull, rhythmic sound. Holding this silent guard, she walked into the rainy night, her heart at peace.
They occasionally bumped into each other in professional settings. At a small seminar on the preservation and renewal of historic districts, the two were on different panels. During a coffee break, Xia Wan stood by the floor-to-ceiling window, gazing at the streetscape outside, coffee in hand. Jiang Yu approached, chatting with several experts, and his eyes met hers.
Standing a few steps away, he didn't deliberately approach to chat, but simply nodded slightly, his deep eyes calm and composed, as if he were looking at an ordinary colleague. But Xia Wan clearly caught a fleeting, warm light beneath that calmness, like a warm current flowing beneath the surface of a quiet lake. She nodded in response, her lips unconsciously curling into a gentle curve. Without words, it felt like a silent greeting.
This restrained, distanced yet omnipresent care is like a stove that continuously emits heat in winter, not scorching but continuously warming Xia Wan's heart. It makes her feel safe and respected, and also gives her ample space to feel and think.
Lin Wei became an important listener and "strategist" for her to sort out her emotions.
"Tsk tsk, Mr. Jiang's skill in 'moistening things silently' is remarkable!" Lin Wei bit her straw and smacked her lips as she described the umbrella and the information to Xia Wan. "He's an expert! Absolutely an expert! He knew that a strong attack wouldn't work, so he switched to a protracted war and a warm-hearted approach! Wanwan, tell me, are you feeling warmed?"
Xia Wan held the hot cocoa, her cheeks slightly red, and did not deny: "Yes... very thoughtful. And, it makes people feel no pressure."
"That's right!" Lin Wei slammed the table, "It means he really listened to your words! He's waiting for your 'clear choice'! But Wanwan," she leaned closer and lowered her voice, "We can't just passively wait to be warmed! You have to give him some signals, let him know his 'warmth' is not in vain, the ground here is warm, and the seeds can sprout!"
Xia Wan's heartbeat quickened at what she said: "Give...what signal?"
"Stupid!" Lin Wei rolled her eyes. "For example... send a message proactively? Ask a professional question? Or... make a dinner appointment? Of course, it has to be sober and non-work-related!" She winked.
initiative?
Xia Wan's heart fluttered slightly. She was used to passively accepting his kindness, used to feeling it from a safe distance. Actively approaching... she didn't seem ready. But Lin Wei's words, like a small stone, cast a ripple in the calm lake of her heart.
The opportunity soon came in an unexpected way.
On Friday afternoon, Xia Wan was in the office finishing the final draft of her application materials when her cell phone rang. It was an unfamiliar local number.
"Hello, are you Miss Xia Wanxia?" A gentle female voice.
"Yes, may I ask who you are?"
"Hello, Miss Xia. I'm a nurse in the orthopedics department of Jinzhou First Hospital. Your follow-up appointment for your rib fracture is up, and I'd like to confirm your appointment time for next week..."
Xia Wan suddenly remembered the fracture she'd suffered in the accident at the old factory a few months prior. The doctor had indeed advised regular checkups. With the relentless work and emotional turmoil of recent projects, she'd completely forgotten about it.
"Oh... sorry, I forgot about the appointment. When would you like to make it next week?"
The nurse checked for her and said, "Director Zhou is available next Tuesday at 3:00 PM. Is that okay with you?"
"Okay, let's do Tuesday at three o'clock in the afternoon. Thank you." Xia Wan noted the time.
After hanging up the phone, she looked at the mark on the calendar and frowned slightly. Jinzhou First Hospital was located in the old city, a distance from both the design institute and her residence. Public transportation was not very convenient, and taxis were often stuck in traffic. Lin Wei had driven with her to the previous checkups. She edited the message and sent it to her best friend.
Soon, I received a reply message saying, "Dear Xia Xiaowan, your dear best friend is going on a business trip next Tuesday! (crying)."
It looked like I had no choice but to book a ride. Just as I was considering ordering a private car, my phone screen lit up again. It was a message from Jiang Yu, but the content had nothing to do with work, which seemed a bit... abrupt?
"Next Tuesday afternoon, there's an on-site consultation for a renovation project near the First Municipal Hospital. It'll end around 3:30. Need a ride? Jiang."
Xia Wan's heart skipped a beat!
The time and place... coincided so precisely! This couldn't be a coincidence!
How did he…know that she was going to the hospital for a follow-up checkup? And even knew the exact time?
A thought flashed through his mind—it was Lin Wei! This "military advisor" must have tipped her off! Xia Wan was both angry and amused, but deep down, a surge of warmth welled up uncontrollably in his heart. He knew, but he didn't point it out directly. Instead, he cautiously extended an olive branch in a seemingly "convenient" way that was extremely respectful of her privacy and self-esteem.
He remembered her injury. He might even have been keeping an eye on her recovery. This attentiveness and subtle concern moved her more than any direct inquiries.
Xia Wan gripped the phone, her fingertips slightly warm. She looked at the message, almost as if she could see the man on the other side of the screen, perhaps hesitating before sending it, afraid to offend. Lin Wei's words echoed in her ears again: "Give me a signal... The ground here is hot..."
A sense of courage, mixed with warmth and a hint of hidden expectation, quietly rose.
She took a deep breath, tapped her fingertips lightly on the screen, deleted the polite refusal or polite excuses she had originally thought of, and finally replied:
"Okay. Thank you. See you at the entrance of the First Municipal Hospital at 3:00 PM on Tuesday. Xia."
Message sent successfully.
Xia Wan put down her phone, feeling her cheeks flush and her heart beating faster. But this time, it wasn't panic or embarrassment, but a kind of... a slight nervous yet incredibly solid throbbing feeling of taking a small step forward.
She knew that this was no longer just his one-sided "approach."
This was the first time she actively and clearly responded to his warmth while she was awake.
It is a test and also a signal.
Tell him: I feel your warmth. This land is warm.
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