Chapter 320 I Don't Want to Advise!
A few days later, after the palace servants had packed up the belongings, Shui Xian decided to move them back to Lihe Palace.
Upon hearing that Narcissus was returning, Feng Shunxiang cautiously asked, "Your Majesty, the Qianqing Palace has been preparing things for you..."
"I am used to living in the Lihe Palace, which is quiet and peaceful."
Shui Xian interrupted him, her voice calm, "Please trouble Eunuch Feng to convey to His Majesty that I am unwell and need to rest quietly, so it is inconvenient to disturb me."
The words were polite, but the meaning couldn't be clearer.
She refused to move back into the Qianqing Palace, effectively separating from her family.
When the news spread, it caused an uproar in the palace and the court.
Emperor Zhaoheng made no attempt to stop her, seemingly unconcerned. However, the day after Shui Xian returned to the palace, an imperial edict was issued from the imperial study:
“Princes and princesses are young and need to stay by their mothers’ side often to be nurtured by benevolence and filial piety and cultivate their character.”
"From this day forward, from 9:00 AM to 3:00 PM every day, the wet nurse shall bring Princess Yongning, Prince Qingyan, and Prince Qinghe to Lihe Palace to pay their respects to the Empress and accompany her to comfort her during her pregnancy and to ensure that the Empress enjoys the happiness of family life."
The imperial decree was issued in a grand and dignified manner, and no one could find fault with it.
But Narcissus knew that this was his tactic.
Every day at 9:00 AM, the nannies would bring their three children to the Lihe Palace in a grand procession.
Yongning is almost three years old, a time when he is very active and energetic.
As soon as he entered, he rushed into Shui Xian's arms, "Mother! Yongning missed you!"
Qingyan and Qinghe are one and a half years old, just the age when they are learning to walk.
The two little ones, supported by their wet nurse, wobbled over and called out in their childish voices, "Mother...hug..."
The moment Narcissus saw the children, her heart melted completely.
She knelt down, opened her arms, and hugged all three children.
Yongning chattered on about what she had seen and heard these past few days: "Father took Yongning to see the foals!"
"Yongning recited a new poem to his mother!"
Qingyan quieted down, only holding tightly to Shuixian's neck, her small face pressed against her cheek.
Qinghe was much more lively, squirming in her arms and reaching out to touch the hairpin in her hair.
The Reiwa Palace was suddenly filled with life because of the children's arrival.
The children's innocent laughter was like sunshine, temporarily dispelling the gloom in her heart.
But whenever the children got tired of playing and were coaxed by the wet nurse to take a nap in the side hall, all that remained in Narcissus's eyes was reluctance and helplessness.
If she were to leave the palace, she would certainly not be able to take the child with her, and for the first time, she felt hesitant about leaving the palace.
That afternoon, Yongning touched Shuixian's swollen belly, looked up at her with a curious expression, and asked, "Mother, when will my little brother or sister come out to play with me?"
Narcissus stroked her daughter's soft hair and whispered, "It'll be soon."
"Yongning prepared a lot of gifts for her!"
Yongning's eyes sparkled, "There's a rattle drum and a little cloth tiger!"
Narcissus smiled, but as she smiled, her eyes became hot.
Yongning seemed to sense her emotions, reached out her small hand, gently touched her face, and said indistinctly, "Mother... don't cry."
Narcissus was startled, only then realizing that a tear had fallen without her noticing.
She quickly wiped away her tears and hugged her daughter tightly. "Mother didn't cry... Mother is happy..."
During the time the mother and daughter spent together, Shui Xian did not see that a bright yellow figure had been standing under the corridor of the main hall of Lihe Palace for an unknown period of time.
Emperor Zhaoheng hid in the shadows behind the pillar, looking through the half-open window at the scene inside the palace where Shui Xian was holding her child and enjoying the happiness of mother and daughter.
...She softened her heart.
Perhaps... there is still room for maneuver.
Emperor Zhaoheng stood silently for a long time, until his legs were a little stiff, before quietly turning around and leaving.
——
The Empress Dowager, who was far away in the imperial palace, soon learned of Shui Xian's desire to leave the palace through Emperor Zhaoheng.
This elderly man, who had lived through two dynasties and seen many storms, made a special trip back from the imperial palace and summoned Shui Xian to the Cining Palace.
"Your Majesty, please sit."
The Empress Dowager pointed to the chair below her.
After bowing respectfully, Narcissus sat down and waited quietly with her eyes lowered.
The Empress Dowager did not speak immediately. After a long while, she slowly said, "I heard that you and the Emperor had some unpleasantness at the temporary palace?"
Narcissus lowered her head: "It is my fault for angering the Emperor."
"Get angry?"
The Empress Dowager chuckled softly, but the smile didn't reach her eyes. "I know the Emperor's temperament well... Empress, tell me, what exactly do you want?"
Narcissus raised her eyes to meet the Empress Dowager's probing gaze: "Your Majesty... I only ask to live the rest of my life according to my own heart."
"Follow your heart?"
The Empress Dowager shook her head. “Empress, now that you have taken this position, you should know that the word ‘self’ is the most luxurious thing. You are the Empress, the Mother of the Nation, and the role model for all women. Your self must give way to the dignity of the Emperor and the well-being of the nation.”
Her tone grew more serious, carrying the admonition of an elder.
"The whole world has seen how the Emperor treats you... What empress in history has ever received such favor? Now that you are carrying the Emperor's child, you should be even more careful in your words and deeds, to ensure the continuation of the royal family and to assist the Emperor in stabilizing the country. Instead of being willful and reckless, you have chilled the Emperor's heart and failed to live up to my expectations for you."
The words were very strong, almost an explicit warning.
The rising smoke of sandalwood incense blurred the Empress Dowager's solemn face.
Shui Xian listened quietly, and only after the Empress Dowager finished speaking did she slowly rise, walk to the center of the hall, and kneel down.
"Your Majesty's teachings are etched in my heart."
She spoke, her voice calm, "In my entire life, I have never had my own heart."
She looked up.
"As a child, I was a slave, my life, honor, and disgrace all depended on the whim of my master. As a maid in the palace, every step I took was like walking on thin ice, just to survive. As a concubine and empress, all I thought about was how to secure my position... In half my life, I have never... lived a single day for myself."
The Empress Dowager was stunned.
She looked at the narcissus kneeling on the ground and suddenly understood.
The Empress Dowager remained silent for a long time, finally letting out a long sigh and wearily waving her hand:
"Enough... I'm too old to concern myself with the affairs of you young people. You... step down."
The attempt to persuade them failed.
When Emperor Zhaoheng learned that the Empress Dowager's persuasion had failed, he sat quietly in the imperial study for a long time.
His knuckles tapped the table unconsciously, making a dull sound.
He was thinking about what other methods he could use.
Who else could persuade her?
Suddenly, he remembered someone.
That woman who was once on good terms with Narcissus in the imperial harem.
Tuoba.
Perhaps... as a woman who had also been in the imperial harem, Tuoba could understand Narcissus and persuade her.
"Feng Shunxiang".
Emperor Zhaoheng spoke, “Summon the Tuoba clan to the palace. Tell them… the Empress is lonely during her pregnancy, and I invite her to the palace to keep me company and reminisce.”
——
Tuoba soon entered the palace.
She is no longer a concubine; she wears riding attire in the style of the grasslands, her long hair is braided, her eyes are bright, and her demeanor is free and unrestrained.
Upon seeing Narcissus, she did not perform a grand ceremony, but simply bowed and clasped her hands, saying, "This humble subject, Tuoba, greets Your Majesty the Empress."
Narcissus dismissed everyone around her and personally helped her up, saying, "Get up quickly. There are no outsiders here, so there's no need to stand on ceremony."
Tuoba straightened up, carefully examined Shuixian, and frowned slightly: "Your Majesty has lost weight, is it... something on your mind?"
Shui Xian invited her to sit down, poured her some tea herself, and then said softly, "Tuoba, I... want to leave the palace."
Tuoba paused slightly in the hand holding the teacup.
She didn't speak immediately, but just quietly looked at the narcissus.
After a long while, Tuoba put down his teacup, then suddenly reached out and tightly grasped Shuixian's hand.
Her hands were rough, with calluses from holding the reins while riding a horse, yet they were warm and strong.
“Your Majesty,” Tuoba began, his voice low but each word clear, “No, Narcissus… I should call you that.”
Her gaze was intense, like the brightest star on the grassland:
"I have never admired you as much as I do now."
Narcissus was startled.
Tuoba gripped her hand tightly, his eyes gleaming with excitement:
"These palace walls are magnificent and resplendent; countless women from all over the world would kill to get in."
"But I know it devours people without spitting out the bones! It turns living people into tools for vying for favor!"
"What's wrong with wanting to live for yourself?"
She spoke with emotion, and her eyes welled up with tears:
"Narcissus, I support you! If you need me, my roots on the grasslands are always open for you! Wherever you want to go, whatever you want to do, as long as I can help, I will never refuse!"
This is not advice.
This is a show of support.
Narcissus's eyes welled up with tears again.
The pain of being misunderstood for many days finally found an outlet at this moment.
She grasped Tuoba's hand in return, "Thank you... thank you for understanding me..."
They talked for a while longer before parting ways just before the palace gates were locked.
Before Tuoba left the palace, Feng Shunxiang was ordered to come and inquire about the outcome of his persuasion.
Tuoba looked at the Grand Eunuch and said loudly:
"Reporting to Eunuch Feng, please convey to His Majesty... This humble subject is short-sighted and, as a son of the grasslands, I only know that life is short and happiness is paramount. As for Her Majesty the Empress's heart, I... cannot persuade her."
She paused, raised her head, and added the last sentence.
"I don't want to try to persuade them!"
After speaking, she turned around, mounted her horse, and moved with swift and graceful movements.
His back view was resolute, like an eagle finally soaring into the blue sky.
Feng Shunxiang relayed Tuoba's exact words to Emperor Zhaoheng.
A deathly silence fell over the Qianqing Palace.
Emperor Zhaoheng sat behind his desk, holding a memorial in his hand, but his gaze remained fixed on the void for a long time.
After an unknown amount of time, he slowly stood up and walked to the huge map hanging on the wall.
The map shows a vast and expansive land.
This is the Xiao family's territory, the country he has protected with half his life's blood and sweat.
He once thought that by possessing the world, he could give her everything.
But now he realizes that no matter how vast the world is, it is not as unpredictable as the heart of one person.
He could give her the position of empress, he could give her wealth and honor, and he could even give her unparalleled favor.
But it couldn't give her the freedom she wanted...
"Step down."
Emperor Zhaoheng had his back to Feng Shunxiang, his voice filled with endless weariness.
Feng Shunxiang bowed and quietly withdrew.
The palace doors closed.
Emperor Zhaoheng stood alone before the enormous map, looking up at the territory that symbolized supreme power, and suddenly felt an unprecedented emptiness.
Meanwhile, rumors about the previous dynasty, secretly stirred up by a few officials with ulterior motives, quietly escalated.
"The Empress is immoral, has defied the Emperor, and is unfit for the position of Empress..."
Similar claims began to circulate.
Beneath the calm surface, undercurrents are quietly gathering...
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